Use These Habits To Manifest WEALTH, SUCCESS & ABUNDANCE In 2023 | Anthony O'Neal & Lewis Howes

When it comes to building wealth, once you look at your network, how are you building your number one business? What are you putting into here? Because what we put into here comes out. Everything about wealth building has little to.

Do with... What do people in their 20s and 30s have to deal with if they don't have those conversations in their, you know, middle school, teenage years?

You know, that was me. You know, we're going to deal with the lack of a lot of information that's important. The lack of understanding. What I did at 18 and 19, I'm still paying for today at 37 years old.

Really? Still?

Absolutely.

What things?

I mean, I have collection items on my credit report. You know, every time I bought two homes, you know, over the last three years, I had to explain that. And I'm the money guy. You know, it's like, Anthony, whoa, wait, what is this collection? what we see is from X amount of years ago.

Right, right.

Because we don't have the conversation. Everyone thinks, well, it'll be off in seven years. Well, here's the thing when it comes to money. It'll be all, let's say, for example, you own that particular collection item. And let's say you sell it to me. Now, I can put it back on their credit report for another seven years. So just because it was a 15 year old situation that I had, if it got sold to another company, collection agency, it restarts the whole process over again. So, I still have some items on my credit report from when I was 20 years old. And that's embarrassing when I go in there because no one sat down with me and had the true conversation around what is a credit card? What is interest? What's the difference between a credit card and a debit card? No one sat down and had that conversation with me. My mama told me, you, don't need a credit card. She just said, don't do it. She didn't explain to me, why not? No one sat down and had the hard conversation and give me the education. So without that education, I made poor decisions. Right. And when a credit card is so.

Easy to open up and everyone's selling them to you and, hey, get this, you get a couple hundred dollars free when you open it up.

Easy. Everywhere you go is by credit card. You can't go into the mall without being offered a credit card when you're checking out. You can't even go into Walmart anymore these days. You know, everything is about credit. And again, I'm not knocking people who go down that route. I don't do that route. I actually enjoy the freedom of waking up every single month and having the freedom of saying, you know what? I don't owe anybody. I just owe my mortgage. I love getting into my car and I have no car note. I love going to the mailbox and excited to go to my mailbox because.

There may be a check in there.

No bills. No bills. I don't know about you, but I remember every time my cell phone rang, if I didn't recognize the number, I didn't pick it up because it was a collection agency calling me. It feels good when my phone rings. I can, hello? What's up? I'm proud to answer it. And so, if we don't give people that proper information, 20-year-olds now tend to build this negative relationship with money and they're not really building wealth. And think about it, if we can start having this education now, we should be seeing more 20-year-olds being successful. Millionaires are being made now if you're dropping a course or if you're sitting at home and you're playing video games, people are actually making millions online right now. But if we have the conversation with them now, we can see a lot more younger people really producing income.

What else is keeping most people broke? Is it a mindset? Is it the habits and the actions? Is it the environment, the people they spend time with?

Is it... Yeah, yeah. For me, it's a network. You know, I have this, it's not my rule. It's a philosophy that go by 33%, 33%, 33%. The first 33% of people who are talking into you, So, I think a lot of people especially young people are not really building wealth because they don't have the right people talking into their lives saying, hey, here's what you need to be doing, here's what you should be reading, here's what you should be investing into. And so, if you don't have the right people talking into your life from wisdom, like I've called you from wisdom on a lot of different things. We're the same age but you're wiser than me in certain areas. So, hey, Louis, what do you think about this? So, they don't have the right people talking into them. Then the next one is who are they doing life with? So, if you're dating someone that is all about, hey, I want to go here, I want to do this, and I don't care if we have the money, let's finance it. And if you have friends in your circle that are saying, hey, let's go on this trip for spring break, let's just take our student loan refund check and put it on there, then that keeps them in a certain bracket. And then they're not really depositing anything into anyone. So, for me when it comes to the lack of building wealth, who are you around?

So the people that are depositing into you, the people kind of in your same sphere of influence, what decisions are you making together?

Yep.

And then are you depositing into someone else?

Are you, and if you're not, here's the thing, we're just reduplicating it. If you don't have someone depositing into you, if you don't have someone who you're doing life with on a healthy way, you can't deposit something positive into them.

So you have nothing to give.

Exactly.

You have nothing to teach, nothing to give.

And you're teaching them. You're teaching them the wrong things. You know, while I was with Dave for a while, every major money thing that I decided to ask him, before I purchased my first home, Dave, what do you think about this? Before I purchased my first big car, Dave, what do you think about this? And Dave would give me some wisdom. Dave would give me some insight. Dave is much wiser than me when it comes to money. I desire to be married, so I'm going to a married wise couple, saying, Anthony, here's some of the things you need to be working on.

Now.

And like for an example, my couple that I submit myself to for wise counsel for marriage, they told me this and I'll say it on your show. They said I'm selfish.

Why?

They said I'm selfish with my time, you know, because I work so hard. So, when I come home, I don't want to be on the phone. I don't want to spend time with her because I just want to rest. And they were like, no wife is going to want to be with a man who doesn't want to spend time with her.

Right.

And I was like, I'm selfish. And I didn't realize that one of the main reasons why my relationships didn't work in the past was because I was only thinking about Anthony. I liked her, I loved her, but I wasn't thinking about her because I was only thinking about this is what I needed. And so I have wise counsel that called me out on my stuff. You know, I have wise counsel say, you know what? That's not healthy. You're a good man. but here's some of your flaws. And so I think it's very important for all of us to have a group of people that can talk into us from different areas, whether it's your money life, your relationship life, your business life, entrepreneurship life, career life, spiritual life, you name it. Whatever you value, whatever is important to you, you need to have someone wiser than you speaking into that. And you need to listen to them. Don't tell them what they should be telling you. Listen to them.

Yeah.

It's a hard thing. It's really hard because no one likes to be told what to do.

It sounds like Dave gave you a lot of the financial wisdom for many years. What would you say were the three biggest lessons around money he taught you directly like that that you implemented in your financial life?

I think it's the same thing he's teaching everyone within his message. Number one, avoid debt. Number two, live below your means. And number three, you know, really create margin, you know? And that was something, especially number three, you build wealth by creating margin.

What does that mean for people?

It goes back to just living below your means. So if you're making $10,000 a year, okay, are you, not a year, let's say you're making $10,000 a month, for an example, you should be living off like seven grand, six, seven grand. And that margin is what you're investing into. That margin is what you are looking to build wealth off of. I think in today's day and time, we're seeing about nearly 70-72, 80% of people living paycheck to paycheck. Because I was there.

They're not living below their means. They're spending.

Every dollar.

Every dollar, as opposed to saying, you know what? I want to do this trip, but I'm not gonna have any left over if I keep doing all these trips. I want to keep going out because I like going out and having dinner. But that's an extra $100 every meal, as opposed to eating $15 worth of my groceries for this night. I want to, buy the new shoes. I want you to spend on this. But then if you're living month to month, you don't have the margin to invest. What should we be investing in once we have the margin?

I mean, once you have the margin, I think before you do any investing, you should be eliminating your debt. First. First. And then once you eliminate your debt, you need to go ahead and get a fully funded emergency fund. But I think people really don't understand it's the debt part that really prevents you from building. You can't build wealth with your living in debt constantly. You can't. you know, it's like a lot of people say, well, I'm going to use other people's money. Well, wait, that makes no sense to me. You're going to use other people's money to build wealth, but it's their wealth.

Because they own it. So for me, it's.

And what if you lose that money, you're in more debt. Exactly.

You know?

So for me, it's all about eliminating the debt. The debt. I don't want to pass down debt to my kids. They say that the average person is going to die with bills and with benefits, and the benefits are only enough to take care of the bills. not to, you're not leaving it with any land with no real estate, with no wealth to pass down. So, for me, I'm eliminating the debt so that way I can really start building true wealth. I want to move forward not worrying about my past catching up with me. And that's very, very important to me. And so, when it comes to, when you create that margin with wealth, you got to maximize on your 401Ks. You got to maximize on your Roth IRAs. You got to maximize on maybe your, some real estate. One of my mentors told me something so, so good that I'm starting to get into now. He said, we have no more capability of making land. We can build a lot of houses. We may can't go wide, but we can go tall, but we cannot make any more land. Buy land, Anthony. And I was like, buy land. He was like, yeah, get some land and sit on it. Don't wait to get the land. get the land and then wait and pass that down to your kids and your kids' kids. And I was like, okay, so I've been doing that.

Where you been buying land?

I bought some land in my home city, Columbia, South Carolina, where I was born. And then with me moving again here soon, I'm gonna look at some land out there as well. But I went back home to purchase some land because I know eventually, yeah, that's where my family is. And so that's where the roots are for myself. So, I definitely bought some land there, 'cause out there you could buy it for dirt cheap. Right, right, right. So I'm just gonna sit on it. Right. You know, and then down the road, somebody's gonna wanna build on it.

And they wanted to cut my kids some a lot of money. Right, right. What else do you think people should.

Be doing in their 20s and 30s to build wealth? When it comes to building wealth, once you look at your network, how are you building your number one business? You know, a lot, and I tell this to everyone, mind your business.

How so?

Because your mind is a business. So if you mind your business, your mind is a business. How are you growing your number one business?

Your mind.

Exactly. You know, what podcasts are you listening to? What books are you reading? Are you watching less TV? Or what are you putting into here? Because what we put into here comes out. And so wealth building is really not just about the physical things, as far as the money, but it's like, what are you learning? What are you putting inside of your mind that can then produce true wealth and keep wealth? What wisdom and knowledge are you obtaining? So that way when you do make the moves, you can also sustain it.

Yeah.

And so you'll learn that about me. It's like everything about wealth building has little to do with actual green, with actually paper. It's about your core, it's about your mindset, it's about your network. Who are you surrounding yourself with? How are you all minding your business, growing your asset? your number one asset, which is your mind. Then from there, we can talk about it. How do we, number one, avoid debt? It goes back to Dave Ramsey's Baby Steps. Avoid debt, get a fully funded emergency fund, start investing, start thinking about your kids, and then from there, oh man, life is gravy. You can really enjoy and do anything that you want, whether that's some people are doing it with cryptocurrency, some people are doing it with day trading, That's fine. Whatever is good for you. Now, I don't do single stocks. I'm not a fan of single stocks. I'm just a fan of real estates, some good growth stock mutual funds, and just really focusing on building my business.

Right.

What would you say are the habits wealthy people do that broke people don't do?

Ooh, man. That's a good one. When I think of all the wealthy people in my circle, habits is they have a daily routine. And when I say a daily routine, they have a Monday through Friday routine. They work out, they read. One of the things that I've learned over the last few years is when I wake up in the morning, I do my personal devo. every single morning after that, after I read a devo, I actually read and study within my particular field. So anything around money, anything around relationships, I'm studying in that. Okay? And then from there, I go to the gym. I see a lot of wealthy people are very active and they take care of their body. From there, oh, there's another one, man. They value family. They really value the presence of family and value.

Why is that?

Because I think they understand you can sit here and make all this money, but who are you making it for? Who are you impacting? Why are you impacting the world when your home is all jacked up? And so what I've learned from wealthy people is I want to make sure my home is taken care of before I take care of the world. And now again, that's not all wealthy people. that's just the wealthy people that's in my circle. They make sure that the wife, the husband, the kids, they are good, that they're in a healthy place before they go serve the world with their particular business.

Right.

And I love that. I mean, I was with one wealthy guy just the other day. He probably does about $100 million a year. And he gave me an hour of his time for lunch. He got a text message from his wife. He ended it 10 minutes early because his wife said, Hey, I can't pick up kids. He was like, I get it. It's no problem. Hey, I gotta go. And I was like, wow, I was really looking forward to that last 10 minutes.

Right.

And he was like, sorry, man. You know, wife can't get the kids. I need to go get 'em, man. You'll learn that one day.

Right. You made the priority. You understand it, yeah.

You know, your family needs to be priority. And I believe when you can be a good steward of the little of your family, then you can be trusted with more. You can be trusted with 100 employees. You can be trusted with impacting the community. But if you can't take care of home, you can't be trusted a little more. And that's one thing. I'm, I'm, I got a little dog, man. So it's like, for me, I take good care of her. I take good care of me. I take care of my home. So that way, you know, I can get the wife, I can get the kids, and I can start practicing taking care of home first. Yes. And then serving people on the outside. Because I grew up seeing pastors and seeing different people focus on the churches and. focus on communities and coming home to a jacked up home. And so I'm seeing wealthy people now, they've created a healthy habit to where now they're focused on family and families now are building wealth. Husband and wives are working together. Now kids want to work in the family business because now pops and mom took care of home. Another habit that I'm seeing here that wealthy people doing is they know where their money is going. They have a vision for their money. So, it's not just a budget but they have a clear vision of okay, this is where we want to go. And what I've learned is that not only do they have a clear vision but they make sure everyone that is connected with them whether they are dating, whether they are married, whether they have kids that everyone is aligned with that vision. So, okay, if our goal is to make $100 million cool, great. They have the vision here is our goal that gets us to that vision Here are the daily habits that get us to this goal. So, they have a clear vision followed by clear goals, followed by clear daily habits that gets them to the ultimate vision. And I'm sitting there amazed one day I sat in a room and just really watched him put his vision up on the wall and just really backtracked it to today. His vision was five years down the road he updates his vision every three months and he holds himself accountable. him and his team hold himself accountable to, okay, are we getting closer? Are we making the right decisions? Are we making the right moves to get there? And that's very, very important. That's something that I'm putting into place now myself.

That's cool. The money vision, and everyone's aligned to the money vision.

Absolutely.

That's great, man.

And when you go back to it, here's my thing with vision. When you have a clear vision, It's going to, that's your way of saying yes or no. So, it's like if someone comes to you and says, hey, I want to do this, your vision says yes or no, not you. If I meet a young lady and she says, hey, I want to do XYZ, okay, cool, does that get me closer to my vision or does that take me away from my vision?

Yes.

Yes or no. If my vision is I want to do this in the next five years, I'm going to apply for a job and that job is saying, hey, you got to do this, Cool, great. This is aligned with my personal vision. And I think 20s and 30 year olds need to learn how to write a vision for their life.

That's cool.

Because if they have a clear vision for their life, it helps them stay focused and move forward. And it gives them an easy, hey, you're a great person or this is a great opportunity. It's just not my opportunity. You're a great person, you're just not a good fit for where I want to go. you're not aligned with where I'm going. So you gotta have a vision.

What's the best way to write a vision and come up with a vision?

And that's something that I'm actually working on now, coming out with this next February. And the very first thing is you really gotta sit down and just ask yourself a lot of questions. What are you passionate about? What do you think your purpose is? And then it's like when you think, what are you passionate about? What do you think your purpose is? Where do you see yourself going? You know, my vision is to help millennials and minorities avoid debt and build wealth. I had to ask myself why. It's because I was a millennial and a minority, broke, disgusted, living paycheck to paycheck. So when I started asking myself those questions, I really got down to my deep why. And one of my mentors, Dr. Darius Daniels, said, if your why doesn't make you cry, then the price of commitment will make you cry.

Mm.

And so when you really want to understand your vision, you really have to ask yourself, okay, where are you going? And then why do you want to go there? And when you ask yourself that at least five times, you're going to really be able to develop a clear vision of, I want to do this, I want to do that, I want to do this by this date because of these particular reasons. And it's very important.

Yeah.

Very important to have that.

Right.

Do you think, Anyone can be a millionaire. And the reason I ask you that is because there's a lot of people that I see specifically in LA who are working minimum wage, right? Minimum wage is I think $15 or $16, $17 an hour here in LA. It's actually pretty high, but compared to the rest of the USA, I think, I remember when it was $6, you know, I mean it was 5.56 bucks when I was growing up in Ohio. But with people who are overworked, overwhelmed, only making minimum wage, and maybe made poor choices before that had to, they're paying off debts, they've got, you know, family situations, challenges, do you think it's possible for any of them at some point to become a millionaire?

I think anything is possible. I don't think a lot of people have the mindset to become a millionaire. But I think anything is possible. I think all things are actually possible.

What's the mindset people need to develop in order to become a millionaire?

They have to get over the past. I think a lot of people have made some decisions in the past. Some people are still hurt by history. Some people are stuck in what they've only been exposed to. And so I think There's two things to shift the mindset. One, shift your exposure. You got to step outside of your comfort zone and say, you know what? Hey, I'm tired of making 16 bucks. Let me go over here and try this. Let me just go over here and just ask this one question. I think going back to when your questions earlier and with this question as well, some people are so comfortable that they don't understand that they are preventing themselves from becoming a millionaire. They are preventing themselves from starting that business. because nothing extraordinary happens within our comfort zone. You have to step outside of your comfort zone and step into your uncomfort zone. So now you can start exposing yourself to something that may stretch you. This may challenge you in some areas. You may fail a couple of times when you step outside of your comfort zone. But you know what? Every time you fail you'll learn what you need to do differently. And so, I think everyone can be a millionaire. But it goes back to one, do they have the mindset and are they willing to be uncomfortable for a season?

And maybe lots of seasons.

Absolutely.

Might be consistently.

Because, I mean, you've been in this by yourself for a long time. Yeah, you hit a good high and then boom, something can happen. And I know that for a fact from myself. I'm like, Man, I was just doing good two months ago.

Where did this come from?

But you can't run. You got to stay right there. You got to learn in that season. Because what I love about a storm, every time a storm comes, the rainbow is next, the grass is green. I just got a lot of water so something's going to flourish from this season.

That's right, right. Maybe it flooded for a minute but now. Exactly.

So, it's like if I'm going to take this heat, something positive has to come from it. And so, I think a lot of people should be millionaires, a lot of people should be business owners. but they're comfortable with their nine to five job.

What's it take? How long does it typically take for someone when they start working to become a millionaire? How many years is kind of like the average millionaire? And maybe don't have information.

Yeah. I don't know that.

Is it a decade? Is it two decades? Is it three decades? Is it kind of. How long does it take? Typically. Typically. Yeah. Not the extreme cases where it's like, okay, I launched the business and then sold it for a billion five years later, but. The average millionaire, how long do you think it takes?

And we're saying the average millionaire who may be a school teacher and just paid off their debt and started investing, or are we talking about someone who started the business and they're just making good money?

Both.

Because I think the average millionaire in America, once they really start the process, can really hit that within a matter of 10 to 12 years. Eliminating their debt.

Once they eliminate debt. Yeah, invest.

Yeah, so after they eliminate the debt and really start really, really growing, For an example, if you invest into a good growth stock mutual fund, $100 or $200 a month, you can do that within 30 years just from investing into that at that rate. But again, if you're investing properly, 15% of your income, if you are living way below your means, if you're not racking up things, you can cut that stuff in half and be there a lot quicker. I really think it all depends on that individual and how bad do they want it.

Right.

And if you wanted that bad- You.

Want to have the vision.

Absolutely. If you're focused on, hey, this is my vision, this is where I'm going, and you're only allowing people in your circle who are aligned, who will hold you accountable to that, man, you could be a millionaire within the next two, three years, depending on what you wanna do. But if you are saying, hey, you know what? Yeah, I wanna be a millionaire.

If you're not determined, yeah, it could take you 30, 40, 50 years. I think you gotta understand, why you want that, why is it meaningful for you to have that and sacrifice out on going out to dinners and sacrifice on the trips and never enjoying life with some fun or with some spending here and there. You gotta ask yourself, is this worth it? Investing 10 years cutting out pretty much all these things that I would pay for and just doing free activities which you still have a great life with. But are your social circles gotta be in a similar mindset as you. You're not gonna be able to go to the movies and this and that all the time. and buying all the new clothes. So you just got to be prepared for that and be aware of that.

If you don't have a why, you won't be a millionaire. If you don't know why you're really doing it, if you don't know why you're saying no, if you don't know why you're saying yes, you won't build true wealth. You can be rich. You can be rich today and broke tomorrow. But if you don't really understand why you're going after it, if your why doesn't make you cry, you will not be wealthy. And wealth to me is long lasting. Riches, I have a lot today. And I want wealth to where my kids, kids, kids will know my name, even though they didn't meet me. And for me, that's very, very important.

What needs to happen for that to happen?

I need to pass down not just money, I need to pass down wisdom and knowledge. I was watching this movie with Steve Harvey, It wasn't a movie, it was an interview. Or was it Steve Harvey? I don't know who it was, but it was somebody. I thought it was Steve Harvey. In the back of my head, I was like, it's not Steve Harvey. But somebody was saying, Hey, do you know your great-great-grandfather's name? And he was like, no. And she said, Do you know why? And he said, no. And she said, Because he didn't leave you anything. I remember hearing that when I was laying down in the bed and I stood up, Louis, and I was like, I don't know my great-great-grandfather's name.

No.

I never met.

I don't know my great-grandfather's name.

That's what I'm saying. I never met my great-grandfathers. And I'm like, wow, but if they would have left me something, I'd be.

Like, thank you, thank you.

Grateful, you know what I'm saying? So it was like, now, on my drawing board in my office, it's me. I have stick figures of me and my kids and my family and then their kids and then their kids and their kids. And right next to it, I says they will know my name.

Dang, that's pretty powerful. Give me chills.

Because it's like, I'm gonna leave them not just with money. I'm going to equip my kids with money, but also with the wealth and the knowledge to sustain it and to take it further. And then I'm gonna educate them to, Hey, listen, you're gonna leave your kids with money, but also with the wealth and knowledge to grow that. And then you're gonna leave your kids. And then boom, the wealth and the knowledge. I think oftentimes we focus so much on, let's just leave our kids with a lot of money.

And then not teach them.

And not teach them nothing. What's the point of giving them money if they don't have the wisdom and the knowledge? What's the point of giving that if you haven't stewed the time with your kids to educate them on, Hey son, hey daughter, here's how mom and dad built it, here's how we sustained it, here's how you're going to build it, here's how you can sustain it. And that's so, so, so important to me because that's my why. That's why I get up every single day. It's not because of the nice car that I have. It's not because I have the opportunity to come on a Lewis Howes show and just like, yeah, talk to everyone. No, I'm doing everything I'm doing today for my great, great grandkids who I probably will never meet. But they would be able to say, you know what, man, my great-great-grandfather Anthony impacted a lot of people. Hey, Mom, Dad, did your Mom and Dad talk to you about Anthony? Right. Like, wow, can we go back and look at that video that he did with Lewis 20, 30, 40, 50, 60 years ago? Like, wow. That gets me out of my bed. That gets me going to the gym. that makes me Steward my single season correctly, because I haven't been a good Steward of my single season. I haven't maximized my single season all the time. That's why I'm focused now on maximizing my single season. So that way I can make the right decisions that impacts generations to come. And I think that's, to me, what wealth is. Wealth is how deep can I go with my wealth? money wise with my knowledge and wisdom.

What are the things we need to start changing that's holding us back?

You know, Louis, that's a good question, man. I think one of the very first things that I focused on was has it has nothing to do with actually wealth. It has everything to do with who we are on the inside, our core.

Okay.

When we can really get down into our core and understand who are we at our core on the inside, it impacts our wealth building. Here in California, I went to Palomar College. One of the main reasons why I got into debt, one of the main reasons why it took me a while to get to the state where I am today is because I was trying to please everyone else. I was allowing her and him to tell me how I should think, how I should talk, how I should dress. At my core, I wasn't confident in who I was. Because of that, I was able to be manipulated into saying, you know what? I should look like this. Let me go put this on a credit card. Let me go finance, you know, I put two leather couches, two leather couches inside an apartment that was running me about $1,500 a month, right? But it's only like 800 square feet. I financed that just to look good because somebody else told me, that's what you need to do. And I, and I at my core didn't really understand who I was.

Really.

And so if you really want to start building wealth, one of the key ingredients to being wealth, in my personal opinion, is has nothing to do with money. It has everything to do with who you are and how much you believe in yourself. What is your assignment? What were you born to do? When you really know that, then now you can move forward into building wealth.

How do you know what your assignment is?

You know, for me, I'm a Christian. And so I practice the Christian faith. And I believe that I was put on this purpose, put on this earth, one, to be a good father, to be a good husband, and then also to impact the minority and millennial culture when it comes to stewarding their single season and honestly getting out of debt and building true and lasting wealth. You see, wealth to me is just not always about the finances. Wealth to me is like, what knowledge am I passing down to the community, to the culture, to my kids? What wealth am I passing down to the people who are watching us? today, that knowledge. And when I think of wealth, I think of knowledge, I think of wisdom, I think of opportunities. And so when I think about my assignment, it's okay.

How did you know that was your assignment?

Man, I didn't really know that, honestly, until maybe about 12, 13 years ago. I was sleeping in the back of my car off of Highway 76 here in Oceanside, California, and I was homeless. and I remember being literally naked physically and naked spiritually. And I was washing myself in the backseat of the car because I was about to go again talk to a young lady. And what do you mean?

You were cleaning yourself just so you could go.

Yeah, exactly. I didn't want to be funky. I didn't want to smell bad. And I wanted to meet up with her at the mall in their ocean side. And man, I was sleeping in the back of my car and I remember looking at myself in the rearview mirror and I saw myself with soap suds from the top of my neck all the way down. And I started crying. And I was at that point, I didn't go see her that night because I was like, I'm tired of living the life that I'm living. And I said, there has to be something better for me. There has to be something bigger, better options. And it was at that time I started really looking for what is my purpose? Why am I here? Who do I need to be? I started submitting myself to my parents again, to different mentors, and I really found my niche. And it was like, hey, how many people are actually teaching true wealth? How many people are teaching young people how to avoid debt? Everything is always about consuming debt. how many people are actually teaching them a different way? Hey, there's a different way of building wealth. You can actually avoid debt and still build true wealth. But what's the true definition of wealth? See, growing up for me, wealth was what kind of watch do you have? What kind of car do you drive? You know, what kind of house do you live in? How much, what kind of shoes do you have on? What kind of backpack do you have? No one really said wealth is up here. Wealth is inside of here. Wealth is what are you passing down? And so, when I really started seeking for what is my purpose that's when I found my purpose, when I literally said, I want to know why am I here? And when I said that specifically, God started showing me different people in my life who helped me really reveal my true purpose.

Interesting. So you realized from being broke and homeless that you wanted to learn, you wanted to teach wealth generation, but you didn't know how to make money at that point.

No, I didn't.

So you had to go on the journey of discovering what does that look like? What does that mean? How do I get out of debt? How do I earn A consistent living, how do I save it, how do.

I invest it, the whole process. You know, 'cause growing up, man, I was taught, I grew up in a very strong Christian faith home. I have four parents. I have two biological parents and two step parents. My biological mom and stepdad and my siblings live here in California. Then my biological father and stepmom live in North Carolina, right? And I grew up in a very church thing. The only conversation we really had around finances was give. Just give to the church.

That's it. That's it.

You didn't talk about money. No, we didn't really talk about, Hey, here's how you build wealth. Here's how you start a business. Here's what entrepreneurship looks like. It was, Hey, when you get your money from Wendy's, you're gonna get 10% to the church. Then what you do with the other 90%, save it. Save a little bit, but you know, you want the shoes, you go buy it. No one really talked to me about how to invest. No one said, Hey, son, save this money, baby, go start a small business. So, growing up, I just knew go get a job, you know, work the 40 hours a week, make sure you get a good 401k benefit package with some good health insurance and keep your credit score above of 700. And then you get a good retirement package at the end of the at the end of your time. No one really said, hey, here's how you start thinking at 18 to build true wealth. Here's here's how you start a business. So, I said it has to be more. Yes, there has to be more than just living paycheck to paycheck, sleeping in the back of my car, and looking at everyone else look good, but honestly, I was tired of looking good and honestly not being good. Yeah, that's a big one, man.

Looking good is, that's tough. If you don't feel good on the inside, it doesn't matter how much money and how good you look, how shiny you are on the outside, if it doesn't feel confident in yourself and proud of yourself of what you're creating. I'm curious, you've talked to a lot of different individuals, parents, families about money. What would you say are the three biggest conversation mistakes that parents teach their kids around money in general? Or three things that they don't teach they should be teaching. What are they saying? That's maybe not the best thing they should say. You know, you had your experience, but what are other people saying that you're hearing?

Number one thing is Chores, you know, like we're gonna pay you and give you an allowance for just being my son.

That's good or bad?

That's bad.

Okay.

No, no. We shouldn't teach our kids that the world is going to reward them for just being who they are. No, we need to teach our young people, hey, the world is going to reward you by actually producing and by working, okay?

By offering a value.

Exactly.

Not by just living.

Just by waking up.

Like, what does that teach you if you're just gonna give someone money consistently without working?

Exactly. It doesn't teach you nothing. And then it's like, why are you paying your kids to make up his bed? To make up her bed? Why are you paying your kids to wash dishes?

No.

Pay them to go wash cars, not your car, but your neighbor's car. Pay them to go cut other people's grass. Pay them to go walk other people's dogs. Pay them to walk around the neighbor and pick up trash. Teach them the true value of working in exchange for finances. So that's number one is we got to stop teaching them that, hey, the only way you can get paid is, you know, make up your bed. That's misleading our young people. Number two is, you know, I wrote the book, Debt Free Degree, while I was with Ramsey Solutions, is that the only way to go to college is to finance it. You know, we got to start to stop telling our young people, hey, your Harvards and Yales and Princeton's are the best schools out there. No, I know a lot of prestigious people who went to community colleges, but I know a lot of people who went to a Harvard or a Yale, a prestigious school, but they're not prestigious individuals. And so what we got to start teaching young people is, hey, go to college if that's the route that you want to go. But trade schools are actually in right now, and it's less expensive. I got a friend who's a plumber.

Who'S making multiple six figures a year. Absolutely. He's a solo plumber crushing it. And he's like, I go golfing every week. I travel. I was just in Hawaii. and he's got his own little business in Vegas making multiple six figures. I'm like, dude, you're crushing it.

He's like, yeah, no one wants to do his job.

I'm making bank. No one, man.

I just had a handyman come out.

To my house in Astoria. It was 60 bucks an hour, probably, or something.

150 an hour. I see y'all in the wrong business. I was like, Hammering some nails up in here, you know? He was like, But nobody wants to do the ugly work.

Right.

Nobody wants to be hot. Nobody wants to be cold when it's, you know, 30 degrees outside. So he's-- I mean, he can rack up. So, we got to start teaching our young people, start asking them, Hey, what do you want to do? You know, what is it that you feel as if you can do in the world and actually enjoy it? Parents have to stop telling their kids what they will do, okay? You have some parents saying, Hey, I want you to go to this school and become this when you get older. And then they grow up growing envy of their parents because their parents didn't give them the opportunity to say, you, know what? Hey, let's work hand in hand. Or resentful or whatever it is, yeah.

Exactly.

So, it's like, how do we do that together? Okay, so that's number two. And then number three, this is going to be an unpopular one, but we got to stop teaching our kids that the only way to be successful financially is to have a high credit score. We got to stop saying that.

I don't even, maybe I'm weird, but I never even, I don't even know what my credit score is. I never tried to get my credit score, I didn't even check what my credit score was until like a year ago when I had to do some, I don't know, I signed up for some financial services thing and they had to check it and I was like, okay, it's never meant anything to me. Well, first of all, I've never bought a house. I've always rented. So it's never mattered, I guess, because I've never tried to buy a house. And then I don't know what else.

I would need it for, because I'm.

Just-- what about a car? You know, some people buy cash.

You bought cash?

Yeah, I bought cash. Well, I had a used car. My dad taught me this principle. He always had used cars. Yeah, me too. And he had used car for like 10, 15 years. I mean, he would keep it perfectly clean. Okay. And highest condition for like 10, 15 years. Yeah, yeah. So it always looked and felt new, even though it was old.

Yeah.

And he didn't understand the value of buying a new car. That's what he taught me early on. Unless there was a massive tax break cut for him. So when I was like 16 or 17, he finally bought his first new car because it was a Denali. I'll never forget this. It was 20 years ago because he, there was some big tax cut for like getting an SUV at that time, 20 years ago.

Yes.

And so he got a massive tax break for his business for that. And so, but other than that, he always had like a 1988 Oldsmobile. You know, it was just like, that he then passed down to me for a thousand bucks and I drove that thing for a number of years. But I, so I never bought a new car until three years ago. I'd never had a new car. I had a 1997 Cadillac Eldorado Beritz for five years here in LA.

In LA.

Two door, didn't even have a radio. Didn't have Bluetooth, nothing. And I drove that, and I'm talking about with the business that I have, being around the people I have. And I bought it for $4,000 used.

Do you still have it?

I gave it back, I bought it and I sold it back to the guy who sold it to me two and a half years ago when I bought my Tesla. So for a long time, I just had a $4,000 car.

Wow.

And I, 'cause I didn't see the value at that time in buying a brand new car. I was like, Let me use this.

Money to grow it.

To invest in my team and my business, in my personal development, my lifestyle. I didn't feel like I needed a flashy car going back to your first point earlier. I didn't need that to feel good about myself. I just felt good by adding value, and I felt comfortable in a car that got me from point A to point B.

And.

But you didn't need to look flashy, you know? But that came from the teaching of your father, though.

Yeah.

Because he didn't have a flashy car. Exactly. And nowadays, and then, too, growing up, because we're right around the same age, social media wasn't big back then, so.

We didn't see all the flashy stuff.

You just saw your neighbor maybe had a nice car, and that was it. Or your friend or whatever had. Or whenever you go to church or something like that. So, like, now this generation of kids.

Are seeing the flashy stuff. Oh, you gotta have the nice car to be.

Perceived as successful.

Yeah, I never felt, it's funny, I tell this story. Someone asked me this. I was doing an interview for someone who was applying for a position here at Greatness Media this morning. And she was like, you still take your scooter to work? Because I talk about this. I was just about to ask you that.

Yeah, I have a little, like, it.

Must have been like 200 bucks, $199 scooter.

Right.

Not electric. This is a push scooter. Oh, it's a push scooter.

Push like a razor, like a big razor.

I saw a video of it. I thought it was an electric. No, man, it's not electric. and I literally am in a building, you know, a block away from here. So there's no point in driving. I could walk here a lot of time. And I take a little scooter most days. It's not here today 'cause it's raining, but I'll scoot it over and I come out of my building and there's like the fanciest cars you could ever imagine. Like every million dollar car you can think of, all those names, they're out there. And I'd like to just weave in and out of them, just scoot around and just smile. Like, sure, they're cool, but I don't need those things to feel fulfilled and happy. Like, I'm a joyful human on my scooter. It gets me where I need to be, and it's fun. I'm not saying I wouldn't like one of those cars. I actually don't care that those cars don't mean much to me. They're cool to look at, and I'll sit in one and be like, oh, this is nice. But I kind of feel weird driving it like I'm gonna break something. I don't know. For me, it's a mentality of just feeling good. and if that's your thing, you like flashy cars, you like flashy watches, that's your thing.

That's your thing. Cool.

Yeah.

But don't do it because you need to feel better about yourself, in my opinion.

And it goes back to the core.

Yeah.

When you really know who you are, you operate and you walk differently.

Yes.

And that is something that over the last few years, I've really mastered and really keep drilling into myself, this is who you are, this is where you're going. I like cars. I am a car guy.

There you go. So it's your thing.

That is my thing. But you know what? I'm really coming to value a whole lot more than cars is I want a wife.

Right.

You know, I want kids, you know, and it's like I value that more.

Yeah.

And when I say I value that, man, I didn't go to Disney World. You know, I haven't been to Disney World yet because, you know, growing up, my family couldn't afford it.

You've been to Disneyland up here in LA?

I haven't been to Disneyland. Wow. And I've been to Six Flags, you know, but we couldn't afford- Stepchild of Disneyland. Exactly. You know, we couldn't afford the family trip spring breaks. And it's like, man, when I think about it now, I'm trying to steward and maximize my single season so that way when I do have a wife, I do have kids, I can say yes to my wife. because I steward this season well. And it's like one of the things I'm really teaching myself is as a young man dating right when it comes to my money is I would rather tell my girlfriends no today so I can tell my wife yes tomorrow.

Let's go.

You know what I'm saying? It's like I don't have a problem telling them, hey, I'm not going to spend $100 on a date on you right now, you know, because you may not be my wife, but I refuse to tell my wife no because I told all of them yes. And as I'm maturing and as I'm growing, I'm realizing that the caliber of my financial future and the caliber of my future family's future is depending upon the choices that I made today. And so I have to be willing and be strong at my core to say no to things that will set me up for my future. And I want my wife to be like, thank you for telling them no. I want my kids because I remember my mom and dad, unfortunately, I have great parents. But I remember wearing shoes that had holes at the bottom of it and we had to put tape on the bottom of it. I don't want that to be my kids. And the decisions that I made today impacts that. I want to be able to take my kids to Disney World. That's the only reason why I haven't been. I've dated ladies with kids. Let's go to Disney World. Nope.

Why not?

I want to go there with my wife and my kids. I don't want to go there with my girlfriend and her kids. I want to go there with my wife. and my kids, you know, I want to be able to do things with my family that my family couldn't do when I was growing up.

That's cool.

And so I'm learning to, I'm valuing that more. That wakes me up every day. That gets me excited every day. That gets me on my YouTube channel every single day because I'm working for them, then I'm also working for the community.

That's cool. What's the third thing? The parents Should be doing more.

The last one we talked about, like, don't tell them the only way to be successful is having 700, 800 credit score. Got it, got it. Which goes into one thing that they're not doing enough is really having the money conversation with them early on as possible. You know, I think that parents, as soon as they say mama, as soon as they say daddy, you need to start having a money conversation. Really? Absolutely.

And two? Absolutely. What are those conversations they should be having? It's on their level, you know what I mean?

If the kid is saying, Hey, mom, can I get a piece of candy? Well, they understand that candy, tell them, hey, it costs money and show them, hey, you got to give this in exchange for that. But let's, you know, pass that level. Let's start having a conversation with middle schoolers. One of my good friends has a private school in Nashville. I went to read books with them last a couple of months ago again, right? When I walk into their school, she has a picture of all of her kids on college campuses. These are middle school kids. Fifth grade. And I said, what are you doing? She said, actually, if you look on this one, those are third graders. And I was like, you,'re taking them to college? Do they even understand what they're looking at? She says, no. But young people are impressionable at a very young age. So they will remember, like, hey, I want to go here, so I need to work hard. right now. And so it was like we have to stop saying our young people are young. If they can remember songs, if they can remember famous dances from TikTok, they can remember the conversation around money. So we got to have that conversation as early as possible. So that way when they get into high school, they are already aware of what's going on with the finances.

Talking about the stick figures with the partner and the kids and the kids' kids. how important is the choosing the right partner and making money, keeping money, investing money, building money.

That's the second most important and decision of my life.

It's the right part. Choosing the right partner.

The first one is, that's just my spiritual walk. Just, you know, being a Christian. That, I think that was the first part. The first and most important part.

The second most is Choosing the right partner.

Yep, and choosing the right wife. You want me to be real? I'm trying not to get emotional. I had the right wife.

You did.

I'll let her go.

Why?

Because I was young, I was dumb. Ooh, I was immature. Dang. I was selfish.

And.

I didn't, I thought I wanted something else.

Mmm.

But I let it go. And so now it's like, okay, let's fix it because, you know, hey, you don't want to pass up on that again. I believe that the quality of my future is depending upon the quality of my wife. And I had that there. but because of the immaturity, because of the looking at what everyone else had around me, I let someone go who could have been my wife. And I learned from that.

Yeah.

You know, it was a, it was a hard season for me because I had to, I had, one of the things I've learned that wealthy people do very well is they confess when they're wrong and they tell themselves, so you messed up. How do we make sure we do not make this decision again? That's when I say, you know what? Let me submit myself to a married couple to get wisdom. You know what? Let me just talk more to my therapist about this area so I can make sure that the next time I have the opportunity to meet an amazing woman that I do not pass up on that again. And so my partner is the second most decision because this is the woman that will be raising my daughter. This is a woman that be raising my son. This is the woman that together we're going to build an empire. I need a partner that we are aligned, in sync, and we have each other's back.

What would be the three questions you would ask about money before you would move forward on that commitment of like dating? Maybe you're dating for a few dates.

But I wouldn't even go, I'm not even getting into a committed relationship with the woman until we have a money conversation.

And what should that conversation consist of?

The very first question is, I'm asking her, is what was the conversation you had about money growing up? You know, what did your parents teach you about money? And then two, for me, What's your thoughts around ownership? What's your thoughts around debt? And then three, it's a fun one but it answers a lot of questions. It's going to answer a lot. You have a million dollars right now, what are you doing with it? What are you doing with it? And a bonus one that I really, really, really, I really have this conversation on both sides. What do you value?

Most in life?

Yes. Like what's valuable to you that money cannot buy?

And.

It just starts the conversation going. And I think really understanding the root of the individual really sets you up to understand, okay, how they're going to be thinking, proceeding forward.

Now, if someone gives you, let's say, give you all the wrong answers.

Yeah.

Right. You're just like, that was the opposite. what I was hoping you'd say. Does it mean they can't change their mindset around this? Or is it kind of, you've been setting this way for 20, 30 years? Right. It's gonna take, it might take some time to unlearn these things.

I don't think there's a wrong answer because I think how we were raised, I mean, we can't help how we were raised. My next question would be like, hey, are you willing to have a conversation around these things? Are you willing to learn something differently? You know, what's so funny is everyone knows that I'm the no debt guy, no credit card guy. And I've dated ladies who had credit cards. And their first question is, well, are you willing to learn? I said, yeah, if you can prove to me that I need a credit card, I'm gonna tell you right now, I rock with you. But no one can prove to me that I need credit, that I need debt. And so I'm willing to have the conversation on both side. And so I'm always asking like, Hey, are you willing to have the conversation? But I'll be honest, Louis, I haven't met too many ladies who are like, oh no, I have to have credit. I have to have other people's money. I have to use it. Most ladies, they just want to know that they have a man, that they're dating a man that if they were to settle down with can be the provider of the home. And that's cool. I mean, that's cool. But I don't think there's a wrong answer. I just want to know your mindset around money. And then if your mindset is a little different than mine's, I'm not done with you. I'm going to continue the conversation. But we're just going to see like, Hey, can we adjust? Sure. And here's the thing too. Are you adjusting just so we can date? Are you adjusting because this is something that you really want for yourself? And that's the only way it'll work. You're going to want to have to have this lifestyle just as much as myself.

Right.

And I'm very big on ownership.

Yeah.

Respectfully saying this, people who look like me, we don't own a lot. And I want to have an African-American black family that owns everything. And that's important for me.

What should someone do if they're considering dAting someone who's in debt. If they're like, man, I just love this person so much, but they got 130 grand of debt and they made some poor decisions.

Yeah. Yeah.

But man, the connection is so strong. The chemistry is there. Like, I'd be crazy not to explore this further. Yeah. But man, I gotta deal with all this debt.

I mean, I think there's nothing wrong with dating an individual with debt. You gotta go back to, hey, are they comfortable with this debt or are they aggressively attacking this debt? And if you find someone that's comfortable in this debt, you need to understand why are they comfortable?

If they're like, I'm taking action, I'm getting out of this, I made some poor decisions.

That's a different... You're like, okay, you're on the right track. I can rock with you on that. I can rock with you. And the moment we say, I do, oh, now my bank account is going to be your bank account and we can just cut the check. And now we are debt free. So, I believe that once we get married, I'm, if you have debt, I'm no longer debt free.

Wow.

So it's like, hey, babe, we are together. We came together as one. Let's go to now our checking account and let's cut a check to get us out of debt while we are dating. You're still in debt. And I just want to see, okay, are you aggressively or do you have a game plan for this debt? Are you maximizing this single season of yours, or are you buying the wigs, are you buying the clothes, the purses, or are you taking this opportunity to spend as much money as you possibly can while you're single? Because I think in relationships what we do is we don't maximize a single season correctly. What we do is we have a good time, we're traveling, we're balling out, we're doing this, we're doing that, but we're not actually utilizing all of our resources to bring less baggage to the table. And I think for me, it's like I'm asking myself, okay, Anthony, what baggage can you eliminate now while you're single? So, when you get to the table, you come with more assets, you come with more wisdom, you come with more knowledge, more experience, more peace, more joy, and less baggage and less pain. And so, I want to see is she maximizing and stewarding the single season correctly? Is she taking advantage of no responsibility, no kids if she doesn't have kids, no major bills, just her debt. So if she's making 75, $50,000 a year, okay, is she putting 10 of that towards 20 of that towards paying off her debt? Or is she taking that 10,000 and buying the latest Chanel purse? If she's taking that 10,000 going to Hawaii with her girlfriends, is she taking that 10,000 going out to the latest and greatest concerts? Or is she saying, you know what? Hey, I'm gonna enjoy life a little bit, but I'm really focused over here. And that's that's what I want to see. And that's just not from her, but that's even for men as well. Ladies, look at whoever you tend to date, make sure that they're maximizing their single season. And it's not just money. What are they watching? Do they watch Lewis? Do they watch Anthony O'Neal? Do they watch other people in POC? Are they learning something? Who are they surrounding themselves with? Are they always around friends who are just doing Dumb stuff or are they around friends and they're reading together, they're stretching each other, they're starting businesses together. How are they maximizing and stewarding that single season? How are they growing this? And if they do that, I'm fine. If she comes to me and she got $200,000 in debt, Lewis, but I see that she's working hard, that's my wife and I got her back.

Have you seen Scenarios where women make a lot more than the men they're with. Absolutely. And they're just as happy.

Absolutely.

As if the man was making more.

I mean, I've seen a scenario where the woman is making a lot more money than the man and they are happy. And I think it's only because that man is still providing. He is still working. He's not a lazy man. He's not sitting at home. He's not, you know, Working an eight to five job and coming home and playing the Xbox or the PlayStation. No, the man is out here really trying to build something that is great for him and his family. And honestly, he's producing. You see the fruit of his labor. So you don't just see the potential of him, but you see him actually producing something. Those ladies, I believe, are happy. But I think we run into the problem where these ladies are out here busting their butts. and these guys are just out here lazy.

Right.

That's where it doesn't work.

It can't work. I mean, it won't work because.

A.

Man can't be respected if he's not working hard. He can't be. And I don't think there's nothing wrong with the woman making more money than the man or the man making more. What's our vision and where are we going? Prime example is my brother-in-law when I first met my brother-in-law I know he's gonna be watching this. I love you, man. You know, he quit his job to stay at home with my firstborn nephew, Theo, and my sister was a school teacher, so she was the breadwinner for a while. And I was like, what in the world? This is not normal. And what I noticed about them two was they were aligned on the vision. Now today, he's built a huge business. and now my sister is at home with him building their business, taking care of their family. So it doesn't really matter what works for you and your family, as long as you all have a vision, as long as you are aligned going there. And the man is producing and providing.

And adding value.

Exactly. You know, and when I say providing, he may not be the breadwinner, but like what you said, he's bringing value and substance to the table.

Why is it that a man cannot be respected unless he's working hard?

I don't know. That's a good question for the ladies. But I mean, I think, man, I mean, we're made to work. I don't know if I could respect one of my brothers who are lazy. Because like, you,'re a man, step up to the plate and get the job done. You know, I'm tired of seeing our ladies going out here, when you look at it, ladies are the number one rising entrepreneur. It really go down to it as a minority lady, right? These are ladies who are single, who have kids, who have an eight-to-five job, and starting a business. So, our single ladies can do all that. And men can't do that?

Mm-. Right, come on, step up, yeah. Do you think men respect women who don't work? Can women be respected if they're not contributing financially in this modern era?

I know I could. Yeah, I mean, I kind of want my wife to want to stay at home, to be honest.

Why is that?

I value family. You know, I want, I remember growing up and my mom working three jobs, my dad working, you know, long hours and mom and dad not around. I remember those hours. I'm not saying that my wife has to do that, but what I am saying is I just want to make sure that my kids, see their parents, that we are present inside of their lives. And that's important to me. But if she says, Hey, you know what? I really enjoy doing what I do for a career. Cool, great. Let's figure out how do we still make sure the value of our home is still there. That we, this is our priority. Raising our kids, growing a healthy group of kids is still a priority. But I could absolutely respect a woman who doesn't work.

If a couple or a married couple does not create a money vision, what happens to the relationship?

It's gonna fumble. Absolutely.

The relationship wealth?

Absolutely. The number one cause for divorce is not because of the lack of money, it's because of lack of vision and thought behind money. It's, well we didn't really have a plan, we weren't on the same page. So she's over here spending this, he's over here spending that, he just bought this car, she just bought this, and now we come back, it's time to pay bills. We don't have money to pay the bills because we didn't have a vision for the money. You know, it's we're over here spending this, we're getting by, we're living paycheck to paycheck. Now it's time for our kids to go to college, we don't have the funds, but we didn't have a vision. Now the kids are out of college, we're racked up in debt, now we are tired of renting, now we want to purchase a home, we get denied for a home because we didn't have a vision for our Now retirement comes and we got all this debt from kids college, we bought all these nice things, we're still renting, we don't have any money in retirement. What happened? Well, 20 years ago you didn't have a vision. And so where there is no vision, that's where people perish. You have to have a vision for your life and for your money. And the two have to be congruent. They got to work hand in hand. If the vision is, Hey, We want to send our kids off to college. Okay, cool. How's that in the vision, AKA the budget for your money? We want to build a house. Cool, great. How's that in the vision for your money? We want to go off on a vacation. One of my ultimate dreams, I'm getting excited, I'm sorry. One of my ultimate dreams when it comes to me and my wife is when the kids are gone and I retire, I want to go on two.

Vacations, each one of them six months.

Long out of the country. Wow. That's the vision.

That's great.

I gotta write it down. And then I gotta put habits and systems in place to get us there.

Right.

If I don't have that vision, I won't have systems and habits in place to get there.

Right.

And if married couples do not do that, they will not win.

Let's say there's a man who's made a lot of wealth. And he meets a partner that he wants to marry who's making 50 to 100 grand a year. And he's got millions in the bank. What's your thoughts on merging bank accounts, prenuptial agreements, the challenging conversation about, is it my money that I've generated my whole life here, Now it's your money or what should that conversation be like?

I mean, if you've accumulated that much wealth, a prenup is probably a good conversation to have. How you have that conversation is not after you're in love, it's not right before or after you propose. That is a conversation that you're having while you're dating.

Really?

Absolutely. You need to have that conversation with your partner.

So you're not sweeping the rug underneath them at the end or something.

You don't want to fall in love and then next thing you know, you propose and y'all planning a wedding and then hey, babe. Here's a prenup. That is not a good move. I do believe wealthy people should have a conversation around prenups. And the prenups, it could be a good healthy thing depending on the state that you're in. It's like, hey, Either you're going to get 50/50 or the state's going to decide if there is a divorce. So, why not in the very beginning of your relationship have the hard conversation when you're in love, when you both are being very fair and that may be the last time you have the conversation. That is my prayer, that is my hope. But it's like hey, inside of that prenup I would suggest that she go sit down with her lawyer separate from him and saying hey, what are some things I need to put in place for myself? I'm aware of certain couples who actually for every year the woman actually was with the man, she got X amount of dollars added to that prenuptial agreement because of XYZ. He was totally cool with that. And then for another couple was the prenup was only good for 10 years and then it was null and void. And so I think a good conversation around prenups in a healthy way is actually good. But I would do that while you're dating. before you both are emotionally connected with each other. Say, hey, this is where I'm at. I just wanna be honest with you upfront before we go down this road because I'm really feeling you and I believe you're really feeling me and I really want this to win. But what's your thoughts around prenups? And just let her answer that question. And you know what? Some people may be like, heck no. Then you gotta make decision from there.

That's information, yeah.

Exactly. And then some may say, well, I'm not really, aware of prenups? What is it? Then explain to them what the prenup is and the key thing is have the conversation to where they know hey, the prenup doesn't just cover me it also covers you as well. One of my friends just asked me...

What if you build a business you start blowing up and you... Yeah, exactly.

And one of my friends actually just went through a divorce and they had a prenup and this is what she said. The prenup actually allowed me to focus solely on our kids because I already knew what I was getting from the marriage.

I understand.

And so, she was like, I was actually at peace because now I was like, all right, cool, who gets the kids? And that was the conversation. She said the divorce was hard, but I knew in a moment we said, we're going to get a divorce. Okay, cool. This is what I'm getting. All right, I know I can clear it.

It was clarity.

Boom. Exactly.

You still have to deal with the mess and the heartache and the pain.

And opinions about the people and the questions of other people, but at least you know you can leave this relationship peacefully and you know what you're leaving it with. And so I think prenups can be very good. Now, if both y'all making $50,000 a year, why are we having this conversation? But if you're a multimillionaire and you have this huge brand and this huge business, that protects your legacy. And that's an important conversation to have. And I think if you have this huge brand, this huge wealth, that's also going down to stewardship for your kids kids. And so prenups, I'm all for them, you know, when it makes sense on either side. It's just how you have the conversation is what's gonna be a little difficult.

So let's say you're both making around the same amount of money and you get married. What's your thoughts on how you should manage the money? Who should manage the money? And the conversations around accounts and you.

Know, I think that when you get married, there is. There is no. There are no secret accounts. It's. Here's one house account. And then after you have the main account, I do believe, like, hey, you and your partner can have, like, their own little spending account, and then you have your own savings accounts. I do believe in that.

Right.

But when it comes down to, like, who manages the money, who's ever the best person at managing money, that's it. If that's her, she manages the money. If it's. If it's you, she manages the money. If it's your partner, that partner manages the money. Whoever is the best person at that, they do it. Now, I think both need to be having a conversation. I think both need to be having the money conversation at the end of every single month. Hey, this is what we did this month. This is where we're going next month. What are some things we want to do? You need to have a meeting every single month about your money going into the next month. And so, I'm looking forward to that. Hey, babe, what do you want to do? What do the kids need? What are some things we want to buy next month? We need to have a very detailed plan with that. Now, the execution of that budget or of that vision money may be the best person who is honestly better in that area. But everyone should know how much money we have, what are we aiming for and where are we going? But you should have it. I'm not a fan Louis of and you're smiling, but I'm not a fan. I'm not a fan of married couples having, okay, I'm going to pay for this, you're going to pay for that, here's my money out of my account, here's, you know, this. No, everything should be in one account. I was actually coaching a couple the other day because he found out that his wife, his newlywed wife, actually had her own private account. So he was giving her money to spend. They all had their own spending allowance. Well, she was taking that money, putting it into a separate account that he had no idea of. And so I was like, well, hey, yeah, we shouldn't be hiding from our spouses. We should be very clear upfront around what's going on with the money, what are we doing with it? And it's a hard conversation to have. But I know me and my wife will have joint accounts. Yeah, and I will be able to see what's in her account should be able to see what's in my spending account But we don't touch the primary account unless we both agreed.

Yeah, that's good. What is the thing that's holding you back from the next level of your financial wealth building?

Huh, that's a good question youn know what? You know, that's a good question, Lewis and not now you got me thinking Man, you got me, you got me really being vulnerable here. I may not be ready for it, Louis.

Ready for what? The next level?

Of wealth, yeah. Really? I honestly may not be ready for that amount of money being a single man.

Why is that?

Don't know. When I really sit back and think about it is, I don't know. it's what I have right now. I'm stewarding well. What I have right now is enough for this season. But when I think about that next level for me and wealth, well, that's a lot.

And.

God may be saying to me, I need you to get everything in this season on this level before you get to the next level. It's a little. It's a little fearful. that the things I've been able to accomplish today, it's like, whoa, you're really here, Anthony. You've really just spent seven years, six years of your life traveling around the world with Dave and Impacting People. Wow, you really are making this kind of money. And I've made some bad decisions with my own money because of the fear of like, man, I've never had this before. And I think for me, it's about, all right, I gotta really, really get that out of my head, which is why I'm very big with making sure that I have the right people around me. So that when they see things starting to fall and slip, they be like, yo, hey, yo, hey, yo. And I think that's important. I'm the money guy, but I'm still human, and I still make mistakes. and I think that's important for all people to understand that even experts make mistakes in their own particular space.

Yeah.

And I have no problem admitting the fact that, hey, sometimes I'm tempted. Hey, sometimes I've made some bad decisions with my money, which is why I'm. I'm more and more surrounding myself with the right people. which goes back to the other question is I gotta make sure that my partner is, she understands that as well because this is a huge, huge decision that I'm making. Huge decision.

Huge.

That she will be making because now we both are going to this next level. And thank you for that question. 'Cause I think now I'm gonna go back and talk to my therapist about that.

I'm gonna do that.

I'm literally sitting here thinking like, man, are you ready?

And what would it take for you to become ready?

Yeah, like, am I ready? Am I ready for that next level? I know I'm ready to impact more people. I know I'm ready to influence more people, but am I ready for the income that that will bring? And it's like, I'm excited about it. But I'm like, man, are you ready? That's a lot.

I think a lot of people, when they're not ready, if they get a lot of money before they're ready, they make poor decisions with it.

But see, you know, here's my thing, though, Louis. It's not just about the money in my pocket. That income brings more staff members. Those are staff members that my team, that I am responsible for, those are families. that I am responsible for, that I have to steward well and make all the right decisions so that way now my decisions doesn't impact just Anthony anymore. It impacts all these people. And it's like, whoo, that's a burden, you know, that you have to really, really carry.

The weight, I've talked about this so much in the last couple months on the show that I don't think people understand the weight and the pressure of success or growth or more Resources coming your way. And if you're not prepared for it, it's gonna feel like a massive weight. So it's learning how to balance the weights. With all the success and the accolades and the acknowledgement and the audience comes a certain amount of pressure. And I think, it's funny because I ask a lot of people, what's your biggest fear? Is it the fear of failure, the fear of success, or the fear of other people's opinions? and a lot of people say the fear of success is what holds them back from actually going after their thing they want.

Yeah.

Because of the responsibility of people now wanting more from them that they're, you know, or their family thinking that they're leaving them or they're too good for them or whatever it is.

So my biggest fear is me. It's my flesh. I can make money. I just. If I can beat me, if I can tell myself, know if I can say, hey, you're not ready, man, I'll be all right. But sometimes you get in the mirror. You hear people saying, yo, Anthony, you can do it. You can do it. You can do it. But inside your life, maybe not right now. Not that I can't do it, but maybe right now I should just move a little bit slower.

Yeah.

And I think sometimes keep it in deeper. Exactly.

Yeah.

And I think sometimes successful people were scared to admit. You know what? Let me just take just some small steps right now. And that's one thing I've been telling myself like, Hey, my team is growing. And it's scary, but I'm okay. All right, let's just go a little slower. I turned down something that was real, real big. And it was big, but I literally told them, I'm not ready for that right now. somebody would have said yes, they would have got into that season and I would have fumbled it. And because I fumbled that, now I got to go back. Now it's going to take me even longer to get back there because then now it would have been public if I would have failed in that area. And then now no one will trust me again. So I said, hey, right now I'm just starting off in this season and, and really shifting over here. Let me wait a little bit. Let me build. a foundation first before I bring on something of that magnitude. And I'll never forget that particular individual and company said that was probably one of the most mature thing that they've ever heard from an influencer.

That's cool.

Because it was like, Hey, most people say, yeah, let's do it. And then get there, fumble a lot, make a lot of mistakes, and try and make excuses of those mistakes rather than saying, Hey, let's revisit this a year from now. Mm-. And I've made that mistake a lot in the past. And I refuse to do that again. Because when I get to that season, when I get to that level, I want to stay there.

Mm-.

And I want to do well.

You don't want to fall back.

Exactly.

Yeah.

And I think sometimes you gotta say, you know what? I'm not ready.

That's true.

And I have no problem saying, I'm not ready.

That's good.

Because I think me saying, No, today is saying yes tomorrow.

That's great, man. You've got a lot of great content out there. Your YouTube's been blowing up. You're Anthony O'Neil over on Instagram and Twitter and YouTube, anthonyoneill.com you've got a new course, the Singles Blueprint, eight pillars to maximize your single season, gain clarity on your life's vision and start building your legacy right now, which I think if you're single, this is the time to get clarity. so you don't just keep dating people and wasting energy and effort. You really get clear on what you want, why you want it, and then how to get there. Then go to your website and grab that, anthonyoneill.com, and YouTube, if you're doing once a week, it's been blowing up, but hopefully this year you'll be doing twice a week. Absolutely. You've got a lot of great content over there. People should be subscribing to you.

What else should we be checking out of yours that you've got out there? I mean, that's the thing I'm focusing on this year. Going to two shows a week on my YouTube channel, launching this course, it's gonna be the first course that has nothing to do with money. It's everything to do about just maximizing our single season. I didn't maximize my 20s. I wasted my 20s. I blew it away. And most wealthy people who I've seen, they've maximized a lot of seasons. So I'm literally walking single people through, Hey, here are the eight pillars you need to focus on. going to make you a better individual. And when you focus on these eight things, you will find your spouse. You will be able to build your wealth. You will be able to accomplish so many things, but let's focus on us. What are the things on the inside of us we need to focus on? So launching that course, focusing on really getting this two shows. I'm trying to get on your level. I can't do four just yet. A week. But my team and I said, Hey, we're ready to go to two. We've been doing one show and we've been able to grow massively, but our goal is to get the crossover 600,000 subscribers this year. So we know we got to get the two. And then number three is, man, I'm actually going to take a group of people to Israel. Group of millennials. Just go over to Israel, learn about money, learn about our tradition and heritage over there. So I'm looking forward to that. It's about laying the foundation. and just really influencing and impacting a lot of millennials and a lot of minorities.

I love that, man.

Love it.

This is a question I asked everyone at the end called the Three Truths. So imagine it is your last day on earth. You've been building your wealth generation, you've got the marriage, you've got the family, you've got the grandkids, all that stuff. You've accomplished what you want to accomplish, but it's the last day. For whatever reason, you've got to take all of your written audio and video messages with you. So, no one has access to your wisdom anymore. Even though I know that you're going to pass it on. This is hypothetical.

-Yeah, yeah. I got you.

-And you only get to leave behind three lessons that you've learned. All the lessons you learned from your life. This is all you get to leave behind to your family and to the world. What would be those three lessons or I like to call it the three truths?

Here go the truth. number one is there's a difference between believing in God and knowing God. No God. Number two will be the caliber of your future will be determined by the choices you made today. Number three is focus on influencing and impacting people. If you focus on those two things, that equals income. No God, the caliber of your future will be determined by the choices that you made today. So make the right and healthy choices as much as possible every single day. Influence plus being impactful equals income. Influence plus impact equals income.

I love this man. Anthony, I want to acknowledge you for a moment for your journey for constantly showing up for people, for getting yourself out of the car and out of debt to start educating yourself on how to teach other people how to do the same thing. I think it's a challenging thing to do and it's a challenging journey to go on, but you've been doing it in a beautiful way and you keep showing up. Keep showing up and I love your honesty about your single season and figuring these things out and, you know, lost the wife that you thought would have been great for you and now you're you're rebuilding and you're creating something new for yourself. So I acknowledge you for all of them, man. It's a beautiful journey and I'm excited to see what you create moving forward. My final question, what's your definition of greatness?

Greatness. Definition of greatness is, for me, you put everything into your journey. You put everything into what you could. And because of that, you're great. as long as you gave it your own, as long as you gave it your best effort, that's greatness. You gotta do these three things. You gotta start trading time for money. You gotta start learning how to make your money work for you. You gotta learn how to give value to people. I didn't learn that message, the value part, I didn't learn that till I started my business. And I was like, I had never heard nothing, like that was like scripture to me hearing that, right?