Two failed startup founders decide to cheat their way into Google interviews using a fake tool called InterviewCoder instead of learning to code. When asked about Quicksort's runtime in a mock interview, they give a nonsensical answer, exposing the absurdity of the scheme.
So Jack, what are we going to build today?
Dude, I don't think we should be building anything. Our apps are the dumbest thing of all time. We haven't made money in months. Like, I'm, you know, my trust fund's running out. We need to just like go get jobs.
So like, acquihire situation? We sell one of our startups?
Dude, who's going to buy one of our companies?
Google, dude. We built Duofucko. It's Google Translate basically just better.
You think Google is going to buy Duofucko.com?
Absolutely. I own the domain.
Okay, all right, well, what if instead of going to try and sell DuoFuckit to Google, we just try and go get a job at Google? They pay a lot of money. Like, what's the worst that could happen?
I don't know, we become comfortable. We get massages in the Google offices and we just get lost. All of our ambition is gone. We never build a silly startup again because there's so much red tape and we're just stuck at Google for the rest of our lives until we're 50 years old and banging Asian ladies. Do you really want that, Jack?
Yes.
I can't get insurance.
Like what?
Oh, you think Google's going to hire us?
Yeah, I mean, we have stacked resumes, we built viral startups. I mean, we literally built a better version of Google Translate. They're gonna hire us, dude. Our resume is cracked.
All right, I mean, I guess let's go give it a shot.
2 hours later.
Bro, that wasn't even a Google headquarters, that was a Google Store.
I thought we'd at least get you know, a boxing position, work our way up the ladder, you know?
Well, they were deeply offended we even tried. All right, so it turns out getting a job in big tech is way harder than I thought. You need a degree. Neither of us have degrees. Every fucking janitor at Google has a degree. What are we gonna do?
Dude, Silicon Valley was built by dropouts, and you're saying we can't get into any of FAANG, Google, whatever without a degree?
Yeah, because we're not starting companies anymore. We're getting hired by companies, and people who get hired need college degrees, apparently. We need to go back to school. We need to get a degree. I don't want to go back to school.
I did not like school, Jack. I didn't like it.
What was wrong? What was wrong with it?
The nuggies. The nuggies, Jack.
Well, I mean, you know, I'll—
The swirlies.
I'll protect you.
I'm in.
Okay.
What school? Where are we going?
There's only one that I can think of that's easy to get into for simpletons and actors like us.
Juilliard?
NYU.
I think this is NYU. I can't really tell with the cameras.
I mean, it said that it was on Google Maps, so.
Yeah.
But this doesn't look like a normal college campus, I'm gonna be honest.
It's really hard to get in here.
So maybe we should just go up and ask someone how the fuck they got in here?
That's not a bad idea, Jack. So, how'd you get into NYU?
I applied after grad school and here I am graduating.
What'd you study?
Uh, I did my master's in law.
So how do we get in? We're dropouts.
You're dropouts? You can always make it if you're Mike Ross. So I mean, just get the brains and you'll be fine. Okay.
All right. What about him? He can do it.
You've got the hair. You could do it. If you fake it a little with a nice briefcase. They have a modeling school here? They do. You could do that.
I'm in.
Do it.
That sounds perfect.
You'd do great.
Yeah, we're not getting in here, dude.
Dude, did you also see that it's $90,000? Do you know how much Bitcoin I'd have to sell to just afford to go here?
We are not going back to college. It is a retarded system. It is outdated. It is antiquated. It is stupid. Who needs it these days with AI, with Google, whatever, man? Like, there's not even gonna be any jobs by the time we're done with this. We're not going back to college, Jack.
Well, I mean, I agree, but I, I want to at least see what happens with NYU modeling.
Modeling? You really think you're going to pay New York City rent with modeling?
I mean, I might, I might as well try.
All right, well, I'm gonna do the whole coding thing, but it's fine because I'm a cheater. I admit it. I love cheating. I love cheating. We don't even need to know how to code these days thanks to Interview Coder. Check this out. Fuck LeetCode. We don't need to memorize this stupid LeetCode thing, blah blah blah, like the fucking dorks, okay? All we need to do is use Interview Coder during our engineer technical interviews. We'll get the big tech jobs. We're good. All right, we're gonna be rich as fuck. We're gonna live nice. We're gonna get that equity, nice shares. We might even meet Paul Graham.
We can meet Daddy Paul.
Hey Jason, thanks for taking the time to interview with us. I guess first things first, I have a quick technical question for you. Maybe you can tell me the runtime of Quicksort.
Yeah, one second. Runtime of Quicksort? The sort? The sort company. The sort sorts, Quicksort. Yeah, yeah. Um, 12.
12. Okay, 12 what?
Mm, milliminutes.
All right, I think we're just gonna use AI for this role. I don't think we need a human, actually.
