From Adversity to Growth: How Accountability Transformed My Life & Relationships

Some accountability with my health. When I do the stuff I'm supposed to do. When I was at the gym this morning with my trainer and I ate the right things this morning, I'm accountable to myself with that, but I'm also accountable to my family because I need to be healthier longer because I have a brand new son. Like, I need to live to be a hundred so he gets to enjoy his dad. So I think it's when to own it, you really have to be accountable in different categories of your life and understand the accountability is not just to you, it's to the people you care about.

This is the Own it show where we tell stories of how. How everyday people made ownership theirs. Everybody, welcome back to the Own It Show. I'm your host, Justin Rothling Schofer. And if you're new here, congratulations, you found us. It is so good to see you. So good to have you. And we tell stories of people who have made ownership theirs. There's over 280 different podcasts that you can choose from over the past three years. And at the end of the day, we just aim to influence empowerment, educate, and really help you take ownership of your life so that you can realize your God given potential. If there's anything that's ever been, something that's moved you, something that's changed through your life, something that's impacted you, I'd love if you dropped us a review. I'd love if you left us a little note and just shared it with someone you love, because that's the only way that we reach people at the level in which we desire. And so I am so excited about our guest today because Chris and I actually met. And again, we know nothing's random, but Chris and I actually met about six months ago at a speaking engagement that he was at. And I was there visiting John Gordon and his coach, I believe was speaking Ben Newman and John knew each other and so they connected the four of us together and it was just so cool to see how it organically works. And then, lo and behold, I realized that he's also a Wiley brother. May basically get in his book published through Wiley. I'm published through Wiley. So as soon as we knew that we had that in common, I was like, oh my gosh, I got to have this guy on. And so the uniqueness of Chris's story of taking ownership of your life and not being bound by circumstance, not being bound by situation, not being bound by tough breaks, but rather leaning in and seeing the gratitude in things, seeing the greatness and things, seeing the opportunity in things and taking action. I just can't tell you how much you've influenced my life and my mindset in the way that I show up and I approach things. So, Chris, it's been so cool to just get to know you. I know you're a performance coach. You touch thousands of people and impact people in a big, big way. You're an author. You're coming out with one Jordan, which we're going to talk about today. Guys, you are just going to be floored when you hear this story. It's amazing. I'm so excited. If you. I'll drop the link in the, in the bio so you can get access to it. But speaking and hosting a podcast and just influencing people all around. And so, Chris, it is so great to have you on and just thank you for spending time with us.

Thanks, Justin. My pleasure. It's my pleasure. It's. It's crazy how our paths crossed and it crossed because of one Jordan. Like, literally, like I met Ben Newman originally because of one Jordan. And I did the same with, with John Gordon. Kind of rhymes a little bit with John Gordon. And. And then we get an introduction backstage in an event. So this, this, the way this whole book has worked has been. It blew my mind, the strategy, right? Like, I knew that I could connect with people by taking one Jordan shoe, sending a handwritten note that says, please accept the shoes, a gift. If you want the other shoe, give me a call. So I, I tested it, right? Like, I sent it out to Ben Newman was my second. Damon west was the first person that ever responded. Damon and I are super. We're really close friends now. We talk a couple times a week. And Ben has become my mentor, my coach, and my friend because of sending this one Jordan shoe. And after that happened, I decided to write a book. I'm like, I think that I want to do as many of these as I can and put some stories together and show people how to network at a super high level with something that is unique, right? That's unique and a bold statement. So that's how we got the book and that's how today's February 27th. We're recording this. And if you hear a little bit of shakiness in my voice, it's because we're releasing the book at seven o'clock tonight. And then you really find out what's going to happen. Right?

I love it. It's so, so great. I. I'd love for you just to give a little bit of context as to your story, Chris, just you as an individual, you as a human, kind of how you've come up and gotten to this point. Because there's a couple things that I want to talk about as we dive deeper. I want to talk about the difference between networking and connecting. There's a massive difference to me between networking and connecting. And what you're doing is you're connecting. You're connecting with people because you're ultimately creating this personalization to what you're doing and a deep level of connection. You're not sending out 400 emails saying, hey, we'd love to connect with you. You're actually getting a shoe. Like, you're literally going and paying with your own money to grab a pair of Jordans that you hold one back. You get this person you've sought after. You've managed to get this person's address, whether it's their office, whether it's their home, whether it's whatever, putting a personalized note in there that I'm sure has a whole bunch of research on that individual has a whole bunch of personal things that connects with them, which I want to hear about in a second. And then you send it off to them and. And then you give them your personal number. Like that is truly connecting. And so I want to dive down that road.

One thing you left out, Justin, you have to get their shoe size, too, which is always an awkward question.

That is right. That is right.

Like, that is the probably the most awkward part of it. If you can see. Can you see the three Jordans behind me on camera? There, you see those? Okay, so this one right here is going to Sal for Sella, who's the CEO of First Form. Right. That one in the middle is sent. Was sent to John Maxwell two weeks ago. And then the one on the end is going to a guy named. Named Neil Dingra, who owns a company called Forward Academy. But I had to get their shoe sizes. That's the cr. Like, that's the tough part sometimes. So I met John at lunch back in November and at this event, and I got to go and talk to him. And I said, hey, John, what's your shoe size? He looked at me. He's like, size 11. I said, thanks, man. I appreciate it. That's it. And so I get it personally sometimes, but sometimes I have to go through an assistant to get to somebody else. Ben got me a shoe size for Sal. I had to get Ben's shoe size from his assistant. So that's the tough part, is the shoe size is figuring out what, you know, what the shoe size is, but a little more about me. So, look, I'm a son of a drug addict. I was a college dropout, and I'm a survivor of infant loss. And when I look at all the things that I've been able to overcome through my life, besides being born with a limb difference, which is my brand, obviously, one hand at a time, I feel that God put me in the position I am today because of the way I performed. To get through everything that I've been through in my life, like I'm in this rare air, is what I would consider doing what I love, making a living at it, changing people's lives and impacting them because of the things I was able to survive along the way. Right. And I feel that I have a responsibility to help the people I. I was 5, 10, 15 years ago. And when I realized that my life changed, I pivoted. I was sitting on my back deck journal. I was open up my journal. We had lost our son in 2020. CJ, he passed away from cardiomyopathy hyperplasia. And I went into a dark spot for about eight months. I lost touch with everybody. We wouldn't let visitors come over. I mean, it was a really challenging time. And about eight months in on a Sunday morning, I'm sitting out back on the lanai, and I open up my journal, and I start reading through the journal. Because, see, I'd taken all these notes and put everything in this journal that was about the things I was going to do with my son. All the things I. All these excited, just. I'm so excited of the things we were going to do. And I started reading it, and then I thought to myself, he's watching me. He's watching what's going on. C.J. sees what's. What I'm doing, and he's probably not real proud of me right now. So at that moment, I decided it was time for me to share my story and be more open about the way I grew up, the challenges of being raised by a drug addict, and then what's gone through with the infant loss later in life. Because there's people that need to hear it. There's people that need to hear that voice from an average guy like me that's been able to get through these things. Right. I have a tattoo on my arm. I don't know if you can see that or not, but it says, C.J. is watching, and that's my burn. I look at that every morning when I get up. If I have Challenges throughout the day. Justin, I look down on my arm and I know that he is watching me. I gotta be honest, for that eight month period, my relationship with God was not very good because I couldn't understand how my God would put me through that. Right? How my God would let this, this poor kid not make it. And then when I became at peace with it, I had a responsibility that I needed to change my life and the trajectory and, and be as impactful as possible. I mean, the last two years, the word, my word has been impact. And it'll continue to be impact because when I get up every day, I want to make a positive impact on everybody I touch.

It's beautiful. It's beautiful as, even as you tell that story, there's something that you just said is like CJ is watching like that, just so powerful knowing that the decisions we're making, the things you're actively choosing, even on a day that it doesn't feel great, the, the one that you lost, the one that was so close to you is watching and you said something else is, CJ wouldn't be very proud of where I'm at right now.

Yeah.

And I think that, I think that just, I think that a lot of people can resonate with that. There's been loss in everybody's life of some thing or someone. And whether it was a relationship, whether it was a child, whether it was a parent, whether it was a brother, a sister, a best friend, is knowing that, hey, you have the gift of air in your lungs and ground under your feet that you can go and change your outcome. You can change your circumstance today. And when you tell the story, I see so much of Job in you. I don't know if you're familiar with the story of Job, but just this faithful servant, this faithful warrior of God, God, and ultimately he stripped everything away because Satan just goes, hey, he worships you, he loves you, he's great because he's got everything going for him. And he's like, test him. And as you've gone through this test, you've come out just like Job on the other side. Just glorying and glorifying and happy and excited and still worshiping and still, still having him at your, at your core. And it ultimately is culminating in a lot of blessings that are coming out of this because you've just stayed faithful. And I think a lot of people listening to this right now need to hear that word. They need to hear this word that no matter how hard it gets, no matter how hard something is, no matter how depth in the valley you are, continue to keep coming back to that level of faith and knowing that this is shaping you, knowing that it's refining you, knowing it's setting you up and if you stay faithful, you, you will be rewarded for it on the other side.

Yeah, I couldn't agree more. As, as we're recording this, you can't hear this, but I can hear in the background of my house, my 11 week old son and my wife is in there playing with him in the other room. So almost four years later, after CJ passed, we were blessed with Leo Christopher, his little brother. And he is incredibly healthy and has just got a great demeanor. He is just a blessing like you wouldn't believe. And I can hear playing in the other room right now. It's. Right now it's his play time. Every day my wife and him play a little bit. So it would have been easy to give up and not try. It would have been easy to go the other way, take the path of least resistance and go down a rabbit hole and, and not, not become the person that, that God wanted me to be. And I, when I see, look, I'm 51 years old, right? So I can look back at times in my life, Justin, and I can say now I can say I had opportunities to do this before, these things were presented to me before, but I did not recognize them as that opportunity. Okay. I've had this uncanny ability to be a high level performer when it comes to sales and business. I've always been the top one person in the industry I've ever been in. But I would always figure out a way to sabotage that in the end by not doing the good things I'm supposed to do along the way.

And now hold on on that, hold on on that, that, that is, that's a, that's a big, big statement and I hope that rocks. A lot of people go down that road for a second because you've been a top end performer and getting results that top end level people are wanting and ultimately desiring. But, but yet you said you hadn't been doing the things that were necessary in order to. And establishing the habits.

Yeah.

Walk me through this a little bit.

Well, I can tell you from the start. So I was 28 or 29 the first time I made a million dollars. And again, I'm, I would be what some consider an uneducated guy. I dropped out of college after my freshman year and what happened was when I started making all that money, I lost sight of what I did to get There I lost sight of being nice to people, putting in the work every day and understanding it, because I had these goals of if I could just build this big house, make a million dollars in a year, have all the Rolex watches I wanted and anything else, then I'm there. And when I got there, I just stopped working. I stopped doing the things that got me there. Ben talks a lot about being seduced by success. I was seduced by success. I mean, think about it. The son of a drug addict, right, who grew up not knowing what was going to happen through the majority of his life, is now living in a community where everybody's doctors and lawyers and have all these initials after their name. My house is the biggest one in the neighborhood, right? I look like I should be on MTV Cribs. I have five automobiles out front. Like, I didn't know what to do next, but to just lay back and relax, because I thought that was the finish line. I didn't realize that I had a responsibility to keep working for my family and everybody else that was relying on me, but also to the people that were like me. Like, I look at it now, I'm like, gosh, I could have helped so many people back then by showing how I got to where I did in. In understanding that. And look, things just got sideways from there a few times. And I had a marriage that failed about 14 years ago, and I've been with my wife now for 12 years, and she turned my life around as far as making me realize that I deserved better than what I was treating myself and look good. That's a tough thing to, like, a tough thing to. To realize that when you're raised in that state of not knowing if mom's going to be high or not, not knowing if the electric bill is going to be paid or not not knowing any of those things, right? You settle, right? So I settled for relationships along the way. And I thought I should have been treated a certain way. I thought that's how. That's how you get treated, right? That's what you deserve to be treated like. And then when you. I sat down and I really got clarity on how I wanted to live the rest of my life. And two years later, I met. I met my wife. I went into a doctor's office to have two warts removed off my hand, and in came this beautiful woman to remove them. And I called the office later that day and asked if she was single and ended up having a conversation with her and asked her on a date.

And.

And the rest is History. And I would. And she's so far out of my league. Justin, I know this isn't exactly dialed in on the book, but I think it's just something I needed to share that she's so far out of my league on what I thought I deserved. And now I'm in this, this wonderful relationship with her and have been for a very long time. It. I feel now that it's important to share the story with people. Right? Like, people need to hear that. Don't settle, like, don't settle for what you. What everybody else says you deserve. Go after what you want. I mean, and what, what you feel is. Is the relationship you need to be in.

It's so good. And I. And I would also bet that what you had to do in order to get to that point was you also had to prepare yourself. You had to prepare yourself differently than what you were doing previously.

So let me tell you a story about that. This goes right in. Well, first, the first thing, and this goes into what I know you believe in wholeheartedly, is that the first thing I did is when I, when I realized that I needed to turn my life around after my divorce is I really got in charge of my fitness and I started eating right and working out and understanding habits and, and living that lifestyle, which in turn gave me confidence to step outside of my comfort zone and ask someone like her out. But the, the day that, the day that I gave, left my number for her to call me. She calls my number, I'm at work. I know it's her. I can tell the number, where it's coming from. So I just, I let it go to voicemail. I wasn't ready yet because what I did was I grabbed one of my sales guys that's working for me and we went to an office and we role played because I had to prepare myself for her to say no. I don't date patients. I don't do this, I don't do that. So I said, say this and let me. So we. Objection. Handle role played for the conversation because I'm a sales guy, right? So I wanted to make sure I didn't just go right. So I asked her out. I first asked her if she was single, and then I asked her on that, said, hey, you want to. Would you like to grab dinner? And then, Justin, she said yes. And I didn't know what to do because I prepared myself for like six no's, right? Like, but she said yes. So.

It'S so amazing. And I say this often. Is what you're praying for is so far less than what you're actually called for. But what you're praying for, you're not yet prepared for. And so being able to realize that you have to prepare yourself differently, Knowing that you have to prepare yourself for what's already prepared for you and being able to choose something different is literally what you did is literally what you've done. And it's a testament to how you live and. And how you show up. And again, guys, I don't want you to miss this. Like, there was so much goal dropped in the last five minutes here, but don't settle. Don't settle for what it is that you think you deserve. Don't settle for the safe way out. Don't settle for what it is that you think you've made it, because the moment you think you made it is the moment that you lost. And you have to continue to show up every day and put the work in, because when you continue to put the work in, that's when you ultimately start thriving and start moving forward and go from a place of survival to thriving. The. The other thing I want to make mention here is that, and hopefully this resonates with a lot of you is a lot of you have put up false peaks, false pinnacles, artificial finish lines where you're like, man, I'm going to lose £20 and life's going to be good. Or, man, I'm going to make a million bucks and life's going to be good. I'm going to buy that house, Life's going to be good. I'm going to get married. Life's going to be good. Life doesn't have a finish line, friends. The finish line happens when you're six feet under and you get to go sit at the right hand of God and say, hey, how did I do? And so you have to keep running your race every single day. Just like Chris realized. Just like Chris learned. So that as he continued to step up, as he continued to show up, he continued to realize further blessings. Blessings, further opportunities and further things that he knew he was prepared and called for. And so I just. I. I just think that's so good, Chris, because again, you. You settled for everything. And I want to talk about something you mentioned here with settling for relationships. Dive into that for me a little bit as to what you mean by settling for relationships.

Yeah, I think that I settled for someone that I felt was paying attention to me. And part of that goes back to. I didn't have a lot of confidence when it came to dating or asking girls out because of my arm, which is crazy to hear me say that today. But as a kid, you don't want to be different, right? But as an adult, being different is the best way to be. Well, I didn't have the confidence to ask out the people that I wanted to ask out. So when someone showed me attention, I felt like that's all that I deserved. So that's what I mean by settling for a relationship. And then I think that a lot of times we settle along the way, and I ask myself, friends. Like, I have friends that come to me that may be having a challenging relationship. And I always ask this question. I'm like, if you met your spouse today, would you still marry her? Your spouse today, would you still marry him? And my question is, yeah, a thousand times over. But if your question, your answer is no, then you need to go back and figure out what to do to get back to that yes stage. And a lot of people don't. They settle, right? They settle. Oh, you know, it's, hey, every Saturday we go to Home Depot or whatever. This is what we do. We don't do date night anymore, whatever. And I think when we stop dating our spouse, game over. Just game over.

Yeah, totally get it. And, guys, I. Man, there's just stuff that you say, Chris, that just, like, starts to drive my mind. And listeners, if this is your first podcast, go back and listen to a few of the ones previous. Because I talk about the concept of different. I talk about the concept of owning you're different. Because you're different is your uniqueness, and your uniqueness is your gift. And Chris just said, being different as a kid is hard, but being different as an adult is what separates you. And if we can find that point earlier in life, if we can find out what makes us different, what makes us unique and embrace that and love that and lean into that, man, it's going to just take us so much further. Because think about God looking down at you going, man, Chris, I created you this way on purpose. I created you this way for a reason. And stop being ashamed of what our difference is. Whether it's a limb that doesn't look like others, whether it's a blemish on your face that doesn't look like others, whether it's a personality that isn't like others, whether it's a specific skill set that maybe is a little embarrassing, that you are shying or hiding away. He wants to shine light on that thing. He wants to use that to ultimately empower others. And create some changes. And so that is just so beautiful because you've taken this thing that once was something that caused you to hide, just like almost. And I'm just kind of seeing this whole story play out caused you to hide, and then losing your son almost made C.J. pull you out of hiding and now have relationships on purpose. Coming back to now, what this One Jordan book is all about, which is literally creating relationships on purpose and not just networking in order to climb the ladder and get something back, but to know I really want to create relationship with this person on purpose. I want to connect with this person on purpose and doing that through the One Jordan.

Yeah. I mean, so when you talked about a minute earlier on networking and connecting Difference, the book is actually titled how to One Jordan how to Connect with High Performers. So I really came down to defining my list. And inside the book, there's a QR code that everyone can scan and it'll help them create their Jordan list. Like, if they wanted to do the same thing, whether it was a Jordan or whatever it is. I chose the Jordan shoe because if you can tell I'm a big Jordan collector, there's a bunch on the wall behind me. I wear. It's such an iconic brand, right? It transcends generations to the point I'm 51. I way more pairs than I would disclose on the air. And my son, who is 11 weeks old, he's got like four or five pair already, right? So, like, think about that. That's a 50 year gap and it's still. People wear it. When you see me speak at events, I always wear Jordans with my suits. That's my brand. That's who I am, right? So what a better way to connect than utilize that shoe that most people know what it is, right? And then I had to define that list. And Damon west was the first one. Great connection. Damon and I are. I mean, like, like I said, I talked to Damon regularly. I mean, that's. We just hit it off. And I. I put Damon on my list because I heard him on the Ed My Lap podcast. I was like, I got to connect with this guy. How can I do that? Ben Newman was somebody I would have been following for a few years. I said, how can I connect with Ben Newman? I did that, right? And then Ben Newman was able to get the shoe size for John Gordon. So I sent a shoe to John Gordon, and I was texting with John yesterday about the book release. Like, Chris Welton, son of a drug addict, college dropout, text John Gordon, like, I have John Gordon's number in my phone. Like, like, like, that's crazy that I think about that, because I decided to send one Shoe to start a relationship. And it's been amazing what I've been able to do so far. Clinton Sparks. I mean, if anybody knows who Clinton Sparks is, but if you don't, his taglines get familiar. So get familiar. He has produced over 80 million albums that have been sold. 80 million. I mean, that's unreal. But I won. Jordan to Clinton Sparks. I can call Clinton right now and get him on the phone. Like, we connected. We built a friendship because I sent one shoe right now. The difference. But what a lot of people will do is they'll send the shoe and go, hey, they called me. Okay, now what? Yeah, now what? So I've been able to push that David Meltzer. I was on his IG Live yesterday morning because I sent David Meltzer one Jordan. If you see David Meltzer on. On any Instagram post on TV or anything he does from his home studio, the Jordan is sitting behind him on the wall that I sent him. Like, it's right there. So I connected with him. I was on his IG Live because I sent the one Jordan. You know? Now, there have been some people that haven't responded yet. My guy, Ed Mylett, hasn't responded yet. I did ask him his shoe size in person in Las Vegas back in October. He looked at me really weird, like, told me my size, and I sent it to him. I know that he's got it because I talked to his. His assistant, which is his sister. We'll see what happens. Lewis House sent me the shoe back. Said he was not interested. So, hey, at least I got the shoe back. I could. I can do it again, right? Dan Bartel did send the shoe back, but Dan still did a call with me. He said he just doesn't wear Jordans. It was a. Don't worry about it. He sent the shoe back, and he did a call with me, and I still wrote a whole chapter on him in my book. So it's been pretty successful to connect with those people. But then it's about, what are you going to do next? What are you going to do next? Right.

That's a great question. And it all comes back, to be honest with you, is intention is what is your intention? And I think the difference between networking and connecting is your intention to network is to get something. To connect is to give something. And when you can show up with a desire to give, it allows you to move forward. In such a powerful way. And the best way that I can define who I would want to build a relationship with or who I want to connect with is who will benefit that I haven't met yet from the two of us connecting.

Love it.

And that's, that's a question I always ask myself. So with Chris Welton and I connecting, who is going to benefit that I haven't met yet? I know there's a lot of things that we can do that when I send out your book to our email list, that when people read this book, it's going to impact them. I don't know who it is, I don't know who it is yet, but I know it's going to benefit somebody. So that is the benefit of us connecting. I don't know who's going to listen to this podcast and immediately going to be moved, but that's why we're connecting. I don't know what opportunity it is going to have you on our stage or connect you with somebody else that can get you on a stage or vice versa, but those people will benefit because that's the message that's inside, Chris, and that's the message that's here, and that is always my barometer for ultimately ending up connecting with somebody is who that I have yet to meet will benefit from the two of us connecting.

I love that. I mean, I, I, yeah, I mean that's, that's, that's magic, man. I mean that, that is thinking about things that way when you connect with people, takes it to a whole other level. Right? Because too many people are thinking about what can they do for me. Right?

Totally.

What can they do for me? And, and here, here's one of the cool things. John Maxwell, one of my, I mean, obviously people that follow you, listen to you. I'm sure they love John Maxwell. Right? I mean, I would say that falls into the same kind of category. So John, John loves to ask you this question and he'll ask you, he'll, he'll look at you and he'll say, justin, who do you know that I should know? John Maxwell asks you, who do you like? Like, that's the, like, think about that. What's he written? 90 best selling books. I know what we paid him to speak at this event I was part of in last year and he flew there in his private jet because we asked him if he could stay longer. When's your flight leave? He goes, my flight leaves. When I tell the pilot to leave, I'm like, oh, we're good. We're good. But he asked that question, who do you know that I should know? Why do we stop? Why does the average person stop asking that question? Right. And what can I do for you? Like, what can I do? Like, what can I do right now to help Justin? You know, and. And when you come from that place, it just brings the. It brings good to you. And people understand that that's the kind of person you are. You're not in it just for that. Right. Just for yourself.

Yep. 100. And that. And I. And I. What I love about that, Chris, is like, we've. We've obviously met each other in person a few times and cross paths for about 10 minutes at Amberly Lagos when we were getting that podcast done. And it's. You just. You just breathe that. You know, what I mean is being able to know, hey, how can I impact you? How can I support you? How can I show up for you? And when you start to get around people and you create a little tribe of people that are wondering, how can I benefit you? Meaning how can I benefit the other seven or eight people in my inner circle? You know, and this is not why it happens, but you know for a fact that those people are having thousands of conversations with other people, and they have you at the forefront of their mind as well. How could this potentially benefit Justin? How could I ultimately set this person up? How could I. I need to make this connection. And I can't tell you how many great things in my life have occurred simply because I developed great relationships. Everything positive in my life has developed because I've developed and learned how to build great relationships. And once we understand that people are the key to life, people are the key to joy, people are the key to. To success in many ways. And it's not transactional, but a deep relationship. That is when life changes. That is when life changes because you never go into a relationship wanting something. You want to go into a relationship giving and serving. And when that is your heart posture, there's a far difference between. I think it's become so cool and cliche to say, oh, what can I do for you? Or how can I serve you? No, no, no, don't ask me how you can serve me. Come in. Knowing who I am, knowing what my desires are, knowing what my is, knowing what God's put on my heart, understanding who I am, genuinely wanting to get to know who I am, and then serving me. Maybe not on that moment, but ultimately the fact that it's a week, a month, a year later, and you consistently have that person pop into your mind and you serve them by sending them a connection, by connecting them with somebody, by buying their book, by throwing something out for them, by putting them on a podcast, getting them on a stage something, serving their kids, serving their family. Like what can you do? Because that is where the interest level lies. And that's why, Chris, when you look at my relationship index, my inner circle is pretty small because I can't build really good relationships with thousands of people. That would be inauthentic. You can build really great relationships with about 20 to 30.

Yeah, I agree. And I, I think that one of the things that comes to mind is relationship capital. And, and I want to, want to break that down. And it, for me, I'm always looking at a way to get people introductions to someone else. Like that's like in, in. And it's not a capitalizing that's going in the bank capital. It's, it's just building stronger relationships. Right?

Totally.

When I refer somebody to somebody that I, that, that I, I trust, what that tells them is that I'm thinking about them. Right. Both parties. I'm thinking about you. Yeah. Right. And I care about you. And, and that's, that's a lost art in my opinion. Right. It's a lost 100. I introduce someone. Like I'll give you an example. I won't use the names, but I've got a friend of mine, well, I have several friend of mines that are mines that are entrepreneurs that operate at a super high level. Right. Like on bunch of doors, real estate, big contracting companies. And then I meet these guys out in Las Vegas recently, they were tax specialists and had dinner with them. So the first thing I was thinking about is, okay, these guys are legit because they, I know people they know. Like in my community, they knew people that I knew. Who can I help with this information they just gave me? So I just started getting on my phone a text message and doing introductions for people. And I think last count, I've introduced seven high end entrepreneurs to these guys and they've all went into business with them to help with their tax strategies. You know, this isn't about Chris Welt making a dollar. That's not it at all. It's about letting them know I care about them and I want them to continue to flourish and grow. And I appreciate what these guys do over here and the way they do it. So yeah, I think it's a lost art. Everybody wants to become a affiliate. Yeah, I can refer. Can I get 10%? No, like that. That's not how this. In my opinion, that's not the right way to do it.

Yep. No, I. I couldn't agree with you more. And I forget the quote as to who said it, but it goes something like this. I'll probably butcher it a little bit, but it's. If you help thousands of people get what they want, you're going to have Zig Ziglar more than Zig Ziglar says.

If to get what you. If you help enough people get they want in life, you'll get what you want.

That's exactly.

Yeah. Because I've asked Car Guy, you know, that's where I started my career. So I know Zig Ziglar. Yeah, that was the. Yeah, that was the one I was scripting. But. But it's so true. It's so true. Yeah.

You know, I love it. That's so good. Chris, for somebody who lives their life in ownership, what would you say is your definition, in a word or a phrase, of the ownership?

Oh, gosh. Yeah. I didn't get this, Cliff. I didn't get to study for this one.

I never. I never, never give this one.

Believe ownership is.

Yes. Word or a phrase.

I mean the words. Accountability. Accountability. I mean, and that's accountability in everything that you do. Like some accountability with my health, when I do the stuff I'm supposed to do when I was in the gym this morning with my trainer and I ate the right things this morning, I'm accountable to myself with that, but I'm also accountable to my family because I need to be healthier longer because I have a brand new son. Like, I need to live to be 100 so he gets to enjoy his dad. So I think it's when to own it. You really have to be accountable in different categories of your life and understand the accountability is not just to you, it's to the people you care about.

So good. I love it. I love it. Where can people find your book, Chris? I know it's coming out today. It's literally dropping. If you're on our email list, you're going to be getting an email next Wednesday kind of outlining some of these things and some of the cool things that Chris has going on with one Jordan, but where can people find it? Where can people get access to it? So Amazon.

Amazon's probably the best place to get it. Barnes and Noble is going to have it out in a couple weeks, but Amazon's where we're releasing everything tonight. You can always go to Chris Welton Live. L. I V E. And that's my website. There'll be a spot in there. You can buy the book and subscribe to my podcast and see whatever, you know, everything else that I have going on.

So good. I absolutely love it. Absolutely love it. Chris, it's been so great having you on and just I love your heart, I love your mission, and just such a blessing.

Thanks, man. I appreciate you guys.

As you go forward, I really encourage you to go. Go pick up a couple of copies of one Jordan, send it to some people, connect with some people, some people that you've met. Like, you know what? I've been meaning to connect with you. I've been meaning to dive in with you. And maybe you're in a season of your life where you've lost touch with everyone. Maybe if you're in a season of life where you've gone through some hard times and you've felt like you need to isolate, you felt like you need to step backwards. I challenge you. Is who is that CJ in your life who is that CJ in your life that needs to call you out? Who do you need to look into and say, man, am I doing the best that I can with what I've been given? Am I doing the best way I can with what I've been blessed with? Is there more for me? Is there another opportunity that I can step into? And ultimately, have I started to just settle for what it is that I think I deserve? Have I just started to settle with what it is that I think I've been blessed with? But actually, how can I lean in? And how can I grow this thing? How can I steward this thing? How can I go after what it is that's already been prepared for me, but realizing that I ultimately have to start preparing myself? Because what you've been called for is greater than what you're praying for, but what you're praying for, you're just not yet prepared for. And so you have to be able to dive in because we know that your different is in you for a reason. And what do we always say? Success is different. So own your different. And we'll see you guys next week.