Lois Letchford reads Chapter 6 of Anne Fiennes' The Killer Cat Runs Away, where a sarcastic cat watches Ellie browse kitten photos and judges their names, clumsiness, and lack of self-care. The cat's voice is sharp and disdainful, full of witty commentary on why it can't speak and what it thinks of actual kittens.
Chapters
Hello, I'm Lois Letchford, author of the book Reversed: A Memoir and literacy problem solver. Reading from Anne Fiennes' The Killer Cat Runs Away, chapter 6, So Spank My Bum. So spank my furry little bum, I didn't say goodbye to Ellie. I meant to. That's why I went back up the stairs and into her bedroom. That's why I jumped up on her side and started to purr in her ear. Then I saw what she was looking at on her computer screen. Kittens! Cute, Baby fluffballs. Sweet little winsome things with huge eyes staring at— you wouldn't believe their names. Sugar Pie, Binty Minty, Pantsy Wantsy, Prissy Missy. Excuse me while I stick a paw down my throat. Ellie stopped at the photo of a kitten called Titania. I ask you to Tanya for a cat? Look, Tuffy, isn't she so cute? Sometimes I think it's a good thing that I can't speak, because if I could, I would have told young Ellie just what I think of idiotic, brainless balls of fluff that can't clean their fur or creep out of anything, taking a quick nap in a nest. Why, some of them can't even find the way to the litter tray on the 10th day. So it's a good job I don't talk. I wouldn't have liked the last few words that I exchanged with Ellie to be so unpleasant. So I never said goodbye.
