Jillian Turecki explains why you keep ending up with emotionally unavailable partners and what it means about what you're looking for. She argues you need to stop strategizing for someone's interest and find a relationship where you can just be yourself.
I tell people all the time who have that pattern of always just dating emotionally unavailable people or people that have been wrong for them. And usually that person doesn't have the self esteem necessary to be in a relationship with someone who is going to respect them and love them. But I tell them just go towards boring. Go towards that person so that you can have an experience of being in the presence of someone who you could potentially date and you can just be totally yourself, 100% yourself. Yeah, no errors. No strategizing to get someone to be more interested. Yeah, you can flirt and do all that fun stuff, but no strategizing to get someone to be more interested in you. Just you. I mean that's like revolutionary for some people.
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