The KEY to Marketing yourself- BE yourself!

Hello, everyone. I'm Katie McManus, business strategist and leadership coach. I am very happy to be talking to you this Thursday. And I have to warn you, if you're watching, I am surrounded by oodles. That is not a cute saying. I'm literally surrounded by dogs right now. They are sleeping. However, if anyone comes to the door, they will erupt in barks and growls and jumping. So just be prepared. It may happen, it may not. Hopefully not. Also, I'm on Streamyard as I broadcast all of my lives through Streamyard. I'm going to the Facebooks, to LinkedIn and to YouTube. I love Streamyard because it allows for me to hit all these faces at once. Sometimes it's imperfect, though, sometimes it doesn't. Show me all the comments from all the different places. So if you comment and I don't call you out, because I do like these to be interactive. It is not you, it is just the technology. But anyway, that is all the housekeeping for today. I wanted to dive right into the topic of how to market yourself. This is one of the questions that is near and dear to my heart because so many of my clients struggle with this when they are getting started. And it's something that really holds them back in the success of their business. Because, newsflash, you cannot be a secret and success at the same time. If you are trying to start a business and trying to get clients and trying to make money doing the thing you love, people need to know about that. People need to know about it so they can enroll, so they can become your clients, that they can refer you so they can ask questions and get clearer on what it is that you do. If you're trying to start a business and you're not willing to put yourself out there, I would ask you very realistically if you actually want to start a business. Because if you're trying to do it secretly, it's not going to be effective. I mean, it may be effective, but it's going to take a real long time to get there. It's going to be a lot of groundwork for you. So here are some things that my clients get really stuck on when they are getting started. The first and foremost is they are so concerned with getting it right. Okay? Getting it right. And because they don't know how to get it right. Because we're humans, we love playing for points, we love winning, we love doing it and getting like a pat on the back. Even if it's likes and comments and all that stuff, it all counts. They don't know how to do it right. So they just don't do it at all. And what this costs you is no one will know what you're up to. No one will know what you up to, what you're up to. A post that's badly written that tells people what you're up to is better than no post at all, okay? So don't get held up by this voice in your head that tells you, oh, you don't know exactly how to do it right. There are a million people out there who can tell you how to do it right, okay? Just go out there and post something, let people know what you're up to. And for those of you who are in the personal development space, I'm talking to you coaches, some consultants, some fitness people. If you're in personal development, listen to this, okay? I need you to hear this because you're going to experience crickets, okay? When you post something that is from your coachy ass self, okay? And it's life coachy and it's kind of preachy and it's telling about this problems that people have and how to solve it. Newsflash, you are the self help section of the bookstore. Do you know how people go to the self help section of the bookstore? They have their sunglasses on, their hoods up, they have the ties pulled down so you can only see this much of their face. And then they're like looking for the book on how to save their marriage. They don't want anyone to see them there, okay? So if you're posting really coachy, life coachy, personal development stuff, just expect that you're gonna get crickets. It is normal, okay? So that's why you want to mix in other stuff as well. So you can get some engagement as well and you can get that boost to your ego, which is important. The next thing that stops them in their tracks and maybe stopping you in your tracks is compareitis, okay? If you're in a certain industry like coaching consulting, chances are you know other people who are doing similar work because you're in it. You're an expert now you're going to be looking at their social media and you're probably going to have this voice in your head that says, wow, they're doing that really well. They get a lot of engagement. They seem to be getting a lot of clients from it. Wow, they're really good. I can't be that good. Compareitis is the death of all things, okay? It is the death of joy, it is the death of progress. It Is the death of learning and getting better and surpassing others and surpassing what you think is possible for yourself. So if you're playing the comparitis game, you gotta fucking stop it. It's over now. Done. They are further along in their journey or they're doing a different journey than you. That is okay. They started where you are now and they put in the work. If they put in the work, you can put in the work. Okay? So stop comparing yourself to a million other people. It's not productive in any way, shape or form. Just get out there. Start speaking about what it is that you do, who you are. Hi, Rick. So agree. Compareitis. Great name. Yeah, Compareitis. I mean, we do it to ourselves at the beach with our bodies. We do it in school, with grades. We do it at work. You know, if we're in a meeting and someone else gets praise and we don't get praise, we just think, oh my God, like there's something wrong with me. No, no, absolutely not. We're all, we're all running our own race against ourselves. It's not a compare. It's not a competition by any means, okay? There. Whenever someone gets really freaked out that there are a million other people in their industry who are doing similar things to them, what I have them do is I have them take out your phone and actually if you're watching this and you take out your ph and it won't mess with watching this. Like, I don't want you to go away. I want you to continue listening. I want you to go and open up your maps and I want you to look up dentist and I want you to look in a 10 mile radius. How many dentists are there near you right now? And if you're in a really super rural area, like maybe broaden it a little bit. But the point is here is that there are. There's not like enough dentists for the population. Right? You can have multiple dentists in a small town and they're all going to have full practices. Not one of them can see everyone in that town. Okay? There's not one dentist who could serve all of Massachusetts. They just, they would die of exhaustion and starvation if they tried. Okay? There's no such thing as competition. There's only one, one you out there. There will be clients out there who resonate. Oh, there they go. I told you it's going to happen. We have a dog explosion happening. There is going to be. Rick Tamlin, There are about 500 dentists in your area. Yes. Granted, you know, you're in an area where it's fairly, you know, densely populated. But, yeah, they have full practices. Lily, shush. Sorry. The poodles and noodles. Oh, my gosh. Welcome to my life. This is what I deal with all day long. So anyway, there's only one you out there. I'm gonna close the door. You guys are gonna walk. This is the screened in porch and we're gonna evict the dogs. Lily, Lily, come in. Everyone inside. Come on. Inside, inside. Oh, my God. We're gonna close that. I don't know if you can see. They are mirrored. They're freaking out. Someone's at the door. I don't know. But anyway, this is our screened in porch. This is kind of where I hang out in the summer. Isn't this nice? But anyway, really? Sarah Matthews, puppy dog. Yeah. I'm glad some people can relate with the dogs. Rick Tamlin. Lots of older people with old teeth. You know, I didn't want to say it, but you said it, so thank you. Palm Springs, right? Lots of retirees. But anyway, back to the point. Compareitis doesn't serve you. There is only one you out there. There's no one else who can be you, just like you. And there are going to be clients who. Maybe there's someone else out there who offers the exact same thing you do. They have a different personality. The people that want to sign up with you are not going to sign up with them. And vice versa. You're not competing against them. Okay, so compareitis. Just shove telecomparitis. That voice in your head, just go shove it. It's not helpful. You're not playing that game anymore. The next thing that stops my clients in their tracks is they have this, what I call the profound bar. Okay? And it's not a place that you go for drinks. The Profound bar. Oh, Rick, the dogs. Hold on. The dogs are representing my own inner barking voices in my head who distract me. Yeah, I have them, too. I have them internally and externally. Oh, my go God. But the profound bar is not a place where you go for drinks. The profound bar is this. This feeling when you're about to write something for social media and you think, okay, whatever I'm gonna write has to change lives. It, like, it has to completely change how people see their own life. And it has to, like, set their life on a new direction. Oh, my God, that is so much pressure to put on yourself for a simple, like, what, 1300 character post? No, you're going to offer a context if it resonates with someone wonderful, and if it doesn't great. That's also wonderful. You're going to offer wisdom. You're going to offer a personal story. Sometimes it's going to hit the mark and sometimes it won't. And here's the thing. You may write something one day that gets a million likes and hundreds of comments and it blows up. And she's a crowd pleaser. And it's not going to give you one client, not one. It is just, it is a people pleasing post and those are beautiful. It broadens your network. It gives you a lot more engagement. Rick, we're talking about the Profound bar. And I like my gay bar better than the Profound bar. Yeah, I like a gay bar way better than a Profound bar too. Especially during Pride month. Happy pride, everyone, by the way. But anyway, but here's the thing. When you write something that sets the context that is slightly profound, doesn't necessarily have to change a life, but those are the ones that get very, very little engagement. And they're the ones where someone will message you and be like, oh my God, I so needed to hear that today. Thank you so much. I needed to hear that today. It hit home. Also, how do I work with you? Okay, so don't put so much pressure on yourself to change lives with one post. You're going to oscillate between chasing likes, doing those crowd pleasing posts that get a ton of engagement, and chasing leads, which means you're going to offer a bit of your soul, a bit of your wisdom in a post. Not expecting it to be huge, not setting that bar, that it has to explode or change lives. But often there's going to be one or two people who needed to hear that today. Okay, so maybe this is something that people need to hear today. I hope so. The next thing that people don't necessarily get stalked with, but they like have a lot of questions around. They're not really sure how to do it. They get stuck here. It gets sticky. Is they wonder, do I pitch every single time I post? Do I have a call to action every single time I post? And I say no, no. The point of social media, we're building this beautiful community, okay? We're inserting ourselves into this community. It's like a neighborhood, okay? Like, I want to bring in, like I want to start evoking Mr. Rogers, like, won't you be my neighbor? But I want you to everyone, just think about your neighborhood. And for those of you who live in apartment buildings and cities, if you know a neighbor, congratulations. You're. You're one in a million. But think about one neighbor in your neighborhood, and I want you to think of all the details you know about this person. You know, how much time do they spend in their yard? Do they care about their car? Are they outside, like, detailing it every weekend? Or is it kind of a piece of crap? Which I'm in the piece of crap kind of category there. Do they entertain a lot? Do you see a lot of people coming over, or are they kind of solitary? Do they like animals? Do they have bird feeders? You know, what style clothing do they wear? If you were to imagine what kind of beverage do they normally have in the morning or in the evening after work? I mean, this is all generally stuff that people know about their neighbors. And here's the thing about our neighbors is we may not even like them, but we generally trust them. Generally, there are some exceptions. There are some weirdos out there, but generally, like, someone may have different politics than us or different religion, but like, the end of the day, if we need a cup of sugar or if our electricity goes out and we need to go charge our phone for an hour, we're comfortable going to their door and saying, hey, do you mind? And here's the thing about building trust in relationships, Social media in your community is that you need to share enough of yourself so that people know about as much as your neighbors know about you, okay? They need to know some general facts about your life because they need to be able to picture who you are, and they need to be able to, like, say, oh, cool, I agree with that, or I disagree with that, but at least I know this person. I know more about them than just what they do for work, okay? And this can be completely benign stuff. This could be stuff that you think is just the most boring, like how you take your coffee in the morning. You could share, you know, your favorite kinds of shoes to wear on date night. You could share any. Anything under the sun. And you don't have to share anything that's super intimate about your life. But I want you to share the feeling. You know, if you really love gardening and you just get that satisfaction when you're out in the garden, you're weeding and you're pulling something out of the ground, and it's making it more of a clean slate for you to plant something that you really, really want to nurture and grow. Share that, share that. Such a lovely thing. And then it can be turned into a metaphor for the kind of work that you do. You know, if, you know, heaven forbid, you lose a grandparent or A parent, you know, sharing about the feeling of that loss, that's something that everyone can relate to rather than hear the details of them getting sick and deteriorating and all that stuff. We don't need the details. We need to connect the feeling. Okay. Because we can. I can read a post by someone who talks about the feeling of it, and I can so empathize and I can so feel aligned with you in that moment. Rick, I needed to hear this day. I'm so glad I'm off to another call. Thank you for this great wisdom. Oh, thanks for joining, Rick. I'm glad it was valuable. So don't pitch every time. It's weird. If you were to share about your personal life and then pitch like, that's ew growth. I feel like I've just been duped. Okay, so you want to share personally, you know, here's who I am. I'm your neighbor, you know, Mr. Rogers. Thank you very much. And also separate posts. Here's what I do and here's how I help. And if you're interested, you know, let's do that. When you blend them, there can be crossovers, but, you know, keep them separate. Both are valuable. Building trust and relationship is far more valuable than pitching everyone all the time. Another thing that people get stuck on is how personal is too personal. And it's exactly that example I use with, you know, losing a grandparent. You want to share about the feeling, you don't have to share about the details. Okay? People don't need all the details of a conversation. They need the feeling behind it. Okay? Don't, don't stress about, you know, people knowing everything about, about your life. They don't need to. And you don't need to share it, but share about the feeling of it. Share with the feeling of being stressed out in the morning when you wake up half hour late and everything falls behind. Okay? We've all been there. Believe me, I was there this morning. The other thing is, it's so easy. We all have this voice of doubt in our head. Unless you're a sociopath. If you don't have a voice of doubt in your head telling you, oh, you're screwing this up, you did that wrong. Don't do that. It's too risky. Then you're a sociopath. You need to make sure that other people are protected from you. But if you have that voice of doubt, congratulations, you're not a sociopath. And also, just know. And this is something that I say to my clients all the time, and I forget how valuable it is to remember this is that whenever you are tired, hungry, hurt or sick, that voice of doubt has an open window to come in and start directing your whole life. It is just going to come in and tell you everything you are doing wrong. So as you're putting yourself out there, just check in with yourself as a human sometimes and say, okay, have I slept enough? Have I eaten? Am I hurt or am I sick? Am I actually like hating on myself because things aren't going well? Or am I hating on myself because that's just what I'm set up to do right now? That voice of doubt can get you really down on yourself when you're posting and not hearing anything, which happens in the beginning. You know, we all have to start somewhere. And you know, you know I've been posting consistently to LinkedIn for over a year now. Today I started getting down on myself because in the first hour I only got like 2 comments and 2 likes on my post. Okay, that happens. It happens. People are busy, you know, sometimes the algorithm gets funny. Don't get all whacked out about it. Don't let that voice of doubt make meaning out of nothing. Okay, the last piece I want to leave you with is Sarah, Good sleep solves so many problems. Yes, it does. Yes it does. It solves so many problems and it actually sets you up for so much success. If you are not Sarah, I imagine you're getting good sleep, but anyone who's watching this, if you are not getting eight to nine hours of sleep a night, you need to start prioritizing that now. Oh my gosh, I'm just realizing how dry my lips are. Self conscious moment. But anyway, the last piece of advice that I want to leave you with is no matter what you're doing, there are people out there who are steps ahead of you that you can model. After that, you can ask for advice that you can get their help with. But here's what I want you to think about. Are they doing the same thing you want to do? It's very easy as a new coach or consultant who's trying to get one on one clients on a social media platform or through a social media platform to look to the influencers, you know, the influencers, the one that like are always posing with like the cool pictures of their awesome clothes and they have thousands upon thousands of followers and they have sponsorship deals and like they get paid to go to a restaurant and like noodles or whatever. Just keep in mind they do not get one on one clients. They don't. They get sponsorship deals, they get paid by companies. If you want to become an influencer and you want to get sponsorship deals and you want to be paid by companies, absolutely do what they say. But if you want one on one clients, that's not the person you need to be taking advice from because they don't know how to do that. They know a very specific social media model that works for their purposes. Now, what they do may help you get likes, but it won't necessarily help you get clients. This is one of the things that I help my clients get super clear on is who is their ideal client, what does that ideal client need to hear from you to be convinced that you're the person that they need to reach out to to overcome this challenge or problem they have in their life and how to instruct them to get in touch with you? Okay, Your social media strategy is going to be very catered to who you are because you are your ideal client. So how you show up is how they're going to be comfortable showing up. Okay? So you need to really get clear on who are the mentors and coaches out there in this space who can help you put together a proper strategy for getting clients or support the business model that you want to establish. If you want to become an influencer. I fully support that. But I'm not the coach that you want to hire for that. I'm the coach that you want to hire if you want to get one on one clients and you want to attract them through posting on LinkedIn or networking and things like that, or public speaking. Anyway, so the main takeaways I want you to have from here is stop playing the compare game. Don't, don't go to the profound bar. It is no fun. And it's just full of a lot of frustrated writers who are probably very drunk even though it's not an actual bar. I don't know. I've killed that joke. Anyway, don't worry about getting it right. Just be seen. You can't be a secret and a success the same time. Just be seen. And remember, build community, build a neighborhood. Allow for people to know you. They're going to opt into that. And honestly, if people know you fairly well before they start working with you, can I just tell you how much fun it is to work with them once they do become your client? Because you already have a lot of things in common, or at least a lot of points of interest in common. And it's so much fun to just dive into work and have jokes and just make it a joy instead of just plain old work. Anyway, I'm Katie McManus, business strategist and leadership coach. I hope this was useful for you. Thank you for braving through the oodle forest of poodles that we have here, and I hope you have a great Thursday. I hope to go live tomorrow, but this week has been a little nutty because I had so many people book my fundraiser for my birthday. Thank you. For those of you who did book. Oh, my God. A little overwhelmed, but it's just been amazing. And. Hi, Andy. Thank you so much. Oh, I'm so glad this has been useful. Okay. Awesome. Well, Again, I'm Katie McManus, business strategist and leadership coach. Happy Thursday, and I hope to see you all tomorrow. Have a great day.