TJ LaFaver takes you through a day at 1st Phorm HQ in January, showing a knocker ball game, a hero workout dedicated to someone named Anna, and the team's chaotic moments involving peanut butter and waxing.
Oh.
Boy, oh, boy. Oh, yeah. Nice to see you. Yeah, nice that you show up. Last time we did this, someone tore their ACL. Torn some people's ACLs, hurt some girls. I'm not. I'm not proud of that fact, but, hey, when you're in that knocker ball, you don't know who the other person is. Ate a kiss and sink burrito. Yeah, it's gonna come up. All right, listen up and welcome to the first form back turf where hopes, dreams and aspirations go to die. And today, you two teams of stormy combatants will be facing off in the blood sport of knocker balls. Here's the rules. There are no fucking rules. Violence is the key. Contact. Imposing your will on the other person. Make them quit first form today. That is what we're trying to figure out.
Now. The game will be a team game. Soccer. The winners will win and the losers will. They will be facing infamous pro paintball player, Jonah Jambro.
Duh, duh, duh, duh. I'm the only minority. Don't shoot me. Okay. What's going, man? Oh, shit, we got another one. I ain't see him. Everyone get in your teams and divide yourselves into each side. Put on your balls.
All right. That thing got recoil on it.
Everyone needs to be on the field. Clear team, are you ready? Okay, Red team, are you ready?
Let's play.
Oh, hell yeah.
It's in. It's in. The clear team has won victory. Austin. Dave. So, Austin, what was the key to the two victories today? He was playing as a team, right? No MVPs. We were a team. We executed. We all knew our role, we played our role and we came out with the win. Good performance for you today. All right, Nick, you're first. Okay? What? Let's get the mask. Yeah. Yeah. That's the hardest part. Ah.
You son of a bitch. Am I just running straight? Oh, son of a. God. Sit.
All right, that's good.
Oh.
A really good shot. Look at. Turn around. Hold on. He got hair.
All right, he's good. Strategy one. You got a couple bum strategy, couple bum shots, all right? Can you hear me?
Still get them. Still get them.
Damn. He could have got us. That is. That is gonna hurt. All right, so we're gonna. We're gonna speed the process up. Jonah's gonna relinquish his mask so we can do doubles. Get a two for one combo. And the accountability. You guys gotta hold hands, though, the whole time.
Boy.
Hold on.
Hey. Hey, Coach. You better be ready. I'm draggin. Hey, no, no, no, no.
We're about to do a skit with a whole.
We're about to do a skit with the.
Oh, my God. All right. We're about to do a skit with a whole lot of peanut butter.
Okay, we need to discuss this.
Hey, bro, this is legit. Falling in my ass.
Got out of my eye. You.
All right? So who's on the bottom? Ever since first form releases salted peanut butter, protein peanut butter's taking over my life. I lost my wife, lost my kids. Probably after this, I'm gonna lose my job. And I hope that you guys can sincerely forgive me from the bottom of my heart. Psych.
Wasn't me, buddy.
This is bullshit. Oh. Oh.
There's 100% chance that this people up. This is gonna be a show. I mean, look at all the bodies. We are gonna have at least being a little bit. No, I. I'm not. There's gonna be at least 60% of the bodies on the floor.
Me. You know I can change. I got to put on you.
I want to tell you things right in your face, you know? You know I do.
It's where your blood. Making a highway a straight.
Is a star.
Remember, not every day is going to be a good day. But there's always something good in every day. Here you go. One on three. One, two, three.
This workout is hero workout, Anna. Every single month, we do a hero workout to spend time reflecting on those that have paid the ultimate sacrifice, Whether that's in the military, first responders, but taking this as an opportunity to have gratitude to. We get to do what we do every single day because of the sacrifices that they made. And it's something that we never, ever want to forget or take for granted. So today we dedicated this to Anna and her story. And we just encourage everybody to spend time reflecting on that. Whether you do a workout or just a little gratitude in your day, think about those that gave everything so you can have an opportunity with what you got. I feel okay. My chest hurts a little bit, but it's a great day. Whoever can finish that workout up and down in 45 minutes is a fucking God. How do you feel after the workout? Good. We killed it. It's hard not to with all these awesome people. It was great. It was really hard. I haven't competed like that in a long time with other people and just myself, so shout out to bitch loose. How was that workout, Darrell? It's a damn good one. It's a damn good one.
Grab.
What did we buy? Oh, my God. We bought the wrong one. No, we bought the right one.
That scared the out of me. So you got. You got eyes on Big banana?
Don't you do it, Gary.
Is it the Missouri Brown Streak back there? Hey, that's payback for, like, 2016. I used to do that to these guys back in the old hq. Don't do that to me, bro. I'll die. Yeah, there's a lot of hairy mofos here at first form.
No, I'm not doing that. Do you have chest hair? No, but I got hair everywhere else.
Should we do your nipple? Sure. Oh, my God. I don't know why I'm agreeing to this.
One, two.
All right, we're gonna go get Handsome Nick. He probably already doesn't have a lot of hair, but we're gonna see what he's got. Oh, why does it smell so bad? Okay, this is way more than I thought.
Oh, my goodness. Oh, that's. This one's perfect. One, two, three.
Oh, my God, he's sweating so much. What a big boy. Well, we're just gonna take a little. We're gonna do a strip all the way down.
Yeah, just a straight strip, top to bottom.
Oh. Oh, dude, that is, like. Okay, that's a little. That's burning.
That's. That's actually burning my skin. I'm not. I'm not joking. That's actually.
All right, let it cool. More. Oh.
That'S. Dude, dude, that is hot. Hot. Like, I'm not even. Okay, I have to rip this off. This is getting too hard. No, we need the whole thing. The whole thing. We have to try it. We have to at least try.
Stop moving. Dude, it is so hot. Dude, it is so hot. Like, I don't like.
No, it's okay. It's okay. It's okay. I'm fine.
All right.
Yeah. Good job now. I'm proud of you.
That's it. Done. Money.
Look at this.
That's good enough. That's good enough. I'm aware. I think we're. I think we're good. I think we're good.
