Coaches Council Podcast Episode 38: Choose Your Energy Source

Remove the toxic people immediately because one toxic person can infect the entire organization fast.

Play your game the reason that we keep losing in life in our games is because we're trying to play somebody else's this is the coaches council made up of six elite coaches dedicated to serving and ending personal struggle for high performers in business health and relationships as a collective we have built and helped build six seven and eight figure businesses dominate in multiple industries coached and played in professional sports leagues and developed some of the strongest and most intimate relationships both professional and personal this isn't your average podcast it's for the hungry the dedicated the doers for those that have a dream and truly want that dream to become reality people who want to take action leave their ego at the door and own every level of their life if that's you then step into the coach's counsel as we rewrite the truths to living that high performance life welcome back to another week of the coaches council pradeep it's great to see you as always yeah man looking.

Forward to this episode we got a.

Great topic here one hundred percent so quick story was on a call a couple days ago and i got on this call and it started off really kind of different the guy had a ton of energy coming in and it was one of those linkedin calls he was an influencer in the space if you were seeing me on video it's with the quotations and started to go off in this major form of negativity and bashing and very just blunt brute force and i all of a sudden started to become aware of the energy in which i was showing up with my anxiety rose my sense of frustration rose my sense of my heart rate rose and the clarity in which i was able to show up with i certainly suddenly feel like i was going in a circle and without going into detail as to how the whole conversation went and where it went from there it brought to me this level of awareness of how powerful the people you surround yourself with is to not only your mental health but also the way in which you can go in and attack anything that you're looking to accomplish and it can either be a buoy that holds you up and gets you closer to where you want to be or really act as an anchor and pull you down and make you literally swim upstream for the hardest or the simplest tasks around this guy got on your nerves no he didn't get on my nerves it literally just came to be like man i want positive people around me i want people who are uplifting who are empowering who are who are empathetic who are powerful in their own right but do so while showing up with a if you're gonna win i'm gonna win too and making sure that everybody in the circle everybody involved can get some type of benefit out of it because there's so and my passion starting to come out here because i see it all the time where somebody shows up with a dream i've got a couple clients we just got off the phone with this week has been crazy with clients showing up and i think it has a lot to do with the space in which we're in the quarantine we're getting close to holiday season a lot of some of the states have put out warrants of saying hey we shouldn't be doing thanksgiving festivities or christmas festivities with with families and they're sitting there and these clients are coming and saying i feel like my network is nothing i feel like i'm missing interaction with people i feel like i'm missing interaction with that positivity that's driving me towards creation that's driving me towards accomplishment that's driving me towards taking on new battles new challenges and and i don't know where to turn i don't know where to go and last week's episode with jack he talked right about that about how if you want to go and create a million dollar business surround yourself with million dollar business owners if you want to go and get in great shape and be able to squat four hundred five go hang out with jack and his friends because that's what they're going to do and i guarantee you you are going to be able to level yourself up there as well and it kind of comes full circle back to the story that i started with where if you don't want to be negative if you want to get out of that just lack of a better word that negative downward spiral that can happen surround yourself with the people that you want surround yourself with the people that are positive surround yourself with people that are striving for greatness and at the end of the day it's going to be a win win win win with everybody that you surround yourself with as well but also with those that you touch yeah.

Man i don't know what to say about that because if you look around society right now ninety percent of people are in the down and out in terms of negativity that's just how society is right most people are not positive they're not that self aware they align themselves with other you could say negative people especially with everything that's happening with COVID i think that's just amplified the challenges that a lot of people are having so i completely agree with you i think who you surround yourself with is a critical thing from a coaching aspect whether it's in business or on the personal side it's important because i have clients for example that you can help them transition themselves whether it's their identity their belief system or their stories that they're telling themselves and if they go back into that same environment they just go back to square one again so you know this is important for people out there listening to understand is one of the biggest things that you can do to help yourself out of a tough situation is find the right people because you want people that support you in what you're doing and on the flip side you don't want people pulling you back into those old habits or the old ways of being so actively go and seek out i think if i take a look at what is the biggest factor that changes people's lives it's who you hang out with that ultimately is it and it's it unfortunately you know we talk about things like you can't choose your family but you do get to choose your friends when you get to a certain age you get to you get to choose who you hang out with everything is a choice whether you make that conscious choice or not because it's not always easy to say hey look i want to hang out with this or i shouldn't hang out with this person because they could be a sibling they could be a family member they could be a business partner or an employee or whatever it is even in business man one of the things i tell people is remove the toxic people immediately because one toxic person can infect the entire organization fast and yeah it's so important every time you bring on a new employee for example you want to put them with someone who has a positive outlook on the company that is doing the right things you don't want to put them with someone that is tainted that has a low work ethic that's not engaged because they're going to pick up on those habits right away it's funny because i'm not against unions i used to be in a union i used to run a large organization that had a lot of union people but it's a mentality you have some person come in that's super engaged wanting to work hard and then you have the other union people saying hey slow down there buddy because you're making us look.

Bad you're exactly right i take the example even back to my time in the national hockey league and anytime that a rookie came on anytime a young kid came in brand new draft who are you putting him with you're putting him with the seasoned veteran bobby ryan has literally housed different new players every single year simply because why they want them to develop the habits that he has why did sidney crosby go live with mario lemieux why did auston matthews and mitch marner go live with patrick marleau two of the best players that ever played the game twenty five years in the league stanley cup winners captains of their teams for ten twelve years they want to go and they want them to have the positive effects the positive habits the positive mentality the approach of a pro every single day to rub off on these kids that don't have the experience are still looking to get there are looking to strive to become those next ones and we need to start to apply that more in our lives as well instead of sitting and complaining about where we were at and starting to put those boundaries in place and by understanding where those people live and living there more i think one of the most powerful things with masterminds or groups now you can say that do you get as much out of it from the one on one coaching or whatever it may be but there is something powerful when you are surrounded with a bunch of like minded people that are trying to level up in a very unique way showing up with a open mind showing up with a positive mind that attitude of i'm going to absorb as much as i can because this is a place in which is structured for me to do.

So i think there's something to be said about teams you mentioned a lot about sports and that's important because those analogies if we take a look at it apply to all aspects of your life you are constantly forming teams with other people you are whatever that may be whether that's your neighbor or that's someone else in your community whether that's an employee there's a team if you're in a relationship with your spouse you are a team if you have kids you are a team so taking a look at it from that perspective is important and say okay who on my team is actually adding value to the team and what value are they adding and are they actually holding the team back now you can't sit there and you can't say hey look i'm going to fire my kid because they're not adding value to the team but you want to make sure that at least there's some understanding of what the expectations of the team are and with any team it requires strong leadership so perhaps maybe you are that leader out there maybe you're that leader that's taking charge and saying hey look i'm going to make sure that whatever team i'm a part of i'm going to actually have a leadership role or i'm going to be the leader itself but maybe there's an opportunity for you to be part of another team where someone else is a better leader or a stronger leader and to understand that it's okay to sometimes follow other people as well and what i'm basically saying is everything is a collaboration if you try to be that soul that lone ranger you're not gonna get very far i can tell you that in business you're not gonna get very far you're not gonna get very far in your personal life i see a lot of those challenges in relationships because i see even with couples they try to be you know this whole concept of independent man i don't know how many people that screwed up or how many relationships that screwed up for people because it's not about independence it's about interdependence we are social beings that's why so many people are ending up with anxiety now depression now talking to teachers they're saying that the biggest challenge that they're having right now with kids because of all the events that are happening with COVID isn't the academics it's the mental illnesses that they're challenged with all the stuff that they're bringing from their families now because the families are challenged so all of this stuff is important we are social beings we are driven to hang out with other people man i'm dying to go out there and actually just go to a pub or a bar or something and have some drinks without like worrying whether i'm gonna you know get coughed on by someone or something like that like it's just here in canada it's different because a lot of that stuff is closed right a lot of our bars now are closed i know in some states like in states in the us a lot of that stuff is still happening i don't know man as a canadian well you're you're technically a canadian.

As well i'm a canadian adopted by.

America yeah yeah exactly what's happening but long story short we are social beings and who we have in our tribes who we have in our groups is so important you can't underestimate that and in fact i think there should be a filter i think there should be not necessarily a checklist but something that you keep in mind where you have some criteria to say okay does this person align with my values does this person make me feel good is this person you know someone that can help me grow as an individual and is there some kind of mutual i'm not gonna say benefit from the standpoint of hey you know you're gonna make money off each other but that's why relationships last is because there's some mutual benefit there's some value being exchanged not monetary value but something else some of my best friends man two of my best friends well actually there's three brothers but two of them are hilarious as heck they are like the funniest people i've ever met and i just love hanging out with them just because they make me piss myself literally they'll crack a joke about anything and i'll just start laughing and i just want to hang out with them because of that because they're just uplifting and just laugh all the time those are the kinds of people you want to bring bringing into your circle and all the other people you want to filter out i don't know how you know justin about you but how often do we see people.

Laugh these days man oh my god it is few and far between let's.

Put it that way yeah it's crazy just simple laughter now and i don't know if it's a result of the stuff that's happened with COVID or other stuff like that but man we just need more laughter even the movies that you take a look at all this reality tv crap like what happened to the good old days like the eighties and nineties when you had those movies with john candy and dan aykroyd canadians but you know like the guys you know movies were just about laughter you don't get that very much anymore.

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Yeah man it's a disease you know personally myself what i ended up doing about three weeks ago is i actually stopped posting on facebook like we still have our business stuff that we post and and this podcast will be promoted on facebook but i stopped posting because i was just looking at the feeds and i was like man this is just all garbage now like it was just i i couldn't so much negativity i was like i just can't deal with it and then i honestly just deleted the facebook app from my phone like i have no desire to even go on there and i feel so much better we talk about this and i think we've talked about being addicted to technology and social media but it's about time that i think that we stand up and say something needs to be done about this think about this we have guys like mark zuckerberg that are billionaires that are making like billions off the i'm not going to say suffering of other people yeah there's people that are benefiting but for the far majority of social media justin what what would you estimate is positive versus negative oh five to ninety five yeah i agree i think it's i think it's the same man people every tom dick and harry is voicing their complaint right now one hundred percent and it's not going anywhere because we think that sitting there on facebook or instagram and complaining about stuff is actually going to get the government to change things or change society no it starts at home right it starts in your communities it starts with that if you're going to post anything post something positive you know i had a conversation with my wife my wife is like just such an innocent soul like she is she is the most naive and innocent soul soul i've ever met and she was posting stuff on social media and my wife likes fancy stuff and she posted a couple of things and actually i just sat there and i said you can't do that anymore and she's like what do you mean and she's like i'm happy that i got this and i just wanted to share it with my friends i said yeah that's great you're sharing it with your friends but what about all the other girls that are following you that don't have the ability to purchase the stuff that you purchase or live the life that you live like it's great to say that but there's other people out there that just aren't as fortunate that are looking at that and saying now my life kind of feels like i suck or it sucks that much more because i can't live up to that that is one of the biggest things especially with women justin now if we take a look at what the impact is on people's confidence and all this kind of stuff it's having a big challenge but i think maybe i'm sounding like i'm rambling here but i think this really has to hit home for some people i think a lot of people are realizing it i think there's a lot of parents out there realizing it because we have kids that are running around with smartphones and they're on social media and we're like why the heck does a twelve year old have to be on facebook they got school they can interact with their friends then they don't need to come back and interact with them after that you can well you know what but parents are saying it's okay to do that these days right so and so down the street allows their kid to do that so why shouldn't i but there's a time we got to step up and say that's.

Not ideal you're exactly right and it goes back to setting those boundaries goes back to setting the boundaries in the people that you're around and what you take in you said you deleted the facebook ad free off your phone well that's a boundary that you've set you no longer have that temptation you no longer have that opportunity and the other thing that you brought up was people are comparing themselves with people down the street well this is what the johnsons are doing or this is what the sangas are doing it doesn't matter play your game the reason that we keep losing in life in our games is because we're trying to play somebody else's.

You know that's a really good point whose frigging game are we trying to play here like i'm still trying to figure it out like you know are we playing mark zuckerberg's game are we playing trump's game whose game are we trying to play here like how do we it's a question for you actually how do we actually create our own game where do we go back to those days where family units actually pay attention to family units and what was important to them as a family we.

Need to take a step back we need to pause and we need to figure out what our game is because i don't think we have clarity on what our game is and the moment that we get clarity on what our game is what our purpose what our mission what our focus is that's where we start driving because guess what nobody knows the rules of your game better than you do nobody knows the moves that you need to make in order to succeed at your game better than you do because guess what your values your purpose and your mission are all going to drive the moves that you make so you may not even know what they are today but guess what you'll know what they are tomorrow you'll know what they are the next day because what's happening in front of you the more clear you get the more focused you get the more energized you get the more passionate you get it creates that clarity for you and that you can not lose at your game but you sure as hell can lose on somebody else's really good point i.

Think that's really really that's got to hit home and you're absolutely right because we're playing everybody else's game not our.

Own and so as you guys are sitting there as you're listening to this think about what your game is where does your game start have you even thought about that when's the last time you laughed in your game when's the last time you got joy from your game are you seeking joy from somebody else's game somebody else's joy might be temporary but how do you seek sustainable long term joy long term fulfillment long term passion long term purpose from anybody else's game other than yours and i want you to think about what you need to do to come back to your game these three questions what is your purpose what are your core values and what is your mission what result do you want to see happen and forget about all the noise that's out there forget everybody else's game and stick to yours so that you can create the steps and actionable items that are going to get you further along so that you can win at your game so as you guys go forward i want you to stay hungry i want you to stay humble and i want you to play your game because nobody else is going to win at your game better than you we'll see you next week thank you so much for joining us for another week of the coaches council if it wasn't for you viewers and listeners we wouldn't have a platform so again it's all about you guys and we want to give you a reward just for listening we want to give you access to each one of our coaches for a little bit deeper intimate experience so if you go to coaches dash counsel dot com coaches council dot com subscribe and like to whatever platform you're viewing on you're going to be entered to have that one on one experience so be sure to go coach coaches dash counsel dot com and really interact with us because we would love to interact with you until then stay safe stay hungry stay humble and thanks for listening.