Barry Garapedian outlines 16 attributes high performers need, starting with adaptability as today's superpower. He teaches practical tactics like handwritten notes, practicing going first, and a fail-forward mindset to build confidence and resilience in young people.
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Most of us spent 12, 16, maybe even 20 years in school learning equations, essays, and exam strategies. But let's be honest. Were you ever taught how to write a thank you note, craft a compelling 30 second pitch, buy your first home, choose the right insurance, invest in crypto? Probably not. And chances are the young people you care about, your kids, grandkids, nieces and nephews, won't learn those things either. But imagine if they could and if they learned early on what high performers actually know about mindset, about confidence, about turning potential into power. That's what Gary. That's what Barry Garpedian is here to share. He's going to open the door to a future most young people have never shown. Barry spent 39 years as one of Morgan Stanley's top 10 financial advisors, working with families across generations and building a legacy of trust, excellence, and results. He's watched his own children follow that path and flourish. Now, as one of the founders of Mag7, Barry has mentored over 1,000 students, including one on one coaching with young leaders from some of the world's most accomplished families. He teaches through magic, storytelling and movement. His passion is helping young people become the best versions of themselves. The title of his talk is what they don't teach you in school. 16 attributes of high Performing young minds. Please help me welcome Barry Garopinian.
Thank you, sir. Thank you, Joe.
Darn it, I did.
So how do you become even more extraordinary than you already are? Take a look at this image. I'm going to count backwards. 3, 2, 1. Everybody yells out, what is this? 76% of people say duck, 25% say rabbit. Here's the extraordinary part. If you can see both of them at the same time, how rapid you can go between them measures adaptability. Years ago, the superpower was what iq, how smart you were. Then it transitioned into what? EQ Emotional Intelligence. The new superpower today is what aq Adaptability. And that's what we're going to talk about today. How do we adapt into the new world of AI? That is what our kids are not learning. A lot of them are getting it. And I'm going to demonstrate to you what extraordinary actually really is. And I need a volunteer. I'm going to throw this football out here. Catch it, pass it around. 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Whoever has the ball is my volunteer. Thank you, Darrell. Stand up, Darrel. You just stand up right there, buddy. Give me any number between 1 and 100. Make it hard. 67. Watch carefully. Joel, could you give me 30 seconds on the clock? See I'm going to fill these random boxes up with some random numbers. You say go. I'm going to fill these boxes up with some numbers. You say go when you're ready. Go. How long did that take me? 22 seconds. 22 seconds. Let me tell you what we did. Random numbers. They're not random. These are not random numbers. They're very intentional numbers. These numbers are going to define attributes of the young minds. There's 16 of them. And I'm going to show you. If you look at the first one and these are the 16 attributes here they are the first one. If you look at this horizontally, the numbers equal 67. That's courage. This is confidence. They all equal 67. The third attribute, and we're going to get into these, a few of them is confidence. This one, self esteem. How do you get self esteem? You have to have accomplishments, win streak, strategic coach. You add the numbers up vertically. This way they equal 60. That's goal setting. This way, the art of connection. Speaking and listening skills. The ability to persuade. They all equal 67. How about diagonally? Grit and determination. They equal 67. This way, guys. Add them up. Add the numbers up this way they equal 67. Fail forward. These four equals 67. High performance, leadership and development. These four, networking. These four all equal 67. Social EQ. Your emotional intelligence. These four equals 67. Becoming more self disciplined. The middle four, Dress for success. You've got seven seconds to make a positive person. Freshen. How about the corners? Equal 67. So here's the thing. How do you do this? I can teach you how to do this. It's very intentional. 22 seconds. How do you learn the 16? Do you really have a structure on how to learn the 16? I'm going to take a few of them. We're going to do a little deeper dive. We can take a look at the art of connection.
Hey, I hope you're enjoying this video and I want to let you know that I have a new book that's come out and if you'd like to get it absolutely free, there's a link below in the description. Or you can wait till the end of this video or you can Simply go to joe'sfreebook.com and you can get a copy there.
So let's talk about the art of connection. One technique that I've used is called Profiles in Success. Great strategy. Here's what it is. The young mind is going to be an author of a book called Profiles in Success. They're going to interview 20 CEOs of the industry they're interested in. They're going to get their phone, they're going to order it, they're going to send me the contents. I'll write a 1500 word profile. It goes into a book. They're going to re gift that book to other young minds as a philanthropic exercise. Do you think the young mind is going to meet someone, maybe an internship, a job or an interest in what they might want to do? This works. It's a very, very cool tool. Very few people do it called profiles and success. And the young mind now has, wow. I'm an author at 18, 19, 20 years old, not difficult to do. Another tool that is absolutely, I think, easy to do. Yes. Handwritten notes. I get two or three sent to me every week. Chris Wang team sent me, I don't know, eight or nine of them. We did a meeting. Every one of them has wax stamps on the back. So the thing about a handwritten note is it takes time to do these. It's a lost art. So we teach wax seal vintage stamps on the front return stamp. Then in the note, it's all about the other person who does this, raise their hand. Who does handwritten notes. Well, almost everybody here get into this habit. Young minds can do this. Young minds are not doing this. So handwritten notes is another easy one to do. And I think it's actually a lost art. Going into another tactic and many of you have heard fail forward. What does that mean? It means either you're winning or you're learning. So a tactic that I love using that's just not all that easy is a concept called practice going first. It's very simple. And the mindset is be the first to initiate, be the first to shake hands with someone, be the first to smile at someone. Be the first person in an elevator to ask everybody in the elevator when, what floor please? And you're pressing the buttons. Demonstrate leadership. And what this does, it's a micro linear move of building confidence. So practice going first is one way we get around. Fail forward. And then of course, enhancing the mindset that it isn't failure. If you're not in the batter's box swinging, you've got to be in the box. So many, many folks never even want to get in the box. Whether you're playing tennis, playing basketball, golf, you have to take the shot. You many folks will never want to get in the shot. So the idea is that you're not losing, you're either winning or learning. So that's a mindset. We teach Early. Another tactic is the eq, which is not easy. And I'm going to talk about something from Strategic Coach I learned almost 25 years ago. And many of you know this is called the hero list. If you don't have a hero list, you might want to consider building a hero list. What do you do with the hero list? What I do is I create lightning strikes. What is a lightning strike? A lightning strike is exceeding an expectation on purpose, meaning doing something for someone else that they're not expecting it. I would create two or three lightning strikes a week, 12amonth. A lightning strike doesn't need to cost money. If you came to my house, we live in Southern California, were big into washing cars, my son or daughter would take your keys and wash your car. Dead serious. Armor all. The tires, vacuum the inside. That's a lightning strike. Little things. And remember, kids don't have money. So it's emotional value, it's spiritual value. You can do those kinds of things. But that's a lightning strike. It's not hard to do. It's a mindset. The other thing that I think is also important is how do you blend in IQ with eq? There's a lot of smart people in this room. How do you blend in the EQ to read the room, to get a temperature of what's really going on? So the big thing that I see here is having the mindset of a young mind to be relentlessly useful. Let's repeat that. Relentlessly useful. It's a mindset. So we start with that and then from there it's how do you consistently be exceptional and, and have the mindset of being present in the moment and not being on your phones the whole time? And then on top of that, how do you actually make a difference in someone's life? So key thing here is to be extraordinary with the young minds. It has to be, I think, taught with your actions. It's not me talking, it's actually doing so from that standpoint, if anyone would like to learn how to do this, let me know. I can show you how to do this. You can do it on an airplane, you can do it on a whiteboard in a math class. I've showed many young kids who've done this. It's actually quite empowering. Thank you very much. Okay.
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