Katie McManus breaks down season 3 of White Lotus through Lachlan's impossible choice: do the deep inner work to impress his spiritual sister Piper, or take the performative shortcut his toxic brother Saxon models. Male influencer culture keeps pushing him toward the fake version.
I'm not going to talk about these two doing the thing, but we have to talk about this relationship dynamic with these three siblings. What Lachlan is going through in this season of White Lotus is the perfect commentary on what young men are facing down when it comes to their self identity and how they get to be in relationship with other people. We see very early on that Lachlan is desperate for the approval of either one of his older siblings. On one hand we have Piper, who is the quintessential feminine. The way for Lachlan to get approval from her is not only to spend time with her in a way that is just supportive of her being her true expression of herself, but it's also doing some very deep inner work. We see this in the scene where they're in the hammocks in the water, which, by the way, I want to be there. That sounds so relaxing, but you know, they're talking about meditating and praying and how like she feels this deep connection with a higher power and how he just does not. And, and she is visibly disappointed when she finds out that he doesn't feel that. And when he questions like, you know, if her experience of feeling that higher power is actually real or if it's just wishful, think so. For Lachlan to win her approval, what he's going to have to do is do a ton of non visible work, a lot of spiritual searching, and he's going to have to feel something and be able to report back. Now, that's not a guarantee, but it is so obvious that he so desperately wants that deeper connection with his sister and it's just something that he can't see a direct pathway to. And on the other hand, we have the quintessential masculine in Saxon and not a healthy masculine. This is very much toxic masculinity. It's very performative. And Lachlan really wants Saxon's approval as well. And Saxon has made it very clear how he can perform and get his approval. And it is by, you know what I'm saying, Saxon is ready with an itinerary of here's how you win my approval. Let's go to the pool, let's go pick up chicks, chug this protein drink that I've made that tastes disgusting. And Lachlan, like a lot of young men, is kind of forced to choose between having this deeper relationship with his sister or having this very performative relationship with his brother. And obviously for someone who is so desperate for the approval of either one of them, he's going to take the fastest path to success. And unfortunately, we've seen how that has kind of played out between him and his brother. And honestly, as a woman, we see this with men all the time. We tell them exactly how we want to be treated in relationship. We tell them about that deeper connection. And because, because they haven't experienced it, because they haven't been socialized in the same way that we have, it feels like it's too difficult to have an ask for them because they can't see the progression of how you go from point A to point B and being in relationship with you. And in contrast, there are a lot of male influencers who teach this toxic masculinity, who give them an itinerary. This is what you have to do to be seen as a man. And it seems like it's a much easier thing to do. And what's fascinating is that we see Lachlan, like basically do word for word, every single thing, and then some on the list of what Saxon tells him to do. And of course that has serious ramifications for their relationship. But then we see Lachlan turn to his sister Piper, go, go with her to the Buddhist monastery and say, oh, you know what? I'm just going to do exactly what you're doing, I'm going to copy you. And what's interesting about their dynamic is she's not wanting him to be exactly like her. What she's wanting him to be is a more in touch version of himself. And he just does not see that. And probably because of the family that they were raised in, he has no idea how to even start getting in touch with himself. And I love how Piper is depicting this experience of that feminine energy, because that feminine experience is wanting that deep connection with the men in her life, but it's also wanting the space to have her own experience. And we see that when she looks visibly disturbed that he wants to spend a year with her at the monastery, which, of course poor Lachlan thinks that saying this is going to win her approval and of course it just completely backfires. Anyway, tell me, what are your thoughts on this dynamic and these relationships?
