Ep 14: The Path Forward with Idalia Salsamendi: Navigating Authenticity and Growth in the Digital Space (Part 2)
26 Dec 2024 · 50 min
Idalia Salsamendi talks with Brittany and Anthony about staying authentic while growing on social media. They discuss how influencer marketing has changed, the pressure to post constantly, and why convenience culture makes it harder to live mindfully.
The following podcast is a Dear media production.
Welcome back to the Long Game. If you joined us last week, you already know we're in the middle of an incredible two part conversation with our longtime friend and collaborator, Adalia Salsamendi. Adalia has over 20 years of experience in digital strategy and has been a huge part of our journey for nearly a decade. In the second part, we're diving into the realities of the digital world today. What it takes to stand out, stay authentic and grow sustainably while staying true to your values. It's a conversation packed with actionable steps and advice. So let's jump right in.
I think it's so hard for the younger generation too.
Yeah.
Because they grew up in it, they're consuming it.
Totally.
I mean, we've had to also, they're.
Like, frontal lobe isn't even fully developed.
Weren't you guys on MySpace and Facebook?
Yeah, I was on. I was on MySpace for top eight, 22,005, 2006, but always changed my song for high school.
You know what? I was voted most likely to be online.
No. Swear.
I thought it was gonna be like.
Where did you graduate?
2001.
2001?
Yeah. Oh, one or 2005.
Yeah. Four years.
But I don't feel like MySpace was very big. It was.
I was on it.
I was on. I was like AOL Messenger.
AOL Messenger. And like all the chat room at the Doghouse.
Like, I used like all the. Grew up in Miami. Like, it was all rap and like, I loved like the hip hop genre.
Yeah.
So all my things would be like little Kim, like quotes.
No, that's when I first learned to do online because you had to code your MySpace and you could put like cool graphics.
And so all my friends are like, of course you do what you do. Like, you've always. You've always done it and it goes back to. Yeah, but I let it serve me right.
Exactly.
Like it puts bread on the table.
Keeping the mindset.
Yeah. Yeah.
Oh, man.
Most likely to be online.
I remember we got Facebook in 2006.
It was in college.
In college. And I remember looking at. You can see who was in the dorms and you could figure out if you wanted to hang out with that person in the group. You're like, oh, that person already moved in. I thought that was really cool that we could meet up with someone because we didn't have anyone's phone numbers at the time. We just moved into the dorm. So it was crazy to think that I can know where that person. They posted, where their room was. If you wanted to stop by, I'm like, this is bizarre.
But then you would, like. And then on top of that, you would develop the photos, and then you would, like, have to wait at, like, CBS for an hour Express. And then you would upload it, and then you would post it on your Facebook, and it's like, oh, you know, drunk at the club, you know? But so I, like, when I see girls like Jaden or when I see the younger generation on social media, I always have to bring it, like, back to, like, you guys. We did that, too.
Yeah.
The only thing is, ours was a little bit more delayed.
Right.
And we had to have, like, sit in front of, like, a humongous computer.
Exactly.
Our parents thought the same thing. My mom thought, and you get off of AOL Messenger. And I'm like, I can't.
Right. I would meet people in there, probably weirdos. Yeah.
Chat rooms. Yeah. It was pretty sketch.
Yeah. You were natives.
Yeah.
So if we treat that conversation with this younger generation of, like, hey, let it serve you. Have fun with it. Of course. Like, it's a social platform, you know? Yes. Don't let it be your life.
Right.
That's it. That's, like, literally. And it was in our lives because we can go out and do our things. And there was no, you know, there wasn't any. There was no sense of urgency. Right. I think if we train ourselves with, like, calm down. The sense of urgency, I think we'd be happier as a culture.
Yeah.
That's just me.
I know. I think it's super hard for teenage girls, too, who are looking at this and you're seeing. I mean, when we were in high school, if I didn't get invited to something, no one knew until Monday, I was like, oh, yeah, I think I was there. But it's like, you. It was a little bit more wiggle room to be like, oh, yeah, I didn't go. But now it's like you're seeing it all in real time when it's happening. I do think it's the comparison of. Especially when they're on a snap map.
Oh, Jesus.
Yeah. That's another weird thing where you can see where all your friends are at.
Stop. See if someone's hanging out with other people all together.
I would have fomo.
Right. So there's this FOMO thing. It's like, how do you separate it from. If that's. All your friends are literally on their phones.
Nothing feels worse than not being invited to a party that you would even dare showing up to. Like, there's a. I think of mean girls. Like, it's so funny.
Yeah. It's like you want to be able to say no to it. Not just that you didn't get a breakout.
I mean, that's very high school mentality.
Yeah.
I don't know.
But it's sad for the. Yeah. The kids that are. Jaden has a. Now their school implemented where they drop off their phones in these little pouches at the beginning of the day. And I really like it because she was saying at lunch, no one talks on the. Everyone's on their phones at lunch because their phones were allowed before on. They were just. Everyone would be on it even if someone didn't want to be on it. It's like you kind of were left by yourself. So you just pull out your phone. So with this, she said a lot more people are talking. I really like that they have to get it unlocked at the end of the school day. It's kind of what they do for concerts too, and some of the bigger stadiums. But I think it's a really good concept for just getting outside, like you're at school that you can talk to people. But it's like getting out of that mindset of like constantly being able to scroll. It's a hard habit to break. But I think being really mindful about if you want to scroll or like mindless scrolling. What I call sometimes is like, don't let it just be a habit you pull out when you're bored. Like, let your brain actually be bored for a little bit like that. Don't let that be your default. Like, have it as like, okay, these 15 minutes, I'm going to. I'm going to mindful. I'm going to mindlessly scroll. But it's like I already planned these 15 minutes for that.
Yes. I started. I didn't do it here, you know, waiting to come on here. But I. And I caught myself. Caught myself and I put my phone out. But I have allowed myself to be bored. So anytime I'm waiting, I always show up like 10 minutes early. That's like a non Cuban in me. Because I hate people waiting for me and I hate waiting for people. So it's just like what I do. So I sit down, I allow myself to be bored.
I love that.
And I just sit with myself and you know, and then when I'm like, okay, it's been 10 minutes, I'm gonna check emails. Then I like. But it's very conscious. So you'll see me in like the subway or the tube, literally. Like New York or London. And I'm. I'm literally the weirdo. Just, like, staring up at. Because I love that.
You know, we started doing that in elevators. Like, our rule for elevators is we don't have our phone.
Oh, I never done that.
Yeah. It's actually really awkward at first because you're just staring.
Yeah. Because you just.
You're just not.
You have very limited room of where you can look, and everyone else is.
Throwing their phone so that no one's looking at you.
I'm like.
I'm the other one that. I'm like, oh, what is she wearing? Oh, she's so.
No, I'm just. We're just staring, and it's. Honestly, it's like we're bored for the. The ride, especially the last hotel we stay at. The ride was very. Felt very long, but I was like, okay, I'm just, like, letting my brain decompress.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Or I bring a book.
Yeah.
My hair lady is always like, you're the only person that I have that brings a book when they get their hair done.
I love that. And I'm like, yeah, just letting your mind just.
Let me just, like, not ghost on social media.
Yeah. And I. I think that's one thing that's really helped us lately is, like, leaving our phones at home when we do something.
Yeah.
And getting out of the mindset of, like, you have to have your phone, everything.
Danny and I don't do that during.
It's kind of nice. It's refreshing.
We don't. We don't take our phones out at night. And I also got, like. He got my Apple watch, so.
Oh, so you can, like, still call if you really need.
Oh, no, no. I can use the credit card.
Oh, right.
Cause I'm like, yeah, Apple pay.
That's the one thing.
Yeah. But usually you'll usually have it with you just in case we have to, like, pay for parking or.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, and Danny will bring his wallet, and he'll bring cash, and he'll bring, like, a credit card or two. But, yeah, we stopped putting phones out. It's like.
It's refreshing.
It's delicious. And obviously, like, we're out for, like, an hour or two, like, for dinner. It's not like we're out the entire day.
Yeah. But regardless, it is tough, though. Like, you have to really make an effort for it. And I feel like that's the only bummer I see of all this is, like, for all these, like, wellness things we're doing, we're doing all these things because like the modern society we live in is not. Is geared towards convenience, not for our true well being. And so we're doing all these things like to really amplify our health. But it's like we have to do all these extra steps just because it's like not. It's so not ingrained. Yeah.
So we're so Danny and I got a, we bought a holiday home in the south of Spain and it's. The house is from 1901 and there's like a lot of quirks to it and I'm not making it modern. Like I really want to respect like the Mudahar architecture and like the Spanish architecture that it naturally came with. So a lot of things are like for example, Danny's like, oh, for the blinds. Like, there's like, should we do it electronically? I'm like, no, like stop being so convenient. Like just like pull. And his, his dad is always like, convenience is what's going to kill us because we get so lazy. Like, oh, we no longer have to walk anymore. We can take a scooter or like just take the 20 minute walk. I mean, granted in Europe it's a little easier and like New York is easier than LA or Miami. But like your life should not be that. Again, living in a very privileged world. If you can take away some of the conveniences and like walk to the grocery store instead of taking the car, can you pull the window blinds? Instead of pressing a button, can you put the phone down and actually have a conversation? Right? Like there's like this, there's just like this beautiful little dance that you can do with your life on how can you be more active in your life and like versus expecting life to do things for you.
Right.
And like, I think that puts you in a different mindset as well, more proactive mindset. That's something that I've noticed, you know, with my husband and his, his family that are more traditional, you know, European small town. It's like they don't want conveniences. Like, they want to walk to the market because that's their exercise for the day. They want to pull the blinds because that takes 15 seconds. And they're actively involved on where the blind is and how they want it. And I think that's so cool. So cool. Obviously everything's a balance, but like that's, that's a lesson I learned and like I'm trying. Like I brought it back to the States for myself. It's like, okay, like, can I do it in a little extra Step. And, like, is that extra step, like, amplifying, like, helping me?
Right, right.
I always think of the. Your comfort is going to eventually create discomfort, and then vice versa. Your discomfort is going to create comfort. So when I'm going to the gym, I know that, okay, this is going to be really hard for me, but I know that I need to be in that discomfort because I'm pushing myself. I'm going to make myself better with regards to going walks or doing those little things that may not seem make a difference. But day in, day out, if you create too much comfort, you're eventually going to get to that discomfort.
It also creates that mental strength too, because you tell yourself, no, I can do this. And you follow through and you put more trust in yourself next time. Like, now, I did it last time, I can do it again. And it builds up your stamina for conquering things that are considered more difficult.
And then not everything's handed to you. And, like, don't be afraid to ask for help and look at the mansion and get happy. And like, the mansion could be not a mansion. Your mansion could be a family of six. Your mansion could be, you know, making.
Your own work schedule.
Making your own work schedule. Your mansion could be like a condo in a skyrise in Manhattan drinking martinis. Everybody has a different quote, unquote mansion. Go for it.
Well, I think another biggest, a big thing, too, people are very afraid to do is fail. I feel like we've failed consistently.
Yeah, guys fail. Like I always say, I hope you fail.
Yeah.
You know why?
Can you give us a good example?
Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Okay, so let's say that I love failure, and I do. I failed at so many things in my life and, like, I'm happy to write a book about it. I'm so open about it. And let's say you're afraid of failure, Right? By the time you pull the trigger to launch whatever it is, I've already failed five times. I've already done the research. I already know what works and what doesn't work. So I'm going to be five times ahead of you than when you start first because you're afraid of failure.
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See full terms@mintmobile.com because what would you say that when. What would be considering failing? Like, especially in this industry, they're not seeing any traction on their videos or what is their mentality of.
Especially in the beginning.
Yeah, well, number one is what are your goals? Right. Like we said that from the beginning. What's your. Why? What are your goals? You need to be very calm. What your goals are not like, I want more followers. No, how many more followers do you want? Do you want 5,000 this year? Do you want 10,000 this year? Like, what does that look like? Oh, I want to make more money. What does that look like? Do you want to make $5,000 more this year? Do you want to make a million dollars more this year? Do you want to do that by hiring help? Is that with like full blown company or is that what you take? So, number one, what are your goals? And if you fail? Congratulations. You started like, right? Yay. Like, absolutely. I hope you fail. Like, if you never fail, you're not in business. Like, you're just not. So you didn't get to the 5,000 followers that you wanted at the end of the month. Okay, let's do research. What happened? What? And guess what? Maybe 5,000 isn't attainable. Let's bring it down to a thousand was too high. The goal was too high. But fail, like, please fail, fail, fail, fail, fail, fail. The biggest entrepreneurs that I've worked with are the ones that constantly fail and pivot. Fail, pivot. This wasn't for me. Let's pivot. This wasn't for me. You don't look back. You move forward and you move forward. The same fearlessness of like, okay, I may feel in that as well.
Yeah. And I think that's what with the podcast. I've had a couple friends reach out and just be like, oh, podcasting is so much work. Are you guys like really ready for it? And I mean, we have realized how much work it is. Just like we, I don't think we knew how much it was, how much work. I mean, we like, slight idea.
I told you guys. I'm like, are you guys sure you want to do this with all the pets? And you're like, yeah, yeah. You guys are very set.
Yeah. So for us, the mindset has been like, we are going to do this, like very consistently every week. We will not miss an episode and then we can reevaluate. I love having the conversations on here, just the ones we've had so far. For me, it feels like a success, even though it's like, we just started.
Yeah.
So you have to, I think, having your goals behind it and your why.
Yeah. And not everything's gonna be a financial success.
No.
Like, I had my podcast a couple of years back, and to this day, I have people like, oh, my God, Italy. I love listening to it. And that was. I mean, I stopped because of time. That was just literally it. My energy was being focused elsewhere. And that's a decision, a professional decision I made. But the, like, my thing was never. I'm. My podcast was never to make money. Could that be an outcome? Sure. Would I accept that outcome? Yes, please.
But 1,000%.
Yes. But where I always came from is like, this is free information. Right. Because my online courses, there's a price tag. Because my private clients, there's a price tag. I wanted information to be inclusive. So the podcast was. And is that space. It's still up. And I now, like, on my website, I have my free resources, I have my journal. So for me, it was never like, oh, man, like, did I get that many views or did it. No, it was just about educating and, like, success will always, like, compound. Right? Like, you'll double up through the time and, like, you'll learn yourself.
I have been loving the feedback from our financial, talking about our budgeting, and it's so basic in our head because we've been doing it for so long, but just having these little conversations on here and even just having a little bit of that feedback, that's been super motivating for me to be like, I want to keep doing. And I felt like this when we first started our blog. When I get those little comments of like, wow, I love, you know, those little wins. And it, like, keeps your. Keeps you motivated with the why behind it.
Yeah, you guys are doing a great job. Yeah. Like, what else?
Make sure to leave a five star review and a comment.
I did.
I know.
Did you read Tyranny?
Yeah.
Yeah. Sweet.
Should I read her review?
Oh, my God, please do. Because I wanted to be very heartfelt because I know the inside of you guys. Like, I know the inner workings of your business and the family, and I know what you guys are like, putting out into the world. And people always ask me, like, are they really like that? I'm like, yes.
Like, what do you think is the biggest misconception about us? Can you share anything?
Yeah, maybe that like, won the lotto. That you won the lotto, right?
That we won.
That you're an asshole. No, no. I think the biggest misconception is that maybe that you guys don't work as. No, I don't know. Because I think people know that you're hard working. I think that it's like, is you are. Is your life really like that? Do you really go to the park with your kids? I see.
Okay.
Do you really, like, is Jaden like, are you really that involved with your kids?
It's not, like, content moments. It's more of, like, us living and then the content kind of just organically.
Those are the questions I get. It's like, but are they really, like. Or are they doing it for the Gram? I'm like, no, the gram just happens to be. Be there. Like, gram. Is that like, they really, like, they are a legit couple. They have a beautiful family. They walk the talk. Like, what. What you guys are saying you guys actually do. And that is so hard to find in today's business and, like, industry. Like, people that just, like, walk the talk. Like, you got. Like, if you say that you're going to do something, you actually do it and you stand by your word. Like, you guys, like, when you say, this is going to happen or we want this to happen, you will follow through that.
Follow through.
It just. It speaks to your success, though.
Thank you, Dalia.
This one is from Adalia Salsamende. I've been working with Brady and Anthony for almost a decade now, and if there's one thing they are, it's real.
Yeah. Capital R, E, A, L, capital R.
This is a couple and family that really strive to excel in all things in life in such a thoughtful, caring, and productive way. This podcast really shows what their mission is to ensure everyone has a chance to live the long game. Oh, I love how you added that in.
Thank you. Right? Yeah.
So, yeah, we will. Your goal. This is a nice one. This is from Katie Marie G. November 3rd. I followed your family on TikTok for a while now, and I've always been inspired by you. I discovered your podcast over the weekend and I've already binged every episode. Feeling even more inspired now and cannot wait for Thursday to hear your episode. Thank you for sharing your insights and experiences with us. Keep it up. It is so helpful in expiring. Thank you, Katie.
But even, like, when you guys came to me, you're like, okay, we're thinking about doing this. I was like, okay, why? Well, because we just want to educate our audience about our lives and health and wellness. And I thought to myself, okay, well what's the business behind it? And you know, like what, like what's the why? What's the end game? And what I loved about you guys is that you're like, actually this is going to be open ended where this is not about making a paycheck, this is not about pr. This is not about anything other than we just want to share our story and we want to help our audience beyond what to wear today. And I don't know any other fashion content creator that is doing that. That's just saying, yeah, like I'm cute and like I have fashion and we've traveled the world and we work with every brand of the sun. But like you're going to get to know a little bit more about us, our struggles, how we got out of debt, like how we were raising our family, like maybe resonates, maybe it doesn't, but let's see.
Yeah, let's just have.
And I actually love that for you guys because for the first time that I've met you guys, you were jumping into something with the wholehearted intention of we just see where it goes. Well, let's see where it goes and.
Let'S just help, right?
Let's just be like, let's let people know who we are and what we're really.
And I feel like we were missing that with the blog and before and we had the newsletter and I would write what I was thinking and we would.
There was a year where we helped people, you know, develop a website. We, it was very much teaching and tutorials and yeah, that I, we missed out. Really enjoyed doing that because you do hear about people that started it. And then a couple years later like.
We went to the LTK conference in Dallas and someone came up to us and she was so sweet. She said, I bought your course back in 20, 2016, 2017. Like it helped with my Instagram. And she's like, I, I really learned so much. I'm like, wow, that is insane to me. And I'm like, that was so nice. Thank you so much for saying that because I miss that educational part of it that we were so. We loved doing.
And I feel like now is a great time to start the podcast because it's just, we've have 10 years, just not in this industry but as a family. There's different aspects of our life and things that we've implemented and I don't think we could have done that five years ago.
It's just like right in the head of it. No, no, no, no. You guys were in the throws. That's come a long way, kids. Kudos.
Where do you see social media going? I know there's a lot of theories about, is Instagram gonna be there forever? TikTok, is there gonna be another platform? What do you see in the horizon?
You have to look at the history of entertainment, right? When it was radio, TV came on, and it's like, okay, well, is radio still gonna last? And when TV came on, it was black and white. Well, how's color going to change it? And then, you know, you had silent films, you had films that with sound, right? Then you have social media, Then you had Facebook and MySpace. Then you have social media, you had Instagram, then you have TikTok, and then you have, you know, X, Y, Z. Everything is always an evolution of its predecessor, and the predecessor will always remain right. Or at least now, until history remains. We still get in the car and we listen to ads on the radio. We still watch tv, maybe in a different capacity, but the TV set is still on, right? So whatever happens next from social media, it will evolve in its own natural timing and space. What I will say is that if you do want to be an early adopter and if you do want to make this a business, you need to jump on that bandwagon sooner than the rest, than the other folk. So what do I mean by that? If. And you did a great job with this on TikTok, right? Like, when TikTok started blowing up, and mostly because of COVID in 2020, what I particularly like something that I did with my private clients, I'm like, get on it, get on it, get on it, get on it, get on it. Go, go, go, go, go. Everyone listens to me except one. Now, that person is not.
You're like, sorry, told you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, but that's a decision that they made, and I had to respect their decision. Like, their eggs were put on another basket. They were like. And it is what it is. Like, I can only lead a horse to water, right? So being early adopters and understanding, like, how much energy are you putting into that and what do you want the outcome to me, and also understanding that maybe that doesn't last that long. That's okay. It goes back to the feeling, right?
So you played with lemonade for a little bit, and I was like, there's.
That other one, too, where everyone could get. There was that app where you can. Clubhouse.
Oh, Clubhouse. That you could.
That one's still.
Yeah, that One's still around.
So I think you have to enjoy the app that you're on though if you're not like loving it. I feel like that's hard to stay consistent if you're not even consuming the content for sure.
And understanding like where like the industry is going and if you really want to be like business oriented, like what I tell my private clients is like, okay, where? And that's where, like my brand consulting. Where are the marketing dollars coming from? Are they going? And I mean, really looking at it, right? Is it radio ad space? Is it TV ad? Is it editorial? Print world? I came from the modeling world. I worked at an agency for four years. So like my background is traditional print advertising. And then you have digital marketing. Digital marketing is then split up into Facebook, TikTok, Instagram. Right now these are those, those, those are the three major platforms. Where's the money going over? Like, I can break this down into a science.
What are brands? When you speak to them, what are they? Their marketing dollars coming from traditional advertising that are going to digital media.
Yeah, A lot of the traditional advertising dollars are now going to digital media. And doesn't necessarily mean influencers. It just means that the ads could.
Be celebrities, no celebrities.
Or it could just be like full blown ads. So you still have your model ads. Yeah. You have your native ads that are now just on digital media. Yeah. And it's, I mean, I love those conversations. So again, that's like some educating yourself.
Right?
It goes back to everything. Educate yourself.
What other conversations are you having with brands as far as what they see? Like, are they. Do you see this going more in that direction?
Yeah. So I guess for clarity, my agency does influencer strategy. So that's where like I work with you hand on hand. And, and I also do brand strategy. So I do a lot of influencer casting for their campaigns. I guide them the same way that I guide influencers and just building up the businesses. Right. So I look at everything from a business point of view, whether you're an influencer or brand. So that context being said, brands have to really, the future of what I'm seeing of digital marketing is that because there's so many influencers, there's so many content creators. It's not so much like what makes you stand out because I think like we're all snowflakes and each one of us are unique and different. I really do actually believe in that. But who are the people that, number one, are authentic to the brand? Like, I think it's the less is more Strategy, like instead of like, you know, throwing it up and see who salutes, it's really focusing in on what makes sense for this. The creator story, I think means a lot. And depending on where the brand is in the spectrum of their target audience, we can skew more towards entertainment. So those are more the gen zers, a lot more dancing, a lot more fun versus a more educational aspect. You know, maybe a beauty line that is, you know, targeting 35 to 45 year olds. That's going to be more educational. Right. So you still have like this elevated content. Everything's beautiful. But you're talking from a more educated point of view. It's really understanding who your audience is and really, really getting down to who are the content creators that can speak the message. And by the way, and this is like the most amazing part, that people with 5,000 followers are getting the same opportunity as people with 5 million followers. I mean, and you know this because like you are on the upper echelon of that spectrum and sometimes you do see brand trips and there are people that just started off so opportunity is ripe. Like this is the right place and time to really find your niche, be authentic and like really show that on social media so you can move forward from like a business point of view. Yeah.
Just need to start. That's the issue.
How do you recommend someone find their niche if they're like, I love all these things, like, I don't want to be a niche.
Yeah, you could be everything for sure. And there's a lot of crossover. I mean, I was just talking to somebody in an exploratory context.
What would my niche be? Do I have a niche?
Yeah. I actually talk about you, my influencer. How to, how to kickstart your influencer career. You're actually an example.
Take the course.
Yeah.
What, what do you say?
I say that you're fashion, your family and your well being. Yeah. But the three verticals intertwine.
Beauty is actually my biggest category right now.
Which is great.
Is it? Yeah. I've really leaned hard into the beauty space.
Yeah.
I don't do as many tutorials, but I'm very. I love beauty products.
Yeah.
But I feel like a creator that does just beauty. Eventually that's gonna.
You do fashion too?
Not do fashion, but people are gonna be like, oh well, I saw her do this lip thing. Or I. It's like almost the same content, but not. But then people are going to want to know more of that person.
Yeah.
Wait, so you're saying like if someone just does beauty, like yeah.
Like say they just do hair and then every day they do a different hair tutorial. I feel like eventually there needs to be.
Oh, like there's no personality behind.
Exactly. For me personally, I think I would get a little bit bored seeing the same thing. Oh, it's just another hair tutorial. Another hair tutorial. Like eventually we're going to want a little bit more.
I follow a few people about like I want to grow my hair out. So I'm following their, their TikToks about like the hair oil they're using, but they're, I literally don't know anything besides them about their hair. I really like those creators though. Like I don't need to know what time is.
Like there's, there's a beauty community that's really, really only beauty and like they just stick to that now when like, I don't know, to the red carpet they'll like dress super cool and like fashion will come into play.
But I don't know this person outside of like she doesn't share anything besides like her hair.
Yeah.
So I don't, I couldn't tell you anything else.
And that's a business move. And that goes back to what's her why because maybe she's getting those dollars and she's reinvesting it into crypto and real estate and you know, she has a five year exit plan. Like it's, that's why context is so important in this content creation business. Because it re it like what's your why? What's the end game? How are you allocating the funds to that? Like how are you feeding those funds? And do you boo. Like do you like you just want to do hair and you have your business strategy? Yes, I am for it.
We talked about this recently where it's very surprising because creators that I would think are doing this as a full time job really aren't. And it's very rare to be doing this to where you're supporting your family and making it a base where it's going to be a little bit more long term to where you're not quitting your job and crashing and burning. And what would you say for someone that is trying to get to the full time somebody?
It's interesting because I was talking to an exploratory call and she's like, okay, I want to make this my full time job. And I said, okay, well how much are you making your current job? And this particular person makes more than the average human being.
Oh, you're like, well just like let's stay with your regular job. Yeah.
I'm like, do you want to put your next.
I'm gonna start this podcast.
So she's gonna crack up. She's actually now a private client of mine after this. But she's like, I need to work with you, Idalia. But what's really interesting is that if you have a great full time job, you can use social media as like the cherry on top. You guys were very, very clear with your goals. You guys were also like, you guys were in the throes together. You came together for that. I think your story is a little different. I think people with full time jobs that are making decent money or like you can support yourself, like treat social media as a second time job with the same passion, the same energy, have that plan. Like how you guys did, like what does that mean? And guess what? Like if you have a great job and you can make X amount more because of social media, if you could do one brand trip, you know, a year, if you can get like the free bag that you really want, if you can make these connections that like really feed your soul, you may not have to leave your full time job. Like, right. That may not be the end game. The end game may be that you keep your full time job, you become president. Right. You have stock options, you lead a wonderful team, you're doing something better for society. And guess what, like now you're also making money on the side of social media. I don't think that the end game always has to be you have to quit your job and do social media. I think that's misinformation.
I think the people that would be saying that would be not happy in their job then, right? In their full time job?
I don't think so. I think it could be that they, they think that the end game has to be that they need to make social media their full time job.
But what it, what about the argument that they really don't have time to be fully present in both because that was the struggle that we were having is I, I liked my full time job.
Yeah.
I wasn't unhappy there, but I was also feeling very pulled to where I couldn't stay up super late anymore and do all these like you were coding late until 2am sometimes and we're like, something's got to give because like we're not sleeping enough.
I guess it just goes back to like, what is your why and purpose? Like is your purpose to be successful doing social media and is success equals doing it full time?
Yeah.
Or do you just want to do a little bit just to get the free stuff or the trips? You know, it's kind of.
And everybody's capacity is a lot different. Right. I have friends that work insane hours from 7 to 7 and they are like, idali, I can't go to the gym, I can't work out. And I also have friends that work insane hours seven to seven, have four kids and get up at 4 o' clock in the morning to work out. So what are your priorities?
Yeah.
And not what? I can't judge on your priorities. That's not up to me. I know what my priorities are. My priorities are exercise. My priority is mental health. Spaces. My priority is when I'm with my husband, like, the phone is down, we're fully present. My party is like when we're with family, my niece and nephews. My husband always says, the world ends when you're with your niece. And I'm like, because that is my time to be present. And even when I was with your kids, I think I pulled up my phone once because I needed a poppy proof.
Who does this? Her mom is obsessed with poppy.
My mom loves La Pop, but other than that, I really do try to be present.
Yeah.
So what's the why? What's the purpose? And like, just get to that. Like you, if you want to make it in anything in life, you're a perfect example of that. You lived in a studio, you had a kid, you were getting married, you want, you had a full time job. Anthony was coding, you guys weren't getting sleep. Your priority was very laser focused on what's the future. If your priority is like, Iralia, sleep is my priority right now, then that's your mission statement and you lead with that. But you always lead with your priority. And understanding your priority is going to change. Yeah, I'm 40 years old. Like, homegirl needs eight hours of sleep. Like I used to like anybody that knows me, Like, I was the biggest floozy. Like, I drank and I partied. Like my mom always said, like, you were a party girl. I'm like, absolutely. My priorities were freedom and experiencing life. And I wanted to meet people. Had moved to LA 12 years. Like life was very, very different. Now my priorities are like hanging out with like my niece and nephews and like playing hide and go seek. Let your priorities change your priorities. So again, context, like, are we asking this question from a 40 year old point of view? Do you want to be up until three in the morning coding? I don't know.
Right. But someone who's trying to do this while they're in school, then they have a different mindset because they have way more energy and they can do a ton of things and be at all.
The events, or they may have family struggles and they could be caring for a sick parent. And their priority is that that's where empathy also comes in. And unfortunately, people play different cards. So I think you need to allow yourself the grace within yourself, saying, maybe the time is not right now, or the opposite. Like, dang, you know what? Like, actually, like, thank God everybody's healthy. Yes. Money is down right now. Yes. I'm tired, but, you know, like, I got two feet. Like, I could do it. Everybody's situation is different, and we have to be gracious towards each other. Like, I allow myself a lot of grace. I feel like in business, if you allow yourself grace, not playing the victim mentality, but you give yourself grace and you. You work hard and you have your priorities. Like, I. The universe will open the doors. And you take one step. Like Bemoan said, the light in front of you is what illuminates. All you gotta do is just one step and one step, and you're on this grand staircase, and you don't know where you're going, but you're going up.
Yeah, I love that. You can also be going down, depending on what steps you take.
Yeah.
And I hope you do.
No, but that's where.
Oh, here?
No, but that's where failure comes down. Yeah, there's. Do you guys watch the Diplomat?
No.
Okay, well, so it's great.
And is that a series or is it a movie?
It's a series. And it's with Carrie, because we actually know Carrie with the. She used to be on, like, that CW show.
I know the Carrie. Yeah, yeah.
Curly hair, the Babysitters club.
No. Yeah, she was. So it's called the Diplomat. Carrie is a diplomat. She's based in London and she's American. And she brings her husband, who used to be a former diplomat. So it's a political family, kind of like house of cards moment. And she always says that her husband fails. She. She fails up.
Oh, I love that.
And I looked at Danny and I go, oh, my God. Like, I'm gonna take that. I love failing up. Right. So, like, when you said, oh, like, what happens if the staircase goes down? Well, if you're looking down, you're going down. If you're looking up, you're still failing up.
Right, right.
So you see him in the show, like, really just make constant mistakes. Although he's trying to get. It's always for something good or what he thinks is good.
Okay.
And at one point she's like, you don't get it. My husband fails up. Like, he doesn't get that he fails because every time he fails, he always.
Says he's like a positive mindset.
He always says that a no is a stop sign to success.
Do you think there's a thing of toxic positivity? Because there's that whole conversation right now where it's like you're telling yourself. You're telling yourself.
Are you delusional?
Like, building yourself up so much. Yeah.
Building yourself up. Or you're telling yourself, like, oh, I'm the best I can be. I'm doing the best. But really you're, like, not doing the best.
Yeah. Is that the ego talking or is that your authentic self talking?
Yeah. I don't know, to be honest. But it's like this whole talking point of, like, are you doing the best you can?
But maybe it has to be followed with action. So it's like, okay, am I really doing what I'm supposed to be doing or really being the best I'm supposed to be, but still being the same?
You said in the gym, you know, that you're getting an exercise when it hurts a little. If life doesn't hurt a little. Like, if you're not a little scared.
Yeah.
You're not. You're not going to be advancing. That's like, that's it. So I think the positivity. The positivity. I'm number one. Like, I stare in the mirror. I have my affirmations. Like, even coming to this podcast, I was very clear. I'm like, okay, what do I want to get out of this? What do I want Brittany and Anthony's audience to get out? Like, I was very clear with my intention before I step foot in that door. It was all very positive. And then my job is not to follow through with that.
Right.
So, like, you know, if you're drowning and you know, like, I'm doing the.
Best I can, but, like, I guess you just have to reflect to, like, is it the best you can? But, like, also having the balance of. Not, like, putting your goals too high so they're out of reach.
Yeah. And the only way you'll know that is if you fail, it all goes. Like, if you're. If the goal is too high and you're like, oh, crap, I overestimated. Okay, then bring it down and keep moving forward, Keep moving forward, keep moving forward. Like, eventually you're going to look back and be like, oh, my gosh, like, whoa, like, I made it here.
I love that. What? I don't even know what book I probably should have, like, references of what we read and then the quotes. But saying the year is going to happen regardless. Whether you change anything or not, it's going to happen. So if you want to be in a different spot, go backwards and plan how to get there, because the time is going to pass regardless.
It's crazy. I always write myself a letter. My. To my future self.
We were going to do that for our goals for 2025. Write the letter and then open it in 2026.
That's what I do.
Oh, I love that.
So I write. I write a letter. I write a letter to my future self, and then I write a letter to my past self. So my future self, I just say, like, hey, I'm. I'm fighting for you. Oh, my God, I'm going to tear up. But I'm always like, I'm fighting for you. Like, I'm going to do everything I can to be. I'm. I'm taking. I know who I want to be. Like, when I'm 50, like, I always knew. Like, my. My focus has always been very, very clear. How am I gonna get there? I don't know, But I'm on the right track. Like, I'm good. Like, it's a staircase moment. But I want my future self to look back at, like, Idali at 40 and be like, yes. So that way, like, I know the steps that I'm taking are correct. And I also want my. My past self to. I need to forgive my past self. I need to give grace to my past self.
Right?
And say, like, you were just a kid. It's okay. Like, you're doing better, right?
And using those lessons as a learning moment versus letting it just go to waste.
And like, what. What did I learn from it? And that's something I always take from any situation. And I always tell, like, either people that work for me in my company, like, if there's, you know, one of my colleagues, like, she'll make a mistake. She's like, I'm so sorry. I'm like, thank you, number one, for telling me. Number two, thank you for apologizing. What did you learn? Like, I don't. I will never. And I do this with myself. Like, I will never fault myself for a mistake unless I don't learn.
Unless you don't learn, because then it's. It's such a waste.
So if Something is constantly being repeated in your life, and you're complaining about the same thing because you haven't learned a lesson that I'm a firm believer in. So you got to listen, because God speaks.
The universe speaks for us with our being Christians. It's, oh, all these things are happening. Like, God's causing these things, or they'll be angry at God. And for me, it's like, well, he also allows free will. Does he want you to be a robot following him? Because he's making you do everything. So, yes, there's things that just happen because life is not fair. Nowhere in the Bible does it say, you will get exactly everything that everyone else gets. But it also talks about, throughout the struggles, you can be great. And, like, throughout all these hard times, there's coming out better. And not in the better of the, like, the worldly sense, but in the better of. You're holding on to God more at the end. You know where your comfort's coming from. You. Your confidence is more in him. So it's like bringing it back to the struggle and the learning lessons. It's. It can be for a greater purpose. And maybe you choose wrong things. There's some things that are happening to me because of my decision.
Yeah.
Like I'm reaping what I sow in some senses, not in everything.
There's a quote from Tony Robbins that's like. And he talks about his past with his mom, and that was not a healthy relationship. And he goes, I can either cry about my past with my mom or I can thank her. And he has a very bad story. Like, the fact that he said thank is when I mean extreme. It's extreme. And he goes, every negative thing.
He actually went to my high school. Did he? Yes.
Oh, my God.
It's like our Glendora High claim to fame.
That was so radical for me at the time because I was holding onto something in my past. I'm like, I could never thank that. I could never. And listening more and more to him, I now have the exact opposite. Because I've been put in situations in my life where I've had to really stick up for myself. And working in the talent and modeling world, especially in New York City, you're up against some characters, and I'm a 5 foot 2 little Latina woman. You never know. And I definitely don't want to play the female card and I don't want to play the Latino card. But there's definitely, there's, you know, there's this. You're in New York City. Everybody's like, you're a shark. You're a shark monster, and you're out for themselves. And if it wasn't for that past, I would not have the courage to speak up. Because I always said, like, if I can survive that, homie, you're like, you're nobody. You're no. Like, I know that I can survive anything with grace, with respect. Like, all of those things that my.
Parents taught me and those experiences of living through it and going through it.
And think about, like, all your, like, the major stories that you love, every single movie that you watch, every single novel that you read.
There's always a struggle right before the triumph.
There's always a struggle. Like, if you're not. Like, make your struggle into your success story, and it goes back to helping others. Like, how can that struggle story help others?
Yeah.
I think that's, like, the beautiful part of hearing everybody's story and especially people that I work with. It's always like, well, what are your struggles? Like, what? And sometimes they're financial, Sometimes there's family, sometimes it's genetic. Something there's. Everybody deals with, something like, we gotta.
Give each other, like, that compassion. Compassion.
We have to be empathetic. You have to be empathetic.
I remember before I got pregnant with Jaden, I was not empathetic to teen pregnancy. Like, I wasn't teen pregnancy. But I remember thinking, like, that. That that would never happen to me. And.
And it did.
And it did. And it humbled me real quick. I was just, like, going down the spiral of, like. I also didn't have compassion for people who found themselves in that situation. I was like, ugh, sucks to be you.
Right?
And just having this, like, flippant mindset about it. But then it happens to you. You're like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Now we're super compassionate about that. And we help. We help teen moms all the time.
Well, it goes back to, you know, God and why did God did this to me?
And again, I would have that struggle. I'm like, no, no. Like, you went outside the boundaries. Those boundaries would have protected me at the time. And so afterwards, I was more of like, I cannot believe I made that decision when I knew better. But then I felt like it really humbled me to the fact of, like, he's going to use this in my life for something bigger. And I have to believe that. I get really emotional talking about it. I don't know if I shared this before. I told you I was with Ford at the time, and I was doing. I Would do a commercial, like, some shoot things. I had gone to the shoot, and I didn't know where the shoot was. It was the last one I wanted to do because I really wanted to go to college. And they kept sitting me down and saying, like, you could go to Milan. Like, you could. Long story. But I was like, I don't want to do this. So, like, it's the last editorial, like, and then we can close out. And so I go to the shoot. Didn't know what it was about. And it was how to have life after a baby.
What?
Yes. And in Self magazine, I still have the magazine, and it was me. There was a little girl running around. Her name was Liberty.
Oh, my God, I have goosebumps.
I'm like, if I don't take this as a bigger, like, sign. Sign. And after that, I remember coming back from the shoot. I'm like, whatever happens, I'm not having the abortion. I'm just gonna move forward. I'm gonna trust God that he's gonna make a bigger thing of this in my life. But just having the. Like, I'm gonna go through it, though. Like, I'm gonna literally have a baby. And I don't. I don't even want to be with the guy at the moment. Like, I had already broken up with him. And going through that, being, like, I don't even know if I can f. Mentally or physically do this. That time in my life, being pregnant and, like, Jaden, our little relationship is just like, I. I would not be where I am today without her.
Your story is so. It's so special, and it's so. You know, you were able to take something that you thought at the moment was negative, and you turned it to something positive. And the fact that you decided to go through with it and march forward, and obviously, Anthony came into the picture and, like, something came from it.
Going through the struggle, it really did make me a better person. And so, like, that's what I. When I think about, like, that was a really hard time in my life. That was, like, some of the biggest learning lessons I also learned during that time.
You were able to take, like, what you were saying, victim mentality of, like, oh, my God, how am I gonna do this? And you moved it forward. There's a quote that I love that says, I've never seen a wild thing feel sorry for itself. That's so true. I always, like, I decided then and there, like, I was going to be a wild thing. You know, I was never going to feel sorry for myself.
And that's a big mentality shift too.
It's huge. And going back to safari, when you see an animal get hurt, like, when you physically see an animal, like, being half, like, eaten half alive, they will never die. Like, they will never give up. They get and they. And they. And they run. And I looked at my husband and go, how interesting as human beings, when we think that, like, 10% of us is, like, we give up on ourselves. You know, instead of saying, like, no, now it's the time to get up and run. Like, go run. Like, get it. Like, either go towards what you're or get away from, like, the danger that you're in. Like, get up and go.
I think sometimes people have hesitancy because they think, oh, I'm too old. Like, too old to start. And they think I should have done it when I was younger. It's like, even with investing, sometimes we think that we're like, we should have.
Started a while ago.
We missed the boat.
Have you seen Martha Stewart documentary?
No.
Homegirl was in judgment. Two years old. She came back, became best friends with Snoop Doggy Dog. Granted, like, Homegirl had money, she had connections. Like, let's not forget, like. But she could have easily thrown herself in a hole of despair and shame and not move forward. And, you know, and I, I started crying. I'm like, I don't know if, at 62, if the whole world hated me. I don't care how much money I have. I don't know if I could have, like, dug myself out of that hole.
Homegirl dated the mentality shift.
You have the mentality shift. 62 years old, she's like, now, like, what? She's on the COVID of Sports Illustrated, I think it was, or GQ for her.
You gotta start. You gotta have purpose. You gotta have consistency. Work your butt off.
I mean, and learn from your mistakes.
And. Yeah, and fail.
Yeah, please fail. I always say, I hope you effing fail. Everybody that I work with, I think it's like the biggest, like, cold water to their face. I'm like, I'm afraid. I'm like, I hope you haven't need a T shirt. Yeah. And they're like, how can you say that? Like, you're like, you're my mentor. You're my strategist. I'm like, yeah. Like, that's what you pay me for. The truth. I hope you fail.
Yeah.
You're going to learn so much and have so much fun.
Tell where we can find you on.
Oh, thanks. So my Instagram is my full name. It's a little hard, but Idahlia Salsamendi I D A L I A you'll find me. And my website is Idahlia Inc. So it's my first name. I D A l I a inc.I.
N c.com thanks for tuning in. If you found any value in this episode, we'd love if you share it with a friend or leave us a review. It really helps us. And as always, don't forget to subscribe so you don't miss any of our upcoming episodes. New episodes drop every Thursday on Apple and Spotify. Until next time, thanks for listening to the long game. See you next week.
This is Gracie Norton from the Wellness Her Way podcast, the ultimate sanctuary for a welcoming approach to wellness. It seems like every day there's a new food we're not supposed to eat, a new cleanse to take part in, or a new workout that claims to give us a flat stomach within a week. Rather than hopping on trends, we're going back to the roots of wellness and making a home of our body, mind and soul. If you're seeking physical growth, emotional abundance, or simply a more fulfilling life, tune in to the Wellness survey podcast on November 6th. Get ready to embrace your body through all its forms and get back to the roots of wellness.
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