Q&A - Goal Achievement

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Hello, this is Wendy Guerrero, one of the coaches here at Learning Strategies and Mind Tracks. And today I wanted to address the concept of goal achievement. I wanted to start with a couple of brief thoughts and tie those together and then move on to why people have challenges with achieving their goals. One of the definitions I like of a goal is a goal is a dream with a deadline and an action plan. And so that's really important because a lot of people have goals, but they don't. They don't do anything to move it out into the world. It's sort of, it's in their head, but it's not out there. And the, another, the other concept I like to share is this was in the Optimist Daily last week. Not to have dreams is to be like a bird without feathers. It's like you can't, you can't fly, you can't. You, you don't. You don't take it into the air. You don't put it out there because you need to be able to fly it into the world. And so those two concepts, I think are a really great summary of how to achieve goals and, and what will move you forward. One of the things I became aware of very early in my coaching career here at Learning Strategies and even probably before that was that. But it was so in my face when I first started doing the coaching here is that it's very important that you have a well formed goal. If your goal doesn't comply guidelines, it's more challenging to achieve it. It's more challenging to move it forward. So I wanted to address the things I see most frequently when somebody is not moving forward in the direction they would like to. One is that.

You need to focus on what you want more of. I was astonished how many people are totally aware of what they don't want and very confused about what they do want. So it's really important that you address what you want to see come to fruition. Not what you don't want, but what you do. Other thing that became real evident to me very early and the more frustrating things to deal with is people are stuck in their story. They repeat their victim story. They repeat all the crummy things that happen. They repeat all the travesties in their life. And it's like a badge of honor. They're not willing to relinquish it. They're not willing to give it up. And there were several times when I would have loved to have leaned into the phone and grabbed them by the shoulder and said, who are you? Without that story, you are always, always, always more than that story. And you're limiting yourself by getting stuck. Now, one of the things I've come to understand about that is that when somebody is repeating something over and over and over, they often haven't pulled the wisdom, they haven't pulled the learning, they haven't pulled the growth opportunity from that story. Once they do that, then they can let the debris go and carry forward the learning, the growth. And that in and of itself is sort of a safety mechanism in a way that whatever you go through, the challenges you go through, the crummy times and some of the really crappy stuff that happens, they're all opportunities to grow. And I believe truly that saying that life doesn't happen to you, it happens for you. There's always an opportunity in every challenge. Another thing I see a lot of is people say I'm going to. I will have needs to be present moment. The goal should be stated in a way as if it's already here. I am, I now. I choose I now have here I am. Am I give thanks for. You want it to really be here now? Because if it's out there, you know I'm going to be doing this. Well, when are you going to be doing that? You know, you're leaving it out there in the future. You want it here now. And just the fact that you're stating it as a present tense occurrence means that your other than conscious goes, oh, she thinks it's here. Better get busy. So there's a real power in that. Bring it into present moment. I have here I am, I am so grateful for. And bring it here now.

Another concept that I got from Jack Canfield is don't visualize what it will be like. Like again, this is future oriented. Visualize what it is like it's here now. What is it like? Another thing that I see a lot of are very, very academic goals. They could be anybody walking down the street. It's this date and I have this much money in the bank. Well, great. So does Joe Blow, so does Mary Hill. You know, anybody could have that. You need to connect with it. You need to connect with the feeling that that gives you. It's not that you want that physical thing, it's you want the consciousness that allows that to be there. As Jack Canfield again says, it's not the stuff we want it, it's the feeling. It's the way it makes us be. And I think that's why academic goals so seldom come to fruition. We're not connected with them. They're just.

An inert, detached statement of what you want. But you're not connected, you're not aligned with it. You're not invested in.

Isn'T part and parcel of who you are. So it remains very outside of you. Another guideline for a well formed goal, it's within your control. A lot of people have goals that are oriented around other people and they want them to change. Now that being said, often people do change when you change, when you change your perception, your way of operating the way you see the world, often other people step forward to meet you. It's an interesting phenomenon because I've had some total, seen some total transformations in various types of relationship employment. You know, employee, employer, husband, wife. All kinds of relationships have shifted. When one person shifts the paradigm they're operating from, it's like everything's linked to everything else. And so when you change your behavior, often you will impact someone else's. But you don't want to build a goal around something else. Somebody else changing the way they handle the world because that's, that is, it's going to be, it's going to be very, very frustrating.

Another thing that we, you need to be aware of is that the goal is very aligned with what you value. Often I will get a sense that there's, there's a misalignment. It's like somebody is not totally committed to something because it really isn't theirs to do. That's one of the reasons that I really like the self discipline goal. When somebody's feeling stuck and they're not.

They'Re not able to follow through in an effective way. I've had several people have incredibly profound realizations of something they have believed since childhood. There's something in the change work and self discipline that helps you to recognize when somebody else told you something you could or could not do. You'll never be any good at that or you would be great at this. And so you've got this.

Perception that is filtering your world, but it didn't even come from you. I've had people that, that were training to, to go into the profession they didn't care about when what they wanted was something else totally different. So the self discipline parallel is really good at ferret ferreting that out. Another one more thing I'd like to mention is the, the present positives. Sometimes people have a new goal and they are afraid that they're going to leave their current presidents. Your present positives behind when they achieve the new paradigm is sort Of a push me pull you. Because if I step into this, then I may be leaving this. But if I stay here, I keep this, but I don't have that. You want to preserve the present positives. And so one of the really good parallel for this is new history generator. That is the one where you have the four paths. The past as it was, the past as you would like it to have been, the past with unexpected events. The fourth path, you create yourself. So you can include the future you want, you can include the past that was the beneficial aspects of life, the growth you've been through, but you integrate them. And so you're moving forward with all your resources still in place, but you're stepping into the new concept of how you want to be living your life. That again, is the people who are stuck in their story and their victimhood or where that's their badge of honor. They can carry that learning and that growth with them, but they don't need to stay stuck in the story itself and remain in the reactive victim mode. So those are the basics of what I see when somebody is not achieving the goals they want. I would like to just briefly allude to the action steps. One of the things that I noticed when the secret came out was I had several people who were convinced that if they. There was one guy wanted a Ferrari, he was convinced that if he could imagine the red Ferrari in his driveway, it was going to show up. And he was frustrated that it wasn't there. The piece that's missing there is. The universe rewards action. You need to step into action. You need to get motivated. You need to really move toward what you want to achieve. And then the universe steps forward to meet you. There's a really good series of newsletters that are done by Mike Dooley. It was called Tut Letters from the Universe. And one of the statements in one of them that I've always remembered is it's not the size of your dreams that determines whether or not they come true, but the size of the actions you take that imply their inevitable arrival. And just so you know, the bigger the dream, the bigger the action. And I just thought that was such a wonderful, wonderful way to put that. And just so you know, the bigger the dream, the bigger the action step you're going to need to take. So that's a few thoughts. We. We did have a lot of questions. This time I'm going to merge a few of them together. Several of them were very pertinent to what I've already spoken about. So you may find the answer in this preliminary portion, but I will start at the bottom and work up. I listen and do all the work that you suggest but nothing improves for me. I would take a good look at the values alignment we just spoke about. Again, the self discipline might be helpful. Take a look at your beliefs because often we have a core belief that's sort of down underneath all the superficial stuff on top and we don't recognize that. We haven't processed that. So when you do, when you One thing I like to tell people to do that's very pragmatic on this topic is when you think of your your outcome achieved, what comes up? Why are you not there? Why are you not already there? Because that will tell you the belief systems that are in place and that might be keeping you stuck. I need to make a few short educational videos for my coaching group and have a huge resistance. Any advice on how to do how to make myself do what is very important to us really?

One things I would do, and I mentioned this last time, is tuning into why you're doing something. The umbrella goal that I mentioned with the Life Purpose exercise from Jack Canfield. If you know why you're doing something and if you're into coaching, there's probably some altruistic components there. If you're fulfilling that, you are going to. You're going to feel really good about yourself once you get it started. You just got to get past the entropy. So I would probably.

Take a look at your history with this. Is there. Is there some time that you stepped into action and it didn't go the way you wanted? Then it might be new history generator. Are you doubting your capacity to do the coaching? Then you might do the self esteem supercharger. Are you doubting your capacities to verbalize and communicate? Then talking to Wynn might be good. So see what's coming up on why why there's the trepidation about doing this because that might give you the piece the pieces you need. And if you need some further assistance with this, don't forget the coachindtrax.com email because I'd be happy to share what other people have found helpful based on what you find when you explore what I've just suggested.

Question from Jaylene When I make a high level goal, I'm almost guaranteed not to achieve it. Any advice? I would chunk that down. Sometimes people have a grandiose goal and it's so huge that they can't even wrap their head or their heart around conceiving it. Having it come to fruition so if you can chunk it down into action steps. A year from now I want to be here. Six months from now I want to be here. Three months from now I want to be here. So you sort of chunk it down into, into. The quantities are smaller, it's more manageable and it's more believable because sometimes it's too big a leap. The gap, the gap is seen as just being this huge chasm and you're, you're even willing to take the first little jump because you feel like you're going to fall into the, into the, into the ditch there. So I would chunk it down. I would use belief and finding treasure to see what's going on behind you there because there may be some, some lack of conviction that either you have the ability, you deserve it, you know, whatever it is, but belief and finding treasure are both workhorses because they. You think you can and you think you can't, you are going to be right. So belief in finding treasure would both help you with that. You deserve it is really good because if there's a lack of deservability or worthiness, a sense of lack of worthiness, then you deserve it will help you deal with that. So again, why are you not there? You know, why, why do you shoot yourself in the foot? Why are you guaranteed, quote unquote, not to get it? You know, let's change that to a possibility. Not a, not a lack of ability, but just the possibility is there. But why are you not doing it? Because you have the potential. If you're, if you can dream it, you can do it. So I have faith in that, a lot of faith because I've seen a lot of experience, I've had a lot of experiences with that. So trust the process and explore it.

This one really intrigues me. I have read that listening to tones that induce a gamma state helped to reverse the neuron damage associated with dementia and Alzheimer's memory loss. I do not know Nancy, but I would love to get the source for that. If you could email that to coachmindtrax.com I work part time at a senior center where I'm helping assisted living people and I've able to help with the coaching tools I have and just with, you know, I'm very heart based and they, they need somebody in their corner. But I would love to know more about that and I will run it by Paul too, Paul Shealy and see what I can find out. That's something that's very dear to my heart. So if you could send that to me, whatever the study is, so I can look it over, it makes sense to me that there would be some possibility there, but I do not know. But I would like to pursue it and get further information. Can I listen without headphones and still have results? Absolutely. All the tracks are laid in both ears. It's just that one is geared for the, you know, the opposite hemisphere. And that cross work can be very effective. However, we've had people with profound hearing loss in one ear get great benefit. So, yes, you can absolutely benefit even if you don't use headphones. We've also had people put their heads between speakers or put the speaker behind their head. So it's sort of coming if it's one speaker. And so you can have it behind your head and still benefit. So, yes, definitely. Do the parallels work if the mother tongue is not English, and this apparently has been submitted before, and I apologize, Christiane, because I go through every time and I, I, I update right before I log on to do this call. So I apologize, but absolutely you can benefit. I think it's best if there's a rudimentary understanding of English, but I've had people with, with very little English benefit. But what, what I would recommend is whatever parallel you're using, build into your intention before you listen, that even though English is my second language, I am going to fully integrate and process and be able to use the change work that Paul shares in this parallel to move me toward whatever your outcome is. So you're telling your other than conscious, even though English is not my native language, I want to get full benefit from this. Even though it's in the English language. Absolutely you can benefit. So no question there. Definitely. And again, I apologize for the delay in answering that one. Can trying too hard get in the way of reaching your goal? I love this question. I think when you're trying too hard, there's a basic assumption that it's not here now. And so you're bringing, you're, you're locking that in. It's not here, it's not here. I got to try harder. It's not here, it's not here. Gotta try harder. Not here, not here. Gotta try harder. So what, what you're doing is you're doubting that if you create it energetically, it's going to come to you physically. There's a disbelief, there's a disjoint there. I think you can absolutely shoot yourself in the foot if you're trying so hard because that implies you're convinced it's not here. One of the, you know that law, the law of receiving. The law of receiving is one of the laws of attraction and you get more of what you focus on. But I think the law of attraction is probably sometimes the law of allowing. How much are you, are you willing to allow into yourself? You know what, what is your comfort zone with allowing in a bigger goal or something that you are questioning whether you, you are able to achieve it? I think you need, often we need to work on how much are we willing to allow ourselves to receive, how much are we willing to, how much happiness can we stand, how much money can we stand, what are we willing to allow into our universe? So I think.

You can definitely do that again. You could chunk it down, you could chunk it down to smaller pieces if that's a persistent thing.

What I would probably go to with that would be the belief paraliminal, you deserve it, see what comes up, see why you're trying so hard and not sort of putting the action steps out there, putting the intent out there, getting clear on what you want and then allowing it to come in, just allowing it to be. And it doesn't mean you're passive, it just means you're relaxing into it and you're assuming it's going to happen. You're not doubting, you're assuming it just is taking a little longer than you might like. There was a very extensive one here.

I want to address. For nearly two decades, I've confused myself with other people's self development programs. They always say that you have to know exactly what you want and by when is this actually true. For example, I've always had an idea of how I wanted to be an overall feeling, I. E. Peaceful, happy, content. But having to convert it into an amount of money just sucks. Almost every personal development guru does this because you have to quantify it. For me, this conversion doesn't work well. Can you help me with a better way to set goals? Absolutely. The challenge with a being situation is how, how do you measure it? But I think if you can tune into being.

It'S almost like a consciousness. You know, I want to be more compassionate is not quantifiable. But if I get to the end of the day and I know I handled all the potentially confrontational.

Interactions that came at me with compassion, then I'm successful. I don't, I don't have to be able to say by this date I did this. So it's more of a being than a doing. And so I would probably go to self actualization for this because it sounds to me like you're working on more esoteric concepts and so you probably are going to do well with what fulfills you. What, what are you here to do? What are you here to be in that doing? Because you can do things and still have a being component. And it sounds to me that's where you're, you're getting crosswired. So I would definitely self actualization. Another one I want to recommend on the, based on the second part of this question is really all I want is to live a happy, healthy, wealthy life. And all these exercises are making me dream bigger and reach for more money than I actually need. Making the dream out of my reach. And it mentions Tony Robbins, the Money Money Master the Game. He said the main reason people don't reach their goals is because they think they need more dollars than they actually do. I want to recommend an awesome paraliminal for this. It's called the Soul of Money. And we did it with Lynn Twist. You probably lot out of her book which is by the same title, Soul of Money. The whole concept in Soul of Money is when is it sufficient? It's not a, a label that you put on a quantity of money. It's when is it enough? You know, and, and a lot of us don't, we, we get sucked into the marketing, we get sucked into the more, more, more. But when is it sufficient? You know, people that are happy are not always the millionaires. Some people have learned that happiness has, doesn't have to do with the money. It's how they're living their life, how they're being, how they're treating other people. And it sounds like that's where you're at. So I would definitely visit Soul of Money. I think you might get a lot out of that. Lynn Twist is a really interesting lady. I love her work. She's written a couple of books and she's very aligned with the Pachamama Alliance. So I think you'll get a lot out of her, her, her literature. But visit the Soul of Money parallel, I think you'll. You might get some significant answers. The other thing you might visit for that topic is happy Money too. Didn't even think that through. But that might be a good one that we did with Ken.

Okay. Hi. Please. What is your idea of the future? Self concept and goal achievement. And which of the parallel do you think can best help integrate this concept?

I love that question. Jack Canfield, we did an effortless success course with him and he has what he calls as a come as you'll be party and you dress up as what you want to be and what you want to be mastering in the world. And you know when you've fulfilled your dream life and you're living your life fully as what you want to be known for, who is that? So that come as you'll be party is is is a really great tool. It is actually. I've had some people do it with their friends and family and it is fun because you step into a role and you realize how accessible it really is. It's a being again, not a doing. There's another really good tool in our abundance for life course. I just want to briefly share. It's called the miracle question and it's if you went to bed tonight and the world is just as it is now, but tomorrow morning you woke up and you had achieved whatever your goal is that you' working on that future self concept, how would you know? And that can be a real eye opener because I've had people recognize things that were sort of peripherally on their radar, but they weren't front and center and that made all the difference for them. So that miracle question can be really profound as well. The parallel I probably visit for this topic are self actualization. Because when you're actualized then that is your future self. That is you being what you came here to be and the self love. Because again, if you love yourself, you're going to take the care and you're going to put your energy into and your time into what fulfills that self love. And again, that is you actualized when you're loving yourself. So few thoughts on that. Hi Wendy, I'm preparing for a job interview. Which parallel will be most helpful in preparing? And this job would be in medical testing sales. And I do not have a background in medical training. What do you suggest? Quickly learn and retain new material. 2 immediate thoughts on that. Peak performance and instantaneous personal magnetism. Both of those would be awesome. Either one, either or both before, maybe night before and morning of the interview. Peak performance is about being in the zone when you need to be in the zone. So we did that with Tom McCarthy and he was coaches a lot of executives, but also Olympic athletes. They get one crack at it, you know, one crack and that's it. So they need to be in peak, peak zone at the time they need to be in peak zone. Instantaneous personal magnetism is really good for people that are in sales or have to present regularly because it's about you being at your most charismatic and it has Nothing to do with being fake. It's with integrity. It's being, it's having integrity, being congruent, but also being in your most magnetic place. So those two would both be good for learning new material. It's really hard to beat the two parallel personal genius before you study, before you read, before you go to class and then memory supercharger to lock it in. Those two are just awesome. And that pairing. We have so many medical people, attorneys, students that are using those two really effectively because they really help you to as I said, process the information, you know, get clear on why you're looking to retain the information and then being able to bring it back when you need it. So those would be my thoughts on that. Oh, I just realized I forgot to mention the ones I would the parallel I would go to for the goal achievement. So let me just real quickly go through that. I mentioned belief and finding treasure in the context of one of the questions. These two are so good for their workhorses because you know, as I said, you think you can, you think you can't. You will be right. So those two are really good. I like self discipline because of the values alignment component. And I like it also because when you decide to be self disciplined you tend to look at your, your agenda differently and you prioritize what is most most important. A lot of us fritter away a lot of time on things that are not conducive to where we're trying to go in our life. So that one for that reason and then new behavior, new history. Any of the generator par terminals are great for any, any time you're stuck. If you're stuck in Always or never. The generators are just phenomenal. I want to talk about that next time on the next Q A. But those are the the ones that I would. I mean the, the new the topics by the topics index and the accelerator has I think it's about 20 parallel listed but those are the ones that I find people tend to do really really well with. So that sums up the questions for today. Boy, I had to talk for a long time. I wanted to leave you with. I know I've mentioned Neville Goddard before but.

Goal achievement, it's so important that you, you are clear on and sustain your commitment and your belief and your your knowing of why you're here and what you're here to do. And this is from a book he wrote called the Power of Awareness. And it's the great secret is a controlled imagination and a well sustained attention firmly and repeatedly focused on the feeling of the wish fulfilled until it fills the mind and crowds all other ideas out of consciousness. In other words, it's almost like it can't not happen because.

It'S what's in your consciousness and there's no room for anything else. There's only room for that goal achievement. So I wanted to leave you with that thought. He sums it up in what he often when he did autographs he often put assume the feeling of the wish fulfilled and it's the feeling, see it's the being again. It's not necessarily the doing is a component but the being is the root, it's the being it the being the result being in that consciousness, being in that energy and then the doing is putting it out there into the world. So that is it for today. Send you lots of love from all of us here at Learning Strategies and Mind Tracks and I'll say goodbye until next time you take care.

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