BUILT for Impact Ep. 5: How Your Self-Image Shapes Your Success

What if the biggest limit in your life isn't your circumstances, it's your self-image? Not your talent, not your strategy, not your timing, but the internal picture you hold of who you are. You can't outperform the way you see yourself. That's why some people seem stuck at the same income, same patterns, same emotions, no matter how hard they work. It's not your effort that changes your life, it's your identity. Welcome back to the Built for Impact podcast. I am Jake Burhans, and this is a podcast where inner peace meets high performance and where building your dream life starts from the inside out. Today's episode, we're going to dive into one of the most powerful forces in personal growth. It is self-image. Okay, this isn't just psychology, right? It's really like an energetic blueprint that sets your ceiling for your reality or your thermostat. And when you change how you see yourself, everything else in your life starts to raise to meet that vision. There's a lot of work in the field on self-image psychology that you can dive into. Uh, the great Maxwell Maltz has a really good book called Psycho-Cybernetics, which I think is one of the best books to read in regard to all this manifestation and self-image. But the foundation of that book is this self-image psychology and how that sets the tone for everything in your life, all the results. So the first point to, to understand here is that self-image sets the you're never going to outperform your own self-image of who you see yourself to be. Maxwell Maltz said it best, you will act like the sort of person you conceive yourself to be. If you see yourself as a $100K per year person, right, you're going to unconsciously sabotage anything beyond that. If you see yourself as someone who's not confident, you'll hold back in conversations or sales. You can only really receive and maintain what your identity feels normal. You can't receive what you don't feel safe holding, right? So upgrading that inner thermostat, what does that mean? Well, if I want to be a speaker, right, let's say a world-class speaker. If I see myself as like an okay speaker, I might attract, you know, small meetup gatherings, speaking events, and I might feel safe doing that. But if I don't see myself as a world-class speaker, I'm going to get bigger opportunities to go speak on big stages, but I'm going to tell myself, no, I'm not ready to do that yet, right? Because my own self-image is someone who is not at that level yet, right? So my own, my own self-image is the only limiter of those circumstances. If I see myself as the biggest speaker in the world, speaking on the biggest stages in literally stadiums, nothing is going to be too big for me, right? And I'll be able to step into that opportunity. But it makes complete sense, right? You gotta set the self-image for who you want to be. Who do you want to be? See yourself as that person, as that killer salesperson, as that person in a beautiful relationship, whatever it is. See yourself as that person. Start acting like them. And then eventually everything starts to conform around you. But if you don't see yourself as the version of you that you want to be and you don't truly believe that you are that person, you're going to self-sabotage opportunities as they come into you because you're not going to feel worthy, right? It's like your inner thermostat. If your thermostat's on 55, right, more opportunity comes into your life, right? It rises to 65, 70, but your thermostat brings it back down to 55, right? So you have to raise your thermostat or your, or your self-image of yourself. Right? You have to tell yourself, you know, if you're telling yourself that you're bad at relationships or you're not good at business or you're okay at sales or you're really not that good at talking to people or these things always happen to you, that's the self-image you're creating for yourself. And subconsciously, you're always going to get those results, right? So it all starts with upgrading how we see ourselves. I call this creating the 2.0 version of yourself. You got to create Jake 2.0, right? Jim 2.0. Very, very important. The subconscious is seeking consistency, right? So the subconscious mind, and we'll talk more about the subconscious mind, but the subconscious mind basically governs 95% of all your behaviors, your habits, your thoughts, all that. It's like the computer program that runs on autopilot behind the scenes. So all of this work is about reprogramming your subconscious mind. And when I talk about your thoughts, right, you think new thoughts, that rewires your brain. And then it sends new chemical signatures to your body and it rewires your body. When your body is set to a new baseline, a new baseline energetic, you know, state, that is basically the subconscious below the conscious mind that has been reprogrammed, right? So if you can get your computer program running on a baseline frequency of peace, love, joy, whatever it is, that's most of the work, right? So your subconscious is very powerful and I'll need to do an episode on that. But the subconscious is the thermostat. It keeps your life consistent with who you think you are. So you can grind and you can affirm and you can visualize all you want, But if your true identity, who you believe yourself to be, says this isn't me, it's gonna pull you back, right? If you say, oh, I want to be this world-class speaker, but you don't feel like you are a world-class speaker because you don't think you're a good communicator, or you think that you're gonna get stage fright, right? You are gonna subconsciously, below the conscious mind, you're not gonna realize it, sabotage yourself in ways that won't allow you to speak on stages. Maybe an opportunity will come and you'll say, well, no, I'm busy actually. I have something else to do that's more important today. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, right? So it'll come in a way that's kind of sneaky, and you might justify it to yourself, but subconsciously you're not taking that opportunity because you don't feel confident enough. You don't have the identity of someone who can step into that role. So the subconscious mind always works to create alignment between your inner and your outer world, right? So if your inner world isn't, you know, at that level, it's gonna, it's gonna bring the thermostat back down. So you don't need more effort, right? It's all about inner alignment. That is the biggest thing. Thirdly here is that your behavior flows from identity. So every behavior you take comes from how you see yourself. If you see yourself as disciplined, the gym is natural, right? If you see yourself as a healthy person, right, you're always going to be healthy. I used this example the other day. I was like, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a healthy person, right? I take my health very seriously. I see myself as a healthy person, right? So if I were to start gaining weight, a little bit of weight, I would instantly go on a little bit of a diet. I'd increase my, my gym time and I would get back down to a good weight because that's just the identity I see myself as, right? So no matter how much like junk food I'll eat here or there, I always revert back to my identity as a very healthy person who's in shape, who goes to the gym and does these things. So it's very easy for me, right? No matter how much, like I said, no matter how far I get off the track, subconsciously I'm always reverting back to these healthy habits because that's how I see myself. So you want to program your thermostat to this high state or program it to the state that you want to be, right? Like, I'm good at relationships, I'm good at business, I make a lot of money, I'm healthy, right? I am at peace. Have that be your thermostat. So yeah, you're going to get off track, but if that's who you actually believe yourself to be, you're always going to revert back to those states. If you see yourself as confident, sales is going to flow easily. If you don't see yourself as confident, sales is not going to be easy, right? If you don't believe yourself to be good at sales, if you don't truly think that you're good at this role,, it's going to be hard to show up and be confident and get good sales, right? Your behavior is going to be, well, you're not going to jump on the new leads right away because you're not as confident. You don't feel like you're going to be able to close them. Whereas someone who sees themselves as really good at sales, they're going to jump right on the new leads, right? And they're going to be all over them on the phone, talking and pushing for the close and doing all the things. And to another point, if you see yourself as unlucky in love, right, you attract partners that, that reflect that belief. Try to change your behavior without identity. It's just like painting over moles, right? That's a great example. So you have to remove that stuff. You need a better foundation. So who do you believe yourself to be in XYZ area of your life? It's very, very important. Furthermore, expectation is magnetic, right? You don't get what you want, you get what you expect. So if you're expecting certain things, you're basically in alignment with already being that version of yourself. If you want to be a world-class speaker, and an opportunity comes along for you to speak in front of 10,000 people, but you are expecting that opportunity, you're going to step into that with ease. You're not even going to question it. If you're a killer salesperson and you expect to close the sale, you're going to jump right on the new leads. You're going to get on the call. And when that golden opportunity is right in front of you to slam dunk, close the deal, you're not going to falter because you're already expecting to close the deal. So expectation reflect your identity. What you expect is a reflection of who you see yourself as. If you expect to have good relationships and you expect to be healthy and you expect to get the sales and you expect to get money, when that stuff flows into your life, you're not going to self-sabotage it because you already see yourself as a person who holds those things, right? So self-image sets that expectation. When you expect good things, you show up with energy that magnetizes those opportunities because you're already in that state of receiving, right? It's like the gratitude of already having it. That's a signal to the universe that you already have it. So it comes to you. Expectation changes your tone, posture, energy, actions, everything. Like, think about that, right? If you're trying to go for the sale and you expect it to already be closed, you're going to have a nice, calm, positive tone. You're going to be sitting up. You're going to have a lot of energy. You're going to be excited because you're literally about to close a deal and you're going to act confidently and you're going to do the right things. So expectation is huge. What are you expecting in your life? That's what I want you to ask yourself. Today and every day, what do I expect in my relationships and my wealth and my health and my business and my life? Like, what am I expecting? Because you're getting what you expect, what you expect. And if you examine this, what you currently expect is probably in alignment with who you see yourself to be, what your current self-image is. So you basically train the world how to treat you through your own self-image. It's no different than me wanting to be an entrepreneur, right? I had to see myself every time that I was scaling up the acquisition side of the business. I started out cold calling. I had to see myself as lead manager, right? Because I was just cold calling, following up with leads and closing leads. For me to scale up and build that team, I had to see myself as a closer before I was. So when I was a cold caller, I had to see myself as a closer and start to operate from that identity. And once I was like, oh, I'm a closer, I'm like, well, I don't cold call anymore. I'm a closer. So then I go buy— I go get cold callers, hire cold callers, and hire lead managers to set appointments for me because my identity was now a acquisition rep. And then when I wanted to go hire an acquisition rep, I had to change my identity to, well, I'm a sales manager. I'm not a closer, right? So as soon as I believed myself to be a sales manager, I'm like, what am I doing closing deals right now? I should have a team closing deals for me. And that's when I went and hired salespeople. And same thing now, as I'm getting up into more of a C-suite position, it's like, I'm not a sales manager, right? I'm an owner. I'm an owner. So then the second I believe that I'm an owner, I'm like, what am I doing in the sales management seat, right? And now I'm not sabotaging opportunities. As people step up and wanna go into that role, I'm ready to hand it off, right? Because I don't see myself as a sales manager anymore. So you're always upgrading your own self-image. And again, as you upgrade your self-image, you're getting into higher and higher energetic states. Understanding the nervous system and how the nervous system is always trying to protect you is a super important thing. Many people are resisting certain levels of success or love or abundance, not because they don't want it, but because it doesn't feel safe, right? Your nervous system protects your current self-image. So when you get that opportunity to go speak on a really big stage, but you don't see yourself as that prominent of a speaker, your nervous system— you get fear, right? Fear and anxiety is what happens. And your nervous system is like, whoa, that is— we are not used to that. That is way too big, right? So it's protecting your current self-image of being this smaller speaker. And again, it's going to sabotage that opportunity. So you got to rehearse the new identity in your mind to make that success feel safe in your body. So the nervous system is huge. The nervous system acts like a barometer between the energetic field. I don't know if that's— not a barometer, but just, uh, it's like a bridge between the energetic field and the physical world. So when these opportunities flow into your life that are, you know, whether it's success or love or abundance or wealth or opportunities that are a higher energetic opportunity, but your body isn't conditioned to that level of energy because you're stuck in those lower level energetic states of fear, anxiety, worry, your nervous system, like it, it's like a surge of energy and it breaks your circuit breaker, which is your nervous system. You go into fight or flight, you go into fear, anxiety, panic, worry when that opportunity comes up, 'cause you're like, oh, I could never handle that, right? But you have to learn to comfort your nervous system and say, it's okay to be in this. Like, it's gonna be okay. So how do you do that? You do it in your mind, right? Because the brain doesn't know the difference between vividly imagining something and actually doing it. So if I'm trying to get onto the biggest stages, I need to visualize what does it feel like to be on that stage? 15,000 people looking at me, how do I feel? Right? Really get into it. And then you might feel panic at first, but as soon as— the more you start to do that every single day, right, you are in that situation of the 15,000 people. When you actually get on the stage in front of 15,000 people, it's going to be like nothing because you've already done it in your mind 100 times, 1,000 times. This is exactly what athletes do, Olympians, actors, speakers do it as well. They're always visualizing, right? Because your body does know the difference. So if you can visualize this future outcome that you want, this future version of you, and have your body feel safe in that energy, when that, when that opportunity actually comes in from the external world, you're not gonna sabotage it. You're gonna step right into it. So how do you upgrade your self-image? A little bit of a framework. So the first thing is define the next level of you, right? I like to call it Jake 2.0, as I had said before, Jake 2.0, right? Mark 2.0, Jim 2.0, Ashley 2.0. What is the next version of me? How do they think? Move, speak, lead? What do they believe about themselves? You have to go write that out. I want you to brain dump on a whole sheet of paper. Who are you? Jake 2.0. Boom. Every little thing, right? And I want you to dream without the how. I think that's huge too. I want you to imagine like you have just won the lottery. $300 million, okay, is sitting in your bank account. You have all the money in the world. What does your life look like across the 6 core domains? Right? What does your life look like in terms of wealth, health, relationships, creative expression, personal development, and purpose? Those 6 things. Those are the 6 domains of life, right? Dream without the how. What does it look like? What are you buying? What house do you live in? What car do you have? Right? Who, what kind of relationships do you have? Personal, romantic, professional, friends. What does all that look like? What are you doing for personal development? Dream without the how and don't tell yourself, well, I don't know how that would happen cuz you're limiting yourself. Go for the freaking moon. Go for Mars. Go for Jupiter with this stuff. Okay, so who do you want to be? You need— the second you write it down on a piece of paper, it gets so much more real. I promise you. And then once you have that written down, spend 5 to 10 minutes a day visualizing yourself being this version of you. And even if it feels fake at first, it feels like, oh, this is, this is stupid, right? That's okay. Keep doing it every single day and eventually it'll become more real to you. Just like the method actors who will— you're trying to get into a role of Santa Claus and you act like Santa Claus in real life so much, you, you know, some actors forget that they're actually Jake Burhans and they're not Santa Claus. But it's the same thing here. If you keep visualizing this over and over and over and over in your head, even if it feels weird at first, over time that'll become more real than anything in your external world. And that's exactly when the magic happens. And that's when the opportunities come in to bring that into your reality. So your subconscious learns through repetition and emotion. So remember that. Every time that you're visualizing that in your head, Hebb's Law, neurons that fire together wire together. So every time you're visualizing that new version of yourself and getting emotional about it, you're reprogramming your subconscious mind to this new reality. So repetition, it's a conscious choice every single day to come in and do that. Affirm the identity, not the outcome. So use affirmations. Those are— affirmations are huge. They're I am statements. And, you know, I am blank. I am this. I am that. I am a powerful communicator. I'm a man who always follows through. I'm a clear channel for abundance. I'm the kind of person who always figures it out. These things are very powerful. And again, it might seem silly at first and you might not believe it at first, but the more that you do it, the more you begin to believe it and the more you reprogram your subconscious mind. It's all done through repetition. Act in alignment daily. So you need to act in alignment with the new self-image. So if you want to be a, let's say, a killer salesperson and you're trying to reprogram yourself to be really good at sales, when that lead comes in that you would normally hesitate on, that new lead, or when that opportunity to go in and close a deal comes when you would normally be timid, you need to act in alignment with the new version of yourself. So you need to jump right into that call and be like, nope, I got this. This is great. I'm going to kill it. Let's get on the call. I'm excited for this call. This is awesome. I am going to help this person. We're both going to make some money and it's going to be a win-win situation. So if you're not acting in alignment with this new version of yourself, then you're never gonna get there, right? So every time that you take an action that is in alignment with this new version of yourself, it's like a deposit in the bank of the new self. So keep that in mind. Small congruent actions reinforce the new identity. So what would this version of me do today? How would he show up on this call? How would he respond to stress or setbacks? So always ask yourself that and then eliminate contradictions, right? So notice when your words, actions, or environment contradict your upgraded identity. So for example, saying like, I'm bad at tech or I'm not a morning person, surrounding yourself with people who only see you as the old you. Get out of those environments and then avoiding situations that stretch your confidence. So yeah, like you don't want to avoid these situations. You want to take action that's in alignment with them. So shift those patterns, show up as if you already are that next level self. And also reframing the past. This is a huge thing. So your self-image is really built on how you interpret the past a lot, a lot of times, right? Because in the past I wasn't good at sales. So in the future, I'm not going to be good at sales. But change the story, right? You didn't fail at business. You were becoming the kind of person who learns and wins, right? You didn't fail at sales. You were becoming the kind of person who gets really, really good at communication. You weren't bad at relationships. You were learning emotional maturity, right? When that story changes, the self-image can change instantly. It's like, don't— why are we carrying around this story that doesn't serve us, right? The familiar past is creating a predictable future. Change the story as to why that happened. Oh, that was a learning lesson. That was a growth lesson. Everything changes. So a little bit of integration here. As I've been saying, your self-image is the command center of your life. A couple journal questions is: what identity am I unconsciously living from? And then, who is the version of me that already lives the life I desire? Two questions there, right? So practice being that version in small ways this week. Walk differently, speak differently, think differently, right? Not to fake it, but to become it. So do the 2.0 exercise, Jake 2.0, and just brain dump, right? What does your life look like? Who are you? What are you doing? What do you have? What do you drive? Where do you live? What are you doing for work? You know, where do you travel? Just put it all out there. The second you put it on paper, it becomes so freaking real. In closing here, your life is always catching up to your self-image. It's the thermostat. Don't chase the outcome. You need to embody the new identity and everything else will come to you. This is the foundation of the built framework. When you break limiting beliefs, upgrade your operating system, you naturally imagine your new life because you no, no longer have those limiting beliefs. You have a nervous system that can handle it, right? You have a life loop that's operating in the, in the correct fashion, and you just transcend into your new self. If this episode resonated, share with a friend who's already, is ready to see themselves differently. And subscribe for more conversations on mastering your inner world. Until next time, all the peace, all the power.