17 Dec 2025 · 4 min
Alex Korb explains why outside perspectives matter: coaches, friends, and therapists see patterns you can't see in yourself. He argues the real skill is deciding and adjusting later, not waiting for the perfect choice. Even Roger Federer kept a coach.
Can we be better at providing that value as a coach or a partner, a leader, et cetera? Yeah, yeah. It's interesting. The, like, this idea of, like, just that somebody else has a different perspective than the one that we have from the inside of our own experience, and that just any different perspective is valuable. And sometimes, you know, certain people's perspective can be more helpful than others. But, like, you know, that's talking to a friend or a mentor or your parents or a therapist. Like, any of those things would probably be better than just sitting there thinking by yourself, trying to do it over. And so again, going back to the, like, good decision versus making the best decision. Sometimes people get stuck when they're thinking about, well, should I go see a therapist? Like, well, maybe I just need a coach. Maybe I should just talk to my parents. Maybe I should just talk to my friends. Okay, well, like, just start doing any of those things, which is actually a very key point about decision making that I think most people don't appreciate. The most important part of decision making is that action. Like, it, okay, you might have arrived at, like, okay, I'm going to do this. Okay, great. Like, whatever you choose, like, and it doesn't matter if it feels like it's the right choice. Like, just do something. Like, pick a washing machine. Like, you can return it later. Like, you can make a different action, a different decision later. Just, like, do something. And so if you're trying to decide, like, well, is therapy right for me? Or. Or coaching and like, which therapist or, like, should I do? Like, any of them. Any of those choices is better than just doing nothing. So just pick one. And a lot of times people, when they think about a therapist, it's like, you know, they're proposing marriage. They're like, what if I don't like the therapist? Okay. Like, it's literally one hour of your time. Like, okay, it's like going on a date. Like, well, if you don't like the person, then don't go out with them. Again, like, it's we. Worrying is often about these, like, possibilities. Like, oh, what if? Blah, blah, blah. Okay, you can actually utilize your prefrontal cortex to answer that question. But like, well, what if you say, okay, well, then I would, you know, find a different therapist or then I would whatever. And like, it. It takes worrying by focusing on the, like, the controlling aspect that moves it into to planning the. But going back to your question about, like, the therapist, one of the. One of the things that reminds me of is like, why does Roger Federer have a tennis coach like he's the best player in the world. Okay, maybe joke, I don't know who's the best player but when Roger Federer was the best player in the world, like why does he have a coach like he's, he's better than any coach he could have. Like what's the point of having a coach? It's like ah, because like any sort of semi knowledgeable tennis player can see you from the outside in a way that you can't see yourself and can give you feedback or suggestions. And even if they aren't the best suggestions like it can still build an understanding, help you build an understanding of your self. And so you know even if you don't, you don't need to pick the best therapist. But if you feel really stuck then therapy can be really helpful for a wide variety of things certainly simply because like they're just a trained professional who offers this other perspective.
