How I learned The Champion Mindset

For over a decade, I've asked the world's greatest athletes, what is the key to a champion's mindset? It's not in that comfort zone. It's in the discomfort zone is where my confidence is getting built. It wasn't a physical thing that kept me from winning. It was a mental thing. You have to go all in and you have to take that risk just to see it through, to see if it will work. I knew already I'm gonna become number one of the world. Understanding that nothing is ever perfect, but the challenge is try to get 'em as perfect as they can be.

Mm-hmm.

And what can you do? It's in your control, so control what you can. Everything over this past year has been leading up to this weekend. This will decide who will be the national champion, and I have invested my time, my resources, my money to trying to build the best team possible. And if we lose in this weekend, it could mean losing everything over this past year. It is the final weekend of the national championships. I've taken over the Los Angeles Handball Club about 5 months ago. We've had 2 tournaments, one in Chicago, one in Denver, and this is the final weekend to determine the USA champion in handball for 2026. We found this facility, it's an Olympic facility, and we are putting down the lines and setting up. In about 24 hours, a number of teams from around the country will be here competing for the national championship. This tournament doesn't make or break my Olympic dream, but it is an important part in the development of USA handball. If we win, the Los Angeles Handball Club will be crowned the national champions. That'll be the first time in 16 years that LA Handball Club is the USA National Champions. That'll give us an automatic qualifier to the North American Championship in Mexico. We've got our guys who have flown in from around USA and also all over Europe. This is what we do. We gotta show up when the moment happens, and we are doing our best to prepare right now. Game 1 done. It was a hard first half. All in all, good win. I think we won by 9. Should have won by 20. It's okay. Game 1 complete. Everyone's healthy. Get our minds right for a big Day number 2. It feels good to win and to win with the right people on our team, to be able to rebuild a club, start from scratch, build the brand and the vision together as a team, recruit great people, and share the story Over the whole year, the whole journey from what we were building from the beginning to now winning the national championship. For me, it was a powerful weekend knowing that there were so many different challenges happening at one time that we were able to stay focused and come out winners. How do you focus on the process even though you have the goal in mind, but not being attached to the outcome?

Control what you can control. The things you can control, you can work hard, you can be disciplined, You can be mindful about your recovery, invest in yourself.

The biggest thing that's keeping me motivated towards the Olympic dream without having any certainty at all that it's going to happen— I don't want to let my younger self down.

I think everything that I injured, whether it be amazing or incredibly difficult, was all meant to be. And I think That's how I learned to navigate such difficult moments in my life.

I have so many people criticizing, critiquing me, telling me it's not going to happen. It's not possible. You're too old. And that's okay with me. I'm not here to prove anyone wrong, and I don't want to live with any regrets when I'm older. I just think that the younger version of me and the older version of me would say, gosh, are you really going to give up that easily? For me, I would rather go all in on something because my heart is telling me to. and fail and be proud of myself, be proud of the younger version of me and the older version of me that says, hey, we went for this, and if we fail, that's okay. Failure is the pathway to success. You must fail if you want to succeed.

I think it's so easy to look 2, 5, 10 years into the future and being like, oh my gosh, that's so crazy. Like, I don't know if I'll be able to do that. I'm not good enough yet. I don't know if I'll be healthy. I don't know what my life is gonna look like, that I'm scared.

I don't know what the end lesson is going to be from this journey over the next 2 more years. I'm always thinking about future hindsight. If I could look into the future and then reflect back now to where I'm at, my future self is telling me, you don't know if you're gonna accomplish this goal or not, but keep going. You're improving your health, you're improving your mindset, you're inspiring people, you're showing up for your wife and your kids. And you're showing them what's possible as a father. I want my twin girls to be like, man, Dad went for it. He gave it his all. That's something that I can look back on and be proud of. I can look them in their eyes and say, I went for it and I have no regrets.

My therapist tells me that humans are naturally scared of the unknown. So that anxiety, the fear, the doubt is so natural and normal. But at the end of the day, if you set small goals for yourself, control what you can control, I feel like you're gonna look up one day and be exactly where you wanted to be.

This is our first trip with the twins, which complicates some things. And just when we thought we had everything in our control— Martha, the flight just got delayed 2 and a half hours.

Shut up. Is this true?

Oh.

Okay.

It's a joke?

No?

No.

Okay. We're not getting in till 9:30 PM now. So we were driving down to San Diego to jump on a flight to go to Querétaro, Mexico, but our flight got delayed for 2 hours. This is our first trip with the babies, and we decided to stop, get a little food, check out the beach, do some grounding, walk around barefoot.

Athletes can have a hard time because they have a hard time letting go of, like, control.

So I surrender almost.

Yeah, you have to just let go.

We were a little anxious for our first trip with the baby, but we got to learn to be flexible. You know, learn to be flexible, go with the flow. And so we're trying to relax a little bit before we get to the airport, and hopefully everything goes smoothly after that.

Flexibility!

So I'm already a little bit stressed and a little bit on edge making sure our twin girls flying for the first time internationally, everything's going to be okay. I'm coordinating our team to get to Mexico. I'm trying to prepare for the North American Championship in my mind. I just had to shift my energy and say, you know what, let's just make the most of this. Let's relax. We're going to get there. Everything's going to be okay. I think we have this false idea that we have more control than we think, but really we are limited in what control we have. And this is what you see with the greatest athletes in the world. They respond to adversity better than others. They show up one step at a time. One moment at a time, recalibrating their energy to come back to the greatest version of themselves that they can be in that moment. One of the things I think about when I'm curating events and experiences is how you can bring people together in a unique way. And currently I'm here in Querétaro, Mexico, and it is just beautiful. We are here for the North American Championship.

Woo!

Instead of staying in a hotel and not really having the right unity together, I wanted to create an experience, a vibe. And we booked this home here on Airbnb in the center of Querétaro, Mexico. And it is just a beautiful surrounding. And we have this home where everyone has a room. We're having breakfast in the morning and shared dinners at night, and people are connecting instead of just staying in hotel rooms where everyone's isolated. All in one place. And these athletes are coming from all over the world to play in the North American Championship, and this allows us to connect and talk about life and strategies and all the things we're up to as well outside of handball. And I think that's something that everyone should be thinking about more, is being intentional about how you create your environment. We have proximity, like we are in the center of town here in Querétaro, Mexico, so everyone's able to go experience the city and experience the culture while they're also here to try to win a championship When you're traveling and when you're doing a trip and you're trying to create a cool experience with a group specifically, things add up. And that's one of the reasons why I love actually listing my space on Airbnb as well. And it's a way to earn extra money so that I can spend it on these guys to make sure they're having a great time as well. 1, 2, 3, LA! Whether it's with your friends, with your family, on a work trip, personal trip, how do you create those moments that are bigger than just the trip? They're memories that you have for life. And when you can combine it with unique When you create unique experiences or unique spaces with unique people, that's when magic happens. One of the biggest lessons that sport has taught me is really about having the right people on your team who all share the same goal and are all committed in the same ways. I think you can only do so much on your own. As an athlete, the energy around you can affect you so much. So you need to be focused on being your best version of yourself within your sport and within the team. And if not, usually you won't come out victorious. Even if you lose at the end and you're not victorious, you reflect on the memories you have with the people you're surrounded by. And team is everything. You know, life is not an individual sport. Life is a team sport. Family is a team sport. Business is a team sport. My business would not be where it is without meaningful relationships of shared respect and shared value. The Los Angeles Handball Club would not be where it is without the support of other people and other players on our team. team that has supported the group effort in making something special and putting it out there in the world. My family, with my wife, my mom, her parents, siblings that are all supporting us in our family and in our twin girls, making sure that we have the support at home when we're traveling, when there's a lot on our plates, we have a good team. And it's just life is a team sport. You can't play this sport on your own. At least you won't go very far if you try to do everything It was a long trip, almost a full day of travel. Brought my babies, brought my family. A lot of logistics, a lot of kinks in travel as well. A lot of guys got here late last night, so they're still warming up from, from all over the world. So far so good, getting connected with everyone. If we win the finals, then we qualify for the 12 World Championships in Egypt at the end of this year. So it'll be like the LA Handball Club, an amateur club, Playing against the Lakers or the Boston Celtics, that's what it'll feel like playing against the top players and the top teams in the world. Well, all they do is play, train, sleep, eat handball. You know, my dream is to be in the 2028 Olympics.

Yes.

With the USA handball team. There's no guarantees.

Right.

I've got 2 and a half more years. This is my last chance to make the team. As an Olympic athlete, and this is something I've been pursuing for 20 years, knowing that there's only so much I can do, which is take care of my conditioning, my athletic ability, my health, but making the team and being on the roster is not 100% in my control. What advice would you have to me as a 3-time Paralympic medalist on how I should approach this season?

I think you should just fall in love with the process. Because it is the process that builds you. It's the process that you'll remember.

You can't be obsessed with the outcome of the goal. You have to be obsessed with making the process more evolved, more effortless, and more enjoyable on the way there. Rest at the end, not in the middle. And that's something I always live by. I'm not going to rest. I'm going to keep on pushing now. There are a lot of answers that I don't have. Even questions that I don't have, but I'm just going to keep going. I'm just going to keep going, and I'll figure these things out as we go.

Right?

And you just continue to build that way. Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments.

Right?

So whatever in life you you know you envision to do, you got to be disciplined. You can do whatever you want. You just need to be able to have sacrifices, discipline, and hard work. Discipline. is deciding between what you want now and what you want most. And I think discipline is the path to greatness. You grow most when you push yourself into the discomfort, push yourself into your fear, and that's where you grow most as a human being.

Everybody has insecurities, everybody has doubt, everybody has fear, a what-if type of thing. But when you're truly like in the moment, That stuff doesn't matter.

Mm-hmm.

I learned that I play better when I'm just in the moment and I prepare, do the best I can, and then I live with it. You should take the shots you should take regardless of what the previous play is.

Winning the North American Championship under the Los Angeles Handball Club name means a lot. We are an amateur team that practices once a week, and we're going to Egypt to play against professionals that practice every day. So this is going to be an opportunity to see how we show up, how we respond to challenges, how we respond to adversity. We have no guarantees of any type of result, but I do know that we can show up as a team and give our best effort.

Even if you were standing on a podium, looking back, the things you'll remember is the people along the way, the little moments along the way, uh, the things that you learned about yourself along the way. Once you get there, it's so fleeting.

You know, it's interesting because I had kids later in life than most people, and I always thought, wouldn't it be cool if I had kids when I was still playing sports and they could come watch my games? And so for me, I got pretty emotional just seeing my kids on the sidelines, getting to be with them right after the game, you know, give them a sweaty hug afterwards. I don't know how many more games I'll get to play, how many more times they will get to watch their dad play a sport at a high level. Life is about the moments and the memories you make with the people you care about the most. It has been a challenging year. The birth of my twins being a beautiful blessing, But also with Martha going in the hospital, to the ups and downs and the challenges, to our house getting broken into twice in the last year, to the challenges of starting the Los Angeles Handball Club essentially from scratch again, to moving into a new office space, to building the team here at the School of Greatness, to injuries and overcoming injuries and the rehab. It has been a nonstop year with a lot of different challenges and also a ton of blessings. And to be able to have those moments with my kids and my wife at the Games is something that I will always cherish and always remember.

You get there, and if anything, you don't always feel like, I made it. You maybe feel that way for a moment, but then you're, you're like, well, what's next? What do I, what do I got to do next? And so it really is really appreciating The process and being super present in it. Even if you make it and even if you win medals, what you'll remember most is not what it felt like to stand on the podium getting the medal. You'll remember what it took to get there.

I've won a lot of accomplishments over the years, you know, from 2-time All-American to national championships to North American championships to All- State medals, all these different things over the years. And all the accomplishments and awards are fun, but the real moments is everything else in between, not the end result, whether you win or lose. It's the day-to-day. It's the practice. It's the time with your friends, with your family. It's the little victories, the little wins. It's the little improvements every single day. That really is what it's all about. And it's learning how to appreciate everything that has happened up until now and continuing to stay focused in every moment of my life. We just finished a week in Mexico for the handball tournament, but we've got to go catch a bus to get to the airport, then go back to Los Angeles, get in around midnight or 1 AM, change, shower, pack, head to the airport again tomorrow as we go to Australia. I don't know how long that flight is. 13 to 15 hours. Brisbane, Sydney, Melbourne, back to back to back cities speaking.

Okay.

For the Greatness in Business event series.

Sit down.

And then fly back to LA and hopefully at that point get a week to just rest.