What's your LEGACY with Galem Girmay
17 May 2021 · 38 min
Podcast episode (Better Sell Better) hosted by Kevin "KD" Dorsey featuring guest Galem Girmay (co‑founder, RevGenius). After a sponsor read for Clary and brief host intro, the interview focuses on discovering and operationalizing personal core values using a tactical multi-step exercise (favorite people/characters, significant life moments, mapping honored vs. wished values, theme/circle/rank) and turning values into daily action via a "statement + action plan" ("Therefore I will..."). Galem describes building a personal "board of directors" for accountability and inspiration, reframes legacy as being known/present now rather than a distant memorial, shares self-care habits (meditation, exercise, blocked "my time"), and explains how these practices improve sales interactions. She concludes with the ACA takeaways: Align (values→goals/actions), Create (a personal board/tribe), Ask (evaluate if you're becoming the person you want to be known as). Contact: Galem on LinkedIn and socials; website/resources forthcoming.
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Kd, you literally have the best introductions, and I've listened to a lot of them on your podcast, and each time I'm like, damn, this is good. And this was also a really good one. So thank you for that very nice introduction.
Well, it's easy when it's true. That's what makes it like, every time I was like, oh, that was so nice. I was like, did I lie? Did I say anything in there that was not accurate? So it's sometimes fun to be able to hear it said back to you and just know that I have a lot of respect for you and what you do. Which is why I'm excited to dive into this topic here, which is, by the way, why people tend to like this show, is we don't do the fluff, we don't do the backstories that will tell me about your childhood. Like, we're going to get right into the topic, which is kind of this idea of legacy and values and things like that. And you texted me a while back this idea about personal core values, which is where I want to start today as we build up towards legacy. Like what? Like one, I guess. Why should people have personal core values? Because everyone always thinks like company core values, knowing everything's about their own. So kind of walk us through that. Like, what are they? Why should you have them? And kind of how do you go about building them?
Yeah. So glad that you mentioned the distinction between personal core values and the company core values. And so I want to start with the personal side of it. I believe that it's so important to understand what your core values are because it would lead us a compass for you throughout your life. And that doesn't mean that your core values or part of your values can't grow or change over time, because I believe they can. You know, like, one of my core values right now that I written down is not family, but family is something that I value a lot. Right. I. I do really value family. Something I want to have a part of my future. But for right now, at this point in my life, I have other of my top five core values, and family didn't end up being part of that. And I did like an entire exercise that I just developed myself to not being told, like, here are my values based on other people's ideas or projecting and saying, galen, this is the person I see you as Or Katie, this is the person I see you as. I believe your values are X, Y and Z. It's like, no, you need to dig into yourself, look at your history, look at your present time and look at where you want to be in the future. And that will guide you in a very like non emotional manner to what your core values are. That's at least my belief in when I did this. And I figured out like, here are my current five core values. And I'm not married to those five core values because I do believe they will change over time when we talk about our personal core values.
Interesting. So, okay, let's take then a step back. Could you define what core values are? Because the way that you're describing core values to me, I interpret it more like priorities. Right. So like there's priorities change. But I'm actually surprised to hear that values change. I feel like values are more of a belief. So maybe we have just different terms here. What, when you say core value, what does that mean?
Yeah, so what it means to me right now when I look at my core values is I look at it from multiple layers of. Okay, here are my five core values. So as an example, like love, independence, security, slash, safety. I kind of buck them into one, loyalty and curiosity. So if those are my top five values at this moment, then I attach that every day to what are my priorities and goals right now. So what I mean by that is I have a list every day where I write down here are my, let's say top five, six priorities for today, right? And then that's the very short term today goal. And then I have, you know, other type of short term, midterm, long term. When I look at what's happening today and the things I need to get accomplished, then my ideal outcome of the day is to have the priorities of the day of what needs to get done attached to one or more of my current core values. So when I look at my list, I see here are the things I need to do today in priority. How are these things on my list actually aligned with what my core values are? Because that's what's going to make me feel good if I know that the things that I've tasked myself to do or somebody's asking me to do, I need to take a step back and ask myself, is this something I would like to do and why and how will I accomplish that and what part of what I'm supposed to do is actually aligning with my core values.
Got you, got you. Okay, so then walk me through how were those your actual five? Those are the actual five that you set up. So how did you get to that? Right, like, how do you decide? Like, yep, that's going to be. And also maybe the flip of this is how did you decide what not to be there? Right? Because, like, you did. You mentioned, like, family for an example, maybe not being a value, but still a priority. So walk everyone through how. Okay, I say, yeah, Galen, this sounds great. I want my own core values, too. Now what? How do I go about the process to find ones that really mean something to me?
Yes, really good point. Because I was listening to so many different people at various, you know, podcast webinars, seeing posts online, and people talk about values a lot, and I'm like, that's great. I understand the importance of values right now. How do I really get to the core of that? Like, and I couldn't really figure it out. I had all these different places and different people talking about it, but I just wanted one place where I can start actually working on it instead of just believing I know what my core values are. I wanted to do it in a tactical way of truly figuring out what those are. So that's when I started to just create my own spreadsheet of this type of exercise, which obviously, like, I'll share with you, Katie, for your Patreon group. Everyone can get access to that. I'll put it on my own upcoming website so people can download it if they're not part of your Patreon. But I just want people to have access to it if they want to go through it. But the first thing I think as a disclaimer, because when I show this to my sister, she was like, oh, my goodness, there's a lot that goes into this. This is going to take some. This is some serious work. I said, yeah, it's important. And then when I walked her through the entire exercise, she went from going, oh, this is overwhelming. It's too much to this is actually really helpful. And I see why you're doing what you're doing. I understand this and you better now. So there's that, right? You have to be willing to go on that journey of self discovering what your values are. If you're just somebody who's like, I don't really care. It is what it is. If that's your, like, mentality around it, then, you know, don't bother doing any self work, you know, then you can just stop listening to the podcast right now, you know? But what it is, is I ask myself questions like, who are the favorite people or characters that I can think back about, either from my childhood or as a young adult or right now that I admire? And then I put that on one side of the list. And then the second part to that is, what about them? Is it that I admire? What about what I believe are their values that they've talked about that I aligned with? So that's the first part of the exercise of just knowing who are those people, their characteristics, their values. And then I had that. The next part, which is the more comprehensive part, was to write down some significant moments in my life up until that point. So it started with writing down a list of significant moments in my life. And then the next column is what was happening with that significant moment in my life. After that is which value was being honored with that significant moment in my life. And the last piece is what values do I wish that I honored with that significant moment in my life? So that's what I did. I started doing all of this on my whiteboard. And then I highlighted and circled around the things that kept coming up, you know, in. In what I just write out, I just kept circling them. And then I created a common theme section of. Based on all these little circles, which of these values came up as a theme? And then I just ranked them in order, and what came up were those five that I shared. So love, independence, security, slash safety, loyalty, and curiosity.
I love it. I love it. I'll share mine as well. So I have integrity, authenticity, effort, intention, and confidence. Those are my values. That's how I try and attempt to live day in and day out, which actually is kind of segue to. The next question is like, okay, so you've defined them. How do you make sure that you're living? Because as you well know, there are many a company out there that have their company core values written on the wall that don't live them for a second, right? And then they just become. No one believes that they don't mean they don't carry weight. Do you have yours right? How do you go about making sure that you are living them? Because if they're just written down, if they're just on a whiteboard, like, cool, but you got to live it.
How.
How do you ensure that you are.
Yes, that really, really good point, Katie. And the next part to. I'm very much a lover. One of my love languages are spreadsheets. So that's why I turned this from.
I don't remember that in the book, Gail. I've read that book a few Times I don't remember spreadsheets in there. I'm just throwing that out.
I just make up my own. So that's one of them spreadsheets. And so I went from doing it on the whiteboard to then saying, I need to make this something bigger and not just for myself. If this can be valuable to other people, I want to be able to share this. So in this exercise, there's the what we just talked about, like the finding your your five core top values exercise. Part one, part two to it is what you talked about, the statement and action plan around those values. So once you figure out here are my top five, well, the next thing you're going to do is understand why you value those top five each one by one. So if the first one is curiosity, well, why do you value curiosity? And then you write out, I value curiosity because da da da, da da. And you write that out. The next thing is therefore I will. So what will you do if that's one of your main core values? Here are the things I will do to honor that value. And then you can write it out in a sentence, which I think is nice as a reminder to yourself is write out in a sentence why you value that. And then the last step is which action will you take. So that's how I think about it. When I did this exercise was writing out, here are my top five core values. Going through the statement and action plan. The other four things that you work that out with. And then going back to my earlier point in the beginning of the conversation where I took it as granular as every day when I have a task of things to do, I need to make sure because this is the only way something that is tedious is going to make me feel better about taking the right step and doing the right next thing. So when I have written down like, oh, I need to update Salesforce, not so much fun for me always to do that. It's not something I'm like waking up, being excited about. I'd rather do something else. But I have to do it right from my job. So what part of my core values can I tie into that? And one part for me has become curiosity. Because if I can find myself being curious about doing something or maybe learning something new about Salesforce as an example while I'm there, then that's great and I've honored one of my values.
I mean, interesting enough as a VP of Sales, salesforce.com reports are one of my love languages. And so, you know, I like that you're able to attach one of your love languages and your values to something that is mine. So thank you for updating salesforce.com because most reps do not. And as a VP, that hurts my soul hurts muscle. So then, okay, so you defined your values. You have ways of living your values and reminding them. I really love the therefore I will do kind of add on to the end of it where you're defining what that looks like in real life. So now let's move to this idea of then this board of directors. Right? So you have your core values that a lot of companies have. You're bringing it to the personal level. Now let's talk about this idea of like personal board of directors. I love this idea. I first learned this and think and grow rich so many years ago when I first read it. This idea of like your own board of directors. Talk to the people about that. Like what is it? Why is it important? And very similar, like how do you go about building one?
Yeah, it's. And that's also a part of this where I just want needed to expand on it. And what a personal board of director means to me is just a way to hold myself accountable towards what I want to accomplish in life at this particular time. And again, I'm not married to the list of people and individuals on my personal board of director directors. Right? Like those are individuals right now that can add value to my life and hopefully there's something about me that I can add to their lives, you know, so I like it to be a two way street as much as possible. But then there are also there's somebody on my current personal board of director who I don't have a personal relationship with somebody you know, out there who I've never met, who's somebody I may never even meet. But that doesn't matter. It's the, the fact that I'm getting some value and I'm getting inspiration. I'm getting something that helps me move forward in my life from these individuals. And so I kind of like, I make it a fun thing with my personal board of directors. Like I have the individuals, I have a list of a few individuals that I have their titles. So I try to be a little bit creative with the titles I give people and then I also put what their main responsibility is because I like to think about it like I am my own business. You know, I'm Galen Girmai incorporated and in my business I have certain individuals that can help me get to the next level in this current state of life. And so Those individuals are there to help hold me accountable towards those goals.
I really, really like that. And like. Cause I have people on mind, Same idea or some of them. I know, like, I know personally, like, I hit them up, they hold me accountable. But also, you know, like, Kobe Bryant was on my board of directors, right? Like, this 4:00am mentality that he always had. Like, you know, I got the book behind me. Like, he was part of my board of directors. Like, what would Kobe think of me right now?
Yes.
What would Kobe think if I was, you know, slacking off or doing, you know, whatever? And I think having that board of accountability is so, so important and actually backing up here. So we're talking. You build a framework for core values, but the framework for this personal board of directors, like how, I guess how, like this wake up one day, like, oh, my God, I have a formula for this. Like, like, kind of where, like, how are you piecing this all together?
Yeah. I did not just wake up one random morning. I was like, this is what I need to do. It was step by step. So it was me just paying a lot of attention to people around me, whether I know them or not. People of a larger impact or influence in their profession. And some people are salespeople. Others are focused on diversity, equity, and inclusion. There's a mix of those individuals that I paid attention to for a long time, and I still do. And then they kept talking about value, something that came up. And then there were certain life events in my own life that made me really take a step back and say, hmm, I wonder what this means. I wonder why certain things worked out the way they did or didn't work out the way I intended them to. And I wonder if that may have anything to do with alignment or misalignment of values. And so I started to just pay closer attention to people talking about values. I started to pay close attention to watching people live their lives. And then I said, what can I do to make this easier for myself? And I like to be able to remove my emotions from certain exercises that I need to do, or coming up with some type of formula to make it easier. I just want it to be digestible, and you can break it up into multiple sections. You don't have to do everything all at once. So it really started with just that. That idea of, how can I make this something that I can learn from, something I can develop from, and something that I'm able to share with other people who might be coming onto the same journey that I'm on right now. And being very curious and not knowing, where do I even begin? Because it's overwhelming when you're not sure of where to start.
I totally agree. And that's why I love how tactical you're being in the Frameworks. Right. So it's not just like a fluffy conversation of getting your values. Like the process went through to not only establish them, but to determine why you needed them and especially then how to. To live them. I'm glad you had a strong answer there, because even I was there, I was like, I don't know, like, everyone talk about values, but does she have a way that she lives them? I think that's phenomenal. And so I think, okay, we've got values. We got the board of the directors at the Framework. Now start getting into legacy.
Right?
So, like, when you say legacy, I mean, you named your podcast, what is your legacy? Like, why does that word carry so much weight for you? Like, what does that mean to you?
Well, you know what? It doesn't actually carry that much weight anymore.
Okay.
Because I think it did in the beginning. The way I thought about it, the way I looked at it, the way I analyzed it, the way I came into the early conversations on the podcast. But then a few things shifted from conversations with other people. And just this idea of being so hyper focused around my values, I think really started with the podcast because I'm starting to pay much closer, closer attention to people's perspectives, to people's journeys, their thought processes, where there's alignment with a lot of different people who may or may not know each other or know certain things about each other. But I get to hear that. And it's made me not look at the word legacy as such a heavy word and put so much emphasis on that and more looking at it from the lighter side of it, of today, of life right now. It's happening right now, in this moment. So how can I make the best of that? Because what I know is from having losses in my life, from my dad passing away at an early age, my foster mom passing away a couple of years ago. Those are like life and death. And then there's also losses in your current life. Maybe you are no longer friends with somebody who you consider being your best friend. You know, that's another in life moment, loss that, you know, it has a different kind of weight to it. And it's about control there. I think it's about, what do I have control over and letting go of that. And so for me, like, legacy is about life right now, living in the now, in the present, because at the end of the day, I can do all the things I want to do and set out accomplishing to do. But I won't really know, you know, if I die next week, Katie, I won't know whether my legacy lives on or not. Maybe it will, maybe it won't, but that's not why I'm doing the things that I'm doing. You know, it is, I think, a selfish endeavor to think that, oh, my God, like, I'm going to leave this beautiful legacy. Like, what I've learned from the conversations is that it is a selfish endeavor that you have, if that's the mission, right, to leave a legacy. For me, it's more about living right now in the experience of what I get to. To be part of. And who knows what that's going to be in the future.
That's so good. So it's not where I thought you were going to go with it, which is amazing because it's my personal belief on legacy as well, that I don't think a lot of people share. It used to bother me a lot, right? Like, how will I be remembered? How will I be remembered? How will I be remembered? And actually, I remember this moment. I was in San Francisco and it was the first time seeing the Golden Gate Bridge, right? It's the first time I've seen the Golden Gate Bridge. And I'm standing by the plaque, and on that plaque there's names, right, of the people that built and designed the Golden Gate Bridge. And I'm standing there going, these individuals built something that's like a seventh wonder of the world at the time that's going to last hundreds of years, and no one remembers them. Nobody. And it hit me in that moment of like, why am I so worried about being remembered when I don't want to be remembered? I want to be known. And this is where you use the word present. It's not what am I remembered for, it's what am I known for right now and living it now, right? It's not. I don't want to be remembered. I want to be known in the moment of, like, this is who I am to you right now, or to my wife or to my daughters. And I want to be known while I'm here. After I'm gone, they can forget all about me. That's fine. I want them to go and live their lives. And so I think that's a really, really cool way that you pulled that together. I wasn't sure that's where you were going to take it. And that's awesome. So I agree. Legacy can carry way more weight and it puts us out in the future instead of the now living. So. Okay, but I still got to ask you, what is your legacy? So now you've defined it, what is this legacy that, like, how do you want to be known in the moment and live?
Yeah, I just want to be known as being helpful to as many people as I possibly can without. This is the disclaimer. Without sacrificing myself in the process. I think that's important because I think it's. It's noble and it's beautiful to say I want to be as helpful and leave the most positive impact on as many people as possible during this lifetime. Right now, in the present moment. Yes, I think a lot of people want to do that, and I do, too, but not for the sake of. Of hurting or harming myself in the process. I still want to live my best life right now as I have the opportunity to it. And that means, and this is something I've learned is I actually need to step away being able to say no to certain things so I can spend more time on myself. And because we're in this place of just giving, giving, giving so much of ourselves to other people, that if you do a lot of that and if you are, like what somebody said in my podcast, like a recovering people pleaser, Megan Bowen said that, and I resonated with it, is that when you have that kind of characteristic within you, then it's so natural to just keep giving and giving and giving and trying to be as helpful as possible. And while you do that, you're losing track of your own life and you're losing track of the present moment. And that's not something I want to do now.
I love that because it's true. Like, we give ourselves, you know, like, it's actually Jay Z that said, right? I can't help the poor if I'm one of them. And it's not just about money there. Like, if you're trying to lift people up, you can't lift people up if you're below them, Right? Like, if you aren't strong enough because you aren't taking care of yourself, you can't lift, you can't teach, you can't coach. And that self care, I think, is really, really important. So actually, let's transition into that, right? So, like, what are some of the things you do to take care of you, to level yourself up, then you can then take better care of other people.
Yeah, I Don't have balance. It's something I don't, I just don't believe in it. I, it's just not my personality trait to have balance. I think I've tried because people told me that I need to have more balance in my life, but I just naturally do not have it. So literally it goes up and down. There can be certain days, certain weeks, certain months where I just go 100 all the time. And that's it. That's what I, what I choose to do. That's what I want to do. Then there are other times where I'm just like chilling. I'm doing nothing purposely. And recently in the past few months, I've been on the ladder, I've been blocking off my calendar to just have what I call my time. I block off my calendar for a couple of hours every week and I just call it my time. Nobody can book anything for anything with me during that time unless I decide to do it. And those are all after, you know, business hours, after work hours. Because there was a time where I would give so much of myself to the community. You know, being a co founder of Genius and kicking that off with Jared, we put so much work in to doing that. And you keep giving so much of yourself to other people. You keep creating. And Katie, I know you understand this because you have your own community on Patreon and it, it takes a lot of work, it takes a lot of effort, a lot of energy. And I at some point started to get drained from it and I needed to just take some time to myself and for myself. And so I think that's super critical to understand that when it comes to self care. And it's not that my way of taking care of myself is the same way that you do it or you choose to do it. Right. We have different lifestyles. You have a family. I don't. So my self care times will look different than yours. Right? So for me, it's about being able to sit down and read a book or the. I guess one balance I do have and try to stay consistent with is meditation. You know, I try to spend 25 to 30 minutes every day or every other day doing that at least. And then, you know, reading a little bit every day if I, if I choose to make the time for it. Listening to podcasts. I enjoy doing that. Going out for walks. I exercise now every day. I started doing insanity. The, the workout program. Yes, it's intense. This is the third time in my life I'm doing it, but I love it. I Love challenges like that. So I have these things that I'm doing, you know, every day or every other day, depending on the activity. But yeah, that's like my self care taking bath and just like calling a friend or jumping on a zoom with someone I haven't caught up with in a long time. That for me is self care because that's my time with somebody that I love.
I love it. We got there eventually. I feel like we got some more to unpack there because it's interesting. The question was self care and it immediately went to balance first. I'm not balanced. Self care and balance, it doesn't have to be balanced. I actually think that's where people get it twisted. They think life and work is this balancing act where they have to be even. That's not how it works generally. And it's not even how it has to be. So we got something unpacked there. On why that was where it went first is I'm not balanced. I don't think I have to. That's fine. That's fine. We weren't talking about that. We were talking about the meditation and the exercise and the reading and the bath. Like the things that you do to take care of yourself. Because I mean really, that's the whole premise of this podcast, right? The name of the podcast is Live Better Sell Better. Right. I have this weird idea that if we took better care of ourselves, if everyone had core values that they lived out, if they thought about being present in their legacy in the moment, they had a board of directors, they did that. The sales take care of themselves as well. And so as we wrap here, I've got two last questions for you. So like the first one is like, so how does this tie into your world as a salesperson? Right? So okay, you got the values, you've got this board of directors. Like how in this idea of legacy, how do you feel that carries over into then your day to day work in the sales world?
Yeah, it makes me think about how are my prospects, how are their experiences with me when we have a conversation, whether that's a cold call conversation, it's a discovery call, it's a demo, it's a pricing conversation, Whatever the case might be, you are leaving an experience with those individuals day to day, every day in those conversations. And recently this was like shown to me in a conversation. I was having a meeting with someone, one of my prospects about pricing and we're supposed to have a 15 minute conversation and we probably spent the first five minutes actually talking about pricing. And the rest of the time together, he saw the sign behind me, says, what is your legacy? And he started asking about it, and that's where he wanted the conversation to go. So that's where we took the conversation. No more talk about pricing. Because. And when we did talk about pricing, you know, we had a lot of back and forths in that. And eventually I said, listen, I just want this to be a mutual win win. I want you to feel good at the end of this interaction with me, at the end of all interactions that we have. I don't want you to feel like I am winning you over or that you are forced to go in a certain direction. I want us to be good and feel good about this decision to work together, because that's what this is about. I want the experience that you have with me, the experience that you have with the company, to be a good one, and I want you to feel good. So tell me honestly, how are you feeling after this conversation? And he was like, I really appreciate having conversation with you. I appreciate we're going talking about the pricing. I'm fine with what you proposed. Let's move on. You know, wasn't a big deal. But just being. Being able to. To your point earlier about one of your values is being authentic, being able to bring that to the conversation and then taking it to the next level and picking up on some of the. The clues, like he left little breadcrumbs for me to. To either continue the conversation in the direction that he desired to go or go back to my agenda because it's something I'm supposed to be doing.
I love that. And that's you also living one of your values. Curiosity, right?
Yes.
If you stay curious, you're a better listener. Curious people look for bread crumbs. They don't trip over them, they're looking for them. So I love that. That analogy there. So perfect. And then the last question here. Right. Like, you know, we covered a lot.
Yeah.
If you think about the three main takeaways. Right. Like, people remember the beginning, they kind of remember the middle, and they remember the end. And so if you think about what were the three main takeaways you'd want people to take away from this conversation, what would they be?
Yeah, I thought about this earlier, and I'm not somebody, although I love the whole framework and the formulas, But I came up with something that I now am calling aca. So three super easy things. The A is for aligning. So align your core values with your goals and actions. That's the first thing I would love for people to walk away with Align. Second is create. So create your own personal board of directors or a tribe, whatever you want to call it, for some inspiration, guidance, mentorship, to get yourself energy and to be accountable towards your goals. And then the A is for ask. So ask yourself, am I actively working on becoming the person that I want to be remembered for or that I want to be known for Today, when I am no longer here or when I am no longer in the room with other individuals, how do you want people to think about you? What is your reputation? So ask yourself that. Those are the three main things for me.
I love it and my team knows I love a good little acronym, an ACA up in here to bring it home. Align, Create, Ask Galen. Where. Where can people get more of you? Where can they get more of kind of like the content that you're putting out here? You mentioned like a website, like a framework, like where can they get more of you?
Yes, I'm getting all my ducks in a row. That's why I mentioned the website, which is where I would like to host a lot of this for people to just have one place to go to. But in addition to. Obviously people can find me on LinkedIn, Gail and Germai. I'm on all socials like Twitter, Instagram. Yeah, that. That's where I'm at. So people can find me there. All my contact Info is on LinkedIn. If you want to email me, if you want to text me, you know, I'm on Clubhouse as well. I do a weekly session every Tuesday at 5pm eastern, 10pm for me here in London with, with my club. What is your legacy on Clubhouse?
I love it. I don't know how you manage all those social channels. I have1like LinkedIn is like my only one that I ever use. I have Facebook, but I never, ever use it so.
Well.
Galem, I appreciate you. I respect you. This was an amazing, amazing conversation. I just gotta say thank you for your insights, for your energy, for your inspiration and can't wait to talk again soon.
Thank you, Katie. Thank you for having me on.
Oh yeah.
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