Lewis HowesYour Personal 24/7 Greatness Coach

Why Everyone Likes You, But No One Loves You

21 Oct 2025 · 0 min

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In this segment, the speaker recounts a teenage experience of striving to be liked and popular by everyone in seventh grade. He describes how he adopted multiple personas—different versions of himself in a hip‑hop dance class, church, dating, and friendships—to fit each social group. While this strategy initially succeeded, it became exhausting and unsustainable, leading to a breakdown after six months. The speaker reflects on the emotional toll, acknowledges the harm caused to past partners, and expresses remorse for not having known better at the time.

I remember getting into seventh grade and being like, I'm gonna be liked and popular by every single person in this school and I will do everything to fit in with every single person. The Bea you would see in a hip hop dance class would be a completely different BA you would see in church with my friend or dating my boyfriend or whatever it would be. And by the way, it worked. I was miss high school until it didn't work. Six months later. I can't keep the game up any longer. To my exes. I'm sorry I didn't know better.