A satirical guide to staying mediocre as an athlete: let your parents do everything, skip strength training, and ignore sleep and nutrition. The exaggerated advice flips to show what actually matters for athletic success.
Here are 3 steps to being an average athlete. Step number 1, make your parents do everything for you. Packing your lunch, reminding you in practices, pushing you to be motivated to go work out. The very best athletes don't always need their parents doing everything for them. So if you wanna be average, ask your mommy to wake you up every morning. Step number 2 is only do skill work. Neglect speed work, neglect strength work. That is a surefire way to ensure that you're not gonna be the best athlete out there, 'cause the ones who are doing strength and speed work are going to be far ahead of you. And then step number 3 is, Don't do the boring stuff that no one else wants to do. The sleep, the nutrition, the hydration, all of those things are kind of just lame and overlooked. Don't do those because only the best, most elite athletes are the ones focusing in on that stuff because they know the gains that those bring. Follow those 3 steps and I guarantee you're gonna be average.
