Evie, a polygraph examiner, shares how to spot signs of infidelity and what to do if you suspect your partner is cheating. She draws on real cases to explain what liars actually do, beyond the clichés.
You're trying to figure out if they're cheating on you. I'll make it super simple. And if they start to reveal stuff and you start yelling, guess what? Oh yeah. Interview's over.
Uh huh.
So here's the question, what is your goal? If your goal is, I need to find out what this person has done so I can make a decision of whether I want to stay with them or not. I need information. So this is when you have to self-regulate and say, I'm not here to yell, I'm here to get intelligence. Intel, so I can make a good decision. Because when you don't have intelligence, you make bad decisions. That's true. When people feel that you're going to judge them, they're gonna stop telling you stuff and they're gonna filter information. And then you're gonna make bad decisions in life. Because you don't know the truth. And the choices you make are made off of bad information. That's the key. Then when you get everything you need to get, then you can go. I'll tell you the story. I had a boyfriend. Actually, boyfriend, we were together, he leaves me. He starts dating somebody else. Broke my heart, broke my heart.
How old are you? Roughly?
I'm in, you're gonna make bad decisions in life because you don't know the truth. And the choices you make are made off of bad information. That's the key. Then when you get everything you need to get, then you can go. I'll tell you the story. I had a boyfriend. Actually, boyfriend, we were together, he leaves me. He starts dating somebody else. Broke my heart, broke my heart.
How old are you, roughly?
I'm in my 20s, I'm in my late 20s. Secret Service agent. I know.
He was a Secret Service agent. He was as well. He was as well.
He was as well. So he leaves me, breaks up with me, And then I surmise he's seeing someone else, and then he goes to that person, sees that person, then all of a sudden he reappears months later. Evie, Evie, Evie. Now he broke my heart, so of course when they do the leaving and you're the one left, you're like, oh.
He wants me back.
He's back. But something wasn't right, right? And I'm a polygraph examiner at this point, so. And I surmise, I'm like, I think he's still talking to her, but he's trying to talk to me.
Mm, sneaky dog.
Sneaky dog. So as painful as it was, I started asking questions. You know, what happened? You must miss her. You talk to her, what was that like? And he starts revealing information to me. Now, my heart's broken as I'm hearing this. Don't get me wrong. But he starts revealing, Yes, I'm talking to her and I'm talking to you and I don't know what to do. I'm so confused. I'm like, Must be confusing, you know? I mean, tell me more. So I'm sitting, listening through this. I'm listening to this because I need to know what's going on so I can make a decision. Because I don't want to get hurt again. So he reveals everything. He's like, you know, so in the end, it's like, I just don't know what to do. I don't know who to be with. This is where I got him. I got it all. I was just like, so it ends, I have everything I need now, so I still couldn't help myself. I'm not saying you should do this, but I was like, you know what? Let me make it easy for you. I'm no longer a choice. I suggest you go to her.
Wow.
Secret Service Agent: Your Neutral Face Is Making People Distrust You (Here's How to Fix It)
