A satirical pitch for an app that alerts you when crypto bros are nearby by tracking their Coinbase transactions, so you can avoid them. The speaker jokes it would catch people pretending to be artsy while secretly buying Bitcoin, and mentions a friend on the actual Citizen team as proof it could work.
Free startup idea. You know Citizen, the app that shows you all the crime everywhere to avoid? Why don't they have that for tracking crypto bros so you know which part of town to avoid to avoid the crypto bros? You think all of them are located in the financial district, but they be hiding sometimes because sometimes they be some artsy motherfuckers pretending to be artsy, or really they're just NFT crypto bros. Like, wouldn't it be nice to know if those guys over there were crypto bros so I could know just to avoid them? But The point is you get a map, you get notifications when a crypto bro is walking near you. And the way to do this, obviously, is just tracking Coinbase purchases or whatever. My friend actually works on the Citizen team, so I'm going to text her to see if it's possible. They mainly focus on tracking murders and robberies, but I think tracking crypto bros and knowing how to avoid them is just as important or potentially more important.
