Being Ready v. Being Willing

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Hello, I'm Katie McManus, business strategist and leadership coach. Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, wherever you are in the world. Today is day seven. I'm gonna run out of finger soon. Day seven of me going live every day for the month of September. September 7th. That's how that works. Anyway, today I'm going live to the Facebook pages, to LinkedIn, to YouTube, and to Twitter, even though I don't really exist on Twitter that much. Hi, guys. If anyone's watching there. Anyway, just sharing this because sometimes when people comment in different channels, it doesn't show up for me here. And I don't want you to take it personally because I love for these. These lives to be interactive. If you comment, I want to call you out, but if I don't call you out, if I don't say hi, if I don't answer your question, it is not personal. I'm not ignoring you. It just. Sometimes the technology fails us. Anyway, today I want to talk about a topic that I got reminded of yesterday, and it's the difference between two words that I hear a lot when I'm talking to people about potentially working together. So there is this anti battle cry that weenies have all over the world, and I've used it myself. Okay, I am a weenie as well. I'm not calling anyone out for being a weenie when I'm not willing to call myself out as well. And it's not being ready to do something. Because here's what happens when we say when we're, like, all excited about something that we really, really want to do, and then we pump the brakes because we're not ready. Right? How it usually works is like, you go to join a gym, right? And you get there and you're really excited and you're motivated to work out and get back in shape. And then you look around and you get a little intimidated because there are people there who know what they're doing. There are people there who seem a lot more confident than you are, and there are people who are fitter than you, and there are people who are obviously more successful than you. Hi, Sean. Oh, you have a rainy London day. I. I have to admit, I love the rain. I think I should probably live in London because you guys get it a lot. London or Seattle? Either one. I just love the rain. I get so Much done when it's raining, anyway. Hi. Hi, Sean. But you just get intimidated and, and so then you get back to the, the office with the membership advisor and you're talking about membership options and you just kind of think, you know what? I, I need to get ready before I come here. I need to work out a little bit. I need to lose some weight before I come here. I need to get ready to get ready to get ready to get ready to maybe be ready to actually do this. And you see where I'm going here, right? Like, like you join a gym to accomplish getting fit. You join a gym to accomplish your fitness goals, your health goals. You don't put off going to the gym because at that point where that person is feeling like they need to get fit, is feeling like they need to lose weight, it's feeling like they need to work out more. Their life up until now has not allowed them to do so, right? There's been something going on in their life that it has not already happened, right? So unless they make a change, there has to be some kind of shift in the paradigm where it's now possible for them to work out. It's now built in, right? Oftentimes joining a gym is one of those things where like, well, I joined the gym, I have to go now. And hello, LinkedIn user from Southern California, where I hear it's really, really, really hot. And just so you know, you're showing up as LinkedIn user because I think you have a privacy setting saying that if people aren't connected to you, then they can't see your name. So just a heads up, but I would love to hear what your name is so that I can say hi. So this happens in our businesses too. I talk to prospective clients fairly often and, and they're so clear on what it is that they want to build. They're so clear on how much money they want to make out of this business, and they're super clear on the impact on how, how they want to help their clients and what they want to help their clients achieve. And then we get to the point where we're talking about working together and it gets real. It gets real and there's an investment and there's a choice that they have to make. And, and this choice really doesn't have to do with the money. The choice has to do with betting on themselves, putting their money where their mouth is and saying, you know what? I believe in myself enough that I can go and do this. If I change something right now, if I shift the paradigm. If I just learn how. Right? So when people hold off because they want to feel ready, there are actually three things that they really want. Number one is they want to feel confident. They want to feel confident that they can do this. Okay, I made up, like, a whole story in this post about my nephew Timmy. I don't have a nephew, okay? My sister doesn't have any children. Timmy is not an actual person. He's not lost in the roads of America. There were no breaks even on the bike to teach him because the bike didn't exist also. But, you know, when you're learning how to ride a bike, you're not confident in it until you've ridden the bike a couple dozen times. Right? When you start, like, who. Who, like, is confident in asking people out? I don't know. I like. I've asked a lot of people out, and I'm still not confident in doing that. Who's confident? Interviews. Right? To be confident interviews, you either have to be a sociopath or a psychopath, or you have to have done it a lot. You have to have practiced interviewing a crap ton. Okay? Confidence does not come before the doing. Confidence does not come before failing a few dozen times. Confidence comes on the other side of that. So if you're waiting to be ready, and it's really you waiting to feel confident, baby, you're gonna be waiting forever. This is never gonna happen. If you're waiting to feel confident, okay? And I want to call you out on this because I know you have a gift to give. I know there are people out there in the world who are just. They don't realize it, but they are waiting for you to show up in their awareness and tell them how you can help them. And they're gonna. They're waiting to sign up with you because they know that that's going to change their life. You waiting to feel confident is actually robbing them of that opportunity. It's robbing them of the life that could be possible if they had you in their corner. Right? So we're not waiting to feel confident. Right? That's a weenie stance. Okay? That is. That is a red flag that you're being a big old weenie in your life and in your business. Okay? If you're waiting to feel confident about stuff. No, no, no, no. Confidence is built by doing. It's built by practicing. It's built by trying it live a few times. It's built by trying it live and failing miserably and then looking at the parts and saying, wow, I didn't do great at that. And this other part, I did kind of good on that, but that part I could have done better. And this other part I could have done better. And then mustering yourself up again to do it again, and then looking at the results and saying, wow, I got better at this part. Still not great at that part. But that part, I have that down pat. That's so good. And building on that skill set. Confidence comes from action. It doesn't come from sitting here and just waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting for confidence to just magically bestowed, be bestowed upon you. Okay, there's no thanks, Sean there. I like to say that there's no such thing as a store that sells confidence. If ever you're working with a coach and they're just saying, oh, well, just be confident, I want you to fire them because that's not how this happens. Just be confident is not anything that's helpful to you. Okay? If there were a confidence store, I think you would probably just sell Spanx. You know, the underwear that, like, sucks everything in for you and contains everything, keeps everything, like, scooped up. Hi, Muhammad. Welcome. On that note, so that's one thing that people actually mean when they say that they are waiting to be ready. Like, they want to be ready. They're just not ready right now. They're going to be ready later is they actually want to feel confident. Okay? So I'm calling, I'm calling BS on that. And hello from Iran. Welcome. The next thing they want is they want to be sure. They want to feel sure. And they can want to feel sure about a lot of things, right? So I don't know about you, but when I'm sure about something, I carry myself differently, right? When I'm. I'm pretty sure how I'm going to be received in a room, you know, I walk in with a little more oomph, right? But to be sure, it's. Again, you're not sure unless you've experienced something before, right? Like if I'm walking to a room of strangers, it's really hard to be sure, but, like, sure of what? I'm going to be sure that there's going to be a moment where I'm going to be uncomfortable. I'm sure that there's going to be a moment where I don't hear someone properly and I have to go, I'm sorry, what was your name again? How do you pronounce that? Can you say that again? Right? I can be sure that, like, there's going to be a moment where I'm like, well, where's the food? And where's. Where are the beverages? Right? There's going to be these moments of questioning, right? When I hear people say that they want to be sure. I'm hearing that they want to be able to walk into a room and not have any of those unsure moments. They want to be able to walk into their day, their work day, every single day, know exactly what they need to do. Bing, bang, boom. I'm sorry. I have had. Oh, God, it's embarrassing how many jobs I've had. I've had, like, 30 jobs in my life. I started working when I was really young, and oftentimes I had like, two jobs when I was in high school and college. But I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt, I have never had a single day where I walked into work, whatever job it was, and what I thought I was going to be tackling that day went exactly as planned. Okay? If you're waiting to feel sure in this business that you're starting that is brand new and doesn't have anything that's predictable about it, I want to remind you about every single job, every single class, every single event you have ever gone into that has other human beings in it, okay? Things never go to plan. You can never be sure what's going to happen next ever in your life. All right? Hi, Steven Doyle. So we have Ireland, we have Iran, we have uk and someone from Southern California whose name I can't see. This is so exciting, guys. All right, so if you're waiting to be sure, I want to call bullshit on you. That is a big weenie red flag, okay? You can't be sure about anything. You can't be sure about tomorrow. Hell, I can't be sure about the next minute. You know, a lightning bolt could come through my window and strike me. I really hope that doesn't happen. But we just. We cannot be sure. And if you're waiting to be sure to have that, that, that spunk, you know, that like, that verve that happens when you walk into a room and you're sure. Like, even if you were to walk into a room with a bunch of people who love you, you can't be sure what's going to happen, right? You're trying to walk into your business being sure, having that surety, just. It's not going to happen. You know, there will come a day in your business about two or three years in, where you get to the end of your day and you're like, yeah, that went about as I expected, right? But that's two or three years in. If you continue down this road of not knowing what you don't know, and that's holding you up from even starting your business. If you don't start, like, you can't get to that two or three years, then it's just never going to happen. All right? So when I hear people saying I'm not ready, it's either I want to feel confident first or I want that I want to be sure. Now, related to sure is number three is I want to guarantee if someone's not ready to do something. I don't care if it's their fitness goal. I don't care if it's moving to a new place to be happier. I don't care if it's starting a new relationship or starting a business if they're not ready, if they're really, like, holding off, like, I want to be ready first. Sometimes it's actually, I want to guarantee that this is going to work. I want to guarantee. I want you to write it on a piece of paper, you know, or on the box, like the Tommy Boy classic. Like, you know, guaranteed to work for a certain amount of time. There are no guarantees. You know, I wish there were a business type that was just guaranteed to be successful. I really do. And if there were, like, we know that everyone would have that business, okay? But starting a business is always a risk. There are zero guarantees when it comes to business, okay? That's why not everyone starts a business, because there's inherent risk, okay? There's no guarantees in your relationships. There's no guarantees with your car, your car. At some point, something's gonna break, something's gonna stop working. At some point it's just gonna get old and rusted and it's just not gonna work as well anymore, okay? Your body has no guarantees, okay? We live in meat suits of non guarantees. I understand the desire to want to have a guarantee out there and the desire to have a guarantee before you invest money and energy and dreams into something. But if you're waiting for a guarantee for this to work, you're going to be waiting a hell of a long time. And again, if you're waiting to be ready for any of these reasons for confidence, to be sure for that guarantee, you're robbing your potential clients who are waiting to be helped by you, you're robbing them of what's possible for them on the other side of working with you. And that's super fucking selfish. Sorry. I'm just gonna call it as I See, it. It's really selfish. It's also unkind to you because you know what kind of life is possible for you when you get over this? You know how proud you're going to be of yourself on the other side of trying this. Even if it doesn't go the way you want, even if it doesn't end up the way you imagine. By the way, I could show you all the. All the journals of me planning out how my business was going to grow and how much I was going to charge and how much I was going to make and how many clients I was going to have. None of it ever went to plan. It went better. My business, because I gave it my all. I bet on myself. I invested in it before it could even tell me it was going to work out. It could. Even before I could even indicate that it was possible it could work out. Honestly, it ended up better than I ever could have imagined. I've been able to help people that I love and respect, respect and am so incredibly excited for every damn day. I've been able to help them start their businesses and make their life whatever it is that they want. How cool is that? And that is completely possible for you in whatever work that you do. If you just pony up and bet on yourself already. If you own that, you're just being a weenie about it and get over that weenie self and just do it when you're not ready, because you're never going to be ready. The difference between being ready and being willing, because that's the topic of this. Being willing to try and fail, being willing to fail knowing you're going to fail. Being willing to just do it, you know, Being willing to do the things, take the actions that will get you the confidence. Being willing to walk into that room, being willing to go into a situation not being sure how it's going to go, and being willing to put the time and effort and energy and. And hopes and dreams into something even when you don't have a guarantee. That is the thing that builds successful businesses is that willingness. Right? So I would love to hear from you if, if you're willing to put it in the. In the chat, please do. If you want to DM to me if it's a little, you can do that too. What are you willing to put on the line to make your dreams real? What are you willing to put on the line to grow your business? What are you willing to do? It's different than what you're ready to do, right? I've been public Speaking and doing a speaking tour for the last couple years, virtually. I'm going to be speaking in person at an event next week. I'm super excited about it. The pandemic really messed with that. But I used to be terrible at public speaking. And when I say terrible, I mean, I had to read a letter at a big literary luncheon once in college. Just a letter, you know, from an author who couldn't make it. And I was so bad that after I finished and after, you know, everyone was done speaking, people in the audience came up to me to apologize to me for how bad I was. That is, how bad I was at just reading a letter. It was such a bad public speaker. I. I had this urge, though. I wanted to get good at it. I wanted to stand on stages. I wanted to be able to speak to people. I wanted people to do this, that. Stuttering and stammering and sweating through it. Like, here I am. This is. This is a version of public speaking. I forget about it because I'm so used to it now. I put in the work. I joined Toastmasters. And by the way, in Toastmasters, you have to just get up and do it. You're not just sitting there, like, writing notes and learning about how people public speak. You're actually public speaking in front of a room full of people. I took on the room classes. I practiced. Anytime there was an event where people could stand up and just ask questions in front of a few hundred people, I would volunteer to ask a question, right? I wouldn't even hear what the speaker was saying, talking about half the time, because I'd be in my own head, practicing in my head what I was going to say, Right? But you have to do it. You have to be willing. If I had waited to be ready to speak, you wouldn't be seeing this live right now. I don't even know what my life would be. It was my willingness to put myself out there, to look ridiculous, to stutter and stammer and sweat in front of people, to be nervous, to have more people come up to me and be like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. That was awful. You were so bad. Are you okay? That's the difference. You have to be willing. You don't have to be ready. And I hope this called you on some bullshit today, whatever it is that you've been waiting to be ready on, I want you to knock it out. I want you to stop using that as an excuse, because it's a bullshit excuse. Be willing. Be willing to get out there, Lee Markham, sometimes you just have to do it. Scared? Yeah, a hundred percent. Anyway, with that, thank you for joining. This is day seven of me going live every day in the month of July, September. Tonight, if you haven't registered yet, I am hosting a pop up training how to make $5,000 a month from a side hustle coaching business. Because I recommend if you're coaching, start as a side hustle first, save all the money you make and then you have an amazing cushion when you take a full time and you quit your job. Or if you just want to make build your business to 5,000. This is going to be a great resource for you. Anyway, if you want to register for that DM me, I'll send you a link to register. There's also an event on my page I've posted about a million times so you can just stalk me and it's there. Otherwise I cannot wait to be going live with you tomorrow. Tomorrow I have Tyler Cook and David Fryman who are going to be joining me for Biz Lab Live. And if you haven't seen that show yet, it's a lot of fun. We. Well, I have the jar. It's a mason jar full of business ideas. We do not know which business idea we are going to get but we pull one out of the jar and we design a business right in front of you. From the legal aspect, the marketing aspect and the strategy aspect. Sean, you just talk so much sense. Have a great afternoon. Thank you. Thank you Sean. I love it when I am told I make sense. Anyway, I hope you have an amazing Wednesday and I will talk to you all soon. Much love. Bye.