The Art of Having It All with Christy Whitman

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Hey, it's JJ Virgin. And welcome to the JJ Virgin Lifestyle show, where I talk nutrition, exercise, mindset and lifestyle with some of the coolest people in the world. Plus, I give you tips that you can put into fast action to uplevel your health so you can go out there and live the big life you're meant to live. Now, today's show is about the art of having it all and what that really means. And I will tell you, ever since this big turning point in my life four and a half years ago, when my son was the victim of a hit and run and left for dead in the street, and I went through four and a half months in the hospital with him, helping him come out of a coma, and has been the next four years we've been working on him coming through a traumatic brain injury that I have really, really been looking at mindset, at expectations, and really what having it all really means. And so I was super excited that I sat next to a gal, Christy Whitman, at an event called the Transformation Leadership Council. And it's a group I'm in that Jack Canfield started. So it's all these amazing trans transformational leaders and people who are like the biggest people in personal development. And so it's incredible who you're around, like, sit there each time going, oh my gosh. And I was talking to her and went, wow, this is a lot of stuff that I ended up doing intuitively as I was going through what happened with Grant. And my belief was this could be learned, which is why my next big book's about this. And she teaches people how to do this, which is why I went, oh my gosh, I have to have you on my show. And just like the rest of us. And she'll share this later on in the interview because as I'm interviewing her, I'm like, all right, now, she didn't just get here overnight. She didn't wake up, you know, wake up on a Unicorn with rainbows going around her. How did she get here? And just like everybody else I've met who's really out there doing amazing work, they've gone through a lot of struggles to get there. So you'll hear about those a little bit later on. Let me tell you a little bit about Christy first. She's a transformational leader, abundance coach and a New York Times best selling author of the book the Art of Having It All. She's been on the Today show, the morning show, and she's been in People magazine, 17, Women's Day, Hollywood Life, Teen Vogue, amongst others. She's the CEO and founder of the Quantum Success Learning Academy and Quantum Success Coaching Academy, which is a 12 month law of attraction coaching certification program. She has literally helped thousands of people worldwide achieve their goals with her seminar speeches and coaching sessions. And she reaches over 150,000 people a month with all of this. It's really quite amazing work as you're gonna hear here shortly. And she lives out in Canada. She splits her time between Montreal and Arizona with her husband and her two boys and runs this company while being a, you know, great mom, great wife, which just shows right there that yes, you can have it all. So I'm excited to share this with you and, and again, I'm really looking at as many of these great examples as I can share with you. Because what I've realized now, going through the last five years, is that the biggest thing for us, you know, I always talk about the biggest thing holding us back is our health. But quite often the biggest thing holding us back from taking care of our health is our belief in ourself and our self worth and you know, anything that could be limiting that. So I'm super excited to share Christy Whitman with you today. Alright, so let's do it. Christy Whitman, welcome to the show. I'm so glad you're here with me today.

Well, I appreciate the invitation jj. Thank you.

Well, this is something we have never talked about before. Now I know we like to think of living in abundance and you know, without these limits. But I think most people, when, you know, you talk about being an abundance coach, think about money. So what exactly is this? Are you coaching people to make more money or what's an abundance coach really mean?

Well, abundance is really all good things of everything. So you think about it, we come from an abundant source that never has a finite supply of anything. So whether it's money, whether it's air, whether it's food, and it could be all the material things of the world, but it also is the energy of the world. Love, patience, kindness, compassion, time when you think about it. So when you tap into the field of abundance, you're coming from a place that there always is more. There's always more to expand into and to become a fuller expression of ourselves throughout the experience of attaining it.

Okay, sounds like something all of us want. So how do you create it? Like what are the big secrets here to create more abundance?

Well, you know, the biggest thing is that, you know, you need to learn about the universal laws. And one of the biggest universal laws that most people aren't talking about is the law of sufficiency and abundance. It's not the law of abundance, it's the law of sufficiency and abundance. So we hear a lot of times that, you know, we need to make our gratitude list or we need to be a appreciative of things. And here's the reason. The science behind it is because the doorway through abundance is always through that place of being satisfied with what we have currently. It doesn't mean that we have to be satisfied and don't ever try or strive or desire any of that kind of thing. Because that's not living in abundance. It's coming from a place of really appreciating everything that you have in the situation that you have, whether it's your marriage and your partners, your kids, the money that you have, the career, success. No matter where you are right now, find some good and appreciation in that because that is the doorway into abundance which will allow you to create more of those things. Because most people are coming from lack and limitation. They're coming from, I'm dissatisfied. And that's totally repelling abundance.

Now I will tell you. And again, our community here is a very health minded community. And so some of this stuff may be new, which I love and I was so excited to have you on the show and bring these concepts in. So things that are rolling off your tongue as normal, I think people go, what do you mean universal laws?

Yes.

So what do you mean, Christie? Universal laws?

Well, in, okay, so as an Earth being, as a human being, there are laws that exist in the universe. So like one of them is gravity, right. If you walk to the side of the building and you kind of continue to go, you're going to go splat on the sidewalk. So there are other universal laws that are literally, they are for men or for women. They are, doesn't matter where you live, if you apply these and learn how to work with them, they're going to work in your favor because they're working all the time. Most people have heard about the Law of Attraction because the movie the Secret. So what you're sending out in your energy could be your thoughts, your emotions, your perceptions, your beliefs, Anywhere you choose to focus your mindset. This amazing divine thing that we have called a mind. Wherever we focus it, whatever images we conjure in our minds and that energy goes out into the universe, and then we attract those things that are of, like, vibration. So that's just one universal law. I talk about the seven essential laws. When you know all these, that's what really makes manifestation work. And the key to all of it is the law that we were talking about before, the law of sufficiency and abundance. So it doesn't matter who you are, it doesn't matter what your education is, what your sex is, have you been married before, if you're overweight or you're thin, it works all the time. And it just makes sense, sense that we understand what the laws are. Because it'd be like trying to go play a baseball game without knowing the rules. You hit the ball, you run to third, you're out. And just makes life a little bit more fun and a little bit more easy and joyful and deliberate.

Well, who doesn't want that, right? You know, let's look at, you know, and women in particular. My audience, obviously community, is more women, although we've got some guys in here too. But what are some. Some of these limiting beliefs that we've got out there that are the most common ones?

Well, you know, the one I see a lot is that we can't have it all. And it's interesting because I know you have a bigger population of women, but men never seem to have this kind of discussion that men can have it all. And it is a discussion in our society. Well, can really. We can really, you know, women, can they really have it all? And the question I ask is, what is having it all to you? Because when we make a blanket statement like, well, we can't have it all, that literally is creating such a restriction and limitation in a world that's absolutely abundant and infinite. And the divine that lives within us only knows infinite and expansion and fuller expression. So can'ts and shouldn'ts and all those things don't make sense. So it brings a lot of discontent within our physical bodies because it doesn't make sense with who we really are. So I would say find out all aspects of your life and look at the major factors, like obviously your health and Your body, What would having it all be for you? What would that look like? Maybe you lose weight, maybe you get in better shape, maybe you're in great shape, but you just are tired. Maybe your hormones are out of whack. Whatever it is for you, what would living, your fullness in your body and your vitality and energy be for you? And then look at all your other aspects of your life, your primary relationships, your career space, your time and energy and money freedom. And what would having it all look like for you? Because we're all different. We all want different things. They may look similar, but if we start asking ourselves, what would I love? What do I want? In all these different aspects, we evoke the divine in us that wants the same for us.

You know, what I'm really hearing, though, Christy, is I'm betting that to most of us, what we think having it all is, is not even the things we really want. That if we went and stood back and said, what is having it all really meaning, which is such a powerful thing, it's like, okay, it's not about the house you have or the car you drive at all, right?

Yeah, and those things are great, too. I mean, we're physically. It's like Madonna said, we are living in a material world, and I am a material girl. I mean, we are physical human beings that live in this physical manifest of a universe. So if I'm going to drive from A to B, I want to drive in a really nice car. If I'm going to carry stuff in a purse, I want to carry a really nice purse. And yet it isn't about those things, too. It's more between the energy that you carry and the feelings that you hold inside yourself and the energy that you give out and the relationships that you have and the experiences that you have. It's really what you want. But it always, always starts with the energy that we have within ourselves and that we give out into the universe that comes back to us in experiences, sit, situations, friendships, money, no money, you know?

Yeah. I see it again and again, and, you know, whether I'm coaching clients on their health or business, is that it always comes back to this. It always. It's like the. The information's out there for whatever it is you want to do. But if you don't have the beliefs, then you stop. So if you have these beliefs that are limiting this abundance, limiting your abilities, how do you change them?

Well, it's really easy. It's something you have to do on a consistent basis, because impact and change Happens either when there's big impact or when there's repetition and it's important to be mindful and aware of. Where are you putting your focus? Where are you mentally picturing things in your mind? Are you picturing lack and limitation, doom and gloom, everything's always wrong? Or are you picturing a future that you want to create? Are you picturing things that are, you know, things that you would love to experience? And when you're not, when you're in that place of feeling constriction in your body, when you feel bad in any way, you're in lack, you're in limitation. And it's up to us as an individual person to notice when we're feeling that way and then change our thoughts that are bringing that feeling. So, for example, well, I just don't seem to have enough money. Well, that statement is always going to bring a feeling of discontentment in our bodies. And it's probably because we are content, connected to a place where we just can't see how we could make more money, for example. And if we open up and know that the divine that breathes me knows for how I can make more money or have better opportunities or get a job promotion or all those other things, we've now shifted our mindset and our energy field. So what we attract is a completely different outcome.

Okay, so I'm going to play devil's advocate over here. We've got this person who is, you know, 20, 30 pounds overweight, or their husband's leaving them, they just got fired from their job. Now what do they do here when they're just like so far away from that and they've got to flip this mindset and they're scared and they just feel like they're as far from having it all as possible.

I love that you're asking that question because that happens all the time. And we have contrast that happens in our lives. The first thing we have to do is we have to process our emotions. So obviously, if your husband's leaving you, you're going to feel sadness. You have to process the energy that's happening. Allow yourself to cry, feel the frustration, feel the fear, whatever it is, and then start to think about what you do want. What are you going to. I mean, what is going to. The situation happened. Your husband's leaving you, for example. Right. What would you love instead? You know, what would make you happy? What? You have an opportunity to live your life from a totally different space. Now, what would you want to move into, to deny the emotions and everything that's going on energetically is ridiculous. You have to process the emotions. We are human beings and we have these things called emotions. So you have to start there, but then you got to start asking yourself questions that are going to move you in a direction that will get you to think differently and picture something differently. It's all about our minds and the images that we create and the things that we visualize. And if we think we're all God now, we're going to be desolate and alone and fat for the rest of our lives. I mean, that's going to take us down an avenue that we just don't want to continue to drive on. So we have to change lanes.

It is so clear. Like, when my son was in the hospital, I just couldn't go down those paths of what if he died? And what if he. Because I was like. They were such scary paths that it was like, you know, I just thought, I'm just not going to think that way exactly. Because I just. I always feel like thoughts create, and if I think that way, that's going to happen. And so I'm relating to everything you're saying of so many of these things that I've gone through. But of course, the biggest question I have as I'm listening to all this is, where did this come from for you? I mean, you just roll this stuff off as if it's just. It's like you were born and this just. This is like, you know, was inside you. Did you go through some big crisis? Like, what happened for you to be this person who has this, like, any curveball I'm trying to throw you, you're like, oh, da, da, da, da, da, da, Right?

Yeah, I've lived it. I mean, I was blessed to kind of find this information at a very crappy part of my life 20 years ago. And I've literally lived through having my son, two months old, rushed to the hospital and same kind of situation, having to focus on only the results that I wanted. Because he's like, literally at his dying breath, and it's like, what do I do? How do I refocus? How do I practice what I preach? I've gone through a divorce. And it ended up because the focus and the concentration, the energy I brought to it turned out to be a beautiful thing where he just contacted me the other day, hey, thinking about you, I'm like, oh, that's nice. Sending you love, literally. And, you know, been through like, $160,000 in credit card debt several times, lost jobs. I had My sister commit suicide. So it's not like I've had a silver spoon in my mouth and I'm just sitting on a cloud with rainbows all around me. And I never have contrast that, you know, it's like, these are the times when I need to practice what I preach. And it is in those really hard times when, you know, I don't know if you've ever been there, jj, but a lot of people, it's like you're credit card debt and the credit card companies are calling you and they're more.

Than half a million dollars in debt, honey. Couldn't pay my mortgage or feed my children. So, yes, been there, done that.

The heaviness and the fear and all that goes. And then it's just like, it's a constant reminder with the credit card companies calling and constant. It's like in those kind of situations, we have to find that space within ourselves where we could go, what would I love? What do I want? What is going to feel good to me? Oh, having $100,000 in the bank and zero balance on my credit cards. Wow. What would that feel like? Oh, my gosh. I feel like freedom. I feel like security. And then getting into that space and maintaining that space, even though the conditions are different. We all have contrast that shows up in our lives, but we can't go down with the contrast. We have to be deliberate in paying attention to the only thing that we really can. That is the mind that we think with, the visions that we hold and the energy that we give out.

It is so clear. This is absolutely what allowed me to go through, you know, the whole thing with my son. I just didn't have. I just intuitively did it. So I am glad you're out there teaching it, because my whole thing, as I look back on it, was, I know this can be taught. I know these things can be taught. I know these are just rules of the universe. And this is universal and can change people's lives. And the more I've been out coaching people, the more I've seen is this is everything comes from here, not vice versa. It's like, you don't get great and then look back at these things. You do this and you become great. It's super clear. So I love what you're doing, and I love your work. And for everybody listening, you've got a great book, the Art of Having It All, A Woman's Guide to Abundance. Now, where can people go to learn more? Christy?

They could go to christywhitman.com and any way you spell it, you're going to get there. But it's C, H, R, I, S, T, Y and Whitman is W, H, I, T, M, a, n. So christywhitman.com and I offer a free abundance webinar on there. So just by joining the family, which is what I call my community, you get enrolled into a free webinar that's going to give you all the ins and outs on what is abundance, what is lack, how do you know when you're in it? And then really some tips on how to shift so that you're changing your outer reality because you're changing your inner reality.

Awesome. So christywhitman.com jump in there. And thank you, Christy, so much for joining me today. After the break, I'm going to be answering a listener's questions. So stay with me.

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Welcome back. Now this is a time where I usually answer listeners questions, but today I'm not going to. Today I'm going to share something myself. And because this interview brought up a lot of stuff, I mean, as I was listening and talking to Christy, I was putting myself back into the hospital with Grant. Now if you don't know the story, when my son, I have two sons and they're a year apart, Grant and Bryce. And Grant's the older one. And when he was 16, he was crossing the street and he was the victim of a hit and run and he was literally left for dead in the street and he was airlifted to the local hospital where he had a torn aorta that kills 90% of people on the scene. Multiple brain bleeds and 13 fractures, literally bones sticking out of his skin. We were told there that there was nothing we could do because in order to fix that torn aorta, they'd have to give him blood thinners and then his, his brain would bleed out. So basically we could pick his brain or his heart, but not both. We found out that there was a hospital that could fix him, but we'd have to airlift him. And the doctor told us that in order to. The chance he'd survive an airlift was so slim. And even if he survived an airlift, the chance he'd survive the surgery was even slimmer. And even if he did that, most likely he'd be so brain dead damaged that it wouldn't matter. I remember my 15 year old son, Bryce, was 15 at the time, looked over and so about a 0.2% chance. And the doctor said, that's about right, son. And he said, I'll take those odds. And so we, we went about getting him airlifted to this hospital and he went through the surgery and he was lying in bed in a coma. And at that point we all decided that this was going to be the best thing that ever happened to Grant and that he was going to be 110%. And not just that it was going to be the best thing that ever happened to Grant. It was going to be the best thing that ever happened to all of us, us and to people around the world, because we'd be able to make that impact. And you know, when you operate from 110%, when doctors come in and said, oh, we're just trying to get him to be able to walk again, or, oh, we don't know if he's ever going to wake up, that's just not a reality anymore. And it was being able to hold on to that goal and operate from that that allowed us to pull through some of the darkest times, the darkest nights, multiple surgeries to save his life, big issues with someone with a brain injury. Again, a lot of this is coming out as I'm going to be putting a lot more of this information into the podcast and then I've got a book coming out, a documentary coming out about it. But it did really show me that you can change everything when you change your thoughts, that your thoughts can create and how powerful they are. And that our decision that day, standing in the icu, that this was going to be the best thing that ever happened to Grant and to all of us, and that he was going to be better than before really shaped the course of his treatment. And I am super happy to say that he is better today than he was before. So again, stay tuned. More of that story will be coming out now. If you would like to submit a question, just go to jjvirgin.com ask and you can leave a voice for me. I love hearing from you and I also love to hear from you. If you could jump on Stitcher or itunes and leave a review for me. It helps me a bunch and be sure to subscribe and share the show with your friends. This is JJ Virgin signing off and reminding you that you are worthy. Dare to live a life that matters.

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