55: Stand Up for Your Values - Vince Del Monte

You can't have your foot on the gas at all times. Right. I think one issue with higher performers is they try and have the foot on the gas, on their health. It's like the, the it all gets, it all kind of starts to separate in those final 2K. That's when the race like, all right, now you have to dig in. Now it's like who wants to hurt the most? Like Navy seals. You telling me like these guys, world's best fighting machines are 80% is full capacity. Like what do they know that I don't know? And that was like, that really struck me.

Welcome to the coaches council podcast with Justin and Pradeep where the art and science of athletics and business come together to create real life quality application that creates life changing results through actionable takeaways. As we always say, nothing changes if nothing changes. So let's get started. Welcome back to another week of the coaches Council. Really excited about this one, guys. We have the king of the online business space and I know that we've been moving around a lot lately trying to figure out how we can level ourselves up, how we can change the situations we're currently finding ourselves in or really just being able to take applicable change to us in general. So can't wait to get this started with you guys. But as always, it's Justin and Pradeep up in Toronto and we've got fellow Canadian here who's probably only about a stone's throw away from where Pradeep is right now. But as I mentioned, owner of the Seven Figure Mastermind and has built multiple six and seven figure companies within the fitness space, all online, Mr. Vince Del Monte. So thank you so much for spending time with us today, Vince.

Oh, thanks, Justin. Pleasure to be here, man. I know you guys are doing some great things. Pradeep, how close do we live? I'm in Etobicoke.

Oh yeah, right on. I'm actually just out in Stoney Creek, which is part of Hamilton.

Oh, no kidding.

Oh yeah.

I lived in ancaster for almost 10 years, so. All right. On.

Yeah, we're 40 minutes away.

We come your way quite a bit for the wineries.

Oh yeah, I bet it's super nice. Actually that's why I chose to live out here is because the wineries.

No kidding. All right, well next time we. Next time when things finally open, if there is a next time.

We'Ll have to get together or we'll just go into the vineyard and start drinking there.

Oh, there you go.

Background is, he was a. He actually grew up on an orchard. So he's, he's well at home in that space.

Yeah, exactly.

I love it. Ontario wine's amazing. We've, we drink wine quite a few places and man, it's good stuff. Where horror. We got a whole cellar upstairs full and yes, sweet.

Well then you're definitely gonna have to tie it. Try BC wine. That's where emerging from is BC.

Oh, we actually just did Okanagan Valley for our 10 year anniversary and we went to Mission Hill. We went to. Oh, I got, I joined like six different wine clubs. I kid you not. Covert Farms. Oh yeah, Burling Owl. Yeah, we stayed at Burling Owl. We stayed at the Berlin Owl and I have to go check. There's a, there's a couple really good ones. Yeah, there was, there was some nice, nice stuff we brought home. Kismet. That's another good one.

Yeah. So Kona is my hometown.

Okay. Oh, nice. So the first one we went to. Anyways, we talked about that another day.

Well, I guess it might be a relevant topic here because I think, you know, exercise, fitness, business, wine, they kind of go together.

It's true. I mean, and then, you know, it's tougher. I'm trying to. I'm personally trying to. I got three kids, seven, five and three. So we all know the studies. You know, we know that, you know, alcohol is not going to optimize REM sleep. We know it's a sedative, but you know you're robbing the high quality sleep from yourself. We know that, you know it's going to delay anywhere from 24 hours. Now there's research showing that up to a week in some cases fat burning can be delayed with excess. Although alcohol, so not definitely like promoting it to get your best physique. But I'd love to be able to think like I've in my time, like I had one guy is telling, you know, my. How much I enjoy red wine. And when I travel and go on trips with the family, we go to the cottage. You know, I'm like, we bring wine. And he's like, well, well then you know what you need to do. And I said, what? He goes, you need to get your own cottage. And then because I bring family members in that they're like, well, then you have them stay in one cottage and I'll stay in another cottage.

And.

And my extreme mindset was like, that's a good idea. I told my wife, she goes, what are you thinking if you can't live your life with it? Like learning how to Incorporate it, then you don't have control of it. It has control of you if you have to go to those extremes. So, yeah, I'm kind of figuring out how to, you know, manage it and not have it manage me. But, you know, when you got three young kids, at the end of the day, it definitely is, you know, a stress reliever, but it definitely isn't optimal for body composition, that's for sure.

Yeah, I agree with you.

I'm so curious about what you kind of dove into there because so many of us, especially in this high performing space, to be high performing. And I hate the word high performing as it begins with, because it's become so commercialized, so commoditized. But for our context, high performers are very addictive people. They've become high performing simply because they've fixated on something or they've become obsessed on a goal, and they've thus set their life up to achieve that goal. What have you noticed, Vince, in being able to work with thousands of people who have now become extremely successful in the online space and yourself being so successful in building these multiple six, seven figure companies? Throughout your timeline, what have you noticed about this addictive behavior and being able to, as you said, not allow it to control you, but you control it to now work for you rather than against you?

That's a great question. Yeah, I think, I mean, one thing I'd say right out of the gate is you can't have your foot on the gas at all time. Right. I think one issue with higher performers is they try and have the foot on the gas on their health. You know, they want to, you know, be lean all the time and they want, want to have the foot on the gas in the business, and they want to have their foot in the gas with the marriage, they want to have their foot in the gas with the kids. It's like, then they want, it's, you can't have your foot on the gas at all times with all of these things. So I think what I've learned is that, you know, I think it's an Oprah quote. You can have everything you want in life, but just not all at the same time. And I think, you know what my dad really taught me early on that, you know, life comes in seasons and you got to know what season you're in. And, you know, there's different type of weather at different times of the year. You got to know how to dress for that weather. So if you're just freshly married. Yeah. You might want to invest a little Extra time to stabilize some, you know, date nights and get some good habits in place and shut down times or else that marriage isn't going to last very long. When you've got new kids, yeah, you're gonna have. Something has to bend. I guess that's the main thing. And a lot of, I think high performers maybe see it as a sign of weakness. Well, no, it's just a sign of like weary. You're, you're not weak because you're weary. And I think there's a really fine line to understand that strong people know they need rest. I mean, I had to go through therapy this past summer. I had to get a legit therapist to work through some of this stuff myself because I am a high performer and I put a high currency on. I don't need anybody. I just need to hit the gas. I don't need people. But what happens when you build that identity is that you prevent yourself from getting emotionally connected to people, which is what you need to ultimately get to the next level in business. So you can build a business to seven figures, as you know, not solopreneur, but with a small team. But then to go to the next level, you need to have people emotionally connected to your vision. And if you're not somebody who's seen a currency or seen value on relationships and investing into others and helping others become the talent, instead of you becoming the talent, you'll become the bottleneck. And this what I lived through. So you really have to know what's most important right now. You know, that's a nice little acronym for your audience. Like what's the definition of win? What's important now? What's important now? 4:30. My family is what's important now. Right. So if you look at your life, not even just in terms of seasons, you can break it up during the day. What's important between 4:30 and 8:30? My family. I got to go upstairs. I'm at a 1 out of 10 for energy. My kids are at a 10 out of 10. So I've got structure my day in a way where I take maybe a 15 minute nap before I go upstairs or I have to push my caffeine two hours later into the day. So I still have some energy coming upstairs when they all want to wrestle and go outside and I just want to lie on the couch and sleep and I have to cook still. And then, you know, hopefully there's time left to even have a conversation with my wife at the end of the day. So you have to know, like what's important right now and then just be willing to bend in other areas. And I think having a vision for the future, like I want to run through the finish line at the end of my life with a team and I want to hope my wife's beside me, I hope my kids are beside me. And I don't think people have like a long term vision of like what they want their life, their desired end state to look like at the end of their life. And people, you can move pretty freaking quick if you're, you know, if you're willing to sacrifice a lot of stuff. So the question is, I find people that get ahead in life faster aren't the ones that are willing to work harder, but the ones that are willing to sacrifice more. And the question is, is what are you willing and not willing to sacrifice now? I think you can ultimately have it all. I am a big believer if I believe you can have the big business, a great family. You know, I look at like pastors like Steven Furtick and Craig Groeschel who have, you know, 300,000 people tune into their service every single Sunday. You know, they have, you know, over 200 volunteers for their church and they're both published five plus New York Times best selling books. Like these are individuals operating at the highest of their, in their careers. They did it in stages and they're in great shape. They both look, they're in fantastic shape. I'm like, how do they. And they have great marriages, at least from what it looks like on the outside. Like how they have three, five kids each. So I'm like, how did they do that? And you do it in stages. So I think that's how I manage. Like I think it's okay to be pre performer, but not to the point where you think you're a peak performer, but really you don't have full capacity and capabilities. So you're actually doing everything kind of mediocre. So being able to acknowledge like capacity and capability is huge. I worked with the therapist I worked with, her husband is a Navy seal and something that he taught me when I got a call with him, he said that something they teach in Navy SEALs is that 80% is full capacity, like Navy SEALs. Are you telling me like these guys, world's best fighting machines are 80% is full capacity. Like what do they know that I don't know? And that was like, that really struck me. So I think to maintain, to be a peak performer, we need a really non sexy concept that my dad taught me called margin. There needs to Be like margin in your life where you have time to actually take a phone call from a friend or you actually have time to, you know, work on a project, you know, that's completely unrelated to crushing your goals. It's like, yeah, I got time. Yeah, I can come over this afternoon. What are you up to? So that's something I'm striving for. I'm trying to be an example of somebody who's achieved quite a bit, you know, decent amount of stuff, but at the same time, he hasn't sacrificed the most important things to get there.

That's such a great point, because I love that quote, weakness versus weary. Because I'm on the phone with so many people all the time that come back and are literally weeping on the other end of the phone because they've added so much stress to their plate, they've sacrificed so much to get to where they are, that the capacity to hold onto it has broke them. One, internally. But two, they've also left a lot of things on the table that they wish they would still have with them. And in doing so, they look at that and they see it as weakness. They see it as not being a man. They see it as not being able to, as Bedros would say, man up. Not being able to do these things. They see it as they've fallen short. Where in actuality, what really was the error was loading up the bar too heavy before you had gone and been able to do 5, 6, 8, 10 reps at that rate before actually crushing that big one.

RM spot on.

Well, Vince, I think you made some really good points here when you talked about margin. Because I think that's important. Having some buffer, whether that's time or capacity or from a financial perspective, I think that's important because I see a lot of guys book their meetings back to back. For example, they're just running from one meeting to the next meeting to the next meeting. And typically what ends up happening is the meetings go over or someone shows up late and it doesn't start on time. And so people don't get to finish their thought and they're on to the next one or they don't get to finish their project. So I think you're right. You're onto something there. I really like the point that you made about the navy seals and 80% capacity, because something always comes up. If you're an entrepreneur, you're a business owner, even as a professional, something always comes up and you have to have that capacity to take it on. Because if you don't you're just going to use energy that you don't have to deal with that. And then everything that you want to work on as an individual just kind of goes to the wayside. So I think that's absolutely brilliant and thanks for pointing that out.

Yeah. Rest isn't, Rest isn't a sexy topic in bodybuilding and business. But I mean, having done this for, you know, 10, 15 years, like, I'm starting to see my. Some of my close friends going through the different stages. And some of those stages involve like one buddy just got a hip replacement. I'm like, how the heck do you get a hip replacement? You know, you're. I'm not judging, but like these. He would even say, yeah, I was an idiot. Like, you would say, I did some stupid stuff. And then another close friend, you know, he's got a, you know, signing off to sign off on a divorce that's gonna, you know, cost them, you know, his, his. How did he say his spouse is gonna become the second richest person he knows? And he's like the richest person he knows. His wife's now going to become the second richest person he knows compared to all of his friends who are, you know, in the weeds of their business every single day. So there's, there's like, small decision, there's certain small decision. There's small mistakes in life and there's big mistakes in life. I, like, try just not to make the big ones. It's like sometimes to be successful, it's not even like, you don't have to be successful. Just avoid the big mistakes. And obviously I believe in grace and that there's. You can recover from everything and everything, you know, happens for a reason. But like, I mean, at least do your best to avoid some big mistakes. And it all comes back to the marathon mindset. Maybe this is why I was a long distance runner in high school. In university, I represented my country and for triathlon back in the day. So, like, you learn that the race doesn't start. Our coach used to always say, the race doesn't start until 5k. It's like anybody can run the first 5k with the leaders. It's like the, the. It all gets fin. It all kind of starts to separate in those final 2K. That's when the race like, all right, now you have to dig in. Now it's like, who wants to hurt the most? But I think, I think there's value in thinking way out into the future. And I mean, even right now with like Covid going on right now and, you know, all the craziness in the world and the different, like, where are we going? You know? You know, it's looking pretty scary, and I'm trying to figure out, like, which fights do I fight and which ones do I just, like, you know, kind of sit tight and let play out? Like, do I exhaust? Like, I could put a lot of emotional energy. I probably already put too much emotional energy into my, you know, Covid posts. And, you know, we're going and all that, and I'm wondering, like, is that smart or should I be fighting this battle? I think we're always trying to figure out, like, where do I put my energy? You know, do I fight for my freedoms right now, or do I just, like, I put my energy, you know, do I fight for my freedoms right now, or do I just, like, focus on my people, focus on my family? So there's this constant struggle to, you know, for a man to ask, where do I want to direct my power as a man? I think that's a question every man asks, like, what kind of man do I want to be? Where do I want to direct my power? You know, which kingdom have I been given to look after? You know, I don't personally believe in fighting wars unless, you know, you're gonna win. I believe in fighting battles, though, that, you know, you can win. So I feel like, yeah, there's a lot of distractions along the way, too. So it's.

It's.

You're trying to figure out, all right, where do I. Where do I plant my, you know, plant my feet? Where do I, you know, wage battle, if you will, and where there's gonna be an actual payoff, you know, spending time with my family. That's where there's going to be real payoff. Helping my kids, you know, grow up and become adults. That's where there's going to be a payoff. Influencing my coaching students to take, you know, you know, get their businesses in order, get their finances in order. That's where I can be effective. So I think that's where I try and, like, come out, and that's where I'm trying to make a difference in areas that I can actually influence. I don't know if I have as much influence as I thought I did. Maybe I do in my circle, but, like, out there, I'm like, yeah, I gotta. That one's like, I don't really have the tools or resources to go win that war, so I'm gonna concentrate my energy into, you know, where I can be effective. So I think that's, you know, good guiding principles on how to manage your limited, you know, capacity and capabilities.

Right now actually quite interesting because you're in tobacco and we're out here just, you know, 40 minutes away. So our, we were just, we just came out of the lockdown. Things are being unlocked here very soon and Toronto's very high density place and you guys have having bigger challenges. I'm interested to know what are your thoughts? Is it regarding Covid and the lockdown and how they shut down businesses when you were talking about the energy aspect.

Yeah, you want me just to speak freely here?

Why not? I think a lot of people have this on their minds. I think there's a, there's a number of different caps, not necessarily in terms of whether it's conspiracy theories, but from a business aspect. Just love to get your thoughts.

Well, yeah, actually the one of the premiers of the Conservative Party or one of the guys in the Conservative Party, he lives right by you out in, he's in, he's in Stony Creek area. He's actually really good friends with my father. He could never say, you know, what I'm about to share publicly, but I'll share. Like a lot of these guys are very, very frustrated right now. I mean, my wife's a nurse, just to give some context. So if there's anybody who was going to be afraid of a virus, it would be her. She got three kids, you know, she's not going to put them in harm's way whatsoever. So we look at the stats and we look at the data. So we don't see we have zero fear around Covid itself. I personally have zero fear. I'm confident that I'll get it. I'm confident my kids will get it. I'm confident my whole family will get it. We'll all get it. It's a virus, it's inevitable. So, you know, I believe in operating your life from a place of faith and not a fear. So when I'm contracting and telling my kids they have to put on a mask when I'm telling my kids that hey, we can't do this, we can't do that, what am I teaching them? You know, the Bible teaches that every single person is going to go through multiple pandemics in their life. This isn't the first one. We'll come up against another one and another one. My kids are 2, 5 and 17. So I think this through the lens of how will my kids respond when they're 12, 15 and 17, when the next Major thing comes along, are they going to remember Daddy, you know, getting scared and, you know, putting life on hold and letting the government control the family's reality, or did we pursue forward? So, you know, we look at the stats and we look at who's actually vulnerable and who's not, and we look at where transmission's happening and we, you know, we live our life. You know, we, you know, say too much, but, you know, we could go to church, but we have to do it in private, right? I have muscle camps and we let people into my house. I'm, I'm living my life. And I feel it's very frustrating right now because a lot of people bought into this narrative that these lockdowns work and these lockdowns now, even Roman Baber, the guy has shown that there's more data that is causing more harm, more death, more carnage from the lockdowns itself. But unfortunately, you know, these politicians are, they've made decisions to protect their reputation and get reelected than what's good for the publics. And I think they didn't expect that the public would be so convinced that these things actually work and are actually in favor of what we're doing. So, long story short, small businesses have to open. And this could literally be open with a, you know, split second. If all small businesses just opened up, it would be over. Just like that. It would be over. So, you know, I've, I've told a lot of people, you guys just have to open and you can't even be afraid of the fines. The fines are being filed in traffic court. I have a friend who's been fined. He's gone to the. Unless you plead guilty, you're not paying anything. The government's not even processing them. If you go to court, they're going to delay it 30 days and then delay it 30 days and then delay It 30 days. Because in a court of law, they have to justifiably demonstrate that what you're doing, opening your business, is actually increasing the spread of transmission. They actually have to provide scientific data. They can't use Doug Ford answers. Where are our medical advisors of told us so? That doesn't fly in a court of law. So. So. But people are afraid. People are afraid. It's like, well, what if I get fine? Well, one, you're not going to pay the fine. You're going to toss it away and you're going to get a paralegal to help you fight it, and you're going to be fine. But people are so scared. I think that's what. What's really shown up for me. I mean, I just went through this with the principal of my daughter's school. I had to get her total mask exemption. She's in grade two. And I had to go back and forth with the. With my daughter's principal, and he was really good. You know, first of all, they can't ask you what the medical condition is, all right? They can't ask you any details on that. That violates your human rights, all right? And I had to get a total mask exemption. And I had to ask myself, do I want my daughter wearing a mask? First of all, they want her in the cloth. And then he said, well, we can have her wear the shield mask. We all know what's the difference? The shield mas. It's just pure optics. And then they said, okay, can she wear the shield mask? And we'll have her wore it just from one classroom to the next. She's in small, private Christian school. There's only 15 kids in the class. The classrooms are like, literally 10ft apart. So you want her to put on a mask from walking from one classroom to the next? It's a completely illogical. So what I've come to the conclusion of is that, you know, in Canada, we are dealing with very, very weak, lame, and ignorant people that are just afraid to grow a backbone and stand up for the rights. So I see it. And then they use intimidation and they imply something that they're gonna do that they can't even do in the first place. So people don't know the law. I think that's the first person. I know the law. I know my rights. And you have to fight for them right now because they will use intimidation and they will use scare tactics to, you know. Then they say, well, then your daughter's gonna probably be. Though. My wife said this, well, then what if she starts getting made fun of by other kids because she's not wearing it? Or what if other kids parents tell their kids to not play with our daughter at school? I had to bring that up in the email, too. And I said, here's another one of my concerns. I'm concerned that there might be people part of the school that tell their kids to not play with my kids. I'm in a fight. This is a freaking fight. But most people, and I have a couple of my. My daughters, I'm friends with a couple of my daughter's fathers in the. In the class, and I told them, hey, you want to go at this together and team up? And like, we're okay just having her wear the shield. I'm like, hey, what you do with your children is completely fine. You know, that's. But I'm like, I can see it. I can. I can see, like, they're just afraid, like. So you're not going to push a little bit. You're just gonna bend over. So that's what I see. And if we keep doing this, where are we gonna be? I mean, people, no one's standing up and fighting, so I'm just. For me, it's no more excuses, right? I'm standing up for my family. I'm standing up for my child. And we're gonna have to take this one battle at a time. If he says, hey, then we can't do that. Well, then again, I'm gonna. I'll be prepared to tell them, well, here's what I'm gonna have to do next. Then I'm gonna file a human rights complaint. If I file human rights complaint, if that goes to court, then this is going to end your career. Are you sure you want to sacrifice your career for this? So you have to be prepared to punch back, because that's what they're doing. And so I don't know if you guys want to keep going on this angle, but this is, like happening right now for me, so I'll pause there. But this is. I mean, we have to fight. I mean, it's not right that people are losing their livelihoods in the name of a virus that's never going to go away. And. Does it kill people? Yes. Is it real? Of course. I'm not denying that it's not real and that it's not something we have to obviously be aware of, but we can't shut down the entire freaking world and, you know, we can't have more death by despair than the. By then what the virus is causing itself. It just. So. It is. It's hard to not, like, get caught up in. As you can see, I just. I just dumped on you guys.

Vince, this is, I think, not to get off topic, but what I love about you and your content and everything else that you're putting out and the way in which you show up is it's. It's true, it's authentic, it's. It's genuine. It's. It's what you're feeling and it's relatable. And it comes back to this, this very topic, is that when you get clear on what you want to fight for, when you get clear on what your mission is, when you get clear on what your value system is based around. You can all of a sudden move forward in things that no longer become decisions. What causes us to have to make decisions is when we're conflicted between our values and what our actions should be, when we're clear on what our values are and what our morals are and what our true mission is, there is no decision to be made. It's simply an action. And so that's. I think, what I appreciate about you the most, is that you know what you're looking for, you know what you want, you know how to get there. Even your story that you started this segment with where you can't. You say, yeah, I struggle with that. The. That obsessive nature of certain things that I had to go and I had to actually get a therapist and work through some of these things. I actually had to go. And I'm in my own battles right now, like you are. You become this very authentic, very genuine person that people can relate to, and all of a sudden go, oh, shit. A guy that's making a difference in the world of thousands of other businessmen, thousands of other business women, thousands of other business owners has his own struggles, has his own fights, has his own uphill battles that he's decided not to just throw a pair of boots on, but throw the spikes on and go up that mountain road that's got ice and rock chips and everything falling towards him, and he's gonna throw his shield on and just start walking and making his way through and acting instead of having to fight a decision. But carry your morals and values on your back and keep going, and whoever wants to come along can come. I think that's what makes it truly admirable and truly applicable to this whole statement. Covid or not, or business or relationship or whatever, it all has that same connotation and exact same value proposition to it.

Yeah. Yeah. You got to know what you stand for. You fall for everything, right? You got. You got to believe. You got to believe in something. You got to believe in something, you know, and you got to ask yourself is, you know, what I'm believing in? Is it worth fighting for? And I think there are fights worth fighting. Like, what's the point of all this? What am I doing? You know, I'm building this business, but I can't even stand up to my. You know, the principal is probably gonna retire in two, three years. Like, what's. I'm gonna just. Yeah, it. I think. I think one thing I love about social media, I love about being online, and I'M sorry, I don't like about social media. Like you kind of just lose sense of like, do I still have what it takes to survive? If you ask a man like, what is it?

Take. Dive deeper into that, Vince. Go, go deeper into what you're. What you mean by that?

Well, let's ask every man, like just talk to everybody, hey man, what does it take to survive? I think most guys would say, you know, a phone on a wallet. But now that's a pretty smart answer to be honest. But if you think about it, this is the day and age we live in, so any problem can be solved now with just a phone and a wallet. What kind of man are you if you can solve every problem with just a phone and a wallet? So you start to wonder, do I have any real skills? Like I got high income skills. This one, I make it. This is, this is a guy who's built a business on teaching high income skills. I'm not, I'm starting to question, like I'm 41 now. I'm like, you know, I'm starting to like ask myself, I've made some good decisions, you know, financially and all that, but I'm like, do I have what it takes to survive? I don't know how to fire a gun. I don't know how to fight. I know how to run. So I guess that's not bad. I got the best self defense, but, you know, I can't pick up my whole family, put them on my back and run. So I don't know how to shoot a gun. I don't know how to fight. I don't know how to hunt for my own food. I don't know how to plant a garden. My wife probably knows how to do that. But you see what I'm saying, like, I'm starting to wonder, do I actually know how to survive if I had to now, Vince, what kind of situation could that. I don't know, I'm just saying what kind of exist, like, which path have I've gone? I think every guy starts to evaluate, like, are the decisions I'm making, you know, what skills am I really gonna pass along to my son Gianluca? You know, I think, you know, we do live in a, you know, modern age and all that, but I think the online world can maybe we can get so, you know, you know, robotic and so like caught up in the techno technology that we kind of just lose our, our wildness.

I love this, Vince, because I did a piece the other day and I talked heavily on this Was, have we lost our grit? Have we lost our ability? Have we just gotten comfortable because we worked so hard to get somewhere? We put our mind so heavily into the online space or building our business, or we grinded for a certain period of time to get it done in a certain way. And we developed a certain lifestyle based upon what we were able to accomplish. And now because we've gotten, quote, unquote, a little bit soft, I mean, and I did this when I was working out. I chose to go to a track and work out outside. It was minus 10. And I just was like, you know what? I'm just gonna do this. And the first five minutes were tough. And then after I was done, I was like, damn, that was awesome. Like, that's really cool. And it spurred this thought in me is like, there's so many people that the moment we talk about doing something hard, it's like, oh, no, that's good, somebody else can do that.

Yeah.

And it's like, have we lost that ability to have grit? Have we lost that ability to dive into the hard things? And we've now made the things that are hard. What filter are we using on social media? Or what does our content calendar look like? Or what's the. What's our gaming dungeon going to start looking like? Like these are the things that are our hard decisions rather than really getting out and getting gritty with it.

Yeah. It's interesting you guys say that because I always say, I think guys of our generation, Vince, you and I are the exact same age. Or I say we're the last line of defense, because the next generation, I don't think, will have an understanding of what it means to have that, Whether it's the work ethic or the grit or just be a man or even from a woman's perspective. I think we're losing a lot of that from that perspective. And I see that in relationship. People talk about gender and gender neutrality and all this other stuff. And I have a tough time with a lot of this because we're just raising a whole new generation of, I'm going to say, vanilla ice cream. It's just. There's no flavor to it. There's no. There's no edge to it. There's no stiffness to it. There's. I think we need to have that because we. I'm just going to share my experience. I grew up on an orchard, and I grew up literally having to dig ditches with. We couldn't afford excavators back then, and we had to dig ditches like we're talking long ass ditches, like mile long ditches for irrigation. And it was just a different story. And I look back when I was then at that time I was like, man, this is like slave labor. Like this is the worst thing ever. Like how, you know, how could my parents make me do this? But I look back now and I'm like, that is the best thing that they could have ever done for me. Like, it's just so amazing. And I think we as my kids are very similar to yours. I have a five year old and a seven year old. Don't have the three year old. You're saying two year old. Yeah, yeah, we were talking about having a third but we don't, we haven't gotten there yet. But I can just see it because my, my biggest fear and I think, I think a lot of us guys have this, that some point we say is this world. And I, I don't believe it's going to. But is this world gonna go to some other place? And how are our kids going to fend for themselves like that? That's a big question with what's happening right now.

Yeah, you're right. And I think that's, that's where I'm coming from. I'm like, they're not gonna remember what I said, they're gonna remember what I did. Right? Kids don't model what you say, they model what you do. You know, I want to, I want to ensure that, you know, we have like some habits, you know, things that we do, you know, you know, get outside. I built an ice rink back here, you know, we got an ice rink. The kids are learning how to skate. This year we go into the trails. We call it Narnia because they're in the CS Lewis and the Ventures of Narnia. And we go find a hill and know we go up before, you know, we get to gets too steep and we, yeah, we're just trying to like live outside. I mean, you know, we're not hunting or anything but like I would love to get into that stuff. I think you need a, you have to have another. Like you got to be around guys. Like you got to have a circle of guys that are willing to like, oh yeah, let's do this stuff or else you're done. You know, if the guys just want to stand around and talk business, like, don't get me wrong, it's fun. I love talking about business and stuff, but at the same time, hey, let's go do a trip. Let's go on an adventure. Let's go. You know, even if it's skiing for a couple of days, like you, the man of the house has to take lead, right? Because your wife's exhausted. Taking care of the kids the bulk of the time, depending on your setup. But, you know, most cases. So you have to initiate, you know, taking the kids outside, getting them fresh air, pushing them, letting them be kids. You know, iPads, max, like, one episode, 20 minutes a day. Like, but, you know, kids are watching 48 hour. 48 hours of. 4 to 8 hours of TV a day. Since this whole situation, it's like, kind of generate, like, what's the future look like? It's like, that's. I like what you said. We're the last line of defense. I think we just get caught up watching shows. I've been watching Vikings, and I'm like, these guys were fighting for land and for conquest. I'm like, my wife goes, is that all they did? Just fight? Like, what else did they have to do? Like, now we have to learn. They were fighting. They were constantly fighting. I'm like, what am I. All we. What am I fighting for?

I love that.

Such Vikings. And I'm like, these guys were fighting for land and for conquest. I'm like, my wife goes, is that all they did? Just fight? Like, what else did they have to do? Like, great question.

Such a great question. I mean, we can ponder on this all day. Vince, we always ask, what can our audience do for you?

Oh, for me, I got a podcast, too, and I love talking about muscle, money, mindset, mission, marriage. So the Vince Del Monte podcast show, they could check that out. And my Instagram is a good place where people can connect with me at Vince Del Monte. I'm also on Facebook. Vince Del Monte. I think that's pretty much it. You know, I actually did something cool. I think you guys might, like. Might like. I. I'm releasing this series of videos on YouTube with my dad. We actually already shot them, and we're dropping one per week. It's called Top 10 Lessons I Learned from My Father. And I've never seen anybody else do it. It's. My dad was a pastor for 19 years, so I grew up as a pastor's son, so it took me a while to figure out what I believed to find my own voice for my own voice, because he was a very strong voice in my ear, like, from a positive standpoint. But there comes a pressure there. So, yeah, I did. He also retired, so it was kind of something I wanted to do. Is timely as well. So he doesn't call it retiring, he calls it refiring. So he's refiring at 67 and he's got his own little results in coaching practice. He actually coaches a lot of guys like us. Like his demographic is guys like us and who are pretty successful financially, business wise. But they, they want to get paid, family in order. They. His, his whole mantra is I help men align their souls, their roles and their goals. So I brought him on my YouTube. He's been on a lot of, a lot of my stuff, but we did a little 10 part YouTube series, so I think your listeners might enjoy that. They just drop once a week on my channel.

Love it.

I love it.

We'll throw that, we'll throw that link in the show, notes and everything for you guys so you can go pop over and watch that. But again, Vince is just full of great information, having been successful in a multitude of spaces and is one of the leading men not only in his business, but also in his household and leading the way through not just words, but also experience. So guys, if you want to win, figure out what's important now. Understand that there are seasons in life that we go through in which we have to battle and put those shoes on and truly go and choose what you believe in, choose what you stand for and not just make a choice, but stick to your goals, values and morals so that there doesn't become a decision to be made. And understand the difference between weariness and weakness. And that weariness is a choice. Weariness is where we bring ourselves. Weakness is something that we do not have inside of us. We were born winners, we were meant to be winners. But it's what do we put ourselves around? Who do we involve ourselves with? What situations do we put ourselves in that truly ultimately determine if we win at the end of the day? So with that, guys, stay humble, stay hungry, and we'll see you next week.