In this improvised, comedic YouTube episode, host Jason Levin narrates a failed attempt to build an AI app that measures visual similarity between himself and his dog Ron, claiming an 83% match. After the app crashes, Jason and his co‑founder Jack abandon software and humorously pivot to a DIY biotech scheme: swabbing Ron’s DNA, selling the data to a fictitious Chinese buyer, and building a no‑code landing page to market the dog’s genetic material. The dialogue satirizes startup tropes—nepotism (“nepo‑baby”), reliance on Brex cards, Paul Graham’s “do things that don’t scale,” and rapid no‑code product launches—while peppering references to Elizabeth Holmes, 23andMe, and pop‑culture (Jimmy Neutron, Roller Coaster Tycoon). The sketch culminates in a mock negotiation with a Chinese interlocutor, absurd price haggling, and jokes about cloning, duck skewers, and selling human DNA. The tone remains irreverent, self‑deprecating, and deliberately over‑the‑top, using repetitive banter to emphasize the parody of startup hype and ethical shortcuts.
Chapters
So my wife said that my dog and I don't look alike, and I think we do. I mean, you can see our hair. So I built an AI app that compares an image of my dog Ron and a picture of me. All right, then says the similarity. Okay, so, oh, thanks Ron. So we just take a selfie of Ron right here. Fuck, it's not working, dude.
Bro, you told me this was gonna work.
Yeah, I tell you a lot of things, Jack.
We invested a week in making this happen.
Jack, you shouldn't believe everything I say, okay?
I'm falling. All right, so if we're gonna pivot Software doesn't work for us. We need to pick something way simpler.
Easier.
Biotech.
How hard can it be?
Biotech in a single day?
How? What do we do? The internet is huge. Biology, chemistry, small. Small atoms, small neurons, neutrons, Jimmy Neutron. We're good. We're good, Jack.
Jason, just tell me you have a plan.
I have a plan, Jack. Like I said, my mom works in pharma, which makes me a nepo baby for the pharma industry.
Okay, so So we go get medical supplies, we collect data from dogs, and then we— 23andMe, they sold all their information to the Chinese, but it's just the two of us, so we don't need to sell it to the Chinese. We just need to find a Chinese guy to sell our data to.
Yeah, we don't need a billion-dollar exit. All we need is the biomedical materials and to swab Ron's asshole, and we're good.
Wait, what?
If Elizabeth Holmes got her investors' cards, she would have never gotten sued.
She wouldn't have gone to jail.
Like, imagine this. Would you sue somebody who got you this card?
I've never sued anyone in my entire life. Really? I'm lying, I've sued everyone that I've ever worked with. Who's locking up toothbrush? These things are $9.99. Is that all we need?
Yeah, I mean, do you need anything else? We're scrappy, man. We're scrappy.
You're the biotech guy.
All we need are Q-tips and a Brex card. We're good to go. We just put it on the Brex. That's how startups are started these days.
Jason, we don't need spit.
This is perfect.
Collect the data. Bro, collect the data.
I'm collecting, Jack.
Don't throw that out.
Jack, it would be a lot easier to collect if I had a turn lamp. All right, that's how they do it in the pros. You didn't bring it.
That's not my problem.
Jack!
We just gotta swab him, right?
Alright, this is for data.
Come on, Ron, let me do this.
Ron, the Chinese need your data, buddy.
Alright, man, I know I was upset earlier, but I actually think this is gonna work. We got it. Alright, so do you know some place they would buy this?
Of course, I know many places, but we'll go to my favorite, okay?
So we're just, we're gonna go in here and see if they want the data?
It's worth asking, Jack. Kim.
Alright, well.
You got to do the things that don't scale, Jack. Paul Graham said it best. Yeah, they were extremely offended by my line of questioning.
All right, so the local investors did not like our pitch. So I'm thinking we use Create.xyz, which we can easily build our own software products and landing pages in under like 10 minutes using their no-code tool. So we're going to build this landing page. For Ron the dog. Should get set up in a couple seconds. Alright, so it's already building it right now.
So we're gonna be able to sell DNA off this landing page.
Whoa!
Oh my god, dude, that's impressive. Boop the snoot, that's a good button.
But once we— but I think we can send it out in a couple minutes.
So yeah, so just add DNA a few times, send it out across WeChat and Signal.
Yeah, all right, just sent it out.
Dude, you are so well connected.
Dude, dude, you're never gonna believe it. We already got a hit. This guy in China is like a rich son, like analyst of like a billionaire tech tycoon.
Yeah, like Roller Coaster Tycoon or real tycoon?
No, like Sweatshop Tycoon. All right, let's go nail this pitch. Okay, so here's the pitch. We've captured data from a dog.
Mm-hmm.
And we will sell you that data just like 23andMe, but instead of millions of people, You get one dog.
So in China, we have a lot of this kind of requests for dogs. Yes. So we can— what my business idea, because, you know, I'm American educated like you guys, capitalist, capitalist. Yes. So we— I'm thinking about we buy the dog data from you guys. Yes. And we clone it 1 to 2, 2 to 4, 4 to 8. Susan, Susan. Okay, "Oh, chua nhan ta." And then we gonna go make, you know, duck skewers, duck steaks.
Did you say dog scores? You're gonna score the dog of 1 to 10, right?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, you dumb American. No, no, no, I'm thinking about duck skewers.
You're gonna eat the dogs.
Eating is just like a concept. For us, it's more like we consume it. And then it becomes part of us, part of the whole Zen bullshit that you guys like to talk about, yes?
We'll sell to you for $40. Take it or leave it.
$20, how about that? $20, long-term relations, you know. $20?
$20, will you do it for $20?
Tariffs.
Okay, alright, $20, you have your deal. Deal.
Deal. Ah, Tai Hao, good friend, good. We say peng you in China. Peng? Friend, friend.
Pang Hyo?
Yes, yes, exactly, exactly. You good looking man. You look like, you know, JFK Jr. You look like JFK Jr. Oh, thank you.
We could sell his DNA too.
I love you.
Jack, can we sell your DNA?
Yeah, we can sell some. You want me to lick this?
Oh, I will get your DNA. Come on, a lot of Chinese men, we love your DNA.
Okay.
All right.
We'll send you the dog DNA via mail. Okay.
All right.
We'll be in touch. Thank you. It's good doing business with you.
We're just going to write to China, right? That's all we need. I thought they were going to love it. Yeah, I kind of had to book it for New York, man. I'm in Arizona right now.
Do you think the Chinese won't be able to find you in Arizona?
I hope not.
I mean, you're going down— are you going to cross the border into Mexico?
I will be laying low in Arizona. I'll be off the grid, grid, grid, grid, grid.
I think I'm gonna go try play poker with that guy at least and recoup back some of our money that we lost. He invited me to Macau.
