People fail at tough conversations by not being direct enough. The speaker says you need self-control first, understanding your own emotional triggers so you can recognize them in others. Then state your position clearly, face-to-face, instead of venting online where nothing gets resolved.
Chapters
What do you think is the biggest mistake you see people making today when it comes to having challenging conversations? Not having enough assertiveness in that communication. You have the area of control, controlling yourself. And by controlling yourself and understanding your own triggers, you're better to see those triggers in other people. Step two is saying it with confidence, meaning you learn to say things assertively. you say things that are going to make sure they know where you stand, that you say what you mean and mean what you say. That's a whole lot harder for a lot of people because they don't want to be very direct. They'd rather type it on that keyboard and put it in a YouTube comment than ever say it to your face.