This content was created by Lewis Howes. This content was uploaded by Lewis Howes. This is a YouTube video titled "How childhood SHAME impacts your relationships!" created on August 29, 2025. It features a conversation involving Lewis Howes and other speakers discussing the impact of childhood shame and injustice on adult relationships and personality traits.
Chapters
I stole something from school, which is, you know, my mom was really upset, which was good, by the way, that I learned a lesson. But in front of my entire classroom, she said that I had stolen pencil.
Sharper.
Pencil, you know, sharpener. Yes. And so I was crying in front of the classroom and I felt embarrassed. So then later, people who experience a lot of shame are the ones that turn into, you know, people that can withstand a lot of abuse later in life because that's what. It feels familiar to you, you know, And I gotta say something that I think it's very important. It's not our parents fault. We should, you know, stop blaming our parents for the way we are. They did what they could with what they could, they did their best with what they. The tools they had, you know, the things they had. So.
And it's up to us to heal ourselves. And then there's another one that's called the injustice one. So something that happened to you at one point in life that you felt things were unjust, you know, whether it's, whether it's, you know, the way in your perspective they treated your sister or your brother way better than they treated you, that felt unjust. So then you didn't fix that inside of you. So then later in life, it makes you a very rigid person, rigidity, you know, you want things to be a certain way and that's it.
Or you're just triggered if you see injustices constantly and everything is unjust and it takes a lot of your energy to manage those emotions.
Yeah.
And so if things were unjust for you when you were a little kid, you replicate it as an adult in ways of. You become competitive with your partner because you're trying to find justice. Oh, you know what? I work so much. Of course you take care of the kids and don't tell me anything about anything because this is what's fair. Wait, let's talk about it. So this is that type of personality. So for me, you know, this I needed to dive down inside of what was my life story, what was my wounds, why was I attracting these type of personalities and why was it that whenever I attracted a nice guy, it felt boring? That happens to a lot of people.
