Lava-Mātra: A Moment with Jayapatākā Swami: HG Sudevī Sundarī Devī Dāsī #JayapatakaSwamiArchives

Hare Krishna. My name is Sudevi Sundari Devi Dasi. And I joined Krishna consciousness in 1994. I was searching, searching for something. And I remember I was actually like depressed. You know, I was 21 years old and I had, you know, all these so called pleasures of like, you know, a good job, making money, boyfriend, good friends, lived next to a beach. But I still felt so empty. So I one day I became, you know, for a few weeks I became very depressed. Actually it was more like an internal questioning. And I remember just lying on the floor crying and saying, who are you? I was speaking to Krishna, I was speaking to God. But I didn't know. I was like, who are you? Tell me who you are. Give me a sign. I want the truth. I want the absolute truth. Who are you? And I was like completely praying for the first time, praying to God to reveal. And then in those days we didn't have mobile phones. We had these like, you know, only the phone in the house. So my phone rang and I picked it up and my friend said, hey, you should come and meet this yoga teacher. He's come from Himalayas and he's teaching yoga now. Yoga is very popular now. But in Those days, back 1994, it wasn't popular and I was more of a dancer and jogger. So yoga was very boring. All this sort of, you know, I just thought, what is this? This is for old people. I'm not interested to meet him. She said, okay, then you come to my house and you paint. We haven't seen you for so long, you've been in your shell and what's going on? So I said, okay, I'll paint. So I went to her house and then she took me to meet this yoga teacher. And when I saw him, I didn't really believe in reincarnation yet. But when I saw him I was like instant past life recognition. It was like, where have you been? It was like, you know those times in your life when everything that happens, happens in that moment and you know that it's meant to be. It's like, it was like a scheduled, it was like a, like a scheduled contract that I was supposed to meet him. His name was Siddharth Prabhu and he was a disciple of Guru Maharaj. So he said to me, you come for yoga 4am to 6am tomorrow. Very strict he was. And I was like, okay, okay, I'll come, I'll learn yoga. So, so I came and started doing my yoga classes. And then I noticed who is that picture? Because he had a Small altar. And he said, oh, that's my guru. Of course, it was his Holiness, Jai Thakmaraj, Guru Maharaj. And I was like, oh. He's like, you know, I didn't think much, to be honest. I was just like, oh. I was a bit intrigued. So then I slowly started doing yoga and started teaching yoga. He started to teach me to become a teacher, and my relationship with him became quite strong. And he would make me read from the Bhagavad Gita like this. And then he had one friend who was a Kirtananda disciple. And so this Kirtananda disciple came to me and said, I will pay for your ticket. We will go to Malaysia, but you have a mission. And I said, what's that? He said, I will pay for your ticket, pay for your food book, your heart, your hearts. We can swim. We can. But I want two of you out of all the students there, I want two of you to come with me for this mission to Malaysia. And I said, what's the mission? And he said, you need to take this Shalagram Sheila from the altar. You need to steal it. And I was like, I didn't know what Shalagram was. It was his deity, you know, that he had brought. So I was like, okay, free ticket. You know, when you're young like that, I'll go. So I went on a mission to go to Kuala Lumpur Temple, which I went to. And my mission was to take something from the altar. And I was like, this doesn't feel right. It was my first time in a Hare Krishna temple. And I was like, I can't do it. I'll give you your money back. I can't do it. When I first walked into the Kuala Lumpur temple, I remember because I was young and I had health and beauty, and I remember seeing all the matajis making garlands and all the brahmacharis, you know, doing pujari. And I just thought, this is real beauty. This is, like, real beauty. I think I need to stay here. So I aborted the mission of stealing the deity off the altar, and I started to meet the devotees there, and they were mostly Guru Maharaj's godbrothers and God sisters. And they said, you know, you should steal because one of our gurus is coming to visit Malaysia in about two weeks. And I was like, what's his name? And they're like, jayapataka Maharaj. And I was like, oh, okay. I didn't click yet that that was the photo. And things were still not, you know, fully So I said, okay, let me meet one of these gurus. Because I. And they said, you can stay in the ashram. You just have to do some service. And so I was there in the washing pots. And, you know, if you know me, my family, I'm quite a little bit of a princess. Can be sometimes. So when I told them that I'm washing pots in the kitchen, they were like, what's she doing? This girl's gone crazy. Anyway, I started to meet the devotees and learn the classes and come to Mangalatik. And then it was the day that Guru Maharaj came and he arrived in Malaysia. Aaron was just in ecstasy. And, you know, I just got caught up in this ecstasy. But I was still a little bit skeptical. Gurumraj finally arrived, and I was, you know, when the ladies are flowering, when they're off the altar, you can't offer. They told me, you can't offer flowers when he comes. And I was like, oh, okay. So then Gurmaj came, and it was like the spiritual world opened up. It was like this personality of just complete loving, compassion and bliss. Everyone was like, chakra Deva, and they were all offering flowers. And I was feeling left out at the back because Gurumaj was receiving their offerings. And I was just like, maybe I should just ignore these matajis and just offer something. So then when everybody had finished offering, there was, like, two rose petals left in the basket. And I picked them up, and it was like slow motion. I'll never forget it. It was like seven circles. I did slow motion, just looked at Guru Maharaj in the eyes because most of the devotees were just, like, you know, like, all humble and, you know, but I was just, like, looking at Guru Maharaj. Seven slow circles. And I offered these petals, and I bowed down. And when I got up, when I got to sit back up, Gurumaj had picked up all the offerings, some big bunches of flowers, and threw it over my head. So when I came up, all these rose petals were coming off me, and that was it. I think I just got this, like, full, loving shower of love from Guru Mahraj. And then my hard heart started to melt, and I was like, wow, he's so. I think what really struck me was he was so compassionate and caring and personal. So then I carried on staying in Malaysia. I joined in Malaysia, and I started to obviously transform in my ka consciousness, and I started to take the process more seriously. But I was still addicted to one thing. And I was thinking, I don't want to give that up. And so When Gurumaj was leaving. So he was there for a few days, and there was like. He said, prabhu's one side. Mataji is one side. Group photo. So we had this group photo, and I was right next to Guru Maharaj, just on the side. And then Gurmaj said. And I was thinking, oh, I think I will stay with the devotees, but I will still do my one thing that I'm doing. You know, I like it. I don't think I will take it too seriously. I love the chanting. I love the philosophy, but I don't want to be a part of this whole iskcon. I was thinking like this. So I was still, you know, because I was attached to my sense gratification. And so then just before the photo clicked, Guru Maharaj looked at me and he said, stick around, but give up the. And he said exactly what I was doing. Totally read my mind. And in that photo. I haven't seen that photo. I think I must have been like. Because he totally, like, read my mind. Nothing. I said. And I was like, he's a real guru. He can see. He can understand who I am and what my. And my surrender just started from there. Stick around, he said, but give up the. And I was like, wow. And then I gave it up like that. Because, you know, when you try to give something up for yourself, we don't love ourselves that much. Well, I didn't at that time. But when you start to build relationship with guru, teacher, mentor, Guru Maharaj because you love him so much, it's so easy to give up. And I tried so hard to give this habit up in the previous times. And then when he said like that, he empowered me, and boom, just it went. So I stayed in Malaysia and served. Guru Mahj wanted me to stay in Malaysia, but I was very attached to Hong Kong because I'd lived there for about four or five years, and I had a community and I had yoga students there. So I moved back to Hong Kong. I was the only disciple of Guru Maharaj. And in those days, people wanted Zonal. They wanted, you know, everyone to take initiation from the same guru. You know, it was Tamakrishna Goswami in Hong Kong and Giridari Swami. But I felt, no, I was there. My heart was completely given to Guru Maharaj. I was like, this is my guru. So I moved back to Hong Kong, and I was the only disciple. And I suffered because, you know, I had no God sisters, no guru. You know, when you turn the Guru Bhakti and you talk to Your God sisters. It's so beautiful. But I was alone. So then I said to Guru Mach, I'm feeling lonely here. And he said, why you don't go back to Malaysia and serve under Shemeshwar Prabhu? He was the temple president at the time, Kuala Lumpur. But I also didn't feel like being in Malaysia. I wanted to be in Hong Kong because it was my home for quite a few years. So a few weeks later, I got a reply from Guru Maharaj. And he said, I'm coming to visit you in Hong Kong. And I was like, wow. So I went and met him at the airport. We had a beautiful program. And Gurumaj used to come and visit Hong Kong quite a few, you know, like maybe twice a year. So this is how I met Gurmaj. And I still hadn't taken Diksha. I was still like a Brahmacharini, still making sure that I would take my time. And my mom called my father in Canada and said, you daughter has joined a culture. Go and rescue her. She's gone crazy. She's sending me this Bhagavad Gita and this coming back and all these books. And so my dad flew from Canada to save me. And when he saw me, he said, wow, you look fantastic. No drugs, no boyfriends, no, you know. And I said, yes, I'm in this amazing movement and if you want to associate with me, you have to also follow the rules. So he was saying that, you know, he was saying that you, you. What was I saying? Yeah. So. So my dad, my dad came to Hong Kong to save me from this cult. And I said, dad, you know, you have to follow these rules. We wake up at 3:30, we go to Mangalati. You know, this is the. I'm taking, you know, I've taken shelter from Jaipur, Thakmaraj. And he's like, wow. And I said, and I'm getting initiation next week. I'm flying to this holy place called Mayapur Dham. It's in India. And my dad had never been to India because we are Indian, but we were born in Africa. So I said, you come, you meet my Guru. So I brought my dad to Mayapur. And I remember introducing my dad. I said, guru Maharaj, this is my material father. Dad, this is my spiritual father. And then my dad was very impressed by Guru Maharaj and his beautiful classes and his personalism and how caring and kind he was. He was asking my dad many questions. And finally my dad took initiation from Gurumraj and he became Shyam Sundar Bhagavan Das. And then he took second initiation. And my mom was like, oh, God, you were supposed to save them and you joined them. So this is the potency of Guru Maharaj. He was so happy that I was preaching to my family. He whispered in my ear, you are liberating your whole family. And you know, when Gurmaj is happy, oh my God, the heart just becomes so expanded. And I decided, you know, that I'm Guru Maharaj's spiritual daughter and I'm going to serve him life after life, eternally. Eternally. I'm dedicated. So Guru Maharaj empowered me in many ways. And we had a quite a few beautiful pastimes. One pastime was when he I came to Mayapur one time and I was living in Hong Kong serving as a Brahmacharini. And he called me in the pancha tattva. And I was like. He was like. So I went and I came to him and he said, I want you to see this studio in Sydney, in Australia. There's one Prabhupada disciple. He's looking for a yoga teacher and they want to do preaching. And I was like, oh, okay. Guru Maharaj. I didn't take it seriously because I was in Hong Kong. I'd never been to Australia. Then the next day he called me again. Here's the card. He got the card. He had it with him. He knew he would see me. Here's the card. You call him. And he gave me the card and he said, I want you to do this service in Sydney. And I was like, wow, I think he's quite serious about this. So then I went back to Hong Kong and I called this Prabhupada disciple. I said, I'm Sudevi Sundari. I'm a disciple of Jaipur Thakmaraj. And Guru Mahj wants me to do this to get in touch with you to do this service. So finally I got the service under Guru Mahj instruction to build this Sydney Yoga Center. And me and my husband, ex husband, we went to Sydney and we started to teach yoga. And it was very successful. Guru Maharaj came for the opening. Indra Jumana Swamy came. You may have seen that picture of Gurmaj and Indra Jumana Swamy doing the arm wrestle. It's a famous picture. So that was in the studio. You know, they had made a bet and Indrajumanaswamy had said to Guru Maharaj, oh, no, Pratapana Prabhu, who was the Prabhupada Sapa, said, Whoever wins this arm wrestle will get, I think, 1,000 Australian dollars, you know? So then both gurus were there, and I'm there, and I'm cheering on. Everyone's like, yeah, and Guru Maharaj. And then I feel like Guru Mahaj let him win. He just, like, surrendered. Because Guru Mahj is very strong. I don't know. But then Indrajumanaswamy pushed him down. Then we were all cheering. So Guru Mahaj came and he opened up this. He helped to open up the studio. And, you know, my realization is that when Guru Mahj gives instruction, wow, you are beyond happy. You know, we think we can be happy. We make our plans la, la la, if I do this. But when Gurumaj gives an instruction and you follow it, he knows exactly what we need. So I was very, very happy there. And Gurumaj came to visit a lot of times. One time when he came to Sydney, he invited me to a house program. So some Indians had had a house program, and Guru Maz had invited me to the house program. But I didn't get a direct invitation from the actual people that were having the health program. Guru Mas invited me, and I thought, okay, I'll come, of course. So it was a long distance away from Sydney, and me and my friends, my students, my yoga students were driving me there, and we got lost. So we called the servant and we said, we can't find. Where is this place? And we were late. And Gurumaj was late as usual. And then I could hear Guru Mahj in the background. Stop the car. Let's get the map out. So he made the drivers stop to give us directions on the phone. And then they weren't giving good directions. And Guru Maharaj was like, give me the map. I could hear him. He was like, okay. And he was like, checking how we should. Where are we? How we should go. And then he was giving directions. And then after five, ten minutes, we proceeded. But then again, we got lost. We got confused. So then we called again the servant who was driving Gurumaj to the house program. And Gurumaj said, stop the car and let's wa for them. So Gurumaj stopped the car and he waited for us to catch up. When we finally caught up with him, we came out and we were like. And my student saw the mirror on the car, and she was like, oh, I have a pimple. And Guru Maharaj was sitting in the front, and he was like, I know. Sometimes I get pimples. You know, it was like, so sweet, so fatherly. Like, so, you know, she was just a new yoga student that I was introducing to Krishna consciousness. And the way he. The way he deals with everyone, it's just so personal. So we finally went to that host program and everyone was surprised to see us because we were always like, always the excitable, crazy ones, you know. And, you know, Guru Maharaj had given me a lot, a lot of mercy. One time when he was in Sydney, there was a Guru Puja going on and I came late and there was some cookies, you know. And in those days back, you know, Guru Maharaj, we would do Guru Puja and everyone would get like some prasadam. So when I walked in, Guru Maharaj saw me and he started to throw the cookies at me. And all the cookies were like going on the. He was throwing. It was like I was in the spiritual world in some pastime. I couldn't believe it was happening. It was surreal. He started to throw the cookies at me and I was hiding behind different devotees, you know, and I was like, wow, what is Comradesh doing? You know? And then finally when I came to get my cookie, he was like, I was trying to get you with the cookies. And I was like, yeah. So, you know, sometimes I get glimpses into the spiritual world with Guru Maharaj. What fun we can have, you know, and how beautiful these pastimes are. Like, wow. So one another time when I came to visit Mayapur Gurumraj, I thought, you know, because when I took my first initiation, there was quite a few of us, there was like 85 of us. And I was like, he won't remember my name, my full name. I must accept it when I see him. He won't remember my name. Just accept. Prepare yourself. I was talking to myself like this. And then when I came in the queue, he said, here comes Sudevi Sundari Devi Dasi. And I was like, wow. Like, you know, after so many, he knows everybody's names, you know, and is like, he eradicate any mental doubts that I have. He like has done it so many times. He's just read my mind and just reciprocated like with me like that. So, you know, it's. It's amazing how he doesn't forget a single soul. And he knows everybody, everybody's name, you know, like that one of my then Gurumaj came to Hong Kong and then he. In 2008 and he went to Mumbai for the GBC meetings. And then he had his stroke. So he came to Hong Kong just before he had his stroke. And you know, he was in the coma for some time. And of course I was devastated. I could even like the pain. Everybody in the world was praying for him. And finally Guru Mahj came out of the coma and he went to Kwaiambatu to receive some ayurvedic treatment. And I thought, I'm going to go and see him. So I flew with my friend to Kwaiamba2. And Ekhanath was there and Mahavaraha. And there was just Ekhanath's wife that left. Her body was there, Devamayi. It was just a few of us. So they were warning me, when you go in and see Guru Maharaj, don't cry. I was like, oh, my God. How? Okay. I hadn't seen Guru Mahraj, you know, after the stroke. And they said that when Guru Maharaj was in the coma, that Krishna came to him and said, come back now, come back. And Guru Maharaj said, I haven't finished my service to Srila Prabhupada. So when I walked in and saw him, I of course cried and cried and cried. I couldn't believe him. And seeing Guru Mahj like that. And I was. I was mixed of emotion. I was sad. But. And I was also angry, angry that he didn't go like, how has he come back like this? So I said, guru Mahj, why didn't you go? And he said, I didn't know that I would come back like this. Such an austerity. Was so determined to fulfil the instructions of his Guru Maharaj Rla Prabhupada. Even he's dragging around his body now. His desire is so strong to fulfill such an example for us to follow that can we fulfill Guru Maharaj's instructions and be the spiritual daughters that he wants us to be? So after. After these, after that, he started to travel a little bit more. After he recovered and he started again to travel. Then he came to Hong Kong. And he said to me, should I wear crocs or socks on the plane? Or should I wear, like, trainers, like jogging shoes, or should I wear my crocs and socks? And I was like, why is he asking me about his footwear? He has his servants there. I don't understand. Oh, I don't know, Gurmaj. Maybe crocs and socks will be more comfortable. I just said like that. And then he's like, okay. And then he said, let's go shopping. And I said, okay, what do you want? And he said, I want some new shoes, some new running shoes. And I said, oh, but Your size is so big, Guru Ranja. Hong Kong. Everybody is very small, small. And to find size 42 is very. Going to be hard to find. But let's try. So we went. We went. We went looking. We went shopping in the wheelchair in the Hong Kong. Crazy, crazy shopping. And then we were bringing the shoes out and he was trying on. And then we found one his size, but it was very bright, like pink. And, you know, this modern design, like luminous and yellow and very, very like a colorful design. So then he said, okay, I'll take those. So then I bought them for him. And then he said, come to my room. And then he gave me his rebox. And he said to me, these are for you. How will you share them? How will you share the mercy? And I said, oh, every vyasa puja, I will bring them out and everybody will take darshan of your lotus trainers. So like this, he had. He had plans, you know, to give me. Give me his mercy and his Maha, which I worship once a year with full love. Another time, when it was his vyasa puja, I was standing in the queue and I had bought a watch for Guru Maharaj. And it was a beautiful watch that it was okay, but it read the heartbeat. It read his heartbeat because I was worried about his blood pressure. So. So I was explaining, gurmaj, this watch is like this, and it has all these functions. And then he just took off his watch from his wrist. Right there, from his wrist. He took off his watch and gave it to me. And I was like, oh, my. Amazing. And the servants were so surprised. They were like, what? You know, like, you're giving her. Who is. You know, you're giving her your watch. And apparently one of them said, why you gave her your watch, Guru Maharaj? Why did you give her? And he said, you don't know. She's very special to me. And I only heard this a few years ago because this servant, I met him in South India and he said, oh, you were the Mataji that got the watch. So then I. I mean, there's many pastimes, I can tell, but just to finish off, when I. It was a few. Last year, 2021, I went to a New Year's Eve gathering. We had a kirtan and like, we had a gathering. And Covid was getting very strong. And in Hong Kong, I'd been living, and I suddenly got this voice from inside my heart. Paramatma or Gurumraj, it was like Gurumraj's voice. And he said, come back home. And I Said, where is home? Because I'm a Hong Kong resident, British resident, Australian resident and Indian resident. I can live in any of those countries. Where's home? I've always been like, you know, moving from country to country, like, no routes, no home, you know, just moving, moving, come back home. I said, where's home? And he said, mayapur. And I was like, wow, okay. I got home from that gathering late maybe 1am and I was very tired. So I went, I went to bed and it must have been two or three hours later I woke up, got my computer, Air India, one way ticket. January 16, Hong Kong, Calcutta, one way. Then I put the computer and went back to sleep. When I woke up the next day, I was like, was that a dream? Opened my computer and then I saw I'd booked a one way ticket to Calcutta to come to Mayapur. And I was like. It was like I was in some sort of trance because I'd lived in Hong kong for like 15 years. And I booked a ticket one way after 14 days. 16th of January. So I had 14 days to pack up my whole everything. But it just was like a strong calling to come here. So last year I moved here and then I saw Guru Maharaj and I said, gurumraj, I booked my one way ticket and I'm here. And he went, what's your service? What are you doing? And I said, I'm teaching a bit of yoga this and that. He said, we need to have a retreat center. You need to bring your students here. I said, yeah, yeah, that's the idea. And then Guru Maharaj went. And then Mahavirahapurabhu called me two, three hours later and he said, guru Maharaj wants you to open up something here. You contact Vaikuntha Nithai. He's got a nice piece of land in Gora village. His vision is very nice. So then I contacted Vaikuntha Nitta and he said, it is a waiting list. There's no land here. And then I said, oh, there's no land here. He's telling me there's no land here. So then Mahavaraha spoke with Vaikuntha Nithai. And then Vaikuntha Nitai called me and he said, oh, there's some land here. 16 kata has just come. And I didn't have the Lakshmi. So I was like, how am I going to do this? Oh my gosh. And then what happened was I made a plan to build this yoga shala and guest house and to have like a vegan cafe in this land. And then I showed it to Guru Maharaj and had a personal darshan with him and I showed him the plan. He was very happy and he gave me blessings. And then I sent an email out to all my yoga students and donations just started coming in. 87 lakh. The land was bought all through donations and now we are in the building stage. We will open the ashram, the retreat center, in April 2024. Gurumaj's blessings have really empowered the whole project. And I just received one Karol last week for the building so construction. So all these Lakshmi from my yoga students has come in to fulfill Guru Maharaj's desire to serve them and bring them here. They are donating. So like this, I finally feel like I'm home. Guru Maharaj has brought me home to Mayapur. And honestly, for the first time in my life, I feel like I'm home. So indebted, so, so indebted to Guruj. How can we ever pay him back? The past times and the interactions and the love and the care and the spiritual illumination that I've received from Guru Mahaj is just beyond, beyond, beyond. It's like, it's so hard to describe. But my spiritual father is my life's mission. I want to serve him nicely. I want to bring lots of yoga students to Mayapur to study yoga in this beautiful land of Mahaprabhu and bring them to meet Guru Maharaj. And I pray that I can always be always in service to Srila Prabhupada and Guru Mahraj, Servant of the seven of the seven of the seven of the seven of the seven of the seven. This is my position. I'm very happy.