#4: Emily Cote Kirkpatrick, Virtual Assistant Coach

Okay, well, I'm going to appreciate myself then and give myself the opportunity to run a business that I want to be involved in, that I care about.

So hello everyone, welcome back to the infamous, um, Aligned Coach interview series. I think this is, um, episode 3 now. I don't know, should I call it an episode or— yeah, I don't know. But this is our third interview so far. We have Emily Kirkpatrick. She is a virtual assistant coach. Um, so yeah, welcome on, Emily. I'm super glad to be here.

I'm excited to be here.

Yay! So tell us what— tell us who you are, what you do, give us all the details. We want to know everything.

Okay, so I'm Emily, as Lindsay has just said, and I am a virtual assistant coach. So basically I help new and aspiring virtual assistants like figure out how they're going to have their business launch, build, scale their virtual assistant business. And so just over 3 years ago, I started my own virtual assistant business and I— it was not easy, to be honest. I didn't like take any courses or have a coach or anything at first and I just kind of tried to figure it all out on on my own. And, um, long story short, 3 years later, I'm like, no, now I want to help people do that because I know it was difficult. And I now, like, have the knowledge and experience to share, you know, every step of the way. This is what you should do. This is what you should— this is what you need to do to learn these skills. This is what you need to do to, um, find clients. And I'm kind of like more, more importantly, what, where not to look for clients, because there's lots and lots of, uh, like virtual assistant programs out there that teach you everything. And like coaches that'll like just teach you the skills, but then when it comes to finding clients, you're kind of lost. So that's something that I really like to support people with and help them with. And just, it's, it wasn't easy. And, but I did eventually figure it out. And honestly, when I finally invested in a coach and a program, that's when my business started to boom. But so that's what, that's what I'm doing now. I'm helping people who were just like me and like taking the guesswork out of it. And like, it's still hard work. You're not just going to say, all right, I'm going to be a virtual assistant and now I am one. Um, but it doesn't have to be lonely and scary and hard. And that's what I'm here for.

Oh, I love that. That was so good. I like what you said. I help people who are just like me. And I think that's such a good synopsis of what a coach is, right? I help people that are just like me, that were just like me. We were in the same shoes. I know what it's like to be there. You know what it's like to be overwhelmed and not knowing where and how to get clients or how much to charge or what to do. Right.

Yeah.

And you literally teach them that. You're like, come here, come here, little children. I got you. Yeah, exactly.

And I would have loved it when I first started. The first thing I did was I took a program and like it taught me all the skills, which is fantastic, they're important. You need to know how to do things before you can be like, all right, this is a service I offer. You need to know programs and how to, you know, make everything run with your social media, things like that. But then after that I was like, oh wait, people aren't just coming to me now. I actually have to find my clients.

Oh wow, that was a revelation, huh?

Oh yeah. Big, big, big revolution.

Yeah, it's kind of like with any business, there's this idea that like, okay, I'm just gonna like— even with like a brick-and-mortar business, all right, I'm just gonna like put my sign on my storefront and people are just gonna come to my shop, right? And that's not the way it works, right? Like, you've got to like put in the work. You've gotta, you know, advertise, market, put yourself out there, network with other people that are in the same field, you know, put your name on. Yeah. What do you think helped you? So as a virtual assistant, for any virtual assistants or aspiring VAs that are watching this, Um, what do you think helped you gain traction? Like, how did you find clients?

Really putting myself out there on social media and like showing up. So, um, not only just like having a nice looking Instagram feed with, you know, I did things like— yeah, exactly. Um, but really putting myself out there. So I went and into Facebook groups every single day. And I would post in Facebook groups every day, and I would introduce myself first and then, you know, start giving little tips like, you need to—

how—

want to know how to organize your calendar? I want to know how to organize your inbox? Or just little things like, you can unsubscribe from emails that you no longer want to receive. And people then started messaging me, and also I would like message people as well. And the thing that really I learned was how important it is to develop a relationship before going in and being like, so here's this post in a Facebook group. Hey, I'm Emily. I'm a virtual assistant. I offer this, this, this, and this is why you should hire me. No, people don't get like, they don't really want to do that. And you know what? Sometimes it'll work.

Yeah.

Mostly not.

Right.

And so it was like putting myself out there, showing up and building relationships behind the scenes, like in my messages. Yep. And then when people are ready for a virtual assistant or they need someone to do something, you know, they're like, oh wait, I've been chatting with Emily for the last couple weeks or a couple months because it's not fast either, right? It, uh, takes time.

But yep, that's one of my favorite sayings: it's a marathon, not a sprint, right? And if you're really building relationships— and this is not just for VA business, this is for any business, this is for coaching business, this is for I have a ton of like network marketers, like multi-level marketers that are on my Facebook. They're probably watching this, but this is for this business as well. It's about the long run. It's about developing the relationships, building up that trust. It's not about the cold, hard, fast sell, right? It's about the long haul, you know? And yeah, and the same is true. So not only with your virtual assistant business, but also now as you're growing your coaching business, Um, so what made you make the shift? I know that you want to, you know, help people not be overwhelmed. You want to give them this balance between like how to find clients but also how to implement systems and operations. So what was like the, the motivator for you to really make that switch?

So I think it had a lot to do with the pandemic. Um, I had two friends that lost their jobs in like April, and, uh, they both were like, okay, well Maybe they came to me separately. They don't even know each other. And they were like, maybe I should look into this and to being a virtual assistant. And so I actually like helped them. And now they're both like virtual assistants who are working as much as they want to be. And it just like, it felt really good. So it made me realize like, okay, wait, there's, there's more to this. I do love virtual assistant work. I love the freedom, like the time freedom that I have. But there's a little bit more. And I was just like, this is it. This is what I need to do. This is what I feel called to do right now. And it has just been so, so rewarding since I've been doing it.

I love it. You're like, this is it. This is just what I'm called to do and I'm just gonna do it.

Yeah.

Yeah. So there was, and I like that because there's no one that's ever gonna say, okay, this is the perfect time. This is the perfect moment. I think that a lot of times whenever we're making big scary decisions, We like to think that there's like a big sign that's gonna like flash across the ceiling, that's gonna fall across this, across the sky, that's gonna say, all right, it's it, this is it, go time, you know, quit your job, okay, start your business, go back to school, um, you know, break up with the boyfriend, or like whatever the case is, right, of like these big decisions that we're making. There's not always going to be like a big blinking sign, you know. Yeah, it's just you trusting. It's just you trusting that like, hey, this is, this is the next step for me and I don't really know what it's going to hold. Um, but this is it. So, okay, cool. So you started just kind of like informally coaching your friends to start their virtual assistant business and right now you have like a group program going, right?

Yes, exactly.

Okay, cool. So you're helping them start their businesses. What, if anything, would you tell a, you know, a person or a woman or anyone that's wanting to start their coaching business? They want to help people, right? Like, what would you tell them?

I would tell them to just start. Like, believe in yourself and just start. There's— what we were saying before— there's never going to be a perfect time. You're never going to have it all figured out. Like, don't wait until You're like, okay, I have this plan and I, you don't need a business plan. You need to have some ideas, you need to follow through with them, but like just go for it. And I wish that I had followed that when I first became a virtual assistant because for like 3 years before I did, I was not happy with my job. I was like, I need to get out. I know I don't want to do this anymore. I want to be around. I had like, my son was like 2 at the time and I was like, I want to be around more with him. And it took me so long to figure out or to be ready and like, okay, fine, I'm going to do this now, even though I knew that's what I wanted to do. But like, just go for it, take the leap, jump far in, you know, with everything. And like, how long did you stay in that like in-between phase? 3 years.

3 years? Yeah, 3 years that you didn't want to be there. Did you know that you wanted to be like a virtual assistant?

No, I was— I didn't know at first. Probably like for 2 years I didn't know I wanted to be a virtual assistant. I tried a couple other things. I like became a certified doula. I, um, what else did I do? Like, I was just like applying for jobs not in my field. I was a preschool teacher at this point in my life. I was applying for like administrative jobs. I knew I was like, I think I want to do something in admin after I did the doula thing. And I was like, well, those hours aren't gonna work for me. I had like a little child at home and was like, I'm not going to leave him in the middle of the night. And so yeah, it was 3 years of being like, I can't, I don't want to do this anymore. And then about 2 years into that phase, I figured out, I like discovered that virtual assistants were a thing. I didn't even know. And fortunately I had some of like the administrative background because I used to, I used to run a daycare. So I I did like all the backend stuff in there and, um, I just started like looking into it and downloading all the freebies.

Yeah, our best friend Google and freebies. Yeah, and our good old email address that we exchanged.

Exactly, exactly.

I love that. Okay, so then, so did you start your VA work and then you quit your job, or did you just like go cold turkey and quit, and then you started? How did that work?

I have a bit of a different situation. I didn't really do either of those. So I was pregnant, and where I live, when you're pregnant, if you work with children, you get put on like a preventative leave by the government. So, excuse me, so that's when I started it. Um, so that was like 3 and a half years ago. I was like, okay, I'm just gonna start there.

What is preventative leave? What are they preventing you from?

A number of things. They don't want you to get sick. Um, they were preventing me from getting Fifth's disease, to be specific. Okay. They don't want anything to harm you or your baby. So it's interesting, you know, like, it's, it's only kids up to age of 5. You work— have to work with kids up to age of 5, or like kids with special needs.

Um, but not everyone has to go on the leave, just if you work in that— in those settings?

Yes, exactly.

Okay, okay. I'm like, wait a minute, I don't know how I feel about this.

Even nurses— even nurses where I live go on this leave. It's interesting.

Like, is it mandatory? Like, you have to go on the leave?

It's pretty much up to your employer. From my experience, it was The employers don't want to be held accountable for anything.

Do they pay you to leave?

The government pays you 90% of your salary.

How, how long do you go on said leave?

From the second you find out you're pregnant until you have your baby. What?

Yeah. Yeah. Girl. And where do you live?

I live in Montreal, Quebec, Canada.

So you live in Canada. So meanwhile, in the US, we are like begging for 6 weeks. Of like paid maternity leave.

Yeah, and we get a year of paid maternity leave after the baby's born. I know, it's, it's crazy to me that how different it is. That—

yeah, that's wild. Okay, so you were on your leave because you got pregnant, and you're like, all right, I'm home with my baby, like I'm home taking care of myself. You're like, all right, let me start researching this VA work, like let me see what this is about. Okay.

And I just like fell in love with it. And so this is the point where I was like getting all the freebies and downloading everything and just like, okay, what do I want to do? I now I know I want to be a virtual assistant. What do I want to do? So I like started practicing things like I started, I learned Canva. I like taught how to, taught myself how to use Canva. I practice my writing skills because I can't, you can't actually work when you're on this leave, you can't get paid. So I knew that like I had some time to figure things out. And then after my baby was born, I was going to start. So yeah, I just, I joined like Facebook groups for virtual assistants, started following virtual assistants on Instagram, checking out the different services people offered, the different kinds of clients you can work with. And I was like, yeah, this is what I'm going to do. So after my daughter was born, then I started just like really slowly doing some work. And then I quit my job when she was like 11 months old. I told them I wasn't coming back.

Wow.

I'm like, I'm really fortunate that I had that situation because I know a lot of people want to quit their jobs but can't afford it yet or have lost their job and are like living on, you know, really like small income at the time and want to invest in a course or a program. So I know that I'm lucky and it kind of all fell into place for me at the right time.

Yep.

And that's why I want to help people, right?

It did. And, and you took advantage of it, you know? Like, you can't, you can't knock your circumstances. Like, oh no, no, I'm not knocking them. Yeah, like, girl, like, you— I think that there are little blessings, there are silver linings wherever we are open to, to see them, wherever we're open to receive them. And, um, you know, for example, like, I had put in my notice at my teaching job, um, right before COVID hit. It probably like 2 weeks before— I mean, COVID was obviously already here, but everyone thought like fake. And, um, so we got a call. It was a Friday at school, and it was before spring break, and they were like, okay, well, we're gonna release today, we're gonna take a 2-week break, we're gonna see you all back in 2 weeks. So we're just thinking, okay, cool, like we're gonna go out of break for 2 weeks. And, and like maybe 2 weeks before that, I had put in my notice with my job And I was like, okay, I won't be renewing my teaching job, you know, I won't be renewing my contract come the next year. And so we go on break for 2 weeks, and in my— it's so funny looking back now, it was not at the time, but in my head I'm thinking, okay, I'm going to use this 2 weeks and I'm gonna get to work on my business, and I'm gonna do all these things, and I'm just gonna have all this time. Oh my gosh, did I have a rude awakening. I, I mean, first of all, we had our kids home with us. Daniel got sent home shortly after, so they shut down his corporate job, so he's home. All 4 of us are home and it's like, oh my gosh, I, you know, I, I worked on my business probably half the amount of time than what I was working, like whenever I was actually working full-time, because now, now I'm momming 24/7. We have no daycare. Daniel's home, he needs attention. We all need attention, right? So, so yeah, it was crazy, but, but to like see the silver lining in it, it was such confirmation because this is something I really don't— I haven't shared um, but I probably should. But right after I put in my notice, while I was on this break, you know, while we're all out for COVID, it was like this fear set in and I was like, holy crap, what am I doing? Um, I need to ask for my job back. Like, oh my gosh, we don't know what's going to happen with the world. Like, at least if we go into a recession, um, you know, if you just— we had no idea. Think about like March and April, we had no idea what was going to happen. And so I almost, um, asked my job back. I actually applied for like this sales job making like $80,000 a year. I got the job, ended up turning it down though. Yeah. Um, so yeah, so basically it was like I saw the silver lining in it though because it was confirmation that I was on the right track because seeing what the— what we were going through as a teacher and like having to teach virtually and like doing milestone or, or, um reading tests and like all this crap over the internet, right?

Yeah, I don't even know how that's possible.

It was total— it was total crap. So to all of my teacher friends, I love y'all and I freaking respect what you're doing, um, and it— but it was confirmation that like that was not where I was supposed to be, you know? So, so I— you know, it's, it's like you said, you— we're not knocking our circumstances or whatever, but we just have to find the blessings where we can, you know?

Yeah.

Wow.

And I feel like, and maybe that, maybe it's the same for you. I don't know. I feel like because of my circumstances that I'm like, it was so hard when I wasn't like just quit my job or getting ready to quit my job. That, that's why I want to help people. Like that's a big part of it because I know how scary it is and I know like if they're about to quit their job to become a virtual assistant, like that's huge. That's a big step. That's a really big decision.. And so like, I can help you do that, you know, without the— like, I was so lost without being lost. I'm like, no, no, it doesn't have to be like that. And there is a way to do it all at the same time, learn the skills, figure out how to get clients, determine, like, become clear on everything. Um, yeah, I feel like my circumstances really like helped me with that, being like, I know I was there and even though I wasn't having to leave a job and give up my salary because I wasn't receiving it at that time. Don't worry, you'll be okay. Yeah.

Yeah. So I like to ask people, I like to go kind of deep. So if you don't mind, what do you, what do you think in your life like prepared you for this moment? Because entrepreneurship is hard. Like, let's just be honest to anyone thinking that like it's going to be a walk in the park to start your own business. It's not right. Like, there are ups and downs. What do you think, like, prepared you for this inadvertently?

You know, I think it's like the years and years of working for crappy people. Like, I just, I just knew. I had like one really fantastic job, and then when I left that job, it was like 5 years of, oh my God, I can't do this. Like, I can't work for people. I like— and I want to work with people, right? Like, no.

And I—

and the whole— it was like, there was just one really pivotal moment when I told my boss— when I found out I was pregnant with my second child, when I told my boss I was pregnant, she literally yelled at me. And I was like, okay, that's like the final straw. That's it. That is— that is my sign that I'm finished. I'm not going to be working for people anymore who are like, they don't care. Like, so many people are like, I don't care, I don't care about you, you're my employee. And I, I feel like I had one job where I felt appreciated as an employee. Every job I had other than that, I wasn't. Yeah, like, okay, well, I'm gonna appreciate myself then and give myself the opportunity to run a business that I want to be involved in, that I care about, and just not have to answer. I was like, I can't answer to people anymore. It was the whole like, I need to— I can't come to work today, my son is literally throwing up all over my house right now. Nope, you need to come.

Like, I remember feeling that like as a teacher, and I had a wonderful principal, I had a wonderful— I had wonderful like co-workers, teachers that worked alongside with me, but there was always this like guilt for, you know, not being there every single day, or for having to call out, or for having to miss work or whatever, um, because of my kids, or even because I was sick. Like, yeah, I was sick, you know, getting all those germs and stuff. But so I often felt guilt for that. So that's one thing that now that, like, I, I'm so, so grateful that— like, for example, last week Daniel had a LASIK appointment, and I was able to go to that. You know, I had to move a few things around on the calendar. I was able to be there for like 3 solid days, you know. Um, and I took our coaching call that night, um, and it was just like, it was, it was an eye-opening moment because I was like, look at us. Like, I have my kids here, I'm here, you're here, we're here together. I don't have to worry about putting out lesson plans. I'm not having to worry about, um, you know, texting the teachers to ask if my class is okay, or, or like coming back to a disaster, you know, because I have that freedom in my business. And now you have that as a coach and as a virtual assistant, you had that. So yeah, like what does, what does that mean to you and what does that mean to your family to have that freedom?

It's huge. It's huge to me. It's huge to my family. Like my kids are absolutely the reason I was like, no, I'm going to start this business now. Or not now. It was, they were the reason I knew that I was going to. Like, I just— it's, it's amazing. It's such a good feeling. Like, when I was— before I even became a mother, right, I'd like have these dreams of like, or visions of like walking my kids to the bus stop and picking them up and little things like that that seem so little, but to me they're big, and to my family they're big too. Like, the smile on my son's face when I go pick him up at the end of the day is incredible. And like, it's what I want to do. It's what I'm like, okay, I'm like, I'm a mom. I'm a mom first, absolutely 100%. And anything I can do to like be there for my family and make things better for my family, I'm going to do. Yeah. And like, just not having to worry when someone's sick is huge. Like, it's so nice.

Yep, absolutely. And it's just like a shift that you have to make in your own business, but you're not having to worry about like your boss or your coworkers or putting anyone else, you know, out or like, yeah, yeah, totally.

Um, I think with the right people too, like people understand, like I never had a client who was like, no, you need to do this today. Like people understand. And that's just not something I experienced until I started my own business.

Yeah.

That's awesome. Being like, oh, okay, that's no problem.

Yeah, so the freedom piece, like the freedom piece of it, we talk about it a lot. We talk about the time freedom and the financial freedom, right? We talk about that, but like actually experiencing it in the little moments, you know? Yeah, in the little moments. Like I have breakfast with Daniel most mornings now.

It's so nice.

And it's like even— and we actually go to the gym together most mornings. And that— oh my gosh, I— we like probably, we spent an average of say like an hour of 5 nights a week. So like an average of like 10 hours together before I quit my job a week, right? So a week we would spend 10 hours together. I mean, and now that's probably like tripled because of, you know, being like having that time in the morning, having more time at night because I'm not doing lesson plans, I'm not doing this, you know. So like it's not just about yourself, it's also about your relationships and about—

yeah, absolutely.

Like you said, like your kids smile seeing you in the afternoon picking, you know, you picking him up. Yeah, yeah. So that brings me to another funny point also. So you work from home and your kids still attend school, right? Or they attend daycare?

My son is in school, like elementary school, and my daughter's in daycare.

Yes.

And that's another thing, you don't have to keep your kids home, girl.

Girl, oh my God. So look, like mom to mom here, Yesterday I was about to lose it. I was like, oh my God, I'm so thankful for my daycare. Like, let me see who's watching. Miss Anna, if you're watching this, I'm so thankful for you. I— yeah, I had this, this moment last night where, um, you know, like that mom guilt I think tries to creep in sometimes where it's like, oh well, you work from home, like you should have your kids, you know, home with you. Like, there's no way I could do this. There's no way that— exactly, like, like, none. I mean, I did like a little Facebook Live this past weekend. I sell ornaments, you know, during the Christmas holidays, and people were like, Allison's running around half naked, Atlas is turning on the vacuum cleaner. I was like, oh my—

exactly, all day, every day. Like, it's just not possible. Yeah, to get work done, right?

Yep. So did you have to go through that? Like, did you try to keep your kids home with you while you were working from home?

How did that I did. So my daughter stayed home for the first 18 months of her life. And you know what, it was totally fine when she was a baby, because she slept or she'd lie on the floor and I'd like dangle toys in front of her face, right? And like, she, when she'd have like 2 good nap times a day, great. Like, it was, it was doable. I still have the guilt. I actually recently, my husband and I made a decision that my son is going to after-school care 3 days a week. And I really struggled with that because I was like, but I'm home, I shouldn't, he shouldn't have to. And it's, it's the guilt, right? It's the like, okay, yes, I'm home, but I have to get my work done. And I can't get my work done unless he comes home and I plunk him in front of the TV. But wait a second, this isn't working for me. Maybe I'm working too much. But then I'm like, no, I'm allowed to love to work. I'm allowed to, right? Like it's been a, it's been a back and forth for the last 3 years, but now I'm more like, you're allowed to love your job. And he's happier at the afterschool program. They're running around the playground of the school and like doing arts and crafts and, you know, socializing. Um, but it's— the guilt is real and it's there and it sneaks up on me sometimes and I'm like, no, you don't have to feel this. Like, allow myself to feel it and then let it go away because I'm so glad that you said that.

Like, you, you are allowed to love your job, right? Like, you are allowed. I freaking love what I do, Emily. I love this. Like, I love our coaching calls. Like, I love writing content. Like, I'm obsessed with it. And, you know, while I, I have gotten so much better about drawing boundaries around work, but I still look forward to Monday morning, you know.

I know, me too. Yeah, like, I'm like, all right, bye kids. Yeah, exactly.

Yes, goodbye household. Like, I get to go to work now. Yeah. And, and I love that you said that, like, you don't have to feel guilty about that. Like, you're not a bad mom. Like, you don't have to choose between being, being the good mom and, and having like your own career and having like your own, um, you know, business that you're pursuing.

Yeah, like, so many people do. So many people are like, okay, then I only— I'm only gonna work 3 hours a day, so, because that's what— that's what I should be doing. Like, people that I talk to, and I'm like, no, you should be doing what you want to do. And It's okay to want to work. It's, you know, and also like let yourself feel guilty, let it happen, feel it, sit with it for a bit, then get rid of it because it's not helping anybody.

Yep. What about— okay, so this is kind of like turning it around— what about whenever you're done with your work, whenever you don't really have anything to do and then your kids are at school or at daycare and you have this time? How do you deal with that?

Um, I feel very guilty when that happens.

What do you do? Do you work?

Do you, um, some crap? I'll like clean, or I'll go pick up my kids, my daughter early. I can't pick up my son until school is over. Um, or sometimes I'll pick up my daughter early. Uh, lots and lots of cleaning, like I said. Or then I'm like, no, but this can be time and I can work on my business. And just because it's not time Like, I schedule time that I'm working on my business every week, and just because it's not time that's scheduled, well, then hey, now I've got more time to work on my business, and that's never a bad thing. Also, sometimes I take midday baths, and they are wonderful.

They are wonderful. I love it. Yes, that's something that I too have had that I have sort of, um, had to like adjust to, I guess. I don't know, like, you know, I brought on a virtual assistant. I actually have two VAs, um, one that does like projects and stuff for me, and then, and then one that does like lead generation and things like that. So I, I have freed up more time for myself, but like my— I don't know if it's like my ego or like the, the little voice in my head is like, no, Lindsay, like you can't enjoy your days. And, and, you know, if the kids— if Daniel's not home and the kids aren't home, then like you should be working more. Like you can't just sit down. And it's— I think that that's like a big adjustment that I've also had to make. You know, it's like a mom, you know, working from home, quote unquote. Like, but then, then I have to like reframe it and I think, okay, well, what would I be doing if I had like a storefront, you know? What would I be doing then, you know? Um, would it be okay for me to have said free time if, if, you know, I had like a brick-and-mortar business, you know? Would it be the same, the same thing? So So yeah, I was just curious how, how you handle that as another mom, as a mom, you know, with having freedom.

Yeah, it's hard. Like, honestly, it's not— it's hard sometimes. It's like, well, I really want to just enjoy myself for half an hour, right?

Like, if—

like, I put on— while I was working the other day, I was doing something for, like, working on my own stuff, and I put on a Christmas movie. And I was like, because I don't do this— my husband doesn't want to watch these cheesy Christmas movies at night. And like, I don't blame him. And my kids aren't at the age yet where they want to watch, you know, and they were talking like those like cheesy Hallmark Christmas movies.

Yeah.

I was like, I'm gonna put this on while I work and this is gonna be like time that I'm working and time that I'm doing something for myself. Um, but like I do feel guilty that I'm like, especially about my daughter because my son, he gets to be, he's in school. Like there's no choice about going to school, but it's my daughter. I'm like, oh, should I really have this extra time? Like, is it really okay that I have an hour to myself today? And yes, yes, it is. Yes, it's fine. Yeah, it took me so long to believe that, right? Because of course it is. We all need time to ourselves.

Yep, absolutely. I'm glad that, that this conversation is circled there because there's a lot of moms that are dealing with that same thing, you know, whether they're coaches or whether they're virtual assistants or, or whatever they're doing, even if they, you know, just still go to a 9 to 5 or whatever, like, it's like What about me? You know, do I deserve that time? Do I get that time? Um, so I'm glad that we, that we, that we talked about that. Yeah, me too. Yeah, enough, I find. Absolutely. And the more that we can like normalize it being a hard thing, you know, it, it's just something like, it's just part of it, like the better it is, right? Um, yeah. So, okay, cool. So if you could, and then this is just a fun question, if you could go back and like do anything differently, what would you do differently? As far as building your business, as far as building your coaching business, what would you do differently?

I would have started my virtual assistant business earlier, for sure. Um, I would have like right off the bat invested in myself. I would have like found— I mean, by that, like a course, a program, like financially invest in myself, in my business, and timewise. Like, I didn't really give myself a lot of time to work on this when I first started. So like, I would find a mentor, a coach, because once I finally did, that's when my business was like, oh, okay, this is, this is really working now. And you know what, there's nothing I would change yet about my coaching business. I love it. And like, it's just so, so rewarding that There's nothing I want to change about it.

Yep. I like to use the same, like, saying yes to yourself. So it was like, whenever you say yes, the universe says yes to you, or God, or whatever, you know, it says yes to you, then you receive those blessings, right?

Yeah, for sure. And I think one other thing was I wish that I'd, like, discovered mindset work a lot earlier. Oh girl, I didn't even know what it really was. And when I figured— when I when I like discovered it, I was like, that's not true. Like, you don't need to work on your mindset. Like, I literally would laugh at people and like, oh my God, like, no, no, no, no, I work on my mindset every day. Like, do worksheets and, you know, every single day.

So wow, what does that mean? Because I have people on my Facebook that are like, what does mindset work? What does that mean? What did that mean to you? Whenever you needed it? How did it find you? What kind of shifts happened in your life?

So there was a— for example, this is when I first like really started to believe that mindset actually— like that your mind actually contributed to what you do. Um, my husband and I moved like a province over, and I worked at the job for 3 days and then I got laid off. And my husband had quit his job here to move with me for this, like, dream job of mine. And it was like the worst 6 months of our whole lives. We were broke, we couldn't find jobs, we were feeling sorry for ourselves. And like, when I say we were feeling sorry for ourselves, we were really feeling sorry for ourselves. We're like, well, I'm never gonna get a job. Well, he's never gonna get a job. Okay, well, this sucks. And like, we were so— both of us so negative, like, like I can hardly even think about that time because it's like brings up this negative energy. And I don't even really know how it flipped, but like 5 months into it, I was like, we cannot live like this anymore. Of course nothing's going our way. We don't believe in ourselves. We don't believe that we deserve anything. We don't believe that things will get better. And then We ended up like moving back and I found a job right away because I was like, all right, we're gonna go back to Montreal, I'm gonna find a job and you're gonna stay home and like take care of our son until you can find a job. And like, we're not gonna pay for daycare until we're both working. And yeah, it was that point in my life that I was like, okay, this is what I want. And then this is— I got it. This is the kind of job I want. I got it. This is like— it just changed. Like, you know, when you start to really What you believe is the truth. Yeah, like if you believe in yourself or you don't, you're that— you're right kind of thing. I don't remember what the exact saying is. If you believe you can or you believe you can't, you're right.

Yeah, and that's like, yeah, gotta believe in yourself. So mindset work for you didn't start out with some worksheet, it didn't start out with some coaching program, it didn't start out with some manifestation thing, right?

It definitely had like visualization, um, and like what I— what my like ideal situation, my ideal job, my ideal life overall was going to be. And it wasn't until like I realized that the power of like my mindset, then I started with like the worksheets and the vision boards and things like that and manifestation.

But all of it came from you just making that simple thought that like, this sucks and it's gonna keep sucking if we think it's gonna keep sucking.

Yeah, exactly, exactly.

Yeah. Wow, that's so good. Okay, so Emily, I know that there are a ton of women who want to start their virtual assistant businesses, that are curious, that want to have this lifestyle where they too can take time with their family, where they can go pick up their kids early, where they can have more time with their partners, for themselves, even have midday baths. And if they were curious of starting their own virtual assistant business and they wanted support and they wanted the structure to get started, what, um, where would you direct them to go? I know that you have opportunities to work with you. Um, where, how could someone, you know, like explore that process?

So you can find me on Instagram and send me a message anytime. I like love chatting with people in the DMs there. My Instagram is @va_coaching_with_emily. And also I have a Facebook group that is for virtual assistants. We've got a ton of people in there, like lots of virtual assistants who are supporting each other, answering questions for each other. And I do actually live weekly weekly trainings in there on different things to do with the skills and the finding the clients and like just all around everything about being a virtual assistant. And that group is called the Virtual Assistant Village. Okay, so make sure you can get yourself in there. Awesome. I also have a website and you can check out my different programs. I have group programs and one-on-one programs and actually I'm gonna be releasing like a new program pretty soon in January. So, excuse me, my website is va-coaching-with-emily.com.

I love it, it's also cohesive. VA Coaching with Emily. Yeah, awesome. So y'all go check out Emily on V— on Instagram, VA Coaching with Emily, right? Okay, you can check out her Facebook group, um, the Virtual Assistant Village. Yep, yep. Okay, or you can make her—

even in business.

Oh my gosh, oh my goodness, 100%. And then also check out the website VA Coaching with Emily, and Emily is amazing. Um, I have watched you grow just over the past few weeks. Like, I've watched this, um, this new energy about yourself and about your business and your direction and everything. So I'm super excited to see where it goes. Yes, yes, yes, you're welcome. And anyone that works with you is definitely blessed, and they're definitely in good hands.

I feel the exact same way about you. I'm so, so glad our paths crossed.

Yay! Awesome, awesome. Okay, y'all, so this has been another episode of the Aligned Coach Interview Series. So we will see you all next time.

Thank you, Emily.

Bye, thanks for having me.