Lois Letchford Reads: The Killer Cat's Christmas - Part 4

4 Mar 2021 · 4 min

Watch on YouTube

3:48

In this YouTube reading, Lois Letchford (Speaker A) narrates Chapter 4, “Surprise, Surprise,” from the children’s book The Killer Cat’s Christmas. The narrator finds herself sitting on a sofa while three cats—Lucilla, Lancelot, and Ellie—surround her, drooling and demanding her attention. She attempts to leave, but the cats block her exit, insisting she stay for their safety. After a brief struggle, she listens as the cats propose putting on a “show.” Ellie enthusiastically supports the idea, while the narrator internally doubts that cats can be trained to act, noting the absurdity of the situation. The passage mixes playful dialogue, the narrator’s nervous humor, and the cats’ mischievous plans, ending with a light‑hearted, slightly anxious tone. A brief interjection from Speaker B apologizes to Lois, adding a meta‑commentary layer.

Chapters

Hello, Lois Letchford reading from The Killer Cats Christmas, Chapter 4, Surprise, Surprise. So that's how I ended up sitting like goody-two-shoes on the sofa in the front room while Lucilla and Lancelot drooled and dribbled over my brains and beauty. Oh, Chuffy, you're so lovely! Your fur's so soft, and you're so clever. I wish we had a cat. Oh, Ellie, you're so lucky. It just went on and on. I stood for it about a minute or two, and then I reckoned it was time to leave. So I stood up. Quick as a flash, all 3 of them reached out to stop me. I was trapped. No, Tuffy, we promised. Just to keep you safe, you have to stay. I tried to wriggle free. Lucinda shut the door and Lancelot checked the window latch. Ellie could see that I was getting nervous. So never mind, she soothed. Let's think of something to play. Play? What does she think I am, some new-born fluffball? But it was best to know what was going on, so I stopped struggling long enough to listen. What was it going to be? Hide and seek? I hoped not. Most of my hiding places in this house are mine, Mine, mine. How about Murder in the Dark? Step on me by mistake and I will scratch a good chunk out of you. Perhaps they'd choose Tiddlywinks. Better take care. Flick just one wink at me And you are dead! Surprise, surprise! Let's put on a show! Lucilla said. Yes! Lancelot echoed. Let's put on a little show! Ellie was bouncing up and down, clapping her hands. Oh, goody gumdrops! I love doing special little shows! I was embarrassed. Ellie, such a drip! But I think I might at least be I mean, you can't train cats to act or dance. No one would even try. You might be able to boss dogs about, but never cats. So I thought I'd be safe with special little shows.
Well, more fool me. I'm sorry, Lois.