In this conversational video, REALTOR® Leigh Thomas Brown shares a poignant case study of an 89‑year‑old widow living in a family‑built home for 60 years. Faced with the practical challenges of yard and house upkeep after her husband’s death, the widow’s three adult children convene with the agent to discuss whether to sell. Brown walks through the ethical responsibility of a real‑estate professional to present honest pros and cons, emphasizing that sometimes the best advice is to tell a client “no, don’t sell.” She highlights considerations such as the client’s desire to stay, the risks of cognitive decline from moving, the family’s capacity to manage the property after the client’s death, and North Carolina’s legal requirement that all heirs and their spouses sign estate documents. The narrative underscores a servant‑leader mindset: prioritizing the client’s well‑being over commission, especially in a low‑inventory market where agents might feel pressure to list every property. Brown concludes by urging agents to act with integrity, offering to answer questions and provide further resources.
Chapters
One of the hardest things you'll ever learn how to do as a professional REALTOR® is tell somebody, "No, don't sell." Let me give you an example of when this might happen. So, I had this most emotional listing appointment here a few months ago where I was invited to the home of an elderly widow who lives in a house that my granddaddy built about 60 years ago. They've lived there the whole time. Now, her husband passed some several months ago And she was trying to figure out what to do, because now the yard is a lot to take care of, and the house is a lot to take care of. But y'all, that's the only place she's lived for longer than most of you have been alive. And so I went over to the house, and all 3 of the kids came over to have this conversation as one big family unit. Because one thing I know as a professional is that you want all the decision makers in the room at the same time. The last thing I want is for an elderly person to have to remember the details and give it to the kids who are then going to ask their own questions and possibly just cause more confusion and stress. And I don't want to add stress to anybody. So all 3 of the kids are in the room with me and with mom. And we went through the numbers and they couldn't believe it because the markets have generated some numbers that don't make sense to a lot of us, but those are the numbers. And so I asked her a very important question. I said, "Where are you going to go if we sell the house?" And she said she might go move in with this one of the kids. And he's fine with that. And the siblings were fine with that. And I said, "Do you want to though?" I mean, at the age that she is, which is 89, let's just be honest, life doesn't last forever. And we know that her days on earth are numbered. She's going to go home at some point here and excited about that. So I said, "Why would you move and go through all that stress when she's got some early onset slippage?" I won't call it dementia, but there's some slippage. And anytime you change the routine and the locations, the slippage can get worse. And that's just hard for everybody involved. And she said, "I just don't want to have to leave a burden on the kids. I don't want them to have to manage the house after I'm gone." Well, I did the long bony Leigh mom finger of shame, and I looked at the 3 of them. I said, "Are y'all okay with managing this after your mama's gone? Can y'all handle this amongst yourselves?" And they said, "Yes, we can." I looked back at her and I said, "You have raised very intelligent grown people. They can manage this. And so you get to decide We're not going to worry about what they have to deal with after. We want you to be happy. And she said, well, if they can handle it, I'd really just rather stay. And I said, then we're not selling this house. You stay here as long as possible or until the Lord calls you home, and then we'll deal with it. And so we finished our conversation with this idea that she can stay. The moral of the story is sometimes you think you're supposed to sell your real estate because of somebody else, but after you look at the pros and the cons— and that's what your professional REALTOR® is supposed to do, y'all. You're supposed to be in the conversation to give some pros and cons to the scenario and give some color commentary, and then let people stay put. I know that one day I will get to sell that house and she will get to go to her great reward. And I also already told the kids, by the way, that of the 3 of them, all of them will have to sign, all of their spouses will have to sign because of the way North Carolina is structured. But I want one point of contact. And so I want them to elect among themselves a voice for the family. And put that in writing so that we can keep things moving along efficiently to also make it a good transition for whoever the lucky person is that gets to move into a house that has been loved by one family for 60 years. Now, it's a hard thing to do in real estate, especially in a market such as this one where we have a low level of inventory, to be able to walk away from a listing. But that's the most important part of your job sometimes, is to tell somebody the truth so that they get their best possible outcome. Because friends, my daddy told me that on day one in this business, and he told me that every day until he retired, if you do people the right way, the money will find you later. And you have to have that mindset always. Figure out that someday you'll be able to be compensated. But right now, I want you to be in that servant leader mindset to do the best thing for the people who've shown you an honor by calling you in the first place. So that's a hard thing to do in real estate. If you have any questions about what you should be doing or things that you don't know how to handle, drop it in the comments or send me a direct message and check out some more resources. I'll see you next time.
