James Sexton contrasts love as active attention and shared joy with indifference as mutual disengagement. Love means taking on your partner's sadness as your own burden. Indifference wins a hollow victory where both stop caring.
Because love is about, I'm paying attention. I want to please you. Your pleasure gives me pleasure. Your joy gives me joy. Your sadness becomes my burden, you know, and it becomes something I want to alleviate. So indifference, that sense of, I don't care what you're doing. I don't care if you're happy. I don't care if you're sad. I don't care. That's the thing. And, and that's where people land sometimes, you know, is they just land in that place where, where they used to care. And then in this escalating war of, well, I shouldn't have to do that. Well, I shouldn't have to do this. Well, I shouldn't have to do that. Well, then I shouldn't have to do that. And now you got two people that are just great. You guys won. Good job. Neither of you has to do anything for each other anymore. Great job.
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