The Most EYE OPENING Speech On Manifesting & Attracting SUCCESS! | Sadhguru

Let us not think anger happens to us, resentment happens to us. No, these things we are creating. We have the power to emote. We can make it love, we can make it joy, we can make it ecstasy, but people have chosen to make it...

When we have emotions, thoughts, feelings, emotions of anger, resentment from something that happened in the past, upset that we see on social media, Frustrations in the world, where should we be redirecting these thoughts, feelings and emotions?

You must punch a window pane or a wall better. A stone wall is good.

You'll feel it, boy, yeah, exactly.

Because that is the model that the Hollywood and the television shows, everything is setting up. When you get angry, you break something, all right?

Exactly.

So, see, first of all, people are assuming that anger is happening to them or misery is happening to them. No, this is exactly what I said earlier, maybe I didn't articulate it fully. No, you are creating anger, you are creating misery, you are creating joy, you are creating whatever. All this is happening from within you. Is it true all human experience is happening from within us?

It's... it's... yeah, because we perceive something.

And then we... Something else may stimulate, but human experience is happening from within us, isn't it?

Right.

Whether it's love or hate or anger or misery or joy or anything is only happening from within us. The simple question I am asking is, what happens from within you? Should it happen your way? or somebody else's way.

It should happen your way.

Of course, because the world will never happen your way hundred percent. Because there are so many stakeholders in the world, little bit will happen my way, little bit your way, that is fine. But what happens within me must happen my way. If what happens within me does not happen my way, this is the worst form of slavery, isn't it?

Wow.

Somebody decides what happens within me, somebody decides where I should sit, this is slavery, everybody understands this. Now somebody decides whether I am happy or unhappy, isn't this the worst form of slavery?

Yeah.

So this is the liberation that humanity needs to work at. This is what inner engineering means. Inner engineering is not some mechanical process. Because engineering means this essentially. You will say something is well engineered only if it works the way you want, isn't it? If this one doesn't work the way you want, what the hell are you expecting other things to work the way you want? It's just an accident. When you live accidentally, anxiety is normal.

Yes, it's every day. But when you're living on purpose and intentionally and mindfully, you should be able to shift out of that.

No, no, no, no, I wouldn't use those words.

Okay, what words would you use?

Yes.

When you say purpose, intention, mindful, see this is the whole problem with people, their mind is full all the time.

Right.

My mind is just empty all the time, nothing happening, nothing. That's why I wear a turban just to make it substantial. There's nothing in my head. If I'm walking there, I'm just walking, nothing happens. Because see right now your hands are there. Suppose your one hand starts jumping like this. Or if let's say my hand starts jumping like this, what will you think? You think Sadhguru has some kind of ailment, isn't it?

I just don't know. That's the way intelligent people do things, you know?

No, no. Suppose my hand starts jumping like that, you will think there is some ailment, isn't it? You will think, maybe Mr. Parkinson's is visiting me or something like that.

Sure.

So, your mind is jumping all over the place. Why is that not an ailment, I am asking? Your only comfort is other people cannot see it, isn't it?

Yeah, I guess they see it through the manifestation of you being anxious or tense or stressed or angry or...

Whether they see it or not. They see it or not. If any part of you is simply jumping without purpose, is that an ailment I'm asking?

If any part of you is jumping without purpose, is it an ailment? Well, I think in your inner engineering course, you talk about how we have certain faculties that we can't control, like going to the bathroom and doing certain things that are part of our body.

So, yeah, but I don't know if.

That'S a trick question or not.

No, no, the pee is just filling up in the bladder. It's not jumping all over the place.

Gotcha, gotcha.

If it jumps all the over place, that is an ailment.

That's an ailment, yes, correct.

Right now, suppose, let me take a worse example. Suppose your hand starts beating you in the face.

That's an ailment, yes.

For sure. So right now your thoughts and emotions are beating you up from inside. Why is that not an ailment, I am saying?

No, it is.

So, Let us not think anger happens to us, resentment happens to us. No, these things we are creating. We have the power to emote. We can make it love, we can make it joy, we can make it ecstasy, but people have chosen to make it tension, anger, resentment, hatred. They have turned it that way. Now they will claim this is because life has been unfair to me. Life has not been fair to anybody. Especially not me. Life is not fair to anybody. Life is simply rolling. It's for you to learn to ride it. Sometimes we are in uncomfortable situations, sometimes we are in comfortable situations, sometimes we are in situations where we know exactly what to do, and sometimes we are in situations where we don't know what to do. Sometimes somebody else is controlling the situation, Sometimes you are controlling the situation, this is how life is. If you are constantly stepping into unfamiliar situations in your life, that means you are growing at a rapid pace. If you are in constantly in comfortable situations, that means you are a stagnant life.

Hmm.

So if you... if you look for comfort, if you look for a comfort zone, because the moment Your thoughts and emotions are going to torment you with external stimulant, external stimulation that happens. What will you choose? You will choose a comfort zone. This means you will limit your life. So the moment somebody can cause you pain or suffering, this means unknowingly you will make the very scope of your life very limited. Only when a person loses this fear of suffering that no matter what happens, this is how I will be. If this assurance comes to you, then you walk full stride because whatever happens in the life around you, it will not really make you suffer. Once you are free from suffering, only when you are free from suffering, when you are free from the fear of suffering, that is when you will explore your life in full depth and dimension.

How do we rid ourselves of the fear of suffering then?

See, as I told you, the suffering is happening because your faculties are not held in your hands. If I have to go to this in little detail, I will have to take a few minutes. See, for example, if I ask you a simple question, Do you want your intellect to be sharp or blunt? What is your choice?

Sharp.

Sharp, of course. So you understand, your intellect is the better... the sharper it is, the better it is, it's like a knife. So, if it's like a knife, it's a cutting instrument. So, if you give anything to your intellect, it will dissect everything and see, this is the nature of our intellect. You don't have to physically dissect, but it dissects everything and sees, what is this, what is that? This is the nature of the intellect. Without dissection, it doesn't know because it is a knife, it's like a scalpel. It must be sharp. A knife that is not sharp is no good knife. Isn't it?

Right. Good for butter.

Yeah, that also depends. It just comes out of the refrigerator, even that it won't cut.

So.

If you are using a knife to do everything, to do everything, let's say you eat with a knife, you brush with your knife and you do everything with your knife, of course you will be bleeding. That's all that's happening. Only one dimension of intelligence within us. In yogic way of looking at things, we look at mind as sixteen parts. This intellect is just one part. Because our education systems are such, which are totally intellect oriented, human beings largely are using only one dimension of their intellect to do everything. You use a knife to stitch your clothes, What will you wear? Only tatters. See, that's what you are seeing in Los Angeles right now. Half the people are wearing tattered clothes. Maybe they used a knife to stitch their jeans.

Exactly. With holes in them, yes.

So if you use a knife to stitch, that's what will happen all tatters. Right now human life is in tatters, mainly because of this. Instead of using a needle, you are using a knife. So intellect is a very good instrument of survival. If you want to survive on this planet, you need a sharp intellect. The sharper it is, the better you will survive. But that will not make life, that will not put everything together. Right now because through intellectual process, people are trying to handle everything. With so much care they're trying to do everything right, right, right, right and blunder. The result is a blunder. Everything right but the end result is a big blunder because you're using a knife to do everything.

Okay, here's a question for you. When was the last time that you felt anger or resentment and actually expressed it?

I was just thinking of getting angry with you just now.

Perfect.

Bring it.

I love that.

The thing is, Louis, I did not give this privilege to anybody that somebody can make me happy, somebody can make me unhappy, somebody can make me angry, somebody can make me miserable. I have not given that privilege to anybody. It's not that I'm incapable of all these things. If I want, I can be all those things. Right. But I have not given this privilege to anybody. They can't do something to me and make me angry.

No.

I have not given that privilege to anyone.

Did you have that experience or give that privilege to someone when you were younger? Did you learn that at a certain point where you transitioned?

Till I was 23-24 years of age, from the age of probably 11-12, I was always 24 hours angry.

Really?

Most, yes. Because I was, I was on this binge of what is justice and injustice. So once you start looking what is justice and injustice, just about everything in the world looks unjust.

Everything makes you angry.

All small things.

Yeah.

Yeah, everything, anything unjust means it makes me angry. And everywhere I see, whether at home, in school, on the street, in the society, in the country, in the world, Wherever I see, I think this is unjust, this is unjust, this is unjust, so much injustice, always angry.

Right.

I feel like there's a lot of people in America and in the world who a lot of things make them angry and there's a lot of injustice for people. So when did you shift and how did you come to that realization that this no longer works for you in your life?

See, it doesn't work for anybody.

That's true.

Not just for me.

But for you personally, when did you realize?

See, the reason why people think anger is some kind of a virtue, because they say righteous anger, all right? Right now America is seething with anger and they think it's righteous anger. This is simply because it takes some horrible thing to stimulate them into action. There is not enough love in your heart to stimulate yourself into action. Something has to poke you, you must get angry and then it propels you into action. So that kind of action sometimes will produce results of course. But if you want genuine results which will be good for everybody, we must do it when everything is right. But when everything is little comfortable, nobody does anything. When something horrible happens, then we will get angry and propel ourselves into action. Right now, this propelling yourself into action with anger, how long will you keep it up?

You cannot keep it up forever.

You cannot keep it up forever.

Yeah, you get tired. Yes.

If you keep it up forever, you will destroy yourself and you will destroy everything around yourself. So, anger is become valuable because most people are so lethargic in their responses. Once in a way when they get angry, they feel empowered and seem to be doing right things once in a way. You must be doing those right things all your life, then by the end of your life everything might not have changed but you would have made a difference. that's the way the world works.

So how I'm man. So if people are lethargic and comfortable a lot of the times and they're unwilling to choose love and act with love to make a change, how do we get people to wake up when things are calmer so that they can act with love and get the change in the results they want?

See, today this whole movement, what you're seeing as Inner Engineering, is a movement from religion to responsibility in a way. Essentially what I mean is, religion means people are thinking responsibility is somewhere up there. Where is that up? Nobody knows, all right? You just have to believe where is that up. But now you are sitting in California, I am here in Tamil Nadu. If I look up, I am looking at... looking up in one direction, if you look up, you are looking up in another direction. So my up is different, your up is different, and by tomorrow morning again, my up will be yours, your up will be mine. It'll be a big confusion. The damn planet is spinning and it's round, which way is up? Does anybody know which way is up in this universe? Is it marked somewhere in the cosmos? This side up? There is no such thing. So, responsibility is up there. No, no, no, it must come here. We must understand, if we want to live in a wonderful world, it's only us and us and us who can make this happen. No other force from anywhere is going to make this happen. Unless we realize and transform ourselves from religion to responsibility, that it's here, what this whole thing has come up is. See, because we have no explanation for creation. Before you and me came, so much creation has happened. Who did it? A simplistic, childish understanding of this is, A big man must have done it. So he is somewhere up there because you can't see him here. He must be up there. Now of course women are claiming, why not it be a woman? In India we sorted these problems out. There are... we have man gods, we have woman gods, we have snake god, we have cow god, we have elephant god, we have every kind crawling ones, creeping ones, flying ones because we foresaw all the future problems that may happen. You don't know who will claim what tomorrow. So we said everything is God. So what I am saying is, Our idea of God has essentially come because we have no explanation for creation. How did all this happen? Such a complex, fantastic stuff. Who did it? Because we are human, we think it must be a big human being. Suppose you and me were buffaloes having conversation right now, we would definitely think God is a huge buffalo, isn't it? Nobody could argue with us about that. We would definitely say he's a huge buffalo because that would be our imagination. Right now this is our imagination, it's fine. If you are using it to settle a few things, if you are using it as a way of a psychological process, fine. But solace is one thing, solutions for life is a different thing. So one first thing that we must decide is, those who are in extreme states of poverty, war, other kinds of misery imposed upon them, only for them you must give solace. Rest of us who have eaten our breakfast today morning or dinner, we should talk about solution, not solace. Solace is just a psychological process to settle something within you. But why? People who have eaten well, people who are healthy, people who have a life to live, why are they psychological problem? They should not have any psychological problems, that's all I'm saying. I know this will be very cruel for a lot of people, but they better get it because life is brief. If they don't get it now and they think being psychologically disturbed is normal, they will spend their life like this, it is not normal. To be healthy is normal, to be balanced is normal, to be joyful is normal. Look at yourself when you're five years of age, were you miserable or joyful? and if somebody had to make you take the joy out of you by poking you with something, otherwise joy wouldn't go, you would be bouncing all over the place, isn't it? Today somebody has to make you happy, somebody has to work hard to make you happy. At that time somebody had to work hard to make you miserable. Today somebody has to make you work hard to make you happy. The whole equation has gotten reversed. What is it? What is it that happened to you? You just grew up. if you grew up, life should become better when you grow up, isn't it?

One of the ways that I talk about the law of attraction or the secret is sort of in a different way from the way I used to speak about it, because I'm always looking how can I make it even simpler? And I mean basically that work talks about the power of the mind and the power of thought to create a physical world and material world and then the greatest secret takes that to a whole new level actually. And so then you really get to see that, oh my gosh, it's super easy. Create anything I want. Like really, so easy. Because if we have a belief it's hard, then it's gonna be hard, you know? And so it has everything to do with our mind and what we believe. And so if we believe a thought, it will manifest. End of story.

So if we believe we are deserving of great love, then we will manifest. If we believe we are going to be poor, we're going to stay poor. If we believe we don't deserve something, then it's not going to come to us.

And, you know, it's interesting because, because for all of us, you know, and we've been conditioned, you know, I mean, you were very fortunate because you, you had a, a childhood where you were mind was opened and you were opened and your heart was opened. And that's the biggest, biggest thing, is to open yourself to the possibility that everything isn't the way it appears to be. And so even if you can just open yourself to that possibility just for a moment, you can pick up it all the next day. You can take it all with you the next day that it's all real and everything that you're seeing. But if you just for a moment open to the possibility that things might not be the way that you think they are, then you have the greatest opportunity to really discover something incredible, how incredible you are. So with the Secret, yeah, I describe it really, and so I really simplify it and the Law of Attraction because I would say to anybody, if you would just think about what you want, that's all you'd ever get in your life.

It's as simple as that. But a lot of people think a lot of negative things. They consistently it's on a loop that just holds them into this negative pattern. So how do we break that negative thought pattern?

Right. So, I mean, the mind is like a computer program. So, and the fact that it's on a negative loop is because we programmed it on a negative loop. But, you know, we could have been influenced when we were children and things like that.

So.

So one of the things that the mind loves is loves repetition. I mean, loves it. You know, if you really watch your thoughts, this is the same old thoughts over, over again, you know, it's just kind of dishing up the same old thing. So it loves repetition. So the way you can override a program is to put in the opposite, you know, and when you start out, you know, you feel like you're lying, you know, you'll say something like, you know, you might be really broke. Gee, I was when I was making the secrets. so you might not have any money and you're trying to instill, you know, wealth and prosperity and riches. And every time you say it, you feel a contraction in your body because you know you don't have it. But you know, truly, because I did it myself, after a while you change it, you really begin to change it and you don't quite have that contraction anymore. And then you start to see money coming in, you know, in different ways. And, and, and, or you can be given things that you were going to buy and now you don't have to buy it or. So you begin to see, you start to see signs of land, you know, is one of the great new thought writers would say, talk about a sign of land. So you start to see sign of land. Now, that's what I did in the Secret. You can do gratitude. That will turn everything around. That will make you feel good. That will get you off the negative rant. But those negative thoughts are coming from beliefs held in the subconscious mind.

Right. That's where do the beliefs stem from for most of us?

They stem mostly from our childhood conditioning.

Yeah.

Somebody's, our parents said something to us, we just swallowed it. Pork, line and zinker. You know, we're like, right, that's a belief. And, and so we take it in and, and then we have all these beliefs that, that, and you can hear, you know, if you, if you're talking to somebody like, if, if if somebody says, oh, I believe, or because we say that all the time, or somebody says, I think behind those two, behind those two statements are going to be a belief. And so the really interesting thing, they're hard to spot because you believe they're true.

They're real. Yeah.

So you don't think they're a belief. You think they're real, you know, and so they can be hard to spot. But if you start to listen to yourself, I believe or I think or especially look at the things that you have really strong opinion about. Because where you have a really strong opinion is a belief that's underneath that. So one of the things that in the latest book is that I show how to dissolve those beliefs and just really by some of the things that I've just mentioned. and you can dissolve them and you just feel free. Every time a belief goes out, you feel completely free. It's an amazing, amazing feeling. You just feel as light as a feather and actually you feel invincible. Because can you imagine, like if we have, for example, the feeling of doubt, right? Doubt and uncertainty. Now, doubt and uncertainty play a big part in most people's lives and that can be paralyzing those two things. So just imagine living a life zero doubt, zero uncertainty. I mean incredible.

How do we get to a place of not doubting ourselves?

You can because you need to know who you are. You need to know who you are so that you don't doubt yourself because the one that is doubting is the ego, the one that is doubting is the mind. It's not who we are. So then you've got to become very aware of your thoughts. That one that is doubting, the negative thoughts, they're all coming from the ego. Right? All of them. Because who you are would never have a negative thought ever, ever. Who you are would never judge who you are doesn't have, who you are is allowing and accepting. And so you, so all of those things are coming from the ego and they are not who you are. And that voice in your head that you hear, that voice that's, you know, so familiar to you and seems to know an awful lot about you and sounds like you, that voice is not you. That voice is just a program.

What was the voice that was in your head consistently pre-secret that you had to overcome that belief?

And then.

And then what's been the. The program? Because I feel like every new Evolution of us is going to be some type of thing to overcome. So has there been something you've had to overcome in the last 15 years post-secret to get to the next level?

Definitely negative thoughts. Definitely.

Before this secret, you had a lot.

Of- Before this, oh heaps, I was like everybody. I was like everybody. I was just like, oh, I was pointing out all the things that were wrong. And somehow I was kind of brought up and I think a lot of us are that you're a good person if you point out the things that are wrong, you know, you have to speak up and say, that's wrong. you know, that shouldn't be happening. And, and, and so I was kind of brought up with that, too. And so that's brought up with judgment. And that does not help us at all. Judgment. We need to put it in the trash because that does, that does not belong with us. And the one who is judging is the ego. That's, it's the ego is judging. The one that has negative thoughts is the ego. So, so I had all of that going on. You know, I had doubt, I had uncertainty, I had feelings. unworthiness. I had heaps of stress. Oh my God, heaps of stress. I was like, pre- the book, pre- secret.

Yeah.

Living on the edge, you know, I was like this with life, like white knuckles, you know, what's going to happen next, you know, something bad's going to happen and being really afraid, it's, you know, something's going to happen to somebody I love or so, I mean, I live my life like that and I think everybody does. and they just kind of keep it all squashed down, you know? But most people live their life that way. And I mean, you know, in the last year, if you've been terrified, you know, in the last year and really fearful in the last year, you know, all of that fear has been given to you as this lovely gift, you know? When you were maybe a child, and it's like, here's a whole lot of things to be fearful about. And then we go through, Fear. And I mean, it's very easy to see that there's no pandemic that is fear, a fear-based pandemic. Why do we know that? Because there are many people who are not afraid. And so if the pandemic was, you know, in the world was actually a real fear manifestation, then every single person on the planet would be fearful. And while there are a lot of people fearful, there are still a lot who are not. So that just shows you that the fear was already here with us, you know, before the pandemic came along.

Right.

Yeah.

What was the, what was the belief that you still had to overcome post secret? Because you overcame a lot to be able to create something like that. There was this incredible movement. But then were there other negative beliefs that still held you back?

Oh, yeah.

The biggest one, the biggest one was that I was abundant. that was the biggest one.

That was your limiting belief or.

Yeah, that was the one I. I had been brought up with. We can't afford it. We don't have enough, you know, and money would come into my hands. It would slip through my fingers. You know, things would break down. The universe would do all these things to get the money out of my hands.

Yeah. Yeah.

Because I had this belief that I did not have an abundant. amount of money and that I was always in struggle and that came from my parents, bless them, you know, they're beautiful. But that came from them, you know, we can't afford it and all of those things. So I was brought up with that, as many of us are. So the one that I had the biggest thing to overcome, the belief, the biggest thing to overcome was the belief in lack of money. And I knew I needed to overcome that for the secret to sweep the.

World to be able to attract and bring you.

Yeah.

Because if I didn't overcome that, how could it possibly.

Why would money come to you then?

Exactly.

Yeah. So I had to overcome it.

How did you. How did you overcome that? I mean, how do you overcome the fear of lack of the not having enough, never. I'm not worthy of money. How do we finally transition into abundance?

I did that by many, many things. I tried many things, all kinds. I was experimenting with it. So, I mean, I would just walk down the street and say, there's prosperity. Everyone breathing in prosperity. I do all these affirmations. You know, I'm breathing in prosperity with every breath I take. I am my substance is prosperity. I am abundant. I am worthy, you know? And so I would say all these affirmations. I would have them all pinned up around the apartment that I was staying in and so that I would see them and read them every day. So that was just one thing I did. Then what I would do, the biggest thing was because at the time I was in incredible debt. I was making the secret and I just didn't have the money to make it. And I started out $2 million in debt, mind you, because of a whole lot of shows that went really wrong.

And so- Because you were producing TV shows at the time.

Yeah, I was. And so, I mean, $2 million in debt makes it sound like I had a lot of money. I never had anything like that money. But the these particular movies that we're making, they ran over budget. And so I started with $2 million in debt. I remember I discovered the secret and I went to my accountant and I said, you have to do whatever it takes to keep my company afloat. I'm going to make something that's going to change the world. I'm going to make it, you keep my company going. And so, and it was like, you know, and he just said, he just said, okay. And, and so I took out, oh, my gosh, I maxed every credit card I had to the limit. I mortgage my home to the absolute limit. I took overdrafts out on my company so I could make the documentary.

Wow.

And so I had crushing debt coming in on me and I needed more money to keep making it. So it was a journey of absolute luck, you know? And the luck was just an expression of what I'd been brought up with. So I had to turn that around. One of the things I did, like the, when I would go and get used to get, then you would get your bills or accounts in the mail, you know, it wasn't all online. And so I'd go to the Maple, you know, and straight away my stomach, my stomach would like, and if anybody's been in that situation where you just don't have enough money and you've got all these bills, it's a horrible feeling, you know? and my whole body would contract and I would know that is attracting a lack of money and that's not attracting abundance. So I used to do this thing whereby I would do gratitude and I would listen to music and I would do all of as many things as I could until I felt really, really good. And I would just say to myself, I am abundant and nothing would object, no thought would object. And I'm like, right, now's the time to open the mail, right? I'm feeling really, really good. And so then I would open the bills and I would look at each one as though it was a check. I would imagine it's a check, not a bill.

So you played a game in your mind and you're like, I put it in my mind.

It's $100,000.

And I would go, wow, look at.

All the checks I got today.

And so I would do that, you know, and then I'd open them up and I'd be like, wow, $160 check and, you know, a $2,300 check. And then I felt like it wasn't, I would add them all up and that's how much I received today. And then I would think, you know what? I need to be receiving more money than that. So I would add zeros to the bills. And I would pretend that they were, instead of $160, it was $16,000 check that was coming to me. And so it added all up and I received all this money. So that was one of the other games that I played. And then I did something quite radical. It was an experiment and test and all of these things I did so that I could tell what worked and what would work for people. And so I thought, what's the way that I can feel really good about money? Because when you don't have enough, it's really hard to feel good about money. Really hard. Really hard. And so I thought, what's the one way that I can feel good about money? Okay. the way that I can feel good about money is if I give some away. And so what I- well, what about.

If you have no money to give away?

I took it out on my credit card.

Wow.

I took out these $20 bills on my credit card. I think I could access $100 or something. So I took out all of these $20 bills and I thought, Right, I'm going to walk down the street and I said to the universe, show me who to give it to. And so I would walk down the street and I was looking at everybody's faces. And I don't know if you've ever done that in your life is just so silently walk down a street and look at people's faces like with a heart wide open. And I was just melting looking at all these people's faces. And then it was just amazing because the universe would just show me who to give it to. Like these kids walked out of a store and they're like counting them I don't have enough to get that, you know, they wanted to get something in the store. And so just, you know, gave them $20 and they're like, thanks lady, and ran back in the store to get, you know, the ice creams or whatever they wanted. And it was an ice cream store, I think they were out the front of. And so, yeah, I just went down the street giving away this money.

And.

In fact, there were two, I think there was two or one $20 note that It just like stopped. It wasn't clear anymore who to give it to. And so I just stopped. Do you know that that was on a Friday and on the Monday I received $25,000 in my account from a place that I never, ever, ever could have expected.

Wow.

Yeah. It's so powerful.

Right?

It's crazy. Was there any other tests or games that you tried to, you know, change your thoughts and play with your mind to start seeing yourself as abundant and in profit?

Yeah, I did. I did lists of all of the things that I was going to, all the things I was going to buy, you know, when the money came in. So I did all of these lists, and I imagined that I had those things already. And, yeah. And I wanted, I remember it was like, I want a house on the ocean. I really went all out. You know, that was just some list. One of the things I remember is that I'd always wanted a range rover. of my life. And that was just beyond anything I could afford. And especially in Australia, like, there were crazy prices, so. But still, I put it on the list and I put all these things on the list. But, you know, interestingly enough, like, I did that because that was a way to turn money around. But when the secret got released, I didn't care about any of it because. And I didn't even care. All that mattered was that I had got it out into the world, and now it was in the world. It could never be taken away. and that is what mattered to me more than anything is that that was going to get into people's hands. And so, but still, I have to tell you, got all the things on the list. You know, there's amazing views out here of the ocean. I ended up by getting a Range Rover. And so, yeah, but I did, I did a lot of practices, and I have shared those practices in a lot of the books. And also, we created an app, which was the secret to money. And so there are a lot of the practices. that I put in that app. And I was just dedicated.

Wow.

Because I knew this was a big thing for people and, and that if I can do it, anyone can do it.

Yeah.

And you just, all you have to do is you keep doing it until you do not feel any more lack anymore, until there are no more thoughts coming up saying, oh, no, you broke, you know, thoughts where you're even looking at the money going out with larger contractions.

I personally, Gabby Bernstein, I believe that we all have guides, ancestors, family members, teachers, beings of light beings, energy beings that are supporting us in a form that is able to step in, able to channel through us when we write books, able to be there in those darkest moments, pick us up off the floor. and hold us in discomfort and guide us to business opportunities or babies or whatever it is that we're looking for. And it's always available to us, that guidance, but we just, we cut it off, we block it. Why do we block the guidance? Fear is the reason we block it.

Fear.

Fear of what? It's not even fear, it's that false based perception that we've built up around ourselves from those traumatic events, right? So we have these traumatic events early in life, and they continue to build and build and build. We build up a world of false perceptions. I am this body. I am Gabbie Bernstein. I am Lewis Howes.

I've got the school of great teachers. People are out to get me.

I can't trust people. We create these beliefs. And you believe you're separate from others. You believe you're better than or less than or not good enough. And all those stories, all those false pretenses are what many spiritual practices call the ego, right? And that fear-based perception of yourself is misaligned with God, with love, with spirit, with angels, with guides. And so this book is all about how to get back into alignment so that you can hear that guidance and receive that guidance and be a channel for inspiration. And when you clear and undo those patterns of fear and start to claim the pattern of love, that's when you are hooked up Super Attractor.

Unstoppable.

Unstoppable. Invisible doors open for you. It doesn't matter how low you are when you're starting this, you will go way further than you could possibly have imagined. And I am standing behind that subtitle, Methods for Manifesting a Life Beyond youd Wildest Dreams. Standing behind it.

I love that. What's the difference between spiritual guides or guides and Intuition.

You could call it the same thing.

Your guides are your bridge from your fear-based thoughts back to your love, right? So if you pray and say, God, guide, higher self, angels, whatever it is. I give this to you.

Figure it out, right?

I don't know how I'm gonna get through this time, but yeah, I give it to you. That's how we surrender. People are like, I don't know how to surrender. I don't want to let it go. I don't know how to through prayer. okay? Prayer is the conduit. And then when we say that prayer or that intention, whatever you want to call it, and we allow ourselves to give it over to a higher power of our own understanding, a guide, God, Spirit, Grandma, whoever, then we're taking that difficult experience, we're handing it over, and then we relax.

Yeah.

Because we think, okay, it's not on my shoulders anymore.

It's like taking our ego out of our self and putting it over here.

And saying, somebody else is going to help me. do this and then their job is to pay attention. What's going to show up for us? And so pay attention.

How do we pay attention?

Just be aware, stay calm, and stay chill, right? And be conscious of how things start to speed up or the synchronicities that begin to happen around you. Or if you are like, you know, guides, I want to see a sign and you're like, I need butterflies and butterflies are everywhere. I'm getting thousands and thousands of emails from readers that are reading this book in the last two weeks it's been out. And they're just like, Gabby, every single sign I've asked for is coming to me. And like it just speeds up. Ask for a sign today. If you're having a difficult experience, say guides, what would your sign be? Don't think, just say it.

Just say it, don't think.

Oh, the sign is like a pumpkin or anything.

An eagle.

Eagle is your sign. That's a good one. It's strong.

Yeah.

See how everybody How he answered that, that's gonna be the first thing that comes to mind. And now if there's an issue that's happening in your life, just say to yourself silently today at this end of this podcast, just say, thank you, guides, thank you, universe, whatever you believe in, right? For showing me my eagle to remind me that I'm on the right path.

So ask for the sign, the eagle.

Thank you for revealing my eagle. Thank you for revealing it before I see the eagle. Yeah, thank you for revealing my eagle.

To remind me that I am being guided. Okay.

Okay.

And the eagle will mean whatever I give the meaning to, whether it's to.

Make a decision on something or... It's just being guided in general or if it's being guided towards that job or that healing or that whatever, right? Sometimes I'll use a sign like, am I supposed to take this deal? And I don't know what to do. And I'm feeling so uncomfortable about it. And I'll say, Show me a sign, and I'll get this. And the thing is, if you don't get your sign, that's a sign too. But you absolutely will get your sign if you're asking to should be shown that you're being guided 100% you're gonna get your sign. Okay.

Who is gonna text me later everybody?

It's on the eagle!

My eagle just sent me a photo, like some massive eagle.

So give me an example for people.

It could be an eagle like in a photo or an eagle, you know, again. Any image of an eagle. Not some eagle sitting on my window, which would be amazing if that happened. Could be that too. So let's give an practical example for someone. Say someone says, there's a, a female listening or a male listening and saying, okay, is this... Should I go on a date with this person?

A second date with this person, right?

Just something small. Show me my sign. Show me my sign. And what if you don't see and.

The sign is to reveal that you're supposed to go on this date or to give you some information. And if you don't get the sign, if you don't get the sign then and you decide to go on the date anyway, it's okay. There's still some learning in that. Yeah. There might be not, there have been times where I've done things that I.

Didn'T get my sign and they didn't work out.

Necessarily, but I still learned something from the experience.

Has there ever been a time where you didn't see a sign and it did work out? Maybe you saw the sign later or something.

It worked out in a different way.

Yeah. Right.

So like if I was like, I need a sign about this situation and I didn't get the sign, oh, here's an example from the book. So I was my two weeks before I was meant to conceive, my doctor who was like a very conservative, Yale-trained physician in my little tiny country town was like, you're turning, I just turned 39. I was 38 when I was pregnant and I just turned 39. So he considered me 40. I was like, dude, I was 38 a week ago and now I'm fucking 40. So he makes me 40. And he's like, we believe that you need to deliver 40 to 40, 40 weeks when you're 40 years old. And I was resisting and resisting and I was like, I'm not 40 and I don't want to be induced. I don't want to force the baby out. I don't want to have that kind of thing. And I, so I was so torn up because he was so nervous and that was infiltrating my fear, my trauma. Yeah. And so I was in his office and I was like, okay, universe, I can't make a decision. I need a sign. And so I said, show me a sign if following this path is the right move. And he walked in the door and he was wearing this necktie. And I said, Howie, what's on your Tie and he said, it's a, it's a cardinal. And I said, okay, in my head, I'm like, that's my sign. It's a cardinal. And so the next day, I had to make a decision if I wanted to get booked. So I didn't have an opportunity to see my cardinal before I made that, well, that decision, because I had to book him in the schedule. And he was leaving the next week. It was, it was a mess. So I made the decision without seeing the sign. I said, okay, to be induced to schedule an induction. Wow. It's not what I wanted. And so I made that decision. I was in my bath, I texted my girlfriend, I said, okay, I'm gonna be induced. This is happening. And she writes back to me, that's a great decision. I feel really good about it. And I know it's good for you because I saw a cardinal land on my window just now.

Cardinal Landino. No way.

Did you tell her the sign? She had no idea about the sign. Wow. But here's the thing. So I got my cardinal. It gave me the guidance that was on the right path. I was meant to be induced on a Wednesday. on a Monday, I'm lying in my bed and I'm finishing the finishing touches of the book because I wanted to deliver the book before I delivered the baby. So, I stand up to go to the bathroom and my water breaks. No way.

And here I am and I have.

The most epic Beyonce birth. Like, there was nobody at the hospital. I had like rolling hills out my window and like, I was the only one birthing in the maternity ward.

Oh my gosh.

And I had, you know, the sunset at So the whole point is, is that my sign was saying, yeah, you're on the right track. Make the decision so that I could relax. Because if I hadn't made that decision, I wouldn't have relaxed. My water wouldn't have broke because I would have been too freaked out and tense and everything worked out.

Wow.

Do you see what I'm saying here? Yeah, of course. If you don't see your sign, that's still guidance.

And then, you know, if you get your sign, even if it's something you didn't want, you know? What has been the biggest lesson of motherhood? that you were unexpectedly, because you have lots of friends who are mothers.

Yeah, I had no idea.

You have so many fans of yours who are moms that you speak to all the time, and maybe you thought you knew what they were going through, or you could speak into some of their challenges, but what have you really learned? Maybe three biggest lessons so far about motherhood and what moms experience in the first year of motherhood.

So in terms of what moms experience and what happens, and I think my son has taught me, has given me the greatest gift of healing I could ever have imagined. Because as soon as I became pregnant, what happens for women is all your shit comes up and for men too. You know, when you're about to bring life into the world and be responsible for that, your darkest demons start to come to the surface and so many people just push it down, push it down, push it down. And so I don't push things down. I was like, let's go. Okay, I'm ready. I'm willing. Let's go for this. And so I, you know, I've worked on it along the way and then the postpartum, and that gave me even a greater step of healing. So his presence in my life has already put me on a massive healing path. I've had fast-forward healing in the last year and a half. So that I'm grateful. My son has taught me that.

I.

Am going to make my highest priority in life to honor his feelings. People keep asking me, what's your parenting advice? I'm like, look, I've been doing this for 10 months, but I can tell you this. Honor their feelings. Imagine that was something that we experienced.

Amazing.

I mean, you'd be a different person. I'd be a different person. And if we could honor any human's feelings, any human being, particularly a child. And then I guess the third thing that I've learned as a mother, there's so much, but is that, They have their own guides. They have their own, they're not, oh this is big. He is not my son Oliver Rocklin. He is not, you know, the son to Zach, the son to Gabby. He is his own spirit having a human experience. And he is a person. He's not a baby.

Wow. And you're just here to guide him. You're here to...

I am in an archetypal position to be a guide and a love and of support for him. But I find myself often being like, my baby, so cute. My baby, my baby. And then I have to stop myself and say, Oliver, not my baby. He's not my baby. He's him.

Wow. So when we reflect our judgment on someone else, we don't like something, we're angry at them, we're pissed off at them, whatever it is, how can we shift that to see the good in them?

Read Judgment Detox.

Okay.

Because I'm sitting sometimes I'm just like, yeah, I wrote a book about it. Yeah, exactly. I get it. But I'll answer your question fully right now, which is like, when we are in judgment of somebody else, what's happening is that we're projecting onto them our own wounds. And so the second step of judgment detox is to, well, the first step.

Is to heal your wounds. Is to honor your wounds. Yeah, of course.

Yeah.

It's so hard, you know?

So hard to not judge other people, isn't it? It gets a lot of It's easier when you practice it. It's helped me so much. And do I not judge all the time? Of course I still judge, but when I judge, I don't believe in it.

And I get out of it quickly.

So what do you say when you're judging someone else? I witness my judgment without judgment, step one. I honor the wound. Okay, oh, I'm judging them because I'm feeling insecure, or I'm judging them because they're triggering something, right? And then I continue on the journey of the judgment detox, which, you know, just releasing and and forgiving and seeing someone for the first time, choosing to see them through the lens of love. It's a fabulous book.

See them through a lens of love.

Yeah.

Get that book too. What is, do you think, is your greatest accomplishment in 40 years of life?

My greatest accomplishment in 39 years, two weeks away from 40... Don't age me. I can't believe I'm 40. Oh my God. So my greatest accomplishment is the freedom I'm feeling right now today here with you is my greatest accomplishment. Recovering from trauma is my greatest accomplishment. It will be the best contribution I can give to the world. I am going to help people because even just being in this state of freedom will help people watching because they will see what they are capable of.

Yeah, that's powerful. And do you feel like you'll be able to make a bigger impact in the world by being a mother? Or...

I've already, yeah. So I've noticed myself in my talks, I would always have a really good boundary, which you have to have, as you know, when we do the work we do. Because if I'm gonna get up and answer questions, people, a lot of my audience is coming up being like, I have a brain injury or I'm suicidal or, you know, and I have to hold them in their transformation, but not take it on. But as a mother now, I don't feel that I'm taking it on, but I have a way deeper level of compassion for people that I've never had before.

Because you're experiencing all this.

I'm seeing their innocent child in them. I don't see them as an adult who hasn't taken care of themselves or as an adult who's done stupid things. I see them as a wounded child and all I want to do is just hold them into love. And that's, I mean, even in one of my talks, this one woman was so wounded and I actually went as far as asking her to come up so I could just hug her. And that is so against everything I've ever I've ever done in my career. Why? I would never, like, touch someone or, you know, have it. It doesn't mean that I wouldn't hug somebody, like, casually, but I held her like an arm hug. You know what I mean? I was like, this is. And I kept holding her. I said, you're safe, you're safe, you're safe. And I don't know what came over me. The other thing that's happening is I'm becoming more unapologetic about my mediumship. So we're all mediums. We all have the ability to listen to Spirit and let. But I can, you know, I've, throughout my life, have always heard messages, and, you know, now I'm just, like, giving to people. And I always have channeled throughout my talking, but now where normally I would say, you know, okay, this is the guidance. If I'm hearing it as a guide, I'll say, what I'm hearing for you is this.

And I'll deliver it in a different way. Yeah, yeah. So people can receive it, not if they don't believe in some type of medium stuff.

They can, they can. Sometimes I'll just tell them, like, I think, you know, your grandmother is telling me.

Tim's telling you this. Yeah, sometimes. Not always. I've never had a, someone who calls himself a medium that this practice on the show. I've been pitched like different mediums to come on and I've always been kind of resistant. But lately, I'm like, you know what? I think it'd be a fun experience. -Oh, yeah.

-Is there someone that you think is like the best at what they do? -There's so many. I mean, yeah. Let's talk offline. I can sit here and tell you five or six different names and I don't want to offend anybody out there. I know a lot of mediums.

I don't want that one being like, why didn't you say me on Louis' house? So, I'll give you some suggestions. Yeah. Great. All good though. That'd be fun. What do you think is missing from you to get to the next level in your life? Whatever that looks like for you. What's missing?

There's a little bit more trauma work that I've gotta face. It's not missing though. It's in perfect time.

Around what? What's the trauma around?

Just a lot of the sexual trauma, the shame around the sexual trauma.

You talked about it on our show. a couple years ago, a couple years ago. And I know you've been doing a lot of work over the last few years with it, but do you feel like you're fully, you're not fully healed with those things yet? I don't think I am either. Even though I talk about it for.

The last six years, you're more healed than ever before.

But every, I'm at peace a lot.

About it, but there's still little triggers.

Yeah. EMDR.

Yes. I keep hearing that. I really recommend it to you.

Okay. I'll try that.

Yeah.

Where do you think you'll be once you have that? final healing.

Freedom is my end game, right? I hope to live for a long, long time feeling free. I did talk with Deepak Chopra yesterday and I was on the plane with him coming here and we were chatting about, you know, I was like, do you feel triggered or triggered? He's like, not at all. With nothing all the time. And it's because of his practice. It's because of his devotion to his practice. So that's, I'm getting closer and closer to that. It doesn't mean I'll be enlightened. It doesn't mean I'll have bad experience. I won't have bad experiences. I mean, I won't be a human, but that I can feel free even when things are tough.

What do you think it is that he has or people like him have that allow them to have zero connection to or not allow the ego to affect them in a triggering way and a reactive defensive positive way, guarded when maybe something bad happens to him. Maybe a business deal.

He's the person who grew up being taught that the divine is the direction that, you know, God was the, I don't want to use language that's not his, but he had a very spiritual upbringing. So it was a foundational experience for him. And he's devoted his life to being at ease. And meditate, he's up very early, meditates for two hours, I think, in the morning. And, you know, I think it's. It's his devotion and commitment that's let.

Let him be that way. Isn't it amazing that when I. When I am consistent with my meditation practice, I feel like I'm unstoppable. Like, the longer I meditate, I feel like I see. It's like the Matrix.

You'll see someone saying something to you and see someone cut you off. You become a super attractive. This is what the whole book is about, baby. Is that the more we practice being in alignment. the more that unstoppable experience occurs. But when we are just living out of alignment, we feel out of alignment.

That's it.

Things don't work.

That's it.

We're pushing.

What do you think is missing from your point of view as a friend to me? What's missing in my life to help me attract more of good things that I want?

I think there's a little more trauma work to do. I can feel it and you said it a few times. And so, let me hold your hand while I say this because I love you so much. and I will help you if you need any guidance and support just to listen and be there for you because you have the potential for that same freedom that I'm talking about now. We all do, but particularly you're right there, but there's shame and there's places to go to that I think you're ready to go now. And that it hasn't been, there's been no step along the way that's been an accident. It's all been perfect order for you and it's all been unfolding perfectly and humbling moments and difficult times and things that come up only to get you to the place where you're ready to crack open more and face some of the darkest stuff. And you need to do that with a, so I'm hearing that you need to do that with a facilitator that you trust, someone that you feel safe with, and someone that will really give you that hold that space for you to go to the places that scare you.

Sounds good, I'm in.

Because you're doing really big shit in the world. You know, big stuff, big work, and it's gonna be massive the more free you become.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm excited. I'm excited to continue to work.

I'm really proud of you because the fact that you even asked that question is so major because it means you're willing. Yeah, definitely. I'm so proud.

I love you so much.

Thank you.

I love you. Yeah, and you said the first step is willingness.

And what?

You said willingness is the key for something before in one of our interviews.

Willingness is the catalyst for change because The moment that we become willing, it's like we invite the next right action. We invite God into our life to show us where to go and what to do. The willingness that you've developed over your life over the last 36 years got you into this seat right now with me while we're talking about things that we've both been through for you to say what's next. And for me to honestly and authentically say, this is what I think is next. Yeah, okay.

Okay, so I trust you.

I trust you.

That's your willingness. When you're feeling frustration, When you're feeling impatient, when you're feeling resentment, you are stepping on the gas pedal and you're stepping on the brake at the same time. And the heart is pumping against the closed system and it causes an erratic beat. It becomes incoherent. And energy literally leaves the heart. Now, you no longer believe in your future. You can't put your heart into your future. You can't trust the outcome because there's no energy there. It's being used and consumed somewhere else, so energy is leaving the brain as well. But once energy starts to move into the heart, we've seen this so many times, and it starts to beat in this rhythm, like banging a drum or dropping a pebble in water, pebble after pebble. The heart begins to create a wave of energy right to the brain, like taking a big sheet and going like that. And then all of a sudden you see this wave and the brain gets this rush of energy and that Change in brain wave patterns, that change, that wave is carrying information and the person starts to get a very clear idea. They see their future very clearly. Now that energy is causing them to move into very coherent alpha brain wave patterns which is the state of creation. This is when you no longer hear the voice in your head that's talking to you that you listen to and believe is the truth.

I'm not good enough.

Yeah, whatever that is. That's called the default mode. It suppresses the default mode network and the next thing you know, you start seeing in pictures and images. You start dreaming and that's the imagination. That's the creative state. So now you start naturally imagining the heart is the creative center. We gotta put our heart into our future. It better be open and activated. So now when you start falling in love with your future, oxytocin is released in the brain and in the heart. Oxytocin signals nitric oxide. Nitric oxide signals another chemical called endothelial derived relaxing factor. And just like when your sexual organs get filled with blood because you're aroused, the same thing happens here as it would happen somewhere else and literally the arteries in the heart and lungs engorge and now your heart feels full and it's thumping in order and your in the present moment. Now once that happens and it's beating in rhythm, the heart produces an external magnetic field up to three meters wide. Now in survival you're drawing from the field and turning into chemistry. When you get energy in the heart it's causing a change in the brain and all of a sudden it's resetting the baseline for trauma and now here you have a magnetic field. Now the heart is your magnet. It is the center of creation and now that that energy is frequency and frequency carries information and you can lay the thought of your new relationship on that energy because it's consistent with it. You cannot lay the thought of your new relationship in need. That's a different energy.

What do you mean in need?

Well, if you're feeling needing someone to love me, that's a different frequency. That's a different energy.

What happens when you're in a need state, as opposed to an attraction state.

Well, you're in lack. So now you're trying, you're grasping, you're controlling, you're forcing, you're trying to predict, you're overthinking, overanalyzing, and that's how people live their relationships. So then if you are going to prepare your brain and body for a new relationship, then you would have to become love completely every day and that signal then that you're sending out into the field can carry the thought of your health, your wealth, your relationship or whatever. But here's the cool part. When the heart is activated like that and you feel so whole, so in love with life, so satisfied in the moment, so exuberant that it's impossible to want. Now you're no longer in lack. Now you're so whole that you will magnetize wholeness in your life. The person who who's the person that fits the mold energetically that would be the same as you and yet complement you so that the two can become one, right? And then instead of in contrast, in union, you exchange information equal to that emotional state. In other words, people use each other to reaffirm their dependence on certain emotions. You have certain people you complain with about politics or whatever, they complain back about their lives and you use each other to reaffirm, you know, some type.

Of belief or something.

Belief about life emotionally. You have emotional agreements on things. Well, that emotion is energy and energy is frequency and frequency carries information. So you share the same energy, you share the same information, but that's what people do in their lives. But now in a true loving relationship, when you're truly in your heart, then the question is what would love do in the relationship? And when your heart is open, it's no longer about you. It's about how I feel so amazing with you. I feel even more amazing, but without you, I'm still whole. And so now I'm no longer in need or lack. And so now when we get together and our fields interfere, When they start interfering, now the amplitude gets way higher. There's way more energy. And now, I mean, I'm all about all seven centers of the body lining up. All of them. And we're here in a body. Let's enjoy it all, but come from love. And so now your heart is so open that you can't do anything else but give. You feel so amazing. You're so happy with yourself, so happy with your life, so happy with what you have, you want other people to feel the same way. And you say, Here, take that. And when you give now, guess what happens? You release more oxytocin, more nitric oxide, and more of those chemicals that cause the heart to swell even more. Then all of a sudden, your immune system gets stronger, and all of a sudden, your body starts feeling better. You start having more energy, and now the constructive interference between two people that are coming together in wholeness and no longer dependence or lack or separation or need is a different game. So then what they do to protect, to nurture, to grow, to evolve that love is one of the most important things that they have. Not because they're doing it out of obligation or because they're married or whatever. It's just they not do it. We see people, we had somebody scan the other day in our workshop in profoundly high amounts of gamma. She can do it on command. And there's an incredible arousal that takes place that goes along with these high brain frequencies that you can only describe as ecstasy or bliss. Now you're getting that ecstasy and bliss not from anyone or anything out there. No drug, no person, no football game, no shopping spree is doing that. It's somehow it's coming from within. Like what is that connection that you have? And so one of the scientists said to this woman, How do you do that? You know what she said? I have difficulty not doing it. I can't not do it when I'm in a real... It's too... When I'm doing this, it's too good. So now that is could be a constant feeling in your life. So now, what, love? Independent of anyone or anything, it's coming from within you. Okay? So think about this.

Whether you're in a relationship or single.

It doesn't matter. You're whole. Your love is not wavering. It's constant, right? So now imagine having this feeling and when oxytocin is released, what most what most people don't know is that it seeps into the amygdala and there's certain survival emotions in the amygdala. Fear and anxiety, aggression and anger, pain and suffering. And it literally shuts the lights out in those circuits in the amygdala. And there's only one thing left, love and joy, right? So now this person is suppressing the survival centers, resetting the baseline of the past, how they perceive of the past. And now the research on oxytocin shows that when you have just a slight level of increase, and our research shows our students are way outside of normal, that it's impossible to hold a grudge. You know why? Because the feeling feels so good. Why would you judge another person or why would you react to some condition and lose that feeling? You figure it out. really fast. So this birth of unconditional love really says, I'm in love with myself, my connection to some divine intelligence within me. And because I'm so in love with life and with myself, I'm looking at life through the lens of love, which means I'm going to allow you to be whoever you want around me. I don't really... I'm no longer...

I'm not a reaction.

I'm not a reaction because I've overcome my fear, I've overcome my anger, and now I'm ready for love. And now that relationship that you have, if you find that equal, that's a needle in the haystack because now it's a vibrational match. And so as long as you're evolving, as long as I'm evolving, as long as we're sharing the same ideals, as long as we're working together, as long as we have our independence, and as long as we come together, and we bring our best and I say to you, how was your day? I mean, what did you learn? Or let's start our day. So how are you going to be today? Come on, let's just support each other. So what are the programs you're going to stay away from? Are you going to rush? You know, what did you do yesterday that you want to improve today? How can I support you? How can I love you in that? You want to text at noon? What do you need? And then how am I going to be? Okay, tell me how you're going to vocalize it, articulate it so that Now I understand your intention and I can support that's good. And so then when the person can articulate it, what are they doing? They're rehearsing in their mind who they're going to be and so now they're becoming conscious of that future. And then they have to work on staying conscious of their unconscious programs and by articulating that they're going to not let those thoughts slip by as well. So then now you have two people in evolution. It's no longer about all the other things. It's not about the money, it's not about the sex. It's not about the weight. It's not about the diet. Those are all things that we already know. This is something else. This is a whole other level where when you exchange and evolve on this level, it's the most important thing because now you see that person as a mirror. Oh my God. She did amazing. I'm in love with her. I admire her. Wow, she's got it going on. She executed today. She got her behaviors to match her intentions and I want to celebrate her like wow, I'm in awe. That to me, you don't work on that. You work on you. Everybody works on themselves and then they bring their best. And if they're not at their best, excuse yourself and get back to your best. And if you tell me it's that person or that circumstance, we went back to the unconscious program of being a victim, nothing wrong with that. Nothing wrong with reacting. But the next question is how long?

I'm gonna stay in this mode.

Right, or do you want help getting out? Right, so I think that when you start feeling those elevated emotions and your energy is synchronized, right? And you got a Wi-Fi signal. You got a signal.

You're connected, you're 5G, you're connected.

And what are you connected in? In this sense of wholeness, this sense of love, the sense of joy, this satisfaction with yourself and your life. And when I watch this, Louis, I mean, people come to our events for all kinds of reasons. Some people come for health, some people come for wealth, some people come for relationships. It's really funny and they show up angry people. They're angry with themselves. When they're angry with themselves, they'll be impatient and angry with others. People who are unhappy with themselves will punish other people so that they can feel their unhappiness.

Or is it to get their anger out or is it why?

No, because that's who they are. That's the emotion that's driving their behaviors. People who are in love with themselves will find love in others. People who are happy with themselves will find something that they can connect with. They won't see all the flaws. They'll see some part of them that they want to enjoy. So if you're in a relationship and you've scrubbed the cupboard and you've taken out all those skeletons and you've looked at them and you said, I don't want to bring this into my relationship. I don't want my insecurity to be there. I don't want my fear to be there. I don't want my judgment to be there. I don't want my emotions from other relationships to be there. So let me finish this. In other words, if you want love in your life and your future, then you better take care of your frustration because you can't bring that there. You got to leave it. So then you may say to me, well it's because that person and this emotion from 15 years ago, my ex makes me feel frustrated. Let me tell you something. The only reason that you're thinking about your ex is because you're still in frustration. You overcome frustration. You look back at your ex and you'll be like, I wish them well. I'm not connected to my past any longer. So cleaning the cupboards and getting down to those thoughts that slip by people's awareness all the time. Their behaviors, they complain, they make excuses, they say it'll never happen. What do they do? And the emotions that keep them connected to their past, they won't even see that person. They'll walk right past their future relationship. They'll never recognize that person because they're looking at their future through the neurology and the chemistry of their past. And the brain only learns by only we only see reality based on pattern recognition. I memorize your face. Now I know Lewis. And if the pattern matches, I know. But if you're creating a future and you're not clear on that future and you want all these things, but you haven't addressed all those circuits and behaviors and emotions and chemicals of the past, you won't recognize the pattern. You'll walk right past the relationship. You'll never see it. So I think that there's the preparation for the relationship, the overcoming and overcoming and overcoming and overcoming and overcoming and becoming all of a sudden now says, I am worthy. And the universe only gives us what we think we're worthy of receiving. So when you're worthy to receive, It's not going to be on match.com when you're looking at body parts and whatever else. This is going to be like kaching, energy kaching.

Wow.

Like that came out of nowhere because when you're in survival and you're in separation and you're in lack and you're forcing and controlling and trying to predict outcomes, you're matter trying to change matter. And of course it's going to take time for this to happen because you're creating a three-dimensional reality and everything in three-dimensional reality takes time. But when you're creating from the heart with a coherent brain and a coherent heart and you've got that 5G Wi-Fi signal, it's not like you go anywhere now. The experiences are coming to you. You're drawing the event to you. So we spend a lot of time bonding with our future emotionally. I have colleagues of mine who look at our our data on oxytocin and they're like, listen, oxytocin levels go up during, you know, when I'm in a relationship, the honeymoon stage of relationship and monogamy is created because of those chemicals or a female mammal is bonding with our offspring. That's exactly right. I want our people, our students to bond and fall in love with their future just like they do with somebody else. And when you're bonded to your future, no person, no circumstance, no thing is going to remove you from it. So then if you fall from grace during the day, then the next question is, what person, what circumstance caused me to disconnect from my love in the future? And let me rehearse in my mind if I have that same circumstance, how I'm going to overcome it. And now you're worthy of love. It's no longer the person or the event. It's just you're doing what it takes to stay in the emotion of your future. Your body is aligned. emotionally to that future. So great doing it with a meditation. That's easy. But now the real game is open your eyes. Open your eyes.

Life is happening.

Open your eyes and be in the initiation of life and stay in that place and just know that your future is going to happen. So being able to activate the heart and breathe in there and get the body out of survival and start working with it like it feels safe enough to create. Once energy makes it here, you're going to get some really good ideas. You're gonna see things you never thought of seeing, you're gonna feel things you never thought you'd feel, and the images that you're creating, what are they doing? The thoughts that you're creating, they're making.

More of those chemicals. In the game of life, whether it's health, wealth, relationships, career, business, spirituality, fun experiences, you have to decide what level of the game do I want to play at? Is it the grade school level, the kindergarten level, the high school level, the university level, the pro level? Because each one of those levels requires a totally different mindset, and totally different skill set. They're building blocks on each other but if you are extremely talented but you're not prepared to practice and rehearse and drill and fall and fail forward to the next attempt, you will never make it as a pro. You will never make it as a pro business person. You'll never make it as a pro husband or wife or athlete or musician. You just never will. So just get used to that if you're not prepared to pay the price. if you are prepared to pay the price and you have the aptitude and the talent, now we're talking about there's some real potential here. And what we don't know is, you know, what's in your heart? Like what is the fire that stirs you that you wake up saying, I will do this even when I don't feel like it. I will do whatever it takes to overcome my temptation for mediocrity, my temptation for excuses, my temptation for reasons and circumstances to hold me back. I won't allow those to be in my way. And if you have that within you, you'll achieve whatever you choose. And so the question you asked before is how do you develop that? Start small. Yeah. Start small. So if you don't have discipline, show to your show yourself that you can give yourself one command and one follow through. So you know what? Right now I'm going to get up, I'm going to do two push-ups right now. Not, not like later.

Now.

Can you give yourself a simple command? One sit up. Right now, I'm going to go get a glass of water. You start with something ridiculous. I learned many years ago, reduce it to the ridiculous. So if I reduce it to the ridiculous, and I start that, I said.

Can you do that?

Great.

Will you? Because that's the difference right there is that's the razor's edge.

The people who can.

Will you?

Will you?

Great.

When? Now.

Now.

Right? So if you develop that skill and specifically from a brain plasticity, a neuroplasticity perspective, as soon as you do that, you give yourself a command and you take the action, you have just created a neural pattern that you can give yourself a command and take action. Now that may be just be one time. Well, what if you did that every hour by putting a little bell on your computer? And every hour, like if my computer was open, I'd have every hour it would say, It's 12 o'clock, it's 1 o'clock. And I take 60 seconds just to be in control of my mind. 60 seconds, I don't care where I am. Stop, take six breaths, just get centered. Am I on track? Am I off track? Am I doing something I shouldn't be doing versus a high impact activity that I need to be doing? Every hour I've trained myself to just reset. I didn't always do that. So I just started with One a day, then two, then three. Then it was working so well, I said, great, let's do this every hour. But more importantly is as soon as you become the person who believes in themselves, you see, every thing you do or don't do leaves an imprint on your self-worth and self-esteem scale. And you know it.

Absolutely.

You know it.

Every time you have that cake or that cookie, Right. Either believe in yourself or you don't believe in yourself.

Right.

Every time you're voting with every decision, you're disqualifying with every negative belief, you're qualifying with every positive. Same with behaviors. So you start getting aware of, am I qualifying myself to move forward or am I disqualifying myself through what I say I want and what I do or don't do over and over and over again because thought patterns become emotional patterns, which become behavioral patterns. And our brains pick up on our thought, emotional and behavioral patterns and says, Hey, you know what? You've done that one enough. I'm just going to make that automatic for you. So all of a sudden, you know, if you're a person has lots of positive thoughts, but you suck at taking action, your brain says, Let me make that a permanent pattern for you. You don't have to think about it anymore. But I'm also that's going to create some neural tension and I'm going to make you pissed off at yourself now. Now you're going to start talking to yourself about how you don't want to not take action but you're still taking action. And this is where we have this conscious non-conscious ping pong match going on all the time. Complex. Yeah. It's actually complex but it's actually pretty easy to.

So someone's listening right now and they're thinking, you know, there's a lot of things I want, you know, I want to get out of this relationship or I want the relationship, I want to have a better health, I want to have more money, whatever it may be. And they've been saying that for years and they feel like they've been consuming all the information they need to have, but they haven't been able to take action. Maybe because their why isn't powerful enough, what would you say should be their first step?

Well, the first step is to take one thing. I'm going to go back to one thing.

Yeah.

And say, great, let me move one thing forward. Why? Because that just changes the trajectory of of the same pattern repeating itself. And as soon as you interrupt a pattern and then you repeatedly interrupt the pattern, it's like taking a detour. And as soon as you take a detour one day, you're like, okay, that was okay. But you tended, your tendency is to want to go back to what's comfortable. But if you take the detour two days, six days, seven days, we know from a neuroscience perspective, it takes about 66 days to create a solid enough neural pattern that it'll go from conscious effort and thinking about it to a non-conscious pattern that has the beginnings of automaticity happening without your involvement. You're just doing it. And so for me, what I do and for myself is I, whenever I want to change something, whether it's a habit, whether it's a thought or emotion or behavior, I say, I'm gonna work on this for 100 days. Not 30 days, not 21 days, not 66, which is right around there. I say 100 days. And then I focus all of my energy just on that one thing for 100 days. Why?

Can you give an example of something you've done? Sugar.

Sugar. I'm a sugar.

Me too.

I'm a sugar. Like if he was an alcoholic, I'm a sugaraholic.

Me too. It's so bad.

Yeah, so I go like, you a week, two weeks, no sugar. Then a month, I eat dessert every night. 90 days.

Me too.

Like a cake and cookie and five of them a day. And then the same way, I can.

Be very disciplined, but it's either way.

Yeah, I'm an extremist as well. So it's all or nothing?

Higher off.

It's like no in between.

You have one, you have a ten.

Yeah, I don't have one cookie. If there's only one cookie, I go, no, I have like six or seven more. My cookie bills at hotels are $21, not three.

So I keep replenishing.

So you take one thing, just one thing that you know may be a little challenging.

100 days.

100 days, just 100 days. So let's say you want to drink more water. 100 days a glass a day. Conscious effort to want a day. Whatever you did before, you'll still do, but one glass a day. so, you know, I started that with my assistance. I want to drink, you know, like four of these a day, you know, like, you know, 32 ounces, whatever the case is. And so every, we got a mug, and it's on my desk every time I walk in. And then I have some support from her saying, hey, remember to drink your water. So I just do it. So the first, you know, two, three weeks, I feel like I'm gonna drown myself in so much water. But then it's like, okay, now I'm used to it. Now I'm drinking as much water as possible, because the habit and one of the rules that I love to follow is the habit is more important than the intensity at first. So don't worry about the intensity. Develop the habit. So can you take one minute a day to focus on how you will achieve a goal? Just one minute a day. Can you take one minute a day to focus on your health?

Yeah.

Can you take one day to retrain your brain?

Yeah.

Can I take one day to you know, or one action a day.

Right.

And you start off with something, you know, and reduce it down to just a minute or two minutes or one behavior. If you can get that behavior to be a habit, it's easy to stack.

Right.

Of course.

It's just like the foundation of a building. Once you have the foundation, if you build it right, you stack.

Yeah.

And so every good discipline affects another and every bad discipline affects others. Usually when people say they're having a bad day, sure certain things may have gone wrong or something that they tried to do, you know, didn't work out. All information and experiences are processed at the non-conscious brain first and then it gives rise to something we call a feeling. So emotions are processed non-consciously. The electrical and chemical reaction to that is called a feeling. so when I'm not feeling the way that I want to feel, I don't focus on the feeling. I focus on the cause, the neuroelectrical charge that's occurred in my brain. And in most cases, it's something that you're doing to interpret an event that's causing the neuroelectrical signal, causing the feeling. So in meditation, for example, what? Why do you meditate? Well, obviously it's great for a whole host of health reasons, whether it's less stress, less, you know, lower blood pressure, less cortisol release, etc. But the one thing meditation does more than anything else is it gives you the ability to have a pause of awareness so that you sense what's happening at the non-conscious level. and what's happening outside of you. So when somebody behaves a certain way, it's processed at the non-conscious level, gives rise to your conscious mind for you to respond. And so when something happens, I like to be able to check in so that I don't react and I have the ability to respond. And if you do that enough through mindfulness, being aware, just being aware of exactly what's going on, then you have fewer and fewer of those times. So, you know, something happened last week. I was in a hotel room and I spilled some water on a shirt that I needed for a wedding that we were going to. And my wife was, oh, she was going off deep. And I was just calm.

Yeah.

And she goes, aren't you worried about this? Said, will it help?

Right.

But No, let's just figure out what to do. The accident already happened.

Why are we so wired to react in situations as opposed to be calm and say, well, this reaction is not going to serve a solution?

Well, we have a misunderstanding of flow of information and the way information is processed. And so, the reaction happens again at the reptilian non-conscious level. so every external stimuli, if you, if you get into some of the brain, which, again, is my, is my passion, is one of my friends, Dr. Evian Gordon, kind of with a great model. He says, you know, the number one thing to understand about the brain is safety and comfort first. Right. So in the environment that you're in, whether you like it or you don't, is irrelevant. Your brain finds that comfortable because it's the homeostasis. But safety first. So any loud noise, any type of real or imagined present or future pain based on the interpretation at the non-conscious level gives rise to automatic feelings. So the signal is sent from the reptilian or lizard brain to the emotional brain and it's only later logically understood if we take the time to be aware of it.

That's why people react so much in traffic instantly. That's right.

Instant reactions. Yeah, but here's something you could do quickly. It's called a reframe. So let's say you're driving in traffic and let's say somebody cuts you off and you've been sitting at the same spot for 20 minutes like I did this morning. And somebody, you're maybe looking down at your cell phone because you have some time because you're parked on the highway, right? And somebody cuts you off. So you could automatically react, go son of a bitch, I can't believe he just did that and just just use all of this energy, the cortisol, epinephrine, adrenaline that's flowing through your body and causing stress in your body. Or you can say, well, what if that person just found out their dog died and they're really trying to get home quickly? You go, okay, I guess it's okay if she or he cut in front of me. Or they just got a call from their mother, their mother fell. Would you change the way you felt about it? And the answer is, yeah, probably. And the reason because you changed the frame. so you can learn how to create frames for yourself of how you see the world, how you see failure, how you see effort, how you see your habits, how you create frames in advance that actually serve you through awareness and response versus reactivity. And that is what a lot of people who, for example, I'm gonna go back to professional athlete. What do you learn how to do? Respond in a variety of different ways in advance or through practice.

Yeah.

So that when it's game time, you're just unconsciously doing what you do.

Yeah. Especially, like, you know, I used to react a lot. Whenever I felt like anyone was attacking me physically or verbally on the, on the game in the game, I used to react and want to beat people up and hit people and respond. If I got hit in a weird way, I would always want to have the last say.

Right.

The last hit. And my coaches would always train me because I would always flagged. The person who is the second person is the one who gets flagged, not the first person who does the foul. And so I started to train myself and visualize, okay, this is gonna happen in this game. Like someone's gonna punch me in the nuts, someone's gonna bite me, someone's gonna do this, and I can either be calm and focus on the next play or I can respond and have a penalty for our team.

Right.

And I started to train my mind seeing it in the future as it already is happening, and that really supported me and not reacting.

And that's actually one of the best ways. It's a cognitive behavior therapy process where you practice in advance anything good or anything challenging. And what's really amazing, some of the latest research on goal achieving is the ability, you know, in the past I used to teach and also do visualize my goals. Whether it was my body, health, relationships, money, charity, whatever, I used to visualize the outcome. And some of the latest research now shows, in addition to visualizing the outcome, visualize the obstacles. And in the past, when we talked about this law of attraction, no, don't visualize the obstacles, you attract them to... No, no, no, your brain's way smarter than that. So if you have whether it's a belief that's in your way, a story that's holding you back, a circumstance, references, you know, something that's holding you back from achieving X. So take a look at whatever it is that you already know is holding you back. I don't believe I'm worthy. I don't believe I'm smart enough. Don't believe I'm good enough. Don't believe I'm skilled enough. I'm too young. Too old. I'm too this or too that or not enough of this or not enough of that. So address that and say, okay, here's an obstacle. I'm gonna visualize that obstacle being real and I'm gonna visualize just moving it aside and me moving towards my goal. The very act of a acknowledging that releases the neural tension around. If you do that over and over and over again, what your brain starts to see is, yes, there was a struggle, and so it's worthy of me creating this neural pattern around this new effort. Most of what we're doing is we're on autopilot. We're just eking through the day on autopilot. And so the brain loves anything that makes it curious. The brain likes anything novel, the brain likes a challenge. So earlier you were asking me about one of the brain training companies other than ours. They said, Does it work? I said, yeah, it's a workout for your brain. And if you can strengthen the neural patterns of you seeing yourself with an obstacle and overcoming it, what do you think that does to your self-confidence and certainty? Builds it up big time. Builds it up. So if you actually do the work and develop those patterns in your brain, as you're doing the stuff you need to do in the physical world, you just strengthen those neural patterns. That's what becomes your habits. And that's where it becomes really fun because you can develop the habits and the skills that you need that you'll actually take action on versus having knowledge and skills in your head.

Now, I feel like you've been testing things for decades now with all the research and the work you've done. So what does your morning routine look like now?

Oh, great.

What's, you know...

So today was a little bit different except for one thing because I drove from San Diego to LA to be with you. But I wake up, I pee, I do my meditation 20 to 30 minutes every morning. I don't care where I am in the world.

I do these ones on during that time.

I do a variety of different meditations. So there's meditations that I can do where I'm just observing my thoughts. Now a lot of people think, well, I'm not supposed to have thoughts when you meditate. Says who? There's hundreds of different ways to practice awareness. See, meditation is the art of awareness. Awareness internally, awareness externally, but also the various millions of layers that exist in the physical and the non-physical world. So this morning I did a meditation with some ocean sounds. And so it was about five o'clock. I woke up this morning, sat in my a little sofa, you know, with my feet propped up and did a 20 so minute meditation in the dark with the ocean. Just listening to the ocean, just paying attention and going into a trance-like state where after two or three minutes, like, I disappeared. Like, my body was part of air and space. So today was. I was using sound to get into that trance-like state. Other days, I'll do a mantra, whether It's a lot of people know transcendental meditation. So it's the OM mantra. So you just take a deep breath in and then as you exhale, it's oh. And the question is, why would you do that? And the answer is anytime you can give your brain a rhythm, it will entrain to that rhythm. That's one. Anytime you could pay attention to your breath, inhale and exhale, you turn off the parasympathetic nervous you turn on the parasympathetic nervous system, which is your rest and relaxation and your calm state of flow versus your sympathetic nervous system, which is the stress response system of adrenaline, norepinephrine, cortisol, Etc. So when you get the serotonin, oxytocin and dopamine going and you're in that state of calmness, you're able to enter deeper levels of Consciousness and awareness. So you're able to observe a thought, you're able to hear your heartbeat, you're able to sense different things that are giving are being risen in your body through thoughts that you're having. So you can actually start to see when I have this thought, here's the sensation in my body and you start to get so attuned to what's happening, what stimuli is happening within you that's producing these sensations that cause you to either take action or not retreat or move forward, you can start to get a feel for how the mechanics work. So I'll do that. Sometimes I'll put on some of the Tibetan monks and chant with them. So I use sound, no sound. I use breathing. I use open eye, closed eye, five minutes, 10 minutes, 30 minutes. So I practice the art of being in control of my breath, not breathing, just being one with the entire universe and feeling this other than normal state of consciousness that we're used to. It's not sleep and it's not conscious awareness. You're in an altered state of awareness and you can enter deeper and deeper and deeper layers of energy, which everything is made up anyway. Everything's connected. We have this, obviously our physical body, but the space between you and I right now, there's this vibrating packet of energy. And so you're able to access different layers of all of the intelligence and information that already exists in the universe versus the memories that we have in our brains. The whole secret is most of us.

Don'T realize, depending on which research you buy into, somewhere between 45 and 55% of what we do is habitual. And the great thing about habit is.

You don't have to think.

But once it's in your life, that.

Now frees you up to use that.

Energy for everything else that matters in your life.