Mindset Is Everything with Tom Short

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My man kd. What's up? I'm happy to be here and I can't wait to get started, dude.

So we're going to hop right into it. It's why people love this show. No fluff, no nonsense. We're going to go. Let's start right out the gate. Why is mindset so important?

Mindset. Like you said, My LinkedIn mindset is everything. It is the most underutilized tool that human beings have. But it can by far, and I've seen it and I've experienced it, it can make the biggest impact in your life. Hands down. The story. I like to use the quick example. You remember those snow globes back in the day, right? Those little snow globes and you shake it up and then like the snow goes everywhere. Mindset is when that thing's shaken. That's, that's 99% right. That's our mind that's going everywhere. Having a mindset is having that snow globe just sitting on the desk and that snow is just coming down and it's settled. You've got the clear vision. You can see through the snow globe. So that's how I envision mindset. Mental toughness is that snow globe when it's nothing. Or you can have the snow globe that's shaken up. It's your choice.

And so actually I'm glad you put it that way because that opens up a really good follow up question. Here is, okay, the difference between mindset, mental toughness and mindfulness. So when, so we're talking about mindset today. What does mindset mean to you?

Mindset is something that is developed and it is, it is. Look, at the end of the day, thoughts are everything. Everything you think determines your behaviors and your behaviors will determine your consequences. The easiest way I heard it explained to me was abc. So attitude and thoughts will drive your behaviors, which drive your consequences. Now on the flip side, consequences can be positive or negative. But when you realize what those consequences are and flip it back to the A, you can then change your future consequences because everything that happened in the past is not indicative of the future. And that's what's so powerful about mindset. You choose it.

I love it. So then let's dive into this here, right? What are some of the patterns you see in the greats that you've worked with and observed. Right. We were talking right before this started, everyone. And he was. He'll probably tell this story. Working with the Olympic basketball team in 2012. And he said you could tell the difference amongst the best.

Right.

We're talking about the best in the world. But there was something different about the best of the best. What patterns do you notice that the best have when it comes to mindset?

Yeah. So, I mean, there's three things that come to mind is the self confidence. Right. But what people don't understand is that confidence is not something that comes over time. Preparation is a direct correlation of your confidence. So it can be built up. You. You can build that up. The greats, they tap into a. Why it's that intrinsic motivation. Kd, It's. Yes, there is an aspect of. And I saw it in Kobe, he's got that mamba mentality. There's a reason why it was called that. Right. But it's deeper than that. They're always tapping into that. Why Kobe was never motivated by the money. He was driven to become the best he could become. And that's. It's a slight edge, but don't get it twisted. That is a big, big difference right there. And then they're always turning into failure. Failure is not for, for the greats, failure is not failure. Failure is an opportunity to learn. They turn into it and they know that the only way you're going to grow is by getting uncomfortable. They relish the failure. That's where. That's where you succeed. That's where you really make leaps. Whereas most people, they see failure like, I'm not even going to try. What's Katie going to think about me? That's just, it's, you know, they let all this outside world and then the last thing I'll say is they. They've got some sort of preparation or process around meditation. It looks and feels a lot of different things to others. But look, you don't rise to the occasion. You fall back on your preparation. I mean, that's. That's very evident with, with the greats. I don't care if it's a piano player, if it's a basketball player, if it's, you know, you name it, performer, you. You fall back on your training. Right? So in basketball, you get down to the last second shot. You're not going to like if you haven't prepared for that. I don't care if it's a sales call. I don't care if it is a performance at Madison Square Garden. If you don't have the habits and the routines built in, you're done. I don't care what your mindset is. If you're not there, you're done. You're done.

Man. We get. I could talk Kobe all day. I'm born and raised la. I was actually nicknamed Baby Kobe. Cause I look a little bit like him. I'm a girl dad like him. I remember exactly where I was when that helicopter. I was at Simsies. We were just talking about. I was at Simsies. Went like I will. That was crushing to me. And it was because of the way he thought. Now you said something that I love. A huge fan of this. I'm excited to hear what you give us here. Routines and habits.

Right?

You said the best have routines and they have habits around kind of meditation. But like other things they do to prepare. What were some of those routines that the greats have? What are the habits that you see them just all seem to embody?

Yeah, that's a great question. I think first and foremost, they're addicted to the process. Now what do I mean by that? You know, there's a great book by Bill Wash. The score takes care of itself. And you see the greats are so focused in the present that the outcome is the outcome. They're not even worried about that. Like they have goals that they set at the beginning of the year. And let me tell you what they do with those goals. Those goals go on a shelf and they don't look at them again. I can assure you, because it is. What are you doing right now in this day? And guess what? When today's over, there's one thing you don't get back. And I'm not telling you anything earth shattering. It's time. That's the great equalizer between men, women, children. Time. We all have the same amount. So what are you doing right now? So addicted to the process, number one. Number two, Deliberate practice.

Yes.

I mean, deliberate. People think practice. This is a big misconception. People think practice is just doing something over and over. I drive a car every day. I'm not getting any better at driving. You know what I'm saying? Like I. I got in a car today. That's not practice. But people. People associate. Oh, I'm doing this every day. That's not practice. Let me tell you a quick story about Kobe and being addicted to deliberate practice. Do you know one year when he was in high school, he went to a camp and he wanted to get better with his left hand. Do you know what he did at that camp. He only used his left hand. I mean, that's like five days of just left hand. I mean, at 14, 15 years old. That's deliberate practice. Practice for others is like, I'm gonna go to this camp, I'm gonna meet some people, I'm gonna get my shots up. No, it's. It's very deliberate. Right. And in the last thing I'll add, as far as the pattern, I see the fear. The thing that separates the elite. Fear is nothing more than an indication of what they need to turn into. Because we all get it. The elite get it. But the difference is the self awareness. KD that when they see that fear, whether it's self talk, whether it's whatever, that's the indicator that's where I need to go. That's what I need to turn into. So it's realizing what that fear means. And then I guess the last thing. Real quick, I'll add about routines. Routines are great, but don't let it become a rut. You know what I'm saying? Like sometimes you say like, I got this routine, I got this routine. But where the great see it and where they flip the mindset is routine is part of a process in the habits they develop. But they're not going to just stay there. It's always looking for that slight edge. What's one thing I can do to get an upper edge on my competition? And that's where your routine, you don't want to let it become a rut because that's a hiding spot, man.

We might talk for three hours. This is going to get ridiculous. Okay, so let's touch on. There's two things that I am a huge believer in there. One was practice, but also this mindset around fear. Because when I look at the top performing reps I have ever had on my team, they all had a very low sense of fear. It's like they weren't afraid of the. No. They weren't afraid of rejection. They weren't afraid to pick up the phone. They weren't afraid to maybe challenge the prospect. They weren't afraid of objections. And you know, we'll see what you have to say here. How can a normal person. Right. Because Kobe's not normal. Right. Jordan was not normal. He's ready. He's jumping on me. But how can a normal person develop. Call it an unnormal mind. You follow me here. Like, how can I develop that lack of fear? How can I make myself more confident to do these scary things?

Yeah. So let's Break it down to the very, like, let's just break it down of like what fear is, right? And I was gonna save this to the very end. It's like my, my parting piece and we can get back to it. When you realize that people don't care about you, that don't get this twisted. Listen, I want you guys to pick this up. When you realize that another human being does not care about you, like 30 seconds later, it will free your mind. Now, what do you mean people don't care about you? When you pick up the phone and whatever happens, it is what it is. That person doesn't give a rip about you in 10 seconds. So when you break it down on a very minute level, whether it's picking up the phone or look, I was in front of crowds of 10,000 people, like rejection was a thing. But in my mind, it was one call in a series of calls on the court. That's all it was. And when you look at it as just one action, right? And here I'm gonna say something and pick up on this. It's the mindset of I have to do something versus I get to do something. Here's the reality. You don't have to do anything, right? But you don't have to pick up the phone. I don't have to go out there and make the tough call. But when you switch that mindset, and this is what they all do, I get to, I get to train today. I get to read a book to up my knowledge. I get to. When you make that switch from I have to do something to I get to do something, and you realize that people really don't give anything about you at the end of the day, that frees your mind. It's not easy. I've had to work at it. We all have. But when you realize fear is. It's just a made up thing that that's where you're supposed to go. That's what you're supposed to turn into. So that's what I would say about it, about that.

So. But here I'm going to challenge you here because what people love with this show is right, is tactics, right? So this is a great example. Okay? You, you blow a call and you know you blew the call. Like you know it. And the 10,000 people watching know you blow it. How did you get over that rejection? Like, how do I develop the mindset of, you know, what the people like? Where did you practice? Is it meditation? Is it journaling? Is it like, how do you start to separate yourself from the mess up or the fear or the rejection. Like how.

So I had a process and I still do today. But there's four words that I want all of your listeners to take away. I don't care if it's something great that happens or if it's something bad. So what now what? So what now what? So you make, I make a bad call on the court, so what now what is one call in a, in a 40 minute game that it's just one call. If I make a great call, so what no, now what? It's just one call. So for me, during a game, because I knew it was always going to be there. And I got this from Evan Longoria. I use the shot clock, the left top corner of the shot clock as my mental reset. So if I got in a slump or something in my head and I'm starting to talk, I look up KD and I know that the left. I got two options. I got the shot clock on either side and I look at the left corner, bam, that's my switch. But also now this is the next level. Now we're getting a little into the physiological spectrum of the body, which I know you appreciate what stress is and I don't know how nerdy your listeners are, but I'm going to break it down to its simplest level. Stress is cortisol being released in your body. It's a hormone. Okay people. So when that hormone is released, it's a physiological, We've all felt it. Whether you get hung up on, whether someone says not interested, whatever, your heart beats faster, your palms are sweaty, you know you're starting, it's beating on your forehead. When you say out loud, best thing that could have happened, you shut that off right there, that cortisol, that drip is stopped. I would literally say that out loud during the game. And it changes your mindset too because you're like, this is the best thing that could have happened. And now you look at things, you have a different perspective. It changes everything. You're not in the woe is me, oh my gosh. Because how many times have we had something bad happen, whether it's on a call or whatever and that affects the rest of the day, you're like, oh, guess I'll send emails. Oh, let me go on LinkedIn for four hours. Or in a basketball game, right? We would do this with our partners because we, I've got two other guys I've got to, I've got to worry about over there. If I see that like kd, I see you kick a call. I'm getting over to you as quick as possible. Look, that's the best thing that could happen. Snap out of it. Let's go. Snap out of it. Let's go. And the. The last thing I'll leave you with right there, kd, that. That is a. Something tactical that you can use. Three officials on the court, right? We always look at it as a pie when we get in a funk or a slump. You know, as you were saying, stick your hand out if the play is farther than your hand, don't blow the whistle. Get back to basics. Get back to what you know, the fundamentals. So how can you use that in your game? Stick your hand out, all you have right in front of you, your computer and your phone. You don't have to worry about anything else. It's the next. It's the next thing. Move on. So what now what? Let's go.

Oh, boy. You're just dropping fire on him today. I wasn't. I don't know if I was ready. I don't know if I was ready. All right, I'm gonna pull you back here a second, though, because you said something I think is gold for salespeople, right? Because I want to keep bridging it back. You said this. You had a mindset reset or mental reset? I can't remember how you phrased it. Mental reset.

Mental reset.

So walk us through what that is and how a rep or how anyone can create that left side of the shot clock. Right? Like, what is that? Mental reset. And like, what are tools or triggers that reps can use? Right. They just got off a bad call. They just had a deal that they thought was gonna close, and it didn't. Right. They just got that email, said, sorry, we're gonna stay with our current vendor. How can they create that left side of the shot clock? Like, walk us through that. I think that's an amazing tip for people.

So I think removing yourself from the situation, if it's for 30 seconds, whatever, like a minute, just physically get up and walk away. If you've got a why, and that's a topic for another day. But whether it's a picture or whatever, you have to tap into your why. Go back to that, because that's why you're doing all this in the first place. So that'll allow you to get grounded. Right? You've got a computer screen that looks like a shot clock in my book. Top left corner. Whatever. I mean, whatever you want to develop for yourself something. I do, and I did. When I was watching film too, is I would just take a 3 by 5 card and write the date on it in the game or whatever. But you can use this, too, as your day. And at the end of the day, if something didn't go well or whatever, just write it on the card. Physically, this is. This is. This is the key point. Rip up the card. Throw the card away, because you are not. What happened on that call. Let me say that again. Write it down on a 3 by 5 card. Write the date. Write down whatever happened that you didn't. The outcome didn't. Again, we're not worried about outcomes. We're worried about the process. But whatever it was that was kind of foggy in your head, write it down. Physically rip it up. I would do that after I watch film. I would make all my notes, save them, but then I would physically rip it up because there's a physiological effect with your body that you are throwing it away and moving on to the next day. So I don't know if that helps, but those are a few things that you can do that will help you just mentally reset.

I love that tip. I love that tip. So now I got to bring it way back to something you said earlier. I'm taking notes over here, by the way. I'm already on my second page of notes, which is a new record for this show so far. You were prepped. He's got notes on top of notes to tell him through this.

I got 10 pages and my whiteboard over there. You saw the whiteboard?

Oh, God. I hope y' all are comfortable because we're not shutting down this show. Like, we're going to keep rocking. Now, you said deliberate practice earlier, right? You said deliberate practice, and this is something that has annoyed me with the sales industry since the day I got in, which is no one practices like they. And we're blessed to be in a position where we can. Like, I can't practice being a nurse. I gotta go to school for six years, and then once I'm in it, I can't practice. I can't practice being a lawyer. Right. Like, but sales, we can practice. I said this, I think @rainmaker three years ago, I said the best practice on purpose. The rest practice on prospects. Because if you're not practicing deliberately, you are. You're practicing with that prospect because that's the only time you're doing it Right. So let's talk practice for salespeople.

Right?

How can we bring deliberate practice into our sales day to day?

Yeah. Let me. Let me ask You a question real quick. And I mean, you probably know the answer if you took. If you took. And obviously Kobe and Michael are on the outliers, but if you had to guess from a percentage standpoint, if we took the minutes played in a game versus what they put into their craft, what would you. I mean, just ballpark.

Oh, so the minutes too.

I got a percentage between practice.

Yeah, dude, it's at least a 20x multiple. At least. Like, well, actually that'd be in hours to minutes. Like, it's funny, I asked my reps this the same question. I said, what was your high school sport? And they say, oh, basketball. I said, okay, how long's the basketball game? They go, 48 minutes. I say, okay, how many hours per week, per month did you practice for that 40, 48 minute game. And they always come back. There's at least two, three hours a day that I practiced for this 48 minute game. I was like, do you hear this ratio for your high school sport to get that fancy little letterman's jacket and maybe a medal? So when you walk down the hallway, the girls thought you were something special. You were willing to practice 15 to 20 hours a week for a one hour game minimum. Now this is where the next level, right? This was for high school. So then I have to assume the ratio at the top. I mean, they are, they're practicing and I guess throw it at all in the practice review, all that. They got to be practicing 25, 30 hours a week for that one hour game. And then this is year round. It doesn't even stop during the season.

Mm. I'm gonna ask you. I'm gonna answer your question, but I'm gonna. I'm gonna ask you three questions which. Which changed my perception on this. Okay. And they were. It was in a. I was, I was with a sports psychologist and we were talking about officiating. But we can turn it to sales. How much of sales performance scale of 1 0% to 100% is mental meaning confidence, composure and focus.

Man, I gotta put that. At least 75%. At least.

Okay. Of all the mistakes or errors in sales, what percentage of them are mental mistakes?

I mean, God, I almost feel like all of them. I'll throw that at 90%. I guess I don't even know what physical mistakes would happen in sales. So I'm a. I'm gonna throw that at 90%.

Here's the last one. That's gonna make some people uncomfortable. Of all the training and preparation, what percentage do you spend on mental training?

Getting those for my teams it's probably 25 to 30% and so it's obviously not high enough.

Yeah, there you go. And I don't like, I haven't been around long enough. I don't know why. Like, if you look at the top and I've talked to a bunch of them, every sports team now has minimum three or four, minimum three or four mental coaches on their staff, on their salary. Right? So we see and, and you look at the top performers and like, why in business is that an afterthought? That's, that's like, that's the mind boggling thing to me. Right? It's like, what, why is that just like, oh, just go make calls or just go, like just go figure it out. Like figure it out.

It's so funny, man. So before this whole Covid thing and like the company unfortunately having to retract a little bit, I was looking at getting a therapist and a hypnotherapist on the payroll. I was like, there are hypnotherapists. I'm a big believer in hypnotherapy. It changed my life. Right. And I think therapy in general, if done the right way, is a huge, huge lift for people. I was like, alright, I'm willing to pay an SDR 70k a year to go set X amount of meetings. If I had a full time on staff therapist or hypnotherapist to help people work through their blocks and through their challenges, do I believe I'd get the return of one SDR out of that? Absolutely. I mean, no hesitation. If every member of my sales org had access to something like that and was working through those blocks and working through those challenges and building up their confidence, would I get the return of one SDR out of that? I can't imagine. I don't. I think that is hopefully a shift we see in the industry. It's still something that I'm dedicated to making happen once all this lifts up.

Yep, for sure. I mean, I got so fired up, I don't even remember the question. It was about deliberate practice.

Me too. Oh yeah, I think.

Yeah, we were talking.

Yes, yes. Okay. So how can, how can or should a rep practice? Because you said it earlier. Right. Just doing is not practice. Right. So it's kind of like what is deliberate practice? And then how do you see that into the sales world? Because you're involved in the sales world too. Like all this time we've been talking about like, like he's in this stuff, like he's leading teams and building teams and coaching teams. Right. So what is deliberate practice? Like? Let's define it. And then how can a sales rep deliberately practice?

So in order to answer that question, I think the successful people I've seen have taken onus on themselves to say, I know this can help me. I'm going to put in the time, right? Like, I can't tell you how many people are going to answer the phone, but I can tell you how much time I'm going to put in because I control that and I don't have to practice at all. To your point, I can practice with, with prospects. It's not going to be good practice, but I can practice with them. I mean. So to answer your question, I start every single day with a mental priming. Okay, I've got it written out. I'll go through the four steps right now. This is something I was going to say later, but let's get into it right now. I. And I do it three, three ways. Katie. I've got it typed out. It's on my computer. I've recorded it into my phone so I can listen to it, and then I say it out loud. So I'm saying this three times. And this goes. This is part of the practice routine. So it's, number one, zero expectations. When I have a conversation, whether it's in person, on the phone, whatever, have zero expectations of anything to happen with that conversation. I don't expect it to go anywhere. And at the end of that conversation, nothing in my life changes because that's, that's facts. Like, nothing changes in my life when I end that conversation. Number two, it doesn't mean anything yet, right? Whether you say something like, oh, kd, man, we really need, we really need to increase, you know, our, our X. X, yeah, we need you like that. Okay, We've all heard that. That doesn't go anywhere. And then other times, like, I'm not interested, and you say, okay, yeah, I figured you weren't interested. That's why I called. And you, you ask a couple questions and, and those will become clients. So whatever they say, it doesn't mean anything yet. No regrets. And this kind of goes back to my fear thing. If I need to ask a question in that conversation, I'm going to ask it because I'm not going to hang up the phone or I'm not gonna go back in the locker room and think to myself, man, I should have done this, I should have done that. So no regrets. And then the last one. And I think a lot of people struggle with this. And what helped me with seeing Kobe in person and realizing he's five years older than me. Peer to peer. I don't care if it's your first day on the job or you founded a company. Every single time you have a conversation with somebody who could potentially benefit from your service, you look at them like you started the damn company. And sorry for the language, but it's peer to peer, right? It doesn't matter what. What they are. I don't care what title they have. You are in business because either A, you founded the company or B, someone founded the company and they thought there was some value, right? So when you are in a conversation, you adopt the mentality of the CEO. Because if I'm a CEO calling you Katie, as a CEO, do you think I'm putting you on a pedestal and vice versa? Hell no. It's going to be a conversation with two peers. Okay, Katie, this is what I'm seeing. What are you seeing? What's going on. But those four things help me prime. That's the first part of it, right? So I'm. I'm seeing it. I'm saying it out loud to myself, and I'm listening to it every single day.

Love it.

Non negotiable, non negotiable. And then you get into deliver practice. And it can be different depending on your industry. But what I did in officiating with games and calls, I would have a folder of correct calls and incorrect calls. It's pretty simple, right? So if you're having calls on the phone, you've got calls that go well and calls that don't. So you need to deliberately listen to both. You need to have a couple where you can go back and say, okay, this is. Here's A, B and C where I can improve on good ones. You need reinforcement that, like, yeah, I've got this. I can do this. Right? But it's. It's doing that. And then the last thing I'll say is whether it's the call map or whatever, I get into a headspace. Minimum of just five minutes can make all the difference whether it's box breathing. And I could go on, on and on about this, but how are you priming your brain to get that? If you go back to the beginning of this episode, I talked about the snow globe. You can't go into a conversation in person, on the phone, whatever, with all this stuff going all the way all around. You need to get grounded and get that mental clarity. Because that is what the greats do. They have clarity. Because when everything hits the fan, they're right here. They're not. That doesn't affect them. So you need to create that right here. So ideally, in a perfect world, that should be minimum 30 minutes a day. Minimum 30 minutes a day? Yes, minimum. And then maybe the other 30 minutes is your, you know, you're listening to a webinar or something where you know, you're getting tips and stuff. But if you're not practicing an hour a day, that's on you. I don't care who your damn boss is. That's on you. This is your life. Nobody's telling you you have to do anything. You get to get better. That's a privilege. Take advantage of it. But that's on you.

I love that. I love you. Brought that phrase back up. You get to practice, you get to cold call, you get to sell deals. You get to deal with challenging people like you get to right now. Something you said. I just wrote this note down because I want to try this out, maybe with my team. What would be a good call, like pre power hour or pre demo priming exercise? Like you mentioned box breathing. And that's in for hold four, out four, hold four. Or like something along those lines. What? Like if you were to recommend, like say, you know, I'm an, I'm an AE right before a big demo or I'm an SDR right before a call block, what would be a five minute priming exercise? Because this is gold. I've never heard anyone talk about that before and it's genius. What would be a good 5 minute priming exercise to do before a big demo or like a call block? What could that look like?

So I would I go back to. I'm sure you've probably read it. Obstacle the way. Have you read that?

I have. Ryan Holiday, big time fan.

Yes, sir. So that's part of my mental routine. I read this story about George Clooney. Do you remember the story about George Clooney in the book? I'll tell your readers real quick because it's that powerful. George Clooney and I read this three times a day. George Clooney when he started in Hollywood. Everyone sees George Clooney as he is now. No different than success. You see the end game, right? George Clooney, when he started in Hollywood, he wasn't getting roles, he wasn't getting any deals. And, and he thought, gosh, these directors, these, these producers, they don't like me, right? Like he was walking into these auditions trying to solve his problems. Do you know what Switched for George Clooney when he switched his perspective that the person he was about to go in front of had their own problems to solve. That director was hoping the next person that walks in the room is going to be the person that solves their problem, not his. And so I literally tell my I've got it up on my, on my wall. Three things. I get to start conversations. I don't have to make calls. I don't have to do anything. I get to start conversations. People. A conversation is a chance to solve their problem, not mine. Not any quota I have, not anything that, that my VP is coming up with. That is a chance to solve their problem, not mine. When you switch your perspective to this is a chance to solve their problem and it's not yours. And oh by the way, why don't we try be interested, not interesting. Everyone wants to talk about themselves. Be interested. Adopt a mentality that you're going to invest in their business. I bet you'd start asking some different questions if you were about to put your own money on the line and figure out how they do things relative to your product. So I read the George Clooney story, I put it in my words and when you switch your perspective and Katie, that can take five minutes. And if you did that every day, how could you not change? How could your mindset not not switch to Today is a chance to solve their problem, not mine. So I don't know if that helps but that's, that's like a quick five minute thing that, that you know, anyone can do. I mean that's not, you know, for the elite. I mean that, that right there, that priming of how getting your mind right, that can have all the difference in what you, how you perform.

I mean that's a huge difference and I can guarantee that 95% if not more of salespeople aren't doing any sort of priming exercise. I'm like I'll put this on recording right now. I am going to build some priming into my sales team starting next week and see like what can we do before a call block or before a demo or before a follow up to make sure we are in that. I've posted about that before. Like if you're nervous before a call, if because you're thinking about how you're going to look, if you're nervous, it's because you're worried about how you're going to look, how you're going to feel, how you're going to respond versus if you're thinking about the prospect and their problems. That nerve should go away because you're trying to help them. You're trying to help them with that problem. And those nerves can dissipate when you put them at the forefront and not yourself. Then with this, you mentioned a daily. What are some things people could do weekly to keep building this mindset? Cause I also, I do want people to understand what we're talking about. This doesn't happen overnight. Like, you don't just like, oh, well, kd, Tom told me to do this priming exercise and I did it. And I was still scared. So it doesn't work. Like, this is something you have to build and build regularly. Right. So we talked about some daily stuff. What are some things people could be doing weekly as well to build their mindsets?

Man, I go back to the things that I've noticed that make a difference. The morning meditations, right at the end of the day, a habit. And science backs this up. This isn't something like Tom and Katie are making up. Habits are not 21 days. So you can throw that out the window. It's not 21 days. It's anywhere from 66 to 255, 54, give or take. Thank you so much. Yeah, I'm done with this 21 day junk, so. And it sounds so simple, and I know people won't do it. Do you know how Jerry Seinfeld got so successful? Have you heard this story? You ever heard about his success?

Wrote a joke.

Every day, red X.

And then the street, the street goals. Every day.

Don't break the chain. Yes, don't break the chain. So when you do miss a date, that's okay. What are you going to do tomorrow to make sure that that doesn't happen? So to me, weekly, and I'm not trying to dodge the question, I'm so focused on one day at a time. And then by building up those days, that's when you start to see the weekly differences. The monthly, the quarter, the yearly. And it's not going to happen overnight. I found the silver bullet. There is no silver bullet. It's consistency. I don't care if you're trying to lose weight, if you're trying to, you know, make president, I don't care what it is. It's consistency, not falling in ruts, establishing your routine, whatever that might look like. But to me, Katie, all I can say is, like, it's a daily process. It's becoming addicted to that daily process. And you'll stack the days on top of each other to become weak. So I. I don't change anything for a week. Right. And look, Annie Dukes talks about this in her book, Thinking of Betsy, that last play of the super bowl, right, with the Patriots and the Seahawks. Just because the outcome of that, to your point earlier, like, somebody goes and tries this priming thing, and it doesn't work. If. If the Seahawks would have scored on that play, would that have changed the play? If the outcome would have been different, would that have changed the call? No, it's just, again, it's detaching from the outcome in owning that process, becoming addicted to that process of getting better.

I love that book, by the way. Thinking in Bets. Such a good book. It talks a lot about, like, poker and how life isn't linear. It's because we have variables, AKA other humans and things by chance. There is chance in life. There's chance in sales. There's chance in poker. There's chance in football.

Right.

And just because you made the call, that 74% of the time would have worked, but that 26%, it didn't. It was still the right call. And people change their behaviors based off that when they should have just stuck with what they were doing. So, no, great, great book. And actually, it's a good segue. What are some good resources for people? Right. What are some good books or programs or ways to, like, reinforce this? Because they hear this, they get fired up about it, but this journey never stops. Right? What are some good resources people could turn to to continue to build this type of mindset?

Yeah. And I think that's. That's the biggest thing, too. Right. Like, to me, motivation is something that pumps you up when you listen to this or for like, two or three hours or maybe two or three days, and then it fades away and you're like, okay, it's deeper than that. You got to get past the motivation. That's like that industry. It is what it is, but it's. It's much deeper than that. It's. So, to me, there's a couple things that helped me along. Along the way, but I'm gonna. I'm gonna direct you to one specific episode of a podcast. I like the podcast in general, but one specific episode. The podcast is called Chasing Excellence by Ben bergeron. He's a CrossFit coach. And I looked this up before our call because I knew I'd probably reference it. It's episode number 110, and it's like, establishing mental toughness and, you know, talking to the critic in your head, which, by the way, I mean, That's a whole nother thing about self talking and how you need to establish that. So that's a good resource. There's a lot of good courses out there. Mark Devine is a former Navy SEAL and he has a program that I invested in myself years ago called Unbeatable Mind. Highly recommended. He's got a book. He just came out with another one. I think it's like the Seven Fear. I'm going to jack it up. But Mark Devine has an unbeatable. An Unbeatable Mind course, which. And the thing I like about it, Katie, every month, like, you don't just get all. It was actually a two year course. You don't get all 24 episodes. You get one every month sent to you. So it's like you got to put in the time. Right here's the big thing too. It's not the cost. It's an investment in your future. You need to switch how you see this thing. Okay. Some books that we talked about that helped me along the way. Man's Search for Meaning. It's a little deep, I'm not gonna lie.

Victor Franklin.

There's one quote in. Yes, sir. There's one quote in there. Everything can be taken from the man. The last of the human freedoms. To choose one's way. Despite what's going on, despite the circumstances. I'll never. Like, on day three of this whole thing, I was like, I'm not even gonna say the word. I'm like, I'm gonna choose how I respond to this. Like, I'm. I'm over this. Like, let's go, like, on to the next. So, Man Search for Meaning, Breaking the Habit of becoming yourself by Dr. Joe Dispenza. That's. You're gonna. Everyone's gonna have a little self talk after that book because that's gonna make you uncomfortable. But that's where you become great when you get uncomfortable and you have to put the book down like I did a couple times and say, that's not me. That's how you know things are working. And then the book, we talked about the obstacle of the way, man, there's. There's so many books, but I would. I would direct you guys. Maybe that's a good starting point. And then Ben, Ben's podcast, Chasing Excellence too, is a good one.

I love it. And this is the type of stuff y', all, as you listen, this is what it takes. It doesn't stop. Right? I don't know that, you know, you pick up on patterns. There's been a Few times where he's mentioned, I read this every day. I've read this book multiple times. I do this every day. It's not a one and done. It's not. And this is actually why the motivation industry also continues to flourish, is because people seek motivation. They get it from this course, they get it from the event, then they lose it and they feel like they need to go get it again. Right. Like, you go to these, and I'm a big fan of some of these people. But the repeats, the amount of people that paid again, it's like, did you. Did you do the things that you learned at the last one yet? Like, did you actually implement it? You know, like. And that's what I hope everyone takes from this is, you know, I'm not a huge fan around motivation because I feel people get rah, rahed up when they don't do anything with it. I hope everyone listening takes what we're talking about and does something with it. Right. And so this leaves my last two questions here. And they're both. They're my favorite questions of all, all the episodes. The first one I called the big three. Right. So we've been talking about mindset for almost 50 minutes now, and you have been dropping bombs. Like, I have not taken this many notes in an episode yet. Like, this has been fun even for me personally. But say I forget everything except for three things. If I forget everything except for three things about mindset, what would you want me to remember? What are the big three?

Yep. So the first one I would say is change your self talk from have to to get to number one. You don't realize how many times you tell yourself throughout the day, both out loud and to yourself and to other people. I can't do that. I have to do this. I have. You don't have to do anything, so have to to get to number one. Number two, you don't rise to the occasion. You fall to your training. Right. So whatever you need to do to. To up that. And the third thing I'll say, and we didn't even talk about it, but I'm gonna. This is like some next level thing in my morning routine. Gratitude is a big part. I know you're a big believer in gratitude. If you want to switch your thinking, start being grateful for things that aren't in your life yet. I'm gonna say that again. Start being grateful for things that haven't materialized in your life yet. I didn't know if we would get to that, but I feel like that's Something I didn. I didn't want to leave out. But that's. We're all grateful for stuff that we already have. You want to start taking your mindset to different places and imagery and visualization. That's a whole nother episode. Start being grateful for things that haven't presented themselves yet. See what happens.

I love that.

Those are my three. I would leave. I would leave with you.

That brings me back, man. It brings me back because one of my first steps into, I think, serious self development was Tony Robbins. Like, he had this hour of power in the morning and it was this walk you go on with breathing exercises. And one of it was gratitude. And he took you through different gratitudes. Like, what are you grateful for now? And it's like, what are you going to be grateful for? Like, say it out loud. Say it with emotions. I'm so grateful I got that promotion. I'm so grateful that I like and oh, man, it's bringing me back. It's giving me actually goosebumps talking about it. So it's on. It's actually. Guys, you can go find it. It's on. Soundcloud is like Tony Robbins hour of power. And it's an exercise you can do every single morning that's guided. That encapsulates a lot of what Tom is talking about here. So, okay, that was a glorious big three. That was money. So now we get to the last one.

Right?

And a lot of this applies to this anyway, but the name of the podcast is Live Better Sell Better. Right? Like making sure we are focusing on the person and salesperson. And so much of what you've talked about today is about the person. Right. So what would be that parting piece of advice to live better. Right. Mindset, obviously is a big part of this, but what's that parting like, guys, if you're trying to get more out of life, if you're trying to live better, what would your advice be there?

Can I say two?

Absolutely.

Okay, so part of my. Part of my morning routine that I've developed and look, if you're trying to develop a morning routine or any of the things that Kati and I talked about, start small. Mine now is two hours. Don't try to go from waking up at 7am to 4:30, because you're going to do it one day, you're not going to do it, you're going to be frustrated. Just take baby steps. But I can tell you without a fact, kd, the number one thing that has helped me better than anything else, no phone until 7am and I get up at 5. I get up at 5 even before. Now I'm to the point, I don't even need an alarm. No phone until seven. So first two hours of every morning I do not look at the phone. Now, Tom, why is that such a big deal? Because if I'm letting something I see affect my mind, that's going to affect me throughout the day and I'll be damned if I'm not going to decide how my day starts and how I'm going to control that day. So I don't look at the phone. No email. Look, props to all the front care healthline workers out there. I'm not saving lives in anything I do. There's nothing that needs to be solved at 6:30am no LinkedIn post needs to be liked, no email needs to be responded to. I don't need to check any basketball score. I'm out of the officiating game. So I don't, I don't care about any of that. You decide how you start your day. Watch if that doesn't change the rest of your day. So that's number one and then number two, and I mentioned it earlier, people don't care about you. They care. But when you start to adopt and adapt that mentality that people don't really care about what you say or what you do, it's going to free your mind and it's going to release these emotional attachments we have as human beings because that's how our brains wired, right? So people don't care about you. Now, I'm not saying your friends and family, but people really don't care about you. And when you can think about that, that can free your mind and that can catapult you.

Who? And what a note to end on because y' all like it's all you know. I love his tagline mindset is everything. I talk about it with my team's mindset over everything. Finding ways to free your mind, develop your mind, create the mind that you want, to create the life that you want really is the secret sauce of everything we're going through. So, Tom, my man, 99.9% chance we're doing a follow up to this because I'm not done. We only got to half the questions we only got to have because the content was so good. So more than likely we're doing a follow up. But Tom, thank you so much for your time today, man. This was valuable. Just I got to say thank you, dude. Thanks for being on the show.

I appreciate it.

Hell, yeah, dude.