How to Overcome Any Challenge in Life (No Matter The Odds) Feat. Les Brown and Dan Sullivan

Joe Polish hosts Les Brown, Dan Sullivan, Trent Shelton, Sean Stephenson, and Jennifer Carroll discussing how to overcome major adversity. They share personal stories of battling cancer and grief, and explain how mindset and faith shaped their resilience through life's hardest moments.
What advice would you give to someone that is struggling with addiction? Because I know in your book, you don't say that. You don't tell people this is the path to do it. I mean, everyone.
Because what I did, I don't suggest that to anybody. Everybody can do what I did.
Yeah.
Okay. I went to something that I was told. How many of you speakers, raise your hands, please. Speakers, how many of you are coaches? Okay. What we do is when we speak as speakers, as coaches, as entrepreneurs, the people that are with us, they all have stories in their head that they got from life. My favorite book says, be ye not conformed to this world. Be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind. When Dr. Alfred Goldson came to me and said, les Brown. Yes. I've got some bad news. I said, what is it? He said, man, he said, you got prostate cancer. Your PSA is 2,400. I said, what does that mean? That means your prostate specific antigen 1 to 4 is normal. And I asked, I said, is there anything else? He said, yeah, what? It's metastasized to seven areas of your body. I said, wow. He said, why are you smiling? I said, man, seven is my lucky number. He looked at his nurse. I said, I was born February 17th. I'm one of seven children. Joshua marched around the walls of Jericho seven times. Naaman dipped himself in the River Jordan seven times. I said, Seven is my lucky number. And I asked, is there anything else? He said, yes. And I said, what is it? He said, you're ugly, too. He said, but you got. You got this. Brown, are you listening to me? He said, I never tell my patients they're terminally ill. What I say is that my knowledge, my abilities and my skills have terminated. I determine the diagnosis. You and God determine the prognosis. A fact is not a verdict. You got your work cut out for you. I said, thank you. I want you to write this down. Distraction, dispute and inspire. What he did was cancer. Yeah. Yeah. Distract. Cancer is the most feared word in seven different languages. So when someone is told, you have cancer, the fear alone. There's a book called the Biology of Hope that it compromises your immune system to protect you by 40%. So what he did was he distracted me from the fear. And when he made me laugh. When you laugh, and I use humor in my presentation because when people laugh, Joe, they're not thinking and their hearts open. And then I come up back with something I want them to get in their heart. He said, you're ugly, too. And I started laughing. Say, cool. That ain't funny. He said, but you got this. You got this. And I felt it in my heart. He said, a diagnosis is not a prognosis. No, this is no verdict. You and God got this. And that's what we do when we distract them from the current story and speak affirmatively, you can make it through this. You dismantle their current belief system. You're now in their heart, and you inspire them to become, as Mother Teresa would say, a pencil in the hand of God and start writing a new chapter in their lives. And that was 39 years ago. That's why I got the Cancer Centers Center, Cancer Center's Award of America perseverance, 39 years, fourth stage cancer. Yes. Yeah. So when we speak, the mindset, your mindsets, the whole area of psychoneuroimmunology, the mindset, the biology of hope that Norman Cousins talked about, who was a physicist and he saw old Groucho Marx movies and I Love Lucy and use humor to get through it. And so through your mindset, through changing your eating habits and decreasing the toxic negative people in your life and things that's not in alignment with you, being able to live a life of joy, harmony and peace, that's very important. You have to begin to assess yourself and look at your life, and you have to say, who is it I can count on and who should I count out? And you're one of those people I call. I said, joe, been through this. This is his passion. And then I went online, I started doing research. I wanted to find out. I told everybody, if you know somebody who died from prostate cancer, don't tell me. I'm not interested. I want to know who lived. There's a song called I Don't Want Nobody Bringing Me Any Bad News. I'm not being insensitive. I just don't need that in my consciousness. And so. So I went online and saw this kid, Dr. Lee, starving cancer, and Chris beat cancer. And I started talking to people. A guy who, in my book that I talk about who. I went to meet him at his house. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. And they said, people die within six months, and it's been eight years now. And I asked him, I said, man, why are you here? He said, three doctors told him to get his affairs in order. But there was a doctor he developed a relationship with, and I talk about this in the book. And he came in and he said, this is for you. And he gave him a clock. It was wrapped up, and he unpackaged the gift the clock. He said, man, there's no hands on this clock. He said, I know. He said, you have to determine how long you want to be here. That's your call. That's not us, that's you. You now have to take responsibility for what you want to do. At this point, you can either surrender to what we have told you. And I'm saying to you that we are not experts. This is a practice because I got a stethoscope and a white jacket. Just because I said, or my partner said that you have a terminal illness does not mean that it's true. Life is a fight for territory. And once you stop fighting for what you want, what you don't want will automatically take over. You gotta fight on your hands.
There's a point in time where, as you know, you've sat through with many people. When life ends, it is time to let go. And that. Do you have a fear of death?
No. Here's to. I'm not a religious person. I want to say, because I quote a lot of things from Bible everywhere. I'm not a religious person, but I'm a spiritual person. Religious people afraid of going to hell. Spiritual people have been there and. And hell, to me, is what you experience when you die and you meet the person that you were supposed to become. That's why one of my mentees, Dr. Miles Monroe out of the Bahamas, who died in a plane crash, that we. And I give my speech, live full and die empty. He said, the ideal situation for a man or woman to die, Howard Thurman, is to have family members praying with you as you're about to cross over. But he said, imagine if you will, being on your deathbed and standing around your bed, the ghost of the dreams, the ideas, the abilities, the talents, the gifts given to you by life. But you, for whatever reason, you never used those talents. You never tapped into those gifts. You never made that contribution. You never made the impact that you were chosen out of 400 million sperm to make. And there they are, standing around your bed, looking at you with large, angry eyes, saying, we came to you and only you could have given us life. And now we must die with you forever. I want all of you to say with me, live full.
Live full.
Say it again. Live full.
Live full.
Die empty. That's what the Genius Network is about. It's about robbing the cemetery of the gifts that you have in you. You are masterpiece because you're a piece of the master. You were born and preserved for such a time as this. Don't Come for me. I didn't call an Uber. Yeah.
Wow.
So grief, loss, betrayal, that level of pain, when that happens, you have spent so much of your life giving inspiration, energy, encouragement, belief to others, or at least doing your best to transfer that. When it happens to you, what do you do?
I'm glad you asked that question. The model that you have here is what I do. I believe in order for us to make it, we're going through. We're watching and witnessing the throes of a dying beast. When my mother. I've never seen anybody die before, but my mother was feeling her arms, you know, he said, mama, you've done your best by us. Let go. Mama, let go. But her arms everywhere. We wanted her to stop moving like that. When humans die, sometimes people fight it, or like animals, you know, fight it. And. But there was a point where she stopped and we saw her looking in the distance. And I see death as a transformation, that we've finished the course. And my goal is to die young, at an old age. You know, at 78, I realized that life is like a roll of toilet tissue. The closer you get to the end, the faster it runs out. And so I don't fear death. And because my goal is my brother, who he's a Vietnam veteran, he wanted to be in the room with us today, but he was a paratrooper. He was in Vietnam and the Persian Gulf. He did two tours and he dropped out planes 176 times. And he's experiencing a lot of pain. Anybody that has something that's non addictive that can help alleviate that pain, I really appreciate it. But he asked me last night, leslie, when are you going to retire? And I brought him with me because his wife of 50 years and 6 months, we just buried her this past weekend. And I brought him with me during the break. I went back to the room. I saw how fragile he was. We're just five minutes apart. He went out first. I heard a slap and he started crying. And I said, what's going on? And they pulled me out, you know. But when I saw him, I realized how much of himself that he lost during the years he's been taking care of his wife as a caregiver. And I'm so glad I brought him. I wanted him to come here and meet people and be in a different environment rather than being in a house by himself. And you've been with somebody 50 years and six months, that snatches something out of you. And I went back during the lunch break and he turned to walk away With a friend of mine, with me. HB Took him lunch from here. Thank you for that. I realized it's amazing how life is. Edward Alvey had a play called the Zoo Story. And he said, sometimes you have to go a long distance out of the way to come back a short distance correctly. My brother And I, at 18, we were separated. He went to Vietnam. They wouldn't take me because we were twins, and I was the only oldest to take care. Mom adopted seven kids altogether. So I was there to take care of other brothers and sisters. That's the first time we've been separated, and here we are back together. I said, wesley, it's been four days. I come and knock on your door, and when you come to the door, I said, this is my brother. I said, we're back together again. I said, I don't want you to worry with it. People die within six months when they lose someone that they've been. Many caregivers die before the people they take care of. And he said to me, I'm going to be all right, Leslie. We're going to finish strong together. And so when I look at the work that you're doing, people have to have mental resiliency. They have to upgrade their skillset, and they have to create communities like the Genius Network of collaborative achievement driven supportive relationships. A lot of people are intimidated by artificial intelligence. Well, I come from the era of rhythm and blues. Marvin Gaye and Tommy Terrell, and they had a song called Ain't Nothing like the Real Thing, baby. Artificial intelligence has nothing on you because it doesn't have a heart. It doesn't have your experience. It doesn't have your ability to look at a situation and be able to allow a person to get a vision of themselves on the other side of whatever they are experiencing. You are irreplaceable. Why y' all looking at me like that?
Yeah, I think that's. That is very, very profound.
Yeah.
Hey, I hope you're enjoying this video. And I want to let you know that I have a new book that's come out, and if you'd like to get it absolutely free, there's a link below in the description. Or you can wait till the end of this video, or you can Simply go to joesfreebook.com and you can get a copy there.
Imagine you're sitting in a doctor's office and your spouse or loved one is told, I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer and you have less than six months to live. What would you do? Would you panic or Would you have peace? I am going to teach you five keys today to clarify your mental mindset and how to deal with adversity when it hits. Let me share my screen with you. This is my husband Bob, and Bob and I have been married for 30 wonderful years. On January 5th of 2021, he was diagnosed with stage 4 bone cancer, and his doctor told him that he has six months to live. At the time that the doctor was delivering that news to him, he looked right at me and said, go home and get your affairs in order. I thought to myself, so what now? What you see? So what is the beginning of the process now? What is the action that you take? We all know the amazing Jennifer Carroll, who's taken a year off from genius. But Jennifer's mantra was bend over and take it like a man. Unlike Jennifer's husband. My husband was diagnosed with prostate cancer two times previously and he beat it both times. But this time it's come back as single cell carcinoma, which is a fast and aggressive bone cancer in its terminal. When the news was delivered to me about my husband's health and what was coming ahead of us, I decided that instead of being in a state of adversity, I wanted to thrive. We all know our beloved leader, Joe Polish, decided to take a sabbatical because his friend Mark passed away. Mark had everything. He was active, he was healthy, he was 59 years old, and he was rich. He was worth $300 million, but he died instantly. As a high achiever, how often do you put your clients needs ahead of your own? How often do you put off things like going to the doctor, getting into shape, updating your will, or getting your financial affairs in order? In 2015, I had a client whose husband passed away and he had always managed their money and their real estate portfolio. Right after he passed away, their property manager embezzled $30,000 and skipped town. A few months later, my client was sued for over $900,000 for a mistake that this property manager had created. After watching all the pain and agony that my client was going through, I decided to write a book called They're Gone. And it's a survivor's guide to help women deal with their financial affairs and their real estate portfolio when their spouse or loved one passes away. When writing this book, I decided that I wanted to make sure my own financial affairs were in order. So my husband and I updated our wills and we created a plan to free and clear our house, and we put all of our assets into a family trust. I had no idea at the time. How later that would give me the financial strength that I needed. I'm going to teach you the five keys that you need to know in order to survive adversity.
Hey, I hope you're enjoying this video and I want to let you know that I have a new book that's come out and if you'd like to get it absolutely free, there's a link below in the description. Or you can wait till the end of this video or you can simply go to Joe's free book and you can get a copy there.
The first one is Planning for today will give you strength for tomorrow in 2018, while training for a four day backpacking trip through the Arizona desert, I developed a pain in my chest that took my breath away. I knew I had a benign lump, so when I returned from the trip, I went to a surgeon and I asked her to remove it. She called me several days later and indicated that it had morphed into stage three breast cancer and she was referring me to an oncologist. When I met with the oncologist, he told me that we had to be fast and aggressive to beat the cancer and within days I had a chemo port inserted into my chest and I started chemotherapy Within a blink of an eye. I went from being a healthy, successful commercial real estate broker to fighting for my life. I had four rounds of chemotherapy. I lost all my hair, I lost all of my energy, and my gynecologist told me to stay home from work to protect my immunity. After my last round of chemo, the surgeon called me and indicated that she had taken my case to the tumor board and that they were recommending a double mastectomy in order to ensure that the breast cancer did not come back. I could have been disappointed and depressed. I had just survived six months of chemotherapy and I was exhausted. It was a grueling experience, but for me, it was just a small bump in the road. When my surgeon told me that I needed to have a double mastectomy, my next question was so what now what? And my now what? Was what day do I show up for surgery? How quick can I recover? And how quick can I go back to the life that I crave? I also experienced total financial peace during that process. Because of the prior planning that I had completed with my husband, I was able to take the 12 months off of work and recover and take care of my health. So ask yourself, are you prepared for adversity? When my husband's diagnosis of cancer was shared with me, I knew I had all of the pieces of the puzzle put together. But taking care of a sick loved one is exhausting. My life changed overnight. In the last 30 days, my husband's health has changed drastically. He's had to be rushed to the hospital three times in an ambulance. He's had 10 blood transfusions in over 12 days. His first round of chemotherapy pushed his blood sugars above 800, which is a stroke level. He developed a blood infection which he was hospitalized for over a week. I actually broke into the hospital and stayed in his room for five days to guarantee he was coming home. When my husband and I were married 30 years ago, we purchased long term health care plans. His premium is $3,000 a year, and for that he now receives over 60 hours a week of skilled in home health care. If I had to pay for that out of pocket, that would cost me $11,180 on a monthly benefit. So save yourself some heartache and reach out to a smart financial advisor like Jim Doo who can help you plan ahead for long term health care and plan for future adversity. Key number two is develop unbreakable grit. I love the Navy seals. They are trained to rewire their brain to not freak out in a time of fear. The average Navy SEAL trains one year before they even become a Navy Seal, and most drop out because the training is too tough. Even after they become a Navy seal, they train every single day. In my morning training ritual, I get up every morning for the first hour and I watch Ben Hardy and Evan Carmichael YouTube videos. My goal is to arm myself with positive thoughts so that I can fight off adversity. During the day, Ben talks about training for your future self. What do you put into your mind every day? Are you training for your future self? Key number three is be grateful even in the midst of darkness. The day my surgeon put the chemo port into my chest, I sent her roses because I was so grateful for the opportunity that she was giving me. She was giving me a second chance at life. The amazing author BJ Fogg in his book Tiny Habits, mentioned that every time he changed his mother's bandage, instead of complaining about Kaiser Permanente, he would remind himself and his mother of his fond childhood memories. The day my husband and I came home from his appointment, I made a two page list, front to back, of all the fun things that my husband and I have done. And I remind him of that every single day. Key number four is build your tribe of warriors. When I was going through chemotherapy, I read Sage Levine's book Women Rocking Business Sage is a brand new Genius Network member and amazing at empowering women. Her book teaches you how to create a thriving life and do the work that you love. I highly recommend her book to everyone in Genius Sage Book. Sage's book was inspiring and helped me realize that I hadn't even scratched the surface for my life. I started mentoring other female real estate brokers that wanted to get into commercial real estate and today those brokers are now helping me with my business while I take care of my husband's health needs. Key number five is Be forward thinking and dream big. When I was going through treatment, I was always forward thinking and dreaming of my next big adventure. Within 12 months of returning to work, I closed the two biggest deals of my career and I went on a five day backpacking trip through Yellowstone with a 45 pound backpack on my back. The Genius Network is a room full of doers. There is someone in this group right now that can help open a door or solve a problem for you. So here's what you need to do. Make a plan. Take your first action and reach out to that Genius member before this event ends. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Make that decision right now to deal with what you have been putting off and remember so what is just the beginning of the process now? What is the action that you take? So go out, take action and make it a great day.
Do you remember how old you were when you first lied to yourself? I was in second grade. I was wearing a Bo Jackson T shirt and dark blue sweatpants. But I'm getting ahead of myself. You know, when people meet me, they conjure up a lot of ideas of who they think I am or what challenges I must have to go through. And they're right. I certainly have challenges that I deal with. But it's not the physical challenges that weigh us down in life. We learn to cope with them or we get tossed aside. It's the emotional ones that truly take a lot of courage to deal with. The day I learned about lying to myself. We call that denial. And denial happened when I was in second grade. My mom dropped me off at school one morning and this was before cell phones and pagers. She then had a whole day of errands planned so she wasn't going to be home. And my father was on a business trip. And as the day progressed, something happened. I experienced an incredible amount of pain in my abdomen. The kind of pain that lets you know that something bad is coming. And as I was holding my abdomen, I realized I was getting sick. And what you May never know is people that are in my condition, we can't usually use normal bathrooms. We have special equipment. And so my equipment was at home. And I was getting sick, and I knew I was going to have diarrhea. Now I'm in second grade. And that's the moment I told myself, sean, if you can just act like nothing is wrong, you can go in your pants right now. And I told myself that if I just acted natural, if I just put on that good smile, if I act like everything is great, they'll leave me alone because they'll think that everything is fine. Don't we all do that? Put on that smile, let everybody know I'm fine. And so I switched seats on the Titanic. I went from being in that abdominal cramps to then sitting in my own waist. And the people at a distance, they couldn't tell. They thought I was happy and fine and normal. But the people close, they knew something was wrong, didn't they See? We can smell the truth, can't we? The people in your life that are close know what you're going through. And sadly, I've been a studier of human beings. And sadly, I've found that human beings, what they think is the best thing is to just keep people far enough away from you that they can't smell the truth on you. I'm here to tell you that's not the way to live life. The way to live life is to get help, no matter what size problem you're dealing with. It wasn't until I was willing to come out of that denial, willing to shake myself from that delusion that I was fine, that I went to the nurse's station. I called my neighbor and asked her if she would come and clean me up. And as I was laying on that nurse's stage cotton and she was cleaning me up, I was just filled with shame and embarrassment. How did I get myself into this? What kind of idiot am I? Why did I think this was a good idea? She looked deep into my eyes. She said, oh, sweetie, you did your best. Every single person in here, I'm here to tell you, you're doing your best. No matter what mess you're in, no matter what mess you've been in or what mess you're headed into, you're going to do your best. But it's not until you get out of denial, it's not until you're willing to say, I could use some help right now. I'm ready to take off this fake smile, that everything is perfect. And I'M willing to reach out and say, hey, I'm stuck here. I'm going through this challenge in my marriage. My kids don't talk to me. My business is not as great as the numbers. I say. It's not until we reach out for help can we get out of our messes. And one of the best ways that I've got myself out of my messes is through a simple line that I would like you to write down in your notebook. It will pull you out of tons of problems. It's a question that you can ask yourself no matter what circumstance you're in, no matter how difficult. And the question is, what's funny about this? I learned the power of laughter years ago when I worked for Congress. That's some funny stuff right there. I worked on Capitol Hill for my congressman. And one morning, I got to work early. Have you ever got to a meeting early or an event early? You have your hot tea and your newspaper, and you're just ready for your me time. Well, that's what happened. I got to work early. I thought I was the only one there until I heard a voice off in the distance. Sean, get in here. Yes, Mr. Congressman. Sean, I need you to run a message on the other side of the Capitol. Can you do that? No one else is here. Yes, sir. So I take this message. I head out to a part of the capital that I'd never been to. I get to the elevator bank. Now, for those of you that are a little perceptually slow, I'm not very tall, so when I get to the button, I have to take with me an elevator stick, also known as a back scratcher. I press the button, except doors open. I go inside. I turn around, I find my floor, hit the button. The doors are now closed, and the light is not coming on. And I realize, oh, no. On the outside, the buttons are pressure sensitive. On the inside, they're heat sensitive. And my elevator stick wasn't hot enough. So I thought, what would MacGyver do? If I had a pack of chewing gum and a tampon, I could make a bomb. So I start heating this sucker up. Nothing happened. So I did what any other man would do. I just started stabbing violently the button. Nothing happens. So then I decided to sit on my elevator stick. And now I am grinding my elevator stick. I am like, who's your daddy? Right? I press the button. What do you think happened? Nothing. I asked myself one question. What question did I ask myself? The answer to that was nothing. So that's why you have to Ask it a couple times. What could be funny about this? Well, then I looked up, and I saw a little camera in the elevator. Finally, the elevator doors open because somebody called her from the outside. I get down to the maintenance department and I say, excuse me, you have elevators trapping people with disabilities whose elevator sticks aren't hot enough. And the man said in the most condescending voice, boy, they're not heat sensitive. They conduct an electrical current. If you would have had just a little bit of tin foil on the end of your elevator stick, you would have been fine. I looked at the men who comes to work with tinfoil. Am I just gonna be in an elevator? Like, hey, guys, wanna bake a batch of brownies? What are you talking about? And it was that moment that we started to laugh together. And you guys all run successful, amazing lives. But I see you in my office. As a therapist, I have a unique way of dealing with my clients. I see them for 12 hours in a row and then never again. And I see people holding on to stress and they're in messes and they're not getting help until finally they reach out and you gotta laugh. You gotta take yourself well. Not so seriously, you know, I love to laugh. That's why I'm friends with Joe Polish, right? If you want a good laugh, be friends with Joe Polish. I mean, his dating life alone is hilarious. I mean, but honestly, raise your hand if you've been greatly impacted by Joe Polish, right? I mean, Dan Sullivan. I mean, if it wasn't for Joe, I mean, you'd have to quote yourself, right? I mean, Dean Graziosi. If it wasn't for Joe Polish, you'd still be slumming it at 15 million a year. I mean, think about all the good. But you've all taught me so much. Where's Brendon Burchard? Brendon has taught me so much. One of the things he always ends with is, did I live? Did I love? Did I get more likes on Facebook than Tony Robbins? Just saying. Just saying. You gotta laugh. You gotta have fun here. Thank you so very much.
How many people's businesses and what they end up doing for a career has absolutely nothing to do with what they ever thought they would land into. It's like these strategic byproducts, and a lot of it comes out of total adversity. And for areas of life that not only don't work, that are totally broken, and you're forced to take a path that you would never typically want to go down, and there you are. And then Your ability to parlay it into something. So, like, when did you first record a video and put it up and get feedback either from your friends or it just dawned on you and now, you know, you've got literally millions of people that watch you on probably a daily basis.
Right? My first serious video because I was still, you know, I was kind of a social media YouTube guy at the time, back in like 2007. And so you stream back then. And so I would just stream regular stuff while I was playing football. I would go on there. But it was very rehabbish, as I would say, you know, like, I was very inconsistent with my lifestyles. And the first, I feel like, rehab Time video that I was like, committed to it, I remember I was still living in my mom's house. I was living in her guest room. And it was called. How would. I'm trying to think of the name. It wasn't called Faith Think it's called Faith It Out. I don't remember the title, but I think it was called Faith It Out.
Is it still up or did you take it?
No matter fact, it's not called Faith It. I was called Free Yourself. That's what it was. Free Yourself. And I believe it's still up. If you dive back into the YouTube files, it's still there.
Okay.
And I was recording on my imac that I had in there. And back then I would like. I mean, I was just trying to be so perfect, like, you know, just trying to make sure everything was right. And so when I look back at those videos, I kind of cringe. But at the same time, same time, like, man, that's where I started at, you know, so that was my first time doing that and then got to a point where I just started picking up my iPhone and just started speaking from my heart. And I didn't have, like, you know, some. So I used to think, I have to have this production. I have to have this and that, and those things are awesome and incredible. But I realized I just needed to have my truth, my reality and just. Just my soul to pick up a phone and inspire people. And so the videos that started to go viral were, you're perfect for the heart that's meant to love you and know your circle and those videos, like. Cause at first I was getting like, you know, maybe, I don't know, 100 views. And that was a lot for me and for people out there. If you're impacting 100 people with those views, that is a lot. But to see it now is just incredible. And those videos went viral. And those videos went viral after I officially quit football, literally, like, two months, I was still trying to play arena football. I was still trying to hang on. I let go of that. And I kid you not, Joe, like, two, three months later, those videos took off.
Why do you think that is?
I just think that, you know, just with my faith, I just feel like it was just God speaking to me, saying, you know what? You're trying to hold on to this thing out of fear. And I was. I was. Fear of financial security. That's how I was getting paid. Fear of my identity, like, who would I be without football, even though I didn't love it no more. And I think a lot of people, we hold on to things that we. That we don't love anymore. We aren't in love with those things anymore out of the fear. And so when I let go, it was like, okay, you're taking a step. And now the rope bridge was cut off, too. So I had no. I couldn't go back. You know, I couldn't go back. The rope bridge was cut off. And literally, people thought I was crazy. I mean, my friends thought I was crazy. My mom and my dad kind of thought. They didn't say it, but I know they were like, are you sure? Because I had a family to provide for. And I was like, I don't know how I'm gonna do it. I don't know what's going to happen, but I know this is the purpose for my life. Because when I was on that stage, I'm not going to go through that whole story. But when I was on the stage speaking to 3,000 kids, my very first big speaking engagement, I didn't want to do it. I was nervous. And on that stage is where I found myself, because I prepared. The whole night before, I prepared this long layout. I knew it like a rap verse. But as soon as I stepped on stage, I went blank. And at that point, I was like, I can either sink or I can swim. And I said, God, use me. So a lot of people ask, like, where do you get your speaking from the heart style and just your passion? It was in that moment because I had nothing to lean on except my story and myself. And, you know, with kids, you can't fool kids. They'll let you know, like, quick, you know, a youth. And at that moment is when I realized, like, man, I still had confidence in the midst of fear. I still had power in the midst of my weakness at that moment. And so I said, this has to be what I was created to do in my life. And at that moment is when I made those calls and called my coach, told them I'm not coming, called my friends, called my parents, and that's when rehab time really started.
Wow. Wow.
So let me ask you about. Because you weave a lot of God into your videos, and I always tend to try to bring it up because I sit and think of who are the listeners here that are atheists that don't resonate at all with God. And, you know, my background, I was. My mother was a former nun. She actually left the convent because she had gotten ill and met my father in church and ended up getting married. And I was raised Catholic. And my experience with it was very negative. And even to the point where this whole notion of God with all of the being molested as a kid, my mother dying, lots of abuse, lots of things that happen, you know, it wasn't until later in adult life where I realized I have a real issue with this whole God thing. And even though I spent thousands of hours of my life praying and going to church every day when I went to Catholic school, you know, I just could not feel this connection with this source. And so to this day, you know, I always am a little suspect when someone is so hardcore about what they think God is, because, you know, there's many different perceptions of that. The real question is to not go into trying to describe God because, you know, you're going to have a million different versions. It's more about faith. And so what does God mean to you and where does this faith come from? Because I think a lot of times people have a real, you know, your messages. I don't care what anyone, you know, if they're religious, spiritual atheists, they're so, so much good in what it is that you share. And what I don't want to do is have someone either cut themselves off because they're like, oh, they hear this charged word, which is very positive for some people and extremely negative for others. So I'd love to get your perspective.
On that for sure. And I always tell people, like you said, I mean, people who follow me, I've had Muslims, atheists and everything. And I think they look at the message and take what they need and leave what they don't. And they respect my beliefs. You know, that's what I'm always a respecter of people's beliefs and only can speak about just in my life. Of course, I was raised around it. My dad's a pastor and my grandmother, all those Things. But it wasn't until two situations happened in my life that really made me draw me closer to God. One was when I was six, seven years old. I had a real bad asthma condition. Of course, it's a lot better now with more knowledge I have. But living in New Orleans with that humidity, I mean, I take breathing treatments every night. It was bad. It got to a point where I was coughing so bad that my blood vessels turned white. I mean, my white around my eyes, my blood vessels popped, so all the white was red. And so I would go to school, and that's the first time I get bullied. Second grade, they're calling me, like, devil boy, all these things. And I was sick, and my mom, you know, my mother didn't know. The doctor gave us a suppressing cough medicine, which made it worse. And my mother said, you know, something. Told her God, you know, for her, told her, you know, through a friend, like, hey, take that baby to the hospital. Like, literally on the way to the hospital, I get there, I get in the er, and I still remember, like, it was yesterday. They put me down and my mom leaves the room, and there's this one guy across the table, his son had just got shot. And I stopped breathing. You know, stop breathing, gone. Pretty much the only thing I remember is them bringing me back. But the guy was watching me. Went and told my mom, and they brought me back, Whatever. Like, that at that moment is when I felt, like, just my connection with God. Honestly, just in that moment, I felt him. It's kind of hard to explain. I couldn't put it into words, but I felt him in that moment. And another moment was, of course, just me hitting my rock bottom and just me giving me this purpose. Like, you know, it's so hard for me to explain, like, rehab time and how everything's going and things like that. But only that I can say is I just know it's the call that God has for my life. When I speak, I feel like he's flowing through me and all of these things. I mean, I think I'm an intelligent person, but I don't think I'm as incredible as people may put it on me. I think it's just the incredible God that I serve, you know, so that's what God is for me, like, just my experiences through life. And when I look back, my faith isn't built upon, like, what could happen in the future. My faith is built upon what has happened in my life. And so every time I look back, and people can call it coincidence that they believe that or whatever it may be, but every time I look back in my life, everything added up to this moment. I had to go through the NFL, I learned so many things to put me in this moment. Friendships that it's just so hard to explain. Even how we met, you know, everything had to happen to get to this moment. Every time I look back, you know, my faith just gets stronger and stronger from that. And so that's what faith means to me, honestly.
Yeah, well. And I think to be void of faith in any particular area, not that you can't get through it, just it's a heck of a lot more painful.
Right.
And what's interesting too is because of so much time that I have spent in recovery and with people that there are, I see some people that just not only don't believe in God, they hate the notion of it, and they hate people that even have that belief and so part of it. And there's so many people that are quote, unquote religious that, you know, let's take Jesus. Even though you can look at God as many, many different sources where they seem to be the antithesis of what his message appears to be, you know, which is totally non accepting. And so I think part of it is just accepting others and accepting yourself, which without having to be like, oh, you know, I'm going to invalidate that person because of that. Because it's real easy to point fingers at any part of a person or what they do that you don't like. And if you want the world to change, good luck with trying to change the world. You got to change the way you look at the world, the way you experience the world.
And so I even think too, I mean, just to like, I mean, love. I mean, I think love is of course a universal language. And that's something I try to get people into. Funny you said that because. And it's true, you know, even when it comes to Christians, and I say this all the time, is that, you know, we could be some of the most judgmental people ever. Like, even with myself, like you go to my page, it's like, Trent, you know, you have. I have one lady tell me I don't dress Christian enough. You know, I'm like, what is that? You know, I wear sandals, you know, so I see so much judgmental stuff and I think keeps people away. But I always say this to just, to, you know, believers that I talk to, I say, you know, don't let the imperfections of man keep you from the perfection of God. Yeah, you Know, And I think you have to understand that. And we blame. Even me, I blame God for my situation so much. I blame God for this. I blame God for that. But I was never taking the responsibility. I mean, we live in an evil world with people who do certain things, you know, and we have to take the responsibility also.
So I remember when we were doing yoga at my house a few months ago, and so someone out of the blue just starts saying, yoga is like, some. And it's like, we're doing a yoga class, you know, My friend gives that too.
Yeah, I'm just like, honestly, that's my best connection with God. Everything is what you make it. I feel like personally, you know, whether. Whatever opinion, whatever, everybody has an opinion. People tell you that some water is bad for you. I'm just like, what? So, you know, everything is bad, you know, so you just gotta take your experiences for yourself. And I think as long as you operate in love, man, I think it works out awesome.
What's the mission currently behind rehab?
Time.
Just to renew every heart and body. You know, I want to give people worth. That's my thing. I mean, know your worth tour. But I want people to understand that they have worth. I mean, that's my message. Regardless of what's going on outside of you, I want you to know that you're an incredible person. Don't let what's going on outside of you define what's inside of you. So that's my mission, man. Just to get people to understand their worth.
Yeah.
Great.
What are some of the most valuable life lessons that you've learned?
Oh, man, I think one is facing your reality. I can share this. The three Rs, you know, facing your reality is one. And I always say, you know, you'll never win your award by running from your battles. I talked about it at the tour. I think so many times we run away because of fear, whatever it may be. But when you step and face whatever it is, that battle or whatever, that fear, you overcome it. You realize you gain a strength that you never knew you had, you know? So I think a lot of people, a lot of times we need to face our reality, whatever that is. You don't have to become your reality in that sense, but you have to face it, you know, and you can grow from that. I think another lesson was release. You know, whether it's friendships, and I don't always promote that, but the release, the toxic things from your life. You know, people say don't burn bridges, I definitely agree, but I feel like there Are certain bridges you need to burn, you know, that you can't afford to go back to. So releasing things from your life, it taught me that I had to change my environment. As I always say, you know, you don't blame a flower when it doesn't blossom or bloom. What do you do? You fix the environment. So sometimes it's not always you, sometimes it is what's around you. And so I have to change that. And last, just repairing your life, whatever that means to you, whether it's seminars, whether it's mentorship, whether it's digging up the bad seeds that's been in your life since you were born, that was given unto you, and digging up those things and replacing those things with seeds of faith and seeds of power. So I go through that pretty much every single day. I think that's what my struggle has taught me and that's what I try to teach other people.
Great. You said something just briefly here about battles, and then during your tour you were talking about, I wrote it down here. Silent battles are the hardest ones to fight and to get help. And it made me think about just being an addict because I think people that struggle with addictions and my viewpoint of addictions are, you know, the bigger question is my friend Gabor Mate, who will be at my conference this year with you. He's one of the top addiction doctors in the world. He says, you know, the question is not why the addiction, but why the pain? And so I think addictions are just symptoms in ways to cope with repressed emotions, trauma, deep seated pain. And you use it as a coping mechanism until it ends up becoming an addiction. Then it becomes a full fledged addiction, which I believe is beyond choice. That's where you tap into a higher power, be it whatever your version of God is or a community or something that you can drive some sort of hope for from. Because hope heals in silence, though battling things in silence, I think it's just toxic shame. And recently there was a famous rock star who committed suicide that had millions of dollars, that had millions of fans all over the world. And this person, in their silent battle, still was not able to reach out enough to where it could bring to this person. And this person killed themselves. Silent battles are insidious. They are terrible. And almost everyone goes through it in some sort of way. And a lot of people, they just cannot ask for help because of either the shame of what was done to them or the shame of what they have done to someone else, or at least perceive what they have had done is so Horrible that I can never talk about it. I mean, we have a dear friend of mine who's sitting in the room that, like, was, you know, had a lot of sexual abuse in her life and openly speaks about it. What. What is a silent battle? And someone watching or listening to this right now, that's like, I can never tell anybody about this. I mean, I. There's just no way. What. What is it? And how do you ask for help if you're fighting that silent battle?
The best way I can describe is, like you said. I mean, it's wanting to reach out for help. It's screaming for help. And you think this is my opinion. You think people can see it? You think people can hear you, right? It's screaming loud inside of you. But whether people are busy, whether people overlook it, people don't see it. And in my life, through my silent battles, that's what was going on. You know, I would always say I would smile for the camera but die behind the scenes. But I just felt like I just wanted somebody to be like, trent, I see what you're going through. But nobody ever really asked. And if they did ask, it was this stigma as a man, and I had to be strong. I can't show my weaknesses. You know, we're taught that growing up so much, and for people out there, and also, it's this, too. It's also feeling isolated. You feel like nobody would understand. You feel like you're going to be judged. You feel like nobody goes through what you're going through. And so not to take away somebody's struggle, because struggles are extremely powerful, but don't make your struggle special in the sense of. It's just for me, because I realized that, I mean, doing what we do, I see it every day. There's no story. I really haven't heard that. A lot of people go through a lot of things, and I can promise you that somebody is going through what you're going through, or they've overcame what you're going through. And so it's important to find someone, even if it's someone you don't know. You know, that's why a lot of people hit me up and say, trent, I don't really know you, but I don't want to be judged. They know I'm not going to judge them, and they talk. So find somebody that maybe you don't know. Find a mentor, like, reach out to somebody. Find a stranger, whatever it may be. Watch videos and reach out to somebody, because those things will kill you inside, period. But you have to also realize, too, in overcoming that silent battle, as I said earlier, you turn your pain into power, and then you become the person that helps other people get through it. You know, I get this a lot, Joe. A lot of people will say, it's easy for you to say, Trent, you know, whether it's hiking Camelback Mountain or me speaking about faith, me speaking about overcoming, it's easy for you to say. And I used to kind of get offended by that. I'm like, you don't know my life. You don't know what I go through. Then I say, wait. It is easy for me to say, because I know you can overcome it, because I overcame it. That's why I talk with so much confidence and power and certainty, because I know if I can come out of that, you can, too. And so I always say, you know, there's a bigger purpose than your pain. And I think if you think that if you hold on, as you said, a little bit of hope, a little bit of faith, you can get through that silent battle, period. But give your pain a voice. And not a voice of, you know, sympathy or whatever it may be, but give your pain a voice by speaking out to someone, even if it's a stranger, somebody you don't know. Because the worst thing you can do is hold everything inside, because eventually the lid, the top pops off, you know, as you suppress more and more things.
Yeah, that's really. Yeah, that's really powerful. I was in Seattle earlier in the week, and one of the days I wanted to go to this clothing store where they sold outdoor gear, because I went and spent time on an island with Peter Diamandis. He's one of my friends and clients. And so it's kind of funny, when I travel, I'll carry, like, you know, avocados and different food and stuff. And so I'm walking to this place, and there's homeless people all over the area where I was at in downtown Seattle. And I walked by, this gal who's just kind of got her head down and just put food next to her and just walk off because she wasn't even looking up, although she had a cardboard sign that says, mental illness need Help walked by. And I'm not an expert on homelessness, and I see it everywhere, and it always bothers me. But it's same time, there's YouTube videos from people on how to make $300,000 a year being a panhandler. And it's just like, what is real? And having gotten so much in addiction, I know A lot of homelessness is addiction and mental illness. And so I go to the store and literally buy about $1,200 worth of clothes because I can. And so I walk out of there, and this is probably 30 minutes later. And I walk right past this person, and I kind of look down, and she's smoking a cigarette really, like, anxiously. Almost looks like she's on meth. And I cross the street. And then I was like, it just bothered me. And there's, like, homeless people everywhere. But for some reason, I just kind of gravitated towards that. What the hell is going on with this person? And I just couldn't get out. So I walked back as. As far across the street, and I go up to her and I say, hello, how are you doing? And she's like, you know, she's. I'm just. Immediately went into this shitty place, and I literally sat down and started talking with her and said, you know, how long have you been homeless? And she. Five years. She's been in Seattle. She's been homeless for five years there. And that she has a massive anxiety disorder and that she cannot hold a job. And she's like, all these people walk by, no one even pays attention. No one comes and talks to me. I need money. And her teeth at the bottom of her mouth were so ground down that there were just little stumps. And this was truly a person that was not faking it. I mean, she had dirty fingernails, very weathered, and just having a hard life. And just, you know, I said, well, is there any resources here? And she's telling me about how the homeless shelters are bad and about how they give you a cop. And again, I have to put myself in those sort of situations where, you know, I have no idea what her mental illness is. I have no idea her ability to come up with solutions. You know, if someone's dealing with a severe mental illness, you know, you have no idea that. I mean, people that, like, well, why don't they do this? Why don't they. That, well, maybe their brains don't have that capability of figuring out step by step, what to do or, you know, why don't they go be homeless in a place where there's nice weather? Maybe their brain doesn't conjure that sort of stuff up. But I was just sitting there, you know, thinking that this woman in her mind, I mean, it was very painful. So I said, and have you ever been to, like, is there any support groups? I gotta imagine there's some places to go to. And the only thing that I Could think of is all the support groups that are available for addiction. You know, and even if you're not an addict, there's all kinds of open meetings. And so I started, you know, she was raped repeatedly while she was a little girl. And she literally told me her whole story, and it was just heartbreaking. But it's also, almost everyone out on the street has those sort of stories, and there's millions of people with all of this stuff. And I always go back to the starfish story. There's many different ways that I've heard this story told. But the quick version is a man sees a little kid down at the ocean bending over, throwing things in the water, gets close to him and, you know, sees a little kid and, you know, says, son, what are you doing? The little kid's like, well, I'm throwing starfish that have washed up on the shore into the ocean. He's like, well, you know, there's, you know, thousands of starfish on the ocean, and they're all going to die. You can't throw them all in the ocean. He's like, what difference do you think you can make? And the little kid reaches down, picks up a starfish, throws it into the ocean. He's like, well, it made a difference for that one, you know, and it's like, that one, just one sort of difference. And, you know, and I sit in, like, I'm sitting there talking to this person saying, well, what can I possibly do? I can give her some money, which I did. And, you know, but at the end of the day, it doesn't solve the thing. And I'm like, how do you literally make a really sort of lasting impact to someone? And the fact is, you can always. But what you can do is a little bit. And so I looked up online because I asked her if she had a cell phone. She had an old Motorola cell phone, flip phone. She couldn't even go online and look at things. And she has to get enough money from literally panhandling in order to be able to pay this bill. Someone had given her the phone. She had told me. And I went into a Bank of America, which was like a few doors down, went and wrote on because I didn't have a pen and paper on me. And I looked up on my phone different coda meetings, like co dependence, anonymous emotions, anonymous open meetings where someone doesn't even need to be an addiction. I wanted to try to. And I wrote the addresses down. I found some. And I gave her three different addresses, and I found three different women that are in support groups that would just take phone calls. And I wrote all this down and gave it to her and I left. And you know, and I don't know if she'll call those people. I don't know if she'll be able to go to the meetings. But I was just sitting there going, you know, the interesting thing is that I've seen videos online where some well to do person will dress up like a homeless person, lay down on the ground, and then no one, like for hours will film it. And you might have a couple of people that will go up to them and you know, see if they need any, you know, need anything. But then if you get. Take a guy in a suit that looks clean and lay that same person down in the middle of New York City, all kinds of people walk up. And it's just how we become numb to other people's pain is almost like invisible. And it's like, fuck, what do you do about that sort of stuff? And so those are the things that bother me. Those are the things that keep me up at night. And so with things like Joe Volunteer, which has been started by a guy named Chip Franks in Killian, Texas, which is like Uber for volunteers, I'm like, that's how I want to be a catalyst to that sort of stuff. So we can maybe shift. You know, if Joe Volunteer was in play, there's a ton of people that would go out and help those sort of people. You know, recovery centers, animal shelters, assisted living homes where people have to sit alone. And so I want to bring this back to, you know, I look at a guy like you and I won't go into this whole story, but I had someone call me last night that I shared with you earlier that had started drinking again. That was. And I sent her one of your videos because it was fresh in my mind. And I just saw you last night and you just drip hope on the people. You give them inspiration and it's really power. And I think that's why you're blowing up right now. I think that's why. And I actually think you are a guy that will not only inspire people, help them make decisions and careers, jobs, relationships, family, like you say, you know, love people from a distance, even if you can't be close to them. But I also believe you're a guy that can save lives. I believe your message can get people to do things they typically would not do because you have this great ability to instill hope and you make it available to people for free.
I think we want to start by you talking about this thing that Timothy gave us yesterday.
Yeah, I was just looking at the concepts that Tim used to structure the entire two days. I said, that's great. But the one thing I want to tell you is that what I've observed in myself and working with entrepreneurs is that it's how you measure your life that really makes a difference. And the one thing that's really built into the human brain is that we're measurers. And they know that probably within a couple of days, a newborn baby has immediately noticed the distinction between its mother and any other shapes that there are in the vicinity. So right from the very start, we measure things because it's crucial to learning. We have to know the difference between things, and we have to know things that are good for us, things that aren't bad for us. And this comes from measuring. And so whether you feel good about your life or you don't feel good about your life, regardless of how it looks from the outside. So I, you know, Babs and I, from the very beginning, went for, by comparison, super successful entrepreneurs, okay? So, you know, I think that from an income standpoint, just to qualify for the program, you're not only in the top 1% of the world, but you'd probably be in the top 1/10 of 1%, you know? And so the other thing is that these are outliers. These people are all outliers. There's nothing about where they were born, who they were born to, that really explains what they've done with their lives. They're kind of freaks. Kind of freaks. And actually, the biggest inequality in the US Is not between families. The biggest inequality in the US Is actually within families. Families. There's one person in the family that goes through the roof, okay? And so there's a lot of inequality that's involved with superstar entrepreneurs. And I should say that about halfway through the last project, the Gap in the GAIN book, I said, you know, Ben, we need a target reader. We have to have a target reader, okay? So that we're not talking to everybody in the world. We're just talking to. To one reader. So we did this and we talked about it, and I said, tucker Max is our target reader. And we talk about Tucker Max came day he was born. He was setting goals, total goal setter. You don't teach Tucker anything about goal setting. You don't teach Tucker anything about achievement. He had four New York Times bestseller books before he was 30 years old. One of them had been made into a movie, went to Duke, got His law degree in publishing law. Never went to class once while he was at Duke to get his law degree. And they passed a law in the United States after that that no law student can get their law degree without going to class. Okay. And I'd met him, and you've met him, and I said, God, talented guy. But you could never bring him home to polite company. I mean, you. He had one word that he used about once out of every five words that I just couldn't have that being said over and over again in polite company. So I said, tucker just has everything to be a super achiever. He just missed all the classes on being happy. So we talked about this, and then we talked to Tucker. And so Ben says, do you think that's really true? I said, well, I'll just write him an email. And I just wrote the whole thing. And Tucker came back. He said, this is so bad word true. You can't believe it. Bad word. So the whole point about it is that you can be successful by everybody else's standards. In other words, that you can be a super achiever and not have any of that experience yourself for your entire life. For your entire life. And it's because you're measuring wrong. So that's really what we're trying. We're just going to show you that there's only two ways of measuring what you're doing in life, and it's a switch in your brain. And for some reason, it got switched one way if you're not happy and you can switch it back, and that switch can happen in a matter of hours. Okay, so I have about 20,000 entrepreneurs who kind of got. I mean, not all of them get it. I mean, some people are really committed to their unhappiness. And no, and I mean human. Humans are strange. You never know what they're going to be committed to. But anyway, so Ben, your take on that. Because Ben chooses the book. So Ben not only writes the books, but he gets to, you know, he chooses because Ben has a better sense of the major market, book market than I do. And therefore, whatever idea we work on next, it's Ben's job to pick the next one. Yeah.
So just to give a little bit of context, and then in a minute, I'll have Gina or Rakima or whoever share kind of the core diagram. But when I first read the Gap, and again, it was Dan's Little Book, probably 2018, this was before Dan and I actually fully established a collaboration. It was very clear to me, this single framework, if applied can basically, it essentially applies all of the best of all the research in psychology that I've studied as far as positive psychology and things like that. And so that was actually the book that I was more interested in writing even than who not how, but strategically who not how was the best book to write. And it really is a core strategic coach concept. And Dan and I were thinking. So the three books that immediately I wanted to write with Dan were who not how, the Gap and the gain and 10x is easier than 2x. And Dan and I. And I wasn't sure which book to do after who not how, 10x is easier than 2x or the gap in the Gain. And so Dan and I had conversations and we thought there's really no use in teaching entrepreneurs how to maximize their growth and to go 10x 10x 10x if they're going to stay in the gap the whole way. And so that's why we did Gap and gain here. 10x is easier than 2x will come out next year, but just as a mindset model. And I'll let Dan explain his structure in a quick second. You're never going to feel successful if you're in the gap. It does not matter how successful you actually are. Your current situation is not what changes. What we're going to help you understand is how to relook at your current situation so that you're always in the game. You're always, as Dan just described, you're always actually the master. If you're in the gap, you're never the master because you're making your ideal in the future, the person you hope to become an unreachable target that you're always chasing. And that's an endless path to nowhere.
Her teeth at the bottom of her mouth were so ground down that there were just little stumps. And this was truly a person that was not faking it. I mean, she had dirty fingernails, very weathered, and just having a hard life. And just, you know, I said, well, is there any resources here? And she's telling me about how the homeless shelters are bad and about how they give you a cop. And again, I have to put myself in those sort of situations where, you know, I have no idea what her mental illness is. I have no idea her ability to come up with solutions. You know, if someone's dealing with someone severe mental illness, you have no idea that people that like, well, why don't they do this? Why don't they that, well, maybe their brains don't have that capability of figuring out step by Step what to do or why don't they go be homeless in a place where there's nice weather? Maybe their brain doesn't conjure that sort of stuff up. But I was sitting there thinking that this woman in her mind, I mean, it was very painful. So I said, have you ever been to, like, is there any support groups? I gotta imagine there's some places to go to. And the only thing that I could, you know, think of is all the support groups that are available for addiction, you know, and even if you're not an addict, there's all kinds of open meetings. And so I started, you know, she was raped repeatedly while she was a little girl. And she literally told me her whole story, and it was just heartbreaking. But it's also, almost everyone out on the street has those sort of stories, and there's millions of people with all of this stuff. And I always go back to the starfish story. There's many different ways that I've heard this story told. But the quick version is a man sees a little kid down at the ocean, bending over, throwing things in the water. Gets close to him and, you know, sees a little kid and, you know, says, son, what are you doing? The little kid's like, well, I'm throwing starfish that have washed up on the shore into the ocean. He's like, well, you know, son, there's, you know, thousands of starfish on the ocean, and they're all gonna die. You can't throw them on the ocean. He's like, what difference do you think he could make? And the little kid reaches down, picks up a starfish, throws it into the ocean. He's like, well, it made a difference for that one. Do you think he could make? And the little kid reaches down, picks up a starfish, throws it into the ocean. He's like, well, it made a difference for that one, you know, and it's like, that one. Just one sort of difference. And, you know, and I sitting, like, I'm sitting there talking to this person, saying, well, what can I possibly do? I can give her some money, which I did. But at the end of the day, it doesn't solve the thing. And I'm like, how do you literally make a really sort of lasting impact to someone? And the fact is, you can always. But what you can do is a little bit. And so I looked up online because I asked her if she had a cell phone. She had an old Motorola cell phone, flip phone. She couldn't even go online and look at things. And she has to pay she has to, you know, and it's like that one. Just one sort of difference. And, you know, and I sitting, like I'm sitting there talking to this person saying, well, what can I possibly do? I can give her some money, which I did get enough money from literally panhandling in order to be able to pay this bill. Someone had given her the phone, she had told me, and I went into a Bank of America, which was like a few doors down, went and wrote on because I didn't have a pen and paper on me. And I looked up and, you know, I. But at the end of the day, it doesn't solve the thing. And I'm like, on my phone, different coda meetings, like co dependence, anonymous emotions, anonymous open meetings where someone doesn't even need to be an addict. I wanted to try to say, and I wrote the addresses down. You know, how do you. How do you literally make a really sort of lasting impact to someone? Found someone. I gave her three different addresses and I found three different women that are in support groups that would just take phone calls. And I wrote all this down and gave it to her and I left. And, you know, and I don't know if she'll call those people. I don't know if she'll be able to go to the meetings. But I was just sitting there going, you know, the interesting thing is that I've seen videos online where some like, well, to do person will dress up like a homeless person, lay down on the ground, and then no one, like for hours will film it. And you might have a couple of people that will go up to them and, you know, see if they need any, you know, need anything. But then if you take a guy in a suit that looks clean and lay that same person down in the middle of New York City, all kinds of people walk up. And it's just how we become numb to other people's pain is almost. They're like invisible. And it's like, fuck, what do you do about that sort of stuff? And so those are the things that bother me. Those are the things that keep me up at night. And so with things like Joe Volunteer, which has been started by a guy named Chip Franks in Killian, Texas, which is like Uber for volunteers, I'm like, that's how I want to be a catalyst to that sort of stuff. So we can maybe shift. You know, if Joe Volunteer was in play, there's a ton of people that would go out and help those sort of people. You know, recovery centers, animal shelters, assisted. And the fact Is you can't always, you know, unless. But what you can do is a little bit and living homes where people have to sit alone. And so I want to bring this back to, you know, I look at a guy like you, and I won't go into this whole story, but I had someone call me last night that I share with you. So I looked up online because I asked her if she had a cell phone. She had a earlier that had started drinking again. And I sent her one of your videos because it was fresh old Motorola cell phone, flip phone. She couldn't even go online and look at things, and she has to pay. She has to buy mine. And I just saw you last night, and you just drip hope on the picture. People, you give them inspiration, and it's really power. And I think that's why you're blowing up right now. I think that's why. And I actually think you are a guy that will get enough money from literally panhandling in order to be able to pay this bill. Someone to not only inspire people, help them make decisions in careers, jobs, relationships, family, like you say, you know, love people from a distance, even if you can't be close to them. But I also believe you're a guy that can save lives. I believe your message can get people to do things they typically would not do because you have this great ability to instill hope and you make it available to people for free.
I think we wanted to start by you talking about this thing that Timothy gave us yesterday.
Yeah, I was just looking at the concepts that Tim used to structure the entire two days. I said, that's great. But the one thing I want to tell you is that what I've observed in myself and working with entrepreneurs is that it's how you measure your. Your life that really makes a difference. And the one thing that's really built into the human brain is that we're measurers. And they know that probably within a couple of days, a newborn baby has immediately knows the distinction between its mother and any other shapes that there are in the vicinity. So right from the very start, we measure things.
Given her the phone, she had told me, and I went into a Bank.
Of America, which was because it's crucial to learning. We have to know the difference between things, and we have to know things that are good for us, things that aren't bad for us. And this comes from measuring. And so whether you feel good about your life or you don't feel good about your life, regardless of how it looks from the outside, like a Few.
Doors down, went and wrote on because I didn't have a pen and paper on me. And I looked up.
So I, you know, Babs and I from the very beginning went for, by comparison, super successful entrepreneurs. Okay? So, you know, I take that from an income standpoint just to qualify on.
My phone, different code of meetings like co dependence Anonymous, emotions Anonymous open qualify for the program.
You're not only in the top 1% of the world, but you'll probably be.
In the top meetings where someone doesn't even need to be an addict. I wanted to try to say.
And I wrote the addresses down 1/10 of 1%. And so the other thing is that these are outliers. These people are all outliers. There's nothing about their. Where they were born, you know, who they were born to that really explains what they've done with their lives. It's. They're kind of freaks, you know, kind of freaks. And actually the biggest inequality in the US is not between families. The biggest inequality in the US is actually within families. There's one person in the family that goes through the roof, okay? And so there's a lot of inequality that's involved with superstar entrepreneurs. And I should say that about halfway through the last project of the Gap in the GAIN book, I said, you know, Ben, we need a target reader. We have to have a target reader, okay? So that we're not talking to everybody in the world. We're just talking to one reader. So we did this and we talked about it and I said, found some.
And I gave her three different addresses and I found three different women that are in support groups that would just take.
Tucker Max is our target reader. And we talked about Tucker Max came day he was born. He was setting goals. Double goal setter. You don't teach Tucker anything about goal setting. You don't teach phone calls.
And I wrote all this down and gave it to her and I left. And you know, and I don't teach.
Tucker anything about achievement. He had four New York Times bestseller books before he was 30 years old. One of them had been made into a movie. Went to Duke, got his law degree in publishing law. Never went to class once while he was at Duke to get his law degree. And they passed a law in the United States after that that no law.
Know if she'll call those people? I don't know if she'll be able to go to the meetings. But I was just sitting there going, you know, the interesting thing is that I've seen videos online where some like, well, to do person will dress up like a homeless.
A student can get their law degree without going to class. Okay. And I'd met him, and you've met him. And I said, God, talented guy. But you could never bring him home to polite company. I mean, you. He had one word that he used about once out of every five words that I just couldn't have that being said over and over again in polite company. So I said, tucker just has everything to be a super achiever. He just missed all the classes on being happy. So we talked about this, and then we talked to Tucker. And so Ben says, do you think that's really true? I said, well, I'll just write him an email. And I just wrote the whole thing. And Tucker came back. He said, this is so bad. Word true. You can't believe it.
This person lay down on the ground and then no one, like for hours will film it. And you might have.
Bad words. So the whole point about it is.
That a couple of people that will go up to them and, you know, see if they need any, you know.
But you can be successful by everybody else's standards. In other words, that you can be a super achiever and not have any of that experience yourself for your entire life. For your entire life. And it's because you're measuring wrong. So that's really what we're talking. We're just going to show you that there's only two ways of measuring what you're doing in life. And it's a switch in your brain.
But then if you take a guy in a suit that looks clean and lay that same person down in the middle of New York City, all kinds of people walk up and it's just how we become numb to other people's pain.
Some reason it got switched one way. If you're not happy and you can switch it back and that switch can happen in a matter of hours. Okay. So I have about 20,000 entrepreneurs who kind of got that. I mean, not all of them get it. I mean, some people are really committed to their unhappiness. And I mean, humans are strange. You never know what they're going to be committed to. But anyway, so Ben, your take on that. Because Ben chooses the book. So Ben not only writes the books, but he gets to, you know, he chooses. Because Ben has a better sense of the major market, book market than I do. And therefore, whatever book, whatever idea we work on next, it's Ben's job to pick the next one.
Yeah. So just to give a little bit of context and Then in a minute I'll have Gina or Rakim or whoever share kind of the core diagram. But when I first read the Gap, and again, it was Dan's Little Book, probably 2018, this was before Dan and I actually fully established a collaboration. It was very clear to me this single framework, if applied, can basically, it essentially applies all of the best of all the research in psychology that I've studied as far as positive psychology and things like that. And so that was actually the.
Is almost like invisible. And it's like, fuck, you know, what do you. What do you do about that book.
That I was more interested in writing even than who not how, but strategically who not how was the best book to write. And it really is a core strategic coach concept. And Dan and I were thinking. So the three books that immediately I wanted to write with Dan were who not how, the Gap and the gain and 10x is easier than 2x, and Dan and I. And I wasn't sure which book to do after who not how, 10x, that sort of stuff.
And so those are the things that bother me. Those are the things that keep me up at night.
10X is easier than 2x or the gap in the Gain. And so Dan and I had conversations and we thought there's really no use in teaching entrepreneurs how to maximize their growth and to go 10x 10x 10x if they're going to stay in the Gap the whole way. And so that's why we did Gap.
With things like Joe Volunteer, which has been started by a guy named Chip Franks in Killian, Texas, which is like Uber for volunteers. I'm like, that's how I want to be a catalyst to that sort of stuff.
10X is easier than 2x will come out next year, but just as a mindset model. And I'll let Dan explain his structure in a quick second. You're never going to feel successful if you're in the Gap. It does not matter how successful you actually are. Your current situation is not what changes. What we're going to help you understand is how to relook at your current situation so that you're always in the game. You're always, as Dan just described, you're always actually the master. If you're in the Gap, you're never the master because you're making your ideal in the future, the person you hope to become an unreachable target that you're always chasing. And that's. That's an endless path to nowhere. So how about we share the screen? Gina or Rakim show the diagram and then Dan out. We really only have probably, like, 15 more minutes, and then we'll do a QA. So how about you just basically explain. And a lot of these people have actually already read the gap in the gain. A lot of them are core students of yours, but maybe just from your standpoint, share what you want them to know.
Yeah. So the thing is that I show this to people and I said, you know, these two sides of this diagram are going to look very similar. So I'm going to go through the.
Gap, making it full screen.
Yeah. So we're going to go through the gap first. And the gap works this way. That we have a construct in the human brain which is called an ideal. Okay. And the reason we have that is because one of the fundamental things we have to come to grips with is time. Okay. And we have another model, what I call a mental construct in our brain which deals with space. And we've created a construct there called the horizon line, so that when you're outside, you have a reference point where the sky meets the ground. And that allows you to actually pick a point between where you are and the horizon so that you can actually measure a goal. And for some reason, we don't get really off track about this, that most children in a very short period of time get the horizon right, that it's not real, the horizon is not real. It's just a reference point. And they don't judge themselves by not reaching the horizon. They're quite comfortable, but with the ideal, they don't. And I would say that the majority of human beings never adjust to this because they've been told, you know, great people achieve their ideals. Achieve their ideals. But the ideal is just a mental construct that allows us to chunk off a period of time in our brain and then actually create an achievement which we call a goal, and actually move towards the goal and achieve the goal. Both sides do exactly what I've said. So you do that on the gap side and you do this on the gain side. So it's exactly identical. And all 8 billion. I think that's the current population. All 8 billion human beings are dealing with this every day. And I should say here that my greatest mastery that has come in relationship to the gap is that I only do it four or five times a day.
Hey, I hope you're enjoying this video. And I want to let you know that I have a new book that's come out, and if you'd like to get it absolutely free, there's a link below in the description, or you can wait till the end of this video, or you can Simply go to joe'sfreebook.com and you can get a copy there.
Okay. After 25 years of getting better at this, I only now do it four or five times a day where I judge myself against an ideal. So the thing I want to say, this is very natural to do this. And the only question is that you want to be aware that you're doing it because you'll immediately feel it as a tightness. Your muscles will tighten up, you'll feel a sense of urgency, you'll feel a sense of scarcity in your mind, you'll immediately feel that you're in the gap. And so what the person does is that they achieve their goal, and then they measure against the ideal, and nothing's changed. The ideal is further.
They're always here wanting to be there.
They're always here wanting to be there. And so other people see their achievement, what they've actually done, but they don't see it because they bounced it against the ideal. Okay? And they get unhappy, they're dissatisfied, they feel disappointed. And actually, some people can go into a permanent state of depression for this, okay? And so the whole thing is that every individual. And we're all on our own with this. There isn't anybody who can help us with this. You just got to get what the true measurement is. And so the gain looks exactly the same. Same. You have the ideal. And the ideals are important. Ideals are very important because they throw illumination on our future. And the other thing is they motivate us. And when times are really tough, it's our ideals that actually allow us to go through very difficult times, as many people have done over the last two years. Okay. And you have to go through that, but they're not for measurement. So on the gain side, you have the ideal, you see the goal, you start, and you have an achievement. And then instead of measuring against the ideal, you turn around, measure where you started. And every time you measure where you started, you feel good because you've made progress. May not have been all the progress that your ideal said you were going to make, but you always feel progress. So what I notice is that you become very, very masterful of your own progress. And so I would like to add to Tim's structure here, is that the real master that you want to follow is the master that's based on measuring your progress backwards. And every day you measure your progress backwards, you feel more masterful about your future.
Yeah. One thing I will Say, and this is something we discussed in the audiobook, by the way, and some of you probably already listened to it. The audiobook has about two and a half hours of interviews between me and Dan. One crucial thing to realize, and this is something we talked about, is you're not either in the gap or the gain. It's a commitment you have to make if you want to stay in the gap and continue to measure yourself and other people against unreachable ideals which are constantly moving and changing like the horizon. You're making happiness and success impossible for you, your team, everyone around you. And just as an example, personal for me, and I go in the gap, obviously, about myself regularly, and I can tell quickly when I go into the gap now, because I can clearly feel the physiology and just the depression of why am I not where I could be or should be or why did I do that incorrectly? Like, you know, whenever you start measuring yourself or your situation against what you thought it ideally could have been, you start to start to feel like a loser, no matter what you've done. But I've caught myself, you know, especially with our older three kids shifting from gap to gain. And I think this is very important with kids, if you're always measuring them against where you think that they could be or should be, you've made success an impossible adventure for them. And with, especially my oldest son, we got him as a foster kid, we got him out of a group home when he was seven years old. And I remember all three of those kids were so far behind in school. He was about two years behind in school. And I remember sitting with him and trying to teach him how to read for hours and hours and hours. And it's interesting because as he moves forward and as I move forward, my ideals continue to change for him. And, you know, if I were, he's now 14, very good reader, just brilliant in so many things. But if I'm constantly measuring him against my moving ideals for him, he gets no experience of his own progress. If I can help him see who he is right now against where he was a year ago or back when we were working on his reading, he can start to measure himself accurately, which is not against my ideals, but against his own progress. And so this is a fundamental mindset for yourself, for teams, for the people you're around. And this is something that Dan and I have talked about, but something he's found and you can talk to. But I think one thing that I really want to move to in a second, but one of the things he's found is that once an entrepreneur actually gets this and they start to help see their family or their team in the gain, sometimes it takes some time to overcome the psychological damage that was imposed by constantly putting the loved ones in the gap. And so that's not to like put pressure, but the gain is where you can start to get healing. And it really is, it's very good. One thing I just wanted to maybe, you know, and you can go wherever you want, Dan. But the thing that I think is helpful is kind of just helping people realize that the past is only theirs to decide that there's no value in beating up your former self. No value. And you know, as an example, if you didn't live the perfect day, you know, if I didn't achieve all my goals today and now I'm in the gap because it was a failure, maybe just talk about that. You are the owner of your own experience. Your experiences aren't the owner of you. I don't know if that or you can go wherever you want at this point. Dan.
Yeah, I think I'll follow your directions and go wherever I want. Exactly.
I'm going to go in the gap on that one.
The.
Yeah, I just want to tell you, you know, sometimes the stories are the things. So I had this client, brilliant guy, probably 10 years in coach, and he had gone to medical school and done everything except become a doctor. And he just at a certain point didn't want to become a. Didn't want to become a doctor. But he had valuable skills going through medical school. And he went into the insurance industry and created a company that was called Second Opinion. And it was having to do with the insurance underwriting for really wealthy people. And it's a real problem, as we have Susan here. And they deal at the top of the world market in terms of wealthy people getting life insurance. And one of the problems with the life insurance industry is the doctors who do the rating are mediocre. Doctors who follow strictly, you know, it's not based on wisdom, it's not based on knowledge, it's not based experience. They have checklists and you go through the checklist and do it. So what this person, his name is David. What David did is that he would, you know, bring in top notch specialists, medical specialists to the insurance company. And he says, we want a second opinion on this. And we're saying the way the doctor said is that he just applied a standard rule to something, but it doesn't take into account what the person's actual situation is. And in about 80% of the cases, he would get a reversal and the person would get rated, and then, you know, and so the insurance agent then would get paid, and they would get paid part of it, you know. And so that was his business, and he was tremendously good at it, you know, and many of you will deal with this situation, you know, in the future. So anyway, he was telling us his story because he came into the workshop and he learned the gap just as we're doing. This is 25 years ago. And he was the next quarter he came back and he was really, really, really kind of upset about something. And he told me, he said, you know, after I saw this, he says, I visited with my father and everybody's dead. I don't have siblings. My father is there. And we were sitting there at dinner and my father was just saying, what were you thinking? What were you thinking? And David says, what was I thinking about what, dad? He said, you went through four years of high school and you got 39 A's and one B. What were you thinking? Why couldn't you just work a little harder and get 40? This is 25 years after he graduated from high school. So for 25 years, his father is cavechian. Is that the right use? Caveching over the fact that his son could have been 40 as and he only got 39 as. 39 as. And I mean, it was a. Let's say it was a strained, strained rest of the conversation and evening, but he's going home and he asked for pull off to the side of the road and he realized what his father had just done to him, he was doing to his daughter. And it's a killer. I'll tell you, it's an absolute killer. And I've seen it over and over again. And it's funny. Richard Rossi with his thing. The reason why what Richard is talking about is really extraordinary is because we've never actually had a health care system. Only for the first time now are we having a health care system. Up until now, it's been a disease management system. Okay. And you know it because when you get your reports back, if you get a negative report back, it means they're not going to make any money. I'll say all the reports are negative. This is negative. This is negative. Okay, so what should be really positive for you is actually negative because they're not going to make any money on any of your diseases. And that's the entire healthcare system. I mean, how many of you experience that? And the doctor says, yeah, yeah, it looks pretty Good. This looks pretty good. This looks pretty good. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wish I could find something to charge you for rather than getting paid for. Wow. Another quarter and you're healthier than you've ever been. So the healthcare would be conversation about health, not what's wrong with you. But the big thing is that we live in a highly visual world right now, and we can talk. And we're getting teenagers today, especially right during the period when they've switched off their, you know, I mean, it's around 10 or 11 years old. You want to be a hero to your kids before 10, because at 10, they switch to a. They switch to peers as their judgment. So they start having that sideways communication. But now it's enabled with social media. Now it's, you know, and it's all the visual signs now. And they're going through their most vulnerable period. There's hormone change, and now they have to develop all sorts of social skills. And they're being presented with images about what they should look like and how successful they should be at 10, 11 years old. And they've got this extreme tendency to be judging themselves by the ideal. Okay? And, you know, it's a real problem. And we live in a highly visual and visual. Visual images are much faster to imprint our brains than any other image coming from the outside. But it's a human thing. Every human being has to deal with this. You have to come to grips with it. So if you can master this. Anytime that you feel yourself really feeling uptight about something you're doing and you're starting to judge yourself, you're in the gap, and you say, okay, where did this start? And the moment you go back to where this started, you said, oh, I'm further ahead than I thought. And immediately the pressure goes away. And so when I say I do it four or five times a day, I only stay with it for about a minute, and I immediately catch myself. It's like sailing, you know, I'm not on the straight line. I'm just tacking back and forth between it. I was divorced from bankrupt on the Same day in August 1978. Divorced in the morning. Got to keep my credit card for lunch. People are very considerate when you've been divorced and bankrupt on the same day. They don't bother you. They just give you massive amount of privacy. Take as long as you want. Take as long as you want. And I realized that the reason for both was that I wasn't telling myself what I really wanted. I was expecting other people to kind of indicate to me what my goals should be and what my achievements should be. But one of the things I noticed is that I was asking permission of other people about whether I was doing a really good job. And as long as I did that, I was always downplaying myself, actually criticizing myself. And so that's what I've been through. I mean, I've been through. I'm not going to go through the whole history, but during that period I started coaching really, really top notch entrepreneurs. And I just noticed as a coach that individuals who should have every reason in the world to feel proud about themselves and happy about their results weren't. And I had one in particular. He was a movie maker and really superb at his skills. And one day everybody else I could get them to say, yeah, that was a good quarter. I'm surprised, you know, now that I think about it, it was really not him. He never, never say it. And that diagram that you see up on the screen immediately came to me when I get really pissed off. I do diagrams. And that diagram popped out, the one you saw there, and I said, this is what you're doing. And everybody in the room except him got it. And he didn't last very long. He was with us another six months. But I began to see that for super high achievers who are outliers, you have to become master of your own measurement. You have to declare total ownership of your. Nobody gets to say how you're doing. You're the only person who gets to say how you're doing. And you got to use, you got to measure backwards. If you measure forwards, you're going to be very, very unhappy. And it's chronic. And then people develop all sorts of ways of coping with their unhappiness. Great thing that Joe said to me about two years ago, Joe Polish, he said, you know, the biggest problem with addictions is that people think it's a problem. Addictions are actually a solution. There's something more, a lot worse that you're doing the addiction. He says, until you understand that addictions are a solution, you'll never solve any. You'll never get to the real problem. The real problem is this negative lifetime constant measurement of yourself as not achieving your ideals. That's why you're drinking, that's why you're doing dangerous activity, that's why you're gambling, that's what you're doing. Because you can't win this game that goes on in your head every 24 hours. That. Yep. So. And then Ben, you know, Ben, what I love About Ben and Tamon, anything is that if you subtract his age from me, he still hasn't been born right. You still have about another 10, 11. But I really love the partnership with him. But one of the big things is Ben's got all the psychological models that support what we're doing here. That's one thing. And that's not my game. I mean, I would never spend the time to do it and, you know, so. But this has really. You've gone down the checklist of all the things that kind of explain this unhappiness. And this diagram really, really does.
Well, it's massive.
It's not perfect. It's not perfect. There's a few things that it doesn't.
No, I think it's a great, great concept. And we'll open this up to Q and A in just a quick second. But, yeah, I think one thing just that I wanted to share. Last thought for me and, you know, you guys can entertain any questions you want, but one thing I will say is it is fun working with Dan simply because he does let the who do the how. You know, like, I get to decide literally what the book is, how it's gonna be. He gives me feedback, Babs gives me feedback. But ultimately the book is the book that I created and I really enjoy who, not how, collaboration, and it is just a beautiful experience. I will say one of the immediate thoughts that we get regularly of, okay, if I'm going to start measuring myself backwards and being in the game and actually enjoying my life and actually enjoying my progress, isn't that going to blunt my ambition? Because being in the gap is the reason I'm so successful in the first place. I'm always trying to get to the next place and it is a false idea. Me being in the gain for myself and actually appreciating my progress hasn't stopped, slowed my ambition. It's actually blunted my worry about what anyone else thinks about my progress. I get to take ownership over my own measurements. And that's exactly what Dan said. You have to take ownership of your measurements. None of your opinions of my progress matters to me. Literally, the only person whose opinion of my progress matters to me should be myself. And if I'm in the gap, I'm continuously devaluing my own experiences, devaluing my own progress, beating up my former self because I could have been better or should have been better. And so what it blunts is the noise outside of you and it allows you then to become a more unique individual because now that I'm measuring myself backwards rather than against social media ideals or against where I wish I could be. Now I can actually see my own progress. Enjoy it, think about it, and then start to decide the progress that matters to me, the progress that I want, not the progress that I think I should need or that anyone else thinks that I should have. So it really then allows you to play your own game, enjoy your own game, become the more unique individual that you actually are. And it doesn't stop you from having deeper connections with other people. It just simply allows you to determine for yourself what your own life means for yourself. Anything else you want to say before we open it up?
No, I think. I mean, I think. And this, you know, I would say this is that that this relates to everything that goes on in society. And think about political ideals, that people born in the freest country that's ever existed thinks that the country's a disaster because it doesn't meet their ideals.
We have a very gap culture about America right now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's very funny. The Founding Fathers, with one exception at the end of their lives, thought that what they had created failed. Washington felt that way. Jefferson felt that way. The only one who didn't is Madison, who actually created the blueprint and at the end of his life. And they all lived a long time, by the way. The average lifespan of the seven or eight people who are considered the founding fathers is roughly 81. At the time when people died, lifespan was 35 or 40. Hamilton died real early because he chose the run. Hobbies, you know, dueling, you know, it's not it. Washington died the earliest. He died a year after he was president at 67. But all the others, Jefferson, Madison, Adams, Franklin is one of the things. Average age around 83, 84. You know, it was something really big. But Madison said. He said no. He says they're just unhappy because the people that they see coming to the United States don't look like them and they're snooty about the people who are coming to the United States. He says, we got a great system here. It stops. It makes government almost impossible, which allows other people just to get on with useful things in their life. And he says, no, no, this is a good system. It'll do great. And so the whole point is that the smartest people in the world can be the people most companies caught up in the gap, the most highly educated people in the world. The tendency is that they'll be the big gappers, okay? Because they start judging people around them and start judging what's going on around them by impossibly high ideals. And I just see it. I just see it everywhere. I mean, this is pretty. I mean, it's really interesting. It just deprives you of the, you know, the great freedoms that are really available, greatest freedoms that humans have ever experienced. We're at the healthiest that humans have ever been. You know, poverty levels are dropping, you know, really, really rapidly around the world and everything like that. And it's a terrible world and everything like that. But it has nothing to do with actual measurements. It just has to do with measuring what they see against their ideal of what things should be.
Okay.
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