24 Nov 2025 · 3 min
John Jonas explains why Filipino funeral customs terrify OFS workers. Multi-day ceremonies mean extended absences, and many fear their employers will fire them for missing work. Dylan's email sparked this look at what happens when cultural obligations clash with remote jobs.
Hello and welcome to the Secret Sauce of Outsourcing Podcast, the podcast that's dedicated to making you better at outsourcing your work. My name is John Jonas and this is episode 34, let's talk about death for an OFS. So I've talked about what happens in the Philippines when someone dies a number of times. I got an email from Dylan this week about something else that I've said in the past and I kind of want to go over this again. And then I'll tell you what Dylan said because this is, this is really telling about their culture. So in the Philippines, when someone dies in the family, it's a major, major ordeal. Like everybody is expected to be there for the funeral. The funeral is really complicated. It's days long. Everybody contributes. They expect someone to be awake all hours for days on end. So they take shifts. The family of the deceased is expected to feed a whole bunch of people. It's really, really a big deal. And very often it will take a week away from work. And often like the deceased family member lives on a different island. And so they have to get to the ferry port and then they have to take a boat and it's a 14 hour boat ride and then they have to be there for a week and they got to get a 14 hour boat ride back. And it just takes a long time. And in the Philippines, they don't know how you're going to react to this, to them saying, I'm sorry my aunt died and I have to go and I'm going to be gone for nine days. And so very often what happens is they think you're going to fire them because they have to have this time off. And the alternative for them is so terrible of being shamed in their families that it's worth just losing their job. This is where Dylan's email comes in. So just so you understand a little bit about this, here's what he says today. My graphic designer and he gives the name her aunt died. Here's what I told her, Dan, I'm so sorry. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers. I'm here for you and you can share as much or as little as you want. Take a paid week off. We'll be here for you when you're ready. I'm going to send $100 to you. I hope it helps with the costs. So then he continues. That was, that was his email to her, her email back. One of her first replies was, please don't fire me. And he says, I was surprised Because I have no intention of firing her. But you did warn me that it happened. So I had, I had sent. I talked about this in the past, that they're very scared about getting fired. And so often they'll just quit. Like, they'll just say, or they'll just disappear. They're just done and they'll never respond again. And I've had this happen to me before. And even to the point where I was like, no, no, I don't want you to leave. This was a new person. And like, their aunt died or something. And they said they didn't even. They didn't even want to reply. They told their sister to reply to me and said, sorry, she can't work for you. I was like, why? Our aunt died and we have to go to the funeral. I was like, well, that's fine, I'll wait. She was like, no, sorry, she can't work for you. That's. That's the attitude. So he continues. Dylan continues with this. Dan then told me that her sister was fired last week because she couldn't work as much. She was running errands, driving people around, and doing other tasks. When lots of relatives come into town, when someone is close to dying, I couldn't believe they'd fire her. I told Dan to take her time and her job is safe. I know she will stick with me for a long time, and it's just the human thing to do. So this is telling about what happens when a family member dies. They have to have time off, and a death in the family is hard enough. Firing your ofs because they're helping their family grieve is pretty terrible. So I showed this email to one of my ofs, Julia, and she just explained to me how long and complicated a Filipino funeral actually is. And so I'll talk about that in my next episode.
