How to discern signal from the noise | Interview with Jeremy Davis | Ep. 13

If it aligns me with God and like the values of who I am and who— what I'm trying to accomplish, then I apply it and I fix it and I move forward. If it has nothing to do with like my goals and my aspirations and who I am, I disregard it.

Welcome to the Rising Tribe. I'm Jared.

I'm Austin Maser.

And our goal is to inspire young men to build strong families and discover their potential as men, husbands, and fathers.

And we'll do this by having authentic conversations about faith, family, health, and business as we strive to level up our lives and the lives around us. Welcome to the Rising Tribe, everybody. We're super excited to have you guys here. Today we have our first guest speaker of our podcast. Uh, his name is Jeremy Davis. He is— if you, you've heard me talk before, you've probably heard me mention Jeremy. Uh, but I really feel special to be on this call today because Jeremy has had like such a huge impact on my life. And so has Jared. And so both of these guys are guys that I've really gravitated towards, especially after my mission. And they both helped me out so much. So how I got to know Jeremy, I had just engaged, I had just gotten engaged to my wife and I was talking to a guy from the door-to-door space named Ed. Nathan. And I was going to try to sell with Nathan up in Chicago, didn't work out. And something very rare that you see in door-to-door is when somebody says, okay, I know that I can't help you, but I'm going to send you this way. That actually doesn't happen a lot. A lot of guys are like, oh, you can't work with me, I'm not going to work with you at all. And so this is, this is really cool how Nathan sent me to Jeremy because Jeremy was going to sell out in Atlanta. He was doing alarms at the time. Well, COVID happened and we didn't end up working together, but it's so cool. Jeremy and I, Jeremy and I remained friends and we've both been through a lot of similar things in life and we've been able to lean on each other. And I am honored to have him on our show today. Uh, biggest role model for me as far as being a husband, a father, and being successful in sales. And one of the reasons I've been so successful in sales is because I just take this guy's advice and I implement it. So take notes today, uh, make sure you've got pen and paper because I promise you that whatever you learn from this, uh, you'll be able to apply. So Jeremy, thank you. Welcome.

Yeah, that's quite the intro, Austin. I, I was, I was just thinking as you were talking about that, I was like, man, this guy's going to get me emotional and start crying before we even get started. So no, I appreciate the intro. Thanks for having me. And I didn't know I was your first guest, so it's an honor.

Yeah, you're our first guest of the year. Last year we did 12 episodes. We wanted to start small. We say, okay, let's do one a month. And then this year we're going to continue with that to keep the consistency. But our goal is to get one guest speaker on a month. So 2 episodes a month. But really, I think it's cool to have you on. You— and I didn't even go into some of your achievements, like as far as, you know, your sales stuff and being very successful at Vivint and then at Fluent and being Rookie of the Year at your real estate agency, like, and now it sounds like you're coaching and, you know, you're doing an incredible job on it. But I think where I wanted to kind of go with our first question is, what does success mean to you? And then how has your priority shifted over the years? Just because I know that's kind of a broad question, but I've seen, I've heard stories from when you started selling and then, you know, to where you ended up strengthening your marriage and putting fatherhood in the first, you know, like being, being a father first. And I've seen it kind of happen, like the back end of this, this shift happened. I was curious if you could talk on that a little bit.

Yeah, so I guess I'll give like a general life synopsis real quick, just to give some background. So I was actually a religious professor. I was hired on by the LDS Church, um, without being married. I was— I think I was one of the first people that they rolled the dice on, and what usually you have to be married to teach seminary for the church and get paid, and they waived that rule. Um, I just did really well in the classroom. It spoke to me. I loved it. I taught in Springville and up in Lyndon at the same time. I was full-time at the MTC. I was hiring all the Spanish teachers, training them. Um, and, and then I just had a friend that was like, hey, I did door-to-door this last summer. I like tripled your income. You should probably come and try this out. And, uh, and he knew the exact word to like just poke at me, get me, and it was competition. He knew my past from before the mission was competition. So he's like, hey, there's a lot of competitions. I didn't even know how much I was gonna make or what I was gonna get paid per deal. So I went out, didn't sell for my first month, almost threw in the towel. Um, just like on my mission, I struggled the first little bit on my mission. I almost threw in the towel, ended up staying, um, because of my dad and his advice. Same thing in, in Vivint my rookie year. I stayed, then I was the top rookie in the company, um, did really, really well. Spent 12 years in door-to-door traveling all over the nation, loved every second of it. Um, so I left my religious career, I came over to, uh, door-to-door, and then I transitioned into real estate. My first year in real estate, most realtors do one deal, I sold 75. And then, uh, this last year, just coaching kind of fell on our lap, my lap and my business partner. We took it and we just ran with it and it's exploding. Well, I mean, I've got a couple coaching clients in Singapore, so that's so cool. Just the funnest experience. So that's kind of like everything that's happened in the last like 15 years. When I look at success, Austin, like you mentioned, it's definitely changed and evolved over time as I've evolved, right? I think our perception on certain principles only change and grow as we grow. Right? Like we can only like really achieve like the cap of our understanding. So by reading, having mentors, coaches, the people we surround ourselves with, that's how you start to expand your mindset on this principle. So originally it was numbers, numbers, numbers. I'm gonna beat you. I'm gonna outwork you. I'm gonna get all the trophies and I've got 'em all. I've got all the trophies that you probably collect. And except the Golden Door.

Dang it.

They came out with that right after I left. And, and so then last year or the year before, it's time has passed by pretty quick, but my dad was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer. And, and that whole year I dealt with depression for the first time. And it was a whirlwind. Like every other day I'd have moments where I'd be sitting in my basement and I'd phase out for 4 hours. And my wife would come down and be like, hey, like, are you okay? And, and I just could— like, it was such a new experience for me to not be able to grasp reality. And, uh, and then while that was happening, like, my, my identity started to shift, right? Like, I was losing my dad, and then I lost my dad, and then I was somebody that didn't have a dad, like an earthly dad. And I— and all my, like, um, aspirations and goals and how I identified myself in business and as a father, like, started to really hardcore shift. And then I came out the other side really, really wanting to teach again. Like, that inner teacher from before when I was teaching at the church and teaching at the MTC for all those years, that just came alive. And I just wanted to impact and give back, and I didn't care about the accolades or the awards or the numbers anymore. And it was literally like this night and day pivot and shift. Um, so I would say the definition of success just over time, like, really just depends on where you're at in life. I see it now as my definition of success is how I, um, how I interact with my kids. Can I get them back to Heavenly Father, and what am I doing to do that? Is my spouse happy, and does she feel taken care of? And then in a professional sense, do people know that I will go to bat with them? Do they know that I will fall on a sword for them? If they do and they can see that through my actions, then I'm succeeding.

I love that. I think that's a cool, like really cool how you can like look back on parts in your life and see how priorities have changed. And I think it's really cool to have been able to talk to you over the last couple of years. Because I've had somewhat of a similar shift, right? From wanting to win everything. And it was actually really a weird shift because I wanted to hold on to like the, I'm going to win, I'm going to just throw down big numbers and with zero regard to everybody else to an extent. And at the time I was still, at the time I was a part of Anthem's corporate training. I'm their corporate sales trainer. You know, Jeremy's helped me out a lot in this role to help me, help me do well in this. But I have— I started finding way more joy in helping the reps I was working with because— and, and Jeremy, you mentioned this to me, but the, the fail rate in real estate is absurd, right?

Like 90, 90%. And you're first—

sorry, when you say fail rate, are you referring to new real estate agents, um, like getting their license and then dropping out?

Yep.

New real estate agents in the first 2 years, 90% don't make it.

Wow. Which is insane.

It's insane.

Wow. It's— what's crazy is, you know, the— I think when you do door-to-door and entrepreneurship and sales, you know the amazing impact it can have on your life and your free time and your lifestyle. And you can impact so many more people because you have like more resources. And it's such a good skill to know. But to know that so many people don't succeed and drop out in the first 2 years. I know that's one of the reasons that you wanted to get back into coaching as well, because— and you're an awesome coach. If you— so follow him right now, just so we can get this plug in right now. Follow him at— it's spelled Door to Door Real Estate, um, and check out his stuff. But he's a very, very solid coach that just helps his clients reverse engineer their goals and actually hit them, which is— which is, I think you're the master of systems, right? And talk to us a little bit about— you made like a— you made like a vision. We wanted to talk about this because we started talking before we recorded, but you made a vision like PDF to help people learn like and build their vision for their life for 2024. And then you also have yourself— you also have a binder yourself to talk to on the PDF. And then we want— we want to kind of know like What does Jeremy want to do this year? What's in Jeremy's binder this year? Yeah.

Yeah. So I guess it goes all the way back to the MTC and seminary. Well, I'll probably go back further. It probably goes back to my trainer in the mission. Uh, awesome guy. He was towards the end of his mission and, uh, we just, he just really struggled at getting up on time. And, uh, and so for the first like 6 months I was in my mission, I was with them and I had to learn how to teach myself. I had to learn how to do missionary work essentially on my own. And so then when I got home and I got into the MTC and then even seminary, I learned really quick, okay, here's the church's curriculum and they're helping missionaries get started. And my brain just started looking at where are the holes? How can I make this more efficient? And so I started implementing a lot of things that I was learning outside the MTC to help guys get going quicker. And then I got hired on from the MTC to work on some of their curriculum for, for missionaries. You two probably are aware of it, but the how to, um, the teaching principles, like how to begin teaching and all those, I was on that board that put that together. And so then when I got into door-to-door sales, I learned that there's a ton of guys that come in, there's a couple that filter out, but the training was incredible. You just literally had to show up plug in and you would do well. When I got into real estate, there was none. There was no, like, it's crazy, but there was no training. My broker at the time and everyone at that brokerage was like, hey, you'll get lucky if you get one deal your first year. And I was like, one deal? All right, I'm talking to my wife. I should have not left. This was a dumb decision. And so there was just no training. And so I'm constantly thinking like, what training do new guys need? What training do new guys need? And so then I got into the coaching position in real estate. And so the entire time it's been, okay, let me just load them with value. Let me just hit them with value. What do they need? Okay, they need a vision board course. Let me learn how to build one. They need, um, like listing packets that they take to people that are going to sell their house. Let me build one so they can use it and edit it. Um, they need roleplay groups. Let me implement that. What technology do we need? And so that way I could lay out the entire foundation so anyone that came in could just plug in just like in door-to-door sales and do really well. So recently with the new year, a lot of our guys didn't know and girls didn't know like really what their goal was for next year. So I was thinking, okay, I need to like map out like how to put goals together. And I analyze how have I done this, how have my mentors done this, and let me put it in like a very simple document that they could follow. Um, it was 10 pages, then 20 pages, then 40 pages. I think I sent it to you at 45, and then I kept going, and then it ended up being 80 pages. So it just, uh, just kept building it and building it, and it was, man, I was just alive, and I was, I was just on fire because it was so exciting for me. There's a book by a psychologist, probably one of my favorite books. It's called Switch: How to Help People Change When Change Is Hard. Um, two Harvard psychologists, they talk about the brain and how change happens. They relate it to like an elephant with a rider on top and shaping the path in Vietnam. And so I built the entire course off of that. It's free, by the way, if anyone wants to reach out to Austin or Jared for it, it's completely free. But so I built that entire course and then now every single person that's in our coaching program has a binder or has a vision board and a business plan and a schedule that's aligned with what they're passionate about. And so for me, that was really cool to build and then help people understand, like, you need to have a vision in your life, right? You need to have like a reason to wake up. Then you need to have goals. You need to have, um, something that you're working towards. And then every day you need a lever that you're pulling. Like, you need some type of purpose. And, uh, without that, you're just aimlessly walking throughout this life without purpose. You don't accomplish much, man.

That's— I think that's really powerful. And, uh, I guess a question that I have, because Austin and I, we talk about our goals and our dreams, and we We encourage other people to dream big and to dream bigger, right? But do you have currently in your life, or have you had in the past, people that, that maybe try to knock you down for having bigger dreams, for having these, you know, audacious goals? And, you know, kind of like the lobsters in the pot trying to pull you back down, or the monkeys climbing the ladder trying to pull you down.

Like, do you—

so do you have these people in your life, or have you had them in your life? And how have you How do you manage those relationships?

Yeah, so you probably would have never guessed I would say this, but it was actually my parents. Um, when I first got into door-to-door and I was leaving two like really good careers, um, in religious profession, they were like, you're gonna go door-to-door? Like you have two jobs that are set up, um, that you love, that you do really well. Granted, I wasn't making that much money. And they just couldn't believe that I was going to travel, pick up my family, my daughter at the time, and go door to door. And so to me at the time, they were my biggest critics. So I had to find other people to support me. Over the years, that's become my wife. At the beginning, it was really hard for her because, you know, she grew up in Montana and it was really hard for her to like accept that this was the path that we were going to take. And, uh, and she's now become my biggest cheerleader. I had to go search and find mentors. Um, Casey Baud, Jeff Mendez, John Taylor, um, all these guys played crucial roles in supporting me and believing in me. Um, and then as time progressed, I added more people that were in my corner, and I actively had to go find them and put them in my life so I had a, a section in the stands that was cheering for me. So I think that's true with a lot of people. I've got a couple of coaching clients where they just don't have anybody in their life that cheers for them. And I frequently remind them, I will be that person for you if you need someone to high-five you. Like, I will literally call you every night at 9:00. I will tell my Siri to remind myself to call you and I will cheer you on, whatever you need. But everybody needs that type of cheerleader. You need a mentor, you need a coach in your life. And a lot of us don't have that naturally. You got to go find it.

I think that's really powerful because just, I mean, just with respect to this podcast, um, when I remember telling a friend of mine that Austin and I were starting this podcast, this we were going to talk about, etc., they're like, does the world need another, another one of these podcasts where you talk about motivation or inspiration, trying to inspire young men or whatever? And I was like, okay, first of all, rude. Second of all, like, you know, reminder to me not to share any more of my goals and dreams with you. But also Yeah, it was later on I was listening to a podcast that I don't even remember which one, but he said on it that, that everyone, whatever it is you want to do, get up and do it, start it, because you might be the only voice in one of your listeners' life who's there saying you can do hard things, you can achieve your dreams, you can achieve your goals. And I think one of the reasons— because I mean, Austin— something Austin and I shared and something I didn't know about you is that we don't have dads in our lives. So my dad, when I was in high school, my parents separated because of a long history of drug addiction that we didn't know existed in my dad's life. And, you know, family kind of separated. And now I don't hear from my dad and he's, you know, hopefully he's doing well, but I don't know where he is. And it's been like that for several years. And so we don't have a father figure in our lives or a father in our lives right now telling us you can do hard things, get up, get after it, like you can be all that you can be. And then there's also no example there too, not just the instruction, but the lack of an example there. So, uh, we've had to seek out other people, um, to encourage us and to, and to, to point us in the right direction, to give us the training and whatnot.

Yeah, there's a, there's a quote that I have in my scriptures. I can't remember who said this, I'll have to look it up, but it says that that God took the same amount of time in, in perfectly placing the star where Christ was born. He took the same amount of time in where two people would cross in their lives so that they could edify, uplift, and encourage each other to return home to his presence. And to me, that's always like really sat, sat with me. That's really impacted how I see relationships, because if you and I are for some reason time of season, right? If for some reason we're crossing paths, then there's a reason behind that, and there's a lot of planning that went into that. Um, so I think like, be nice to people, reach out to them, cheer them on. Like you said, a lot of people aren't going to support your dreams right out of the gate. And then what's crazy, and I've learned this over the past couple months and I've shared this with Austin, but everyone wants to cheer you on while you're going through the hard stuff, but then once you start to compete with them and you start to produce at their level, oh man, like the criticism comes out. They shut you off, they turn you down, they, you know, stop being friends with you. They start talking behind your back and it's just so crazy. It's like, why does that have to happen? Why can't we just support and cheer on everybody else? Because if you win, Jared, I win. If Austin wins, I win. If I win, you guys win.

Right?

We edify and uplift each other. A high tide is going to raise all ships. So why can't we all have that personality or that thought pattern? But what's crazy is not everyone's going to think like that. So go find people and actively put them in your lives. Like Austin, I know you have the goal of meeting Ed Mylett and you're actively hunting him down to go put him in your life. And that's the perfect example, right, of getting cheerleaders, putting people— I heard it. Someone said once, putting people in the stands to cheer you on for life.

Yeah, I think the Ed Mylett thing, I'm going to go meet him at this thing called Life Surge on March 9th. And not only do I get to be like front row seats to this event, we get to go meet him after, take a picture with him afterwards. And I'm like, for— it was like $250. But to get to go meet Ed Mylett, that is amazing.

Wow.

So we'll get to meet the guy that plays Jesus on The Chosen as well. And that's going to be our date.

Yo, dude, that is awesome.

I'm so excited, man. Yeah, I'm going to hand— so one of the things I'm going to do with that is just hand him a letter and just explain how big of an impact he's had in my life. Because the first time— actually, the first time I ever met Jeremy was I was going to work, do alarms with Jeremy. And so Jeremy was like, hey, you got to go to this door-to-door conference. And he took me to this conference. I had no idea who Ed Mylett was, but all I know is that Jeremy was stoked. He was like, we gotta see him. Yeah, I was like, cool, let's go watch him. He had probably the best speech I've ever heard to this day, and it was all about—

I—

yeah, identity and how you have— you will perform to the level you believe you ought to perform at. I shared a story about his son golfing and how that he took his son out to golf. There was another dad and son there that made a snarky remark to Ed Mylett's son about how his son wasn't any good. And Ed Mylett just turned to his son, dropped a couple of bombs, said, we're not going to let him beat this guy. We're not going to let this guy beat us. And then his son just destroyed the other— the competition. But it was such a cool story. And that was my introduction into the personal development world. And my life. And more than anything, Jeremy took me to Door to Door Con, picked me up at In-N-Out Burger over in, uh, over in Lehigh and drove me to, drove me to Door to Door Con. It was— and that's, that's where our friendship really kind of, uh, we got to meet in person. Him and I, Jeremy, we've only seen each other in person 3 times now. Door to Door Con, Door to Door Con, and then we met at a park. We're really good about, we're really good about hang— like staying in touch. And I think that goes to show, like, with friendships, you don't always necessarily need to see them in person all the time. Yeah. One of the cool things about Jeremy and I's relationship, and the same thing with you, Jared, is that there's no money here. Like, eventually, maybe our podcast will monetize this somehow, but it all started with no money ties, right? And that's one of the things with Jeremy is that he didn't make a single penny off of me. After he parted ways to go and do a different alarm company and I went down to Atlanta, but he still wanted to pour value into my life. And I feel like we're at this point in our relationship now where we give each— I feel like we give it to each other equally. Like, I lean on Jeremy a lot and there's times when Jeremy leans on me and it's good to just talk. And man, I'm so grateful, man. And one of the things that I wanted to touch on too, is talk to us about your role as a father. Like, what— why does that bring you so much joy? What are your kids' names? And, you know, what has it been like evolving into a dad and seeing your kids grow up? Just, I wanted to talk on that a little bit.

Yeah, you know, it's— as you bring that up, my nose starts to like get that cold feeling and I'm like, oh crap, here it comes. But, uh, But man, I just love being a dad. It's my greatest calling in life. There's nothing more that, that brings me joy than being a dad and seeing those guys light up. And that comes from my dad. My dad loved being a dad. Yeah, he made less money. He didn't buy the biggest house. He took really good care of his money and he was really financially sound. But it was the experiences, the coaching my teams, taking me after school to just go chat. Like, he, he just loved being a good influence, and that's because his dad was not. And so he decided to change the trajectory of his lineage, and that was a decision he made. And that's now impacting my, my brother's life and how he's a dad. It's impacting my life and how I'm a dad. So I've got 3 currently. Um, one is 8. Her name is Caitlin. She's the most spiritually sound, intelligent little whippersnapper you'll ever meet. Her and I have PPIs— we have personal priesthood meetings every Sunday— and we'll have like these deep discussions about life and what she's learning in the scriptures and just her friendships. I just sit there and I take a ton of notes. Um, And then I've got Beckham. Beckham's 6, and they all have birthdays right next to each other because when we were doing door-to-door, we had to have our kids in the fall. Beckham is my sports wingman. That guy just loves sports. He knows everybody on the Warriors team. He's a massive basketball fan. I tell him that he can always sneak down and watch sports with me in the basement. Love that kid. And then I've got Grayson. Grayson is like a Tasmanian devil. That guy is crazy.

How old is he?

I love that guy. He's 4. He just turned 4. So I love that guy. He's crazy. He's the reason we don't have, or waited a while to have a 4th. Uh, broke toilets, broke phones, drew on the walls, but man, he just is the life of, life of the party. Like that guy is hilarious. Um, but yeah, so no, I mean, I, I just really got that from my dad. Um, like my, if I can accomplish anything in life, it would be to get those guys back to God. That's how I view parenthood. I read one parent book a month. I've done that for the past 4 months. I really try to educate myself on being a good father, on different practices. I make sure that they know that I'm available, that we can talk, that we have a friendship, but I'm also like very stern with them. So it's been a really cool experience to be a dad. And that's kind of my transition. When my father passed, I realized like, yes, the production is important, And yes, I need to provide for my family financially, but if at the end of the day, if my kids don't walk into my room and they're not excited to see me and they don't want to hug me for 6 seconds, I'm failing at the most important thing in life, which is fatherhood.

Man, I was, I was just reading, uh, in the scriptures, there's a story about, uh, Nephi when he has a vision, and the first thing he does is he goes into his father's tent to tell him. And this, this year I'm reading, I'm reading through the Book of Mormon, highlighting things about like qualities and perspectives and examples of good fathers, strong fathers, strong men. And I, I highlighted that and I was like, wow, I've never thought about Lehi in that way. I'm not— I never thought about his father in that way. What kind of a father are you that when your child has an incredibly spiritual experience, they come straight to you? They want to talk to you about it. And so I love that. I absolutely love that. So you've been— okay, and then another thing. So poverty, poverty breaks most people, but some of the, you know, some of the greatest performers in the world come from poverty. And the question is, well, like, is it, is it the poverty that makes you? Because if it breaks a bunch of people, then, and is also the impetus for a bunch of other people to achieve highly, is it the poverty itself? And I think the answer to that is no. It's, it's the person and the decisions that they make and whether or not they're gonna, they're gonna choose to escape it. So your, your father broke the chain. He ended that legacy of being, of being, uh, you know, an absent or neglectful father. So Austin and I have talked about this and how, you know, like, like my dad's absent now because of drugs and a lot of other you know, poor decisions that he's made with his life. And it's had, you know, ruinous effects on, you know, especially on my mom, but on, you know, on our family. But one thing that I'm grateful for is that he ended the cycle of physical abuse, which is powerful, right? Because most people who abuse become— or who are abused become abusers. And so how is it that— how is it that this guy, that my dad, was able to end that? I don't know. But I'm grateful to him because he set the stage. You know, maybe he didn't finish the race the way he was supposed to, but he did set the stage for me, for my brothers, for my sisters to be able to go off and become all that we can become. And I think I owe it to— I owe it both to my dad and I think I owe it to God for having given me a dad like that, that I now, you know, I jump off the diving board and I go. And I, and I become all that I can be and I can become the father that, you know, the father that I can become. So how, how I guess you, I mean, you've been a dad for over 8 years now. So how have you evolved from, you know, I guess like when you first find out that, that your wife's pregnant to today, now you're, you're reading parenting books and you're, you're, you have PPIs with your, you know, with your kids every Sunday. Like how do you go from, from there to there?

Yeah. So I, I wanted to touch on something you brought up and then I'll answer that, that question. That's okay. In regards to breaking chains, so my, my dad broke that chain, but then the chain that I've been responsible to break is communication and, and communicating feelings and empathizing with my kids. I didn't have that growing up. My parents were argumentative. They would explode often. I never learned how to conflict, like go through conflict resolution until I got married. That's why our first couple of years were really rough. Because I literally, like, when I was growing up, if I yelled at you, I had advanced classes at high school, I was taking college courses in high school, I had sports, and I had work. So I could literally yell at you, say the most hurtful things, and not have to talk to you for 2 weeks. And that's just how I developed. So with my kids, it's really been an emphasis with my wife and I to break that. And to apologize and take ownership and communicate our feelings. So that's been like, if there was ever a theme besides God and church, that's the main theme in our family because we're very purposeful on breaking that chain on both sides of our families. How do I go from being a new dad to this? I think it's just the desire to evolve. I think as, as humans, our divine nature is to grow and evolve and change. That's how God operates. That's how Christ operates. That's how his gospel operates, right? Like, through repentance, we can change for the better. It's not necessarily getting rid of bad habits, the natural man, but it's also developing godlike attributes. I think a lot of times we focus on the negative part, on releasing this, but it's also moving forward and advancing to divinity, towards, you know, a celestial lifestyle. And so it's just been the desire to grow. I've also been super blessed to be around really good fathers, but I've also seen some pretty bad ones. When I was in door-to-door, there were a ton of people getting divorced. For some reason at the time, that was happening left and right. And so it was like pretty apparent our first like 2, 3 years in door-to-door, I looked at my wife and I was like, that's not good. Going to happen. Okay, how does that not happen? Well, we need to have weekly date nights. Well, we need to go to the temple once a week in the summer. We need to take callings while we're working in the summer, which if you've done door-to-door, I don't think anyone does that, uh, when you pick up and go to a different market. Um, then when we come home, we're going to actively go to church. We're not going to take off on Sunday. We're not going to party. We're going to keep the Sabbath day holy, um, while we're working in the summer. And it was just very, very proactive and aggressive. And then I had, I came across a really good dad. It might have been Casey Baw. Dude, I quote that guy like he's Buddha. I love Casey Baw. If you don't know him, go follow him. That guy literally is a one-liner machine with the amount of information that he knows. But I think it really was him. I just, I saw him grow and develop in door-to-door, but he was also like a rock solid dad. And I was like, okay, this guy's figured it out. And I remember asking him like very clearly, this is probably like back in 2015, like why is it that he's excelling? And it was just purely education. He shared with me that the biggest competitive advantage we have in any role in our life is just purely education. If you want to be a better dad or a better salesman or a better friend, it's just access to books, right? Like, go buy these books. People have spent their entire lives putting into 100 pages all the little nuggets that they learned, so you don't have to spend that amount of time. And so I just sat really quick, and then my brother and I actually started a podcast back in— oh man, 10 years ago.. And one of the topics we would always talk about is fatherhood. And so with hearing that from Casey Baw, starting that podcast at the time really merged this desire to learn. And I figured, okay, what are my main roles? Um, it's leadership, it's sales, it's parenthood, and it's being a son of God. So those are my 4 themes I've kept for probably the past 8 years. Every week, every month I rotate through themes. And that's why you like, if, If you ever were in my office, you'd go look at my books and they're all themed on those 4 topics. So it's just growth. It's wanting to evolve. It's also like listening to people around you and then actually applying what they tell you has worked for them.

I like that a lot. I think one of the things, one of our questions we were gonna ask you today was like, hey, how do you discern between what's good advice and what's bad advice in a world where everybody's just throwing information at you? And I wanna get to that question really quick. But before I go in there, before I go there, and I want to hear your response on how do you discern between good and bad information in this very saturated personal development, do my way, invest in crypto.

Oh, yeah.

There's so many different pieces of advice out there. But my thing, I wanted to bring this up because you shared it with me on the phone the other day. You talk a lot about helping your kids express their emotions. And you can share this story if you want to, but you had, I think it was Beckham. He had a moment where he had to make a decision and he just stood there and he took a deep breath. Was it Beckham that did that?

It sounds just like Beckham.

So yeah, from what I remember, your son had to make a decision and this is what he said. He said, hey, one second, let me go collect my thoughts. And he stood by himself. He took a deep breath and there was a dad next to you. Yeah, there was a dad next to you and he's like, what just happened? You're like, well, we teach our kids how to communicate.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it was literally the other day, him and I were talking about some decision he had to make. Oh, it was about goals and we were just in a public setting and he didn't know what he was going to do for the year. So he said, he actually said, didn't say collect my thoughts. He said, I want to go pray. So he just went like 5 feet over, knelt down and like kneeled down and started praying. And I'm just looking at him. I'm like, I don't know, to laugh or just be happy that that's how he thinks and goes through. It was the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life. And then even the other day, we were having another PPI for January, and I was talking about his goals, and he's like, oh, well, let me go ask God. And literally just goes around the corner, kneels right there. It comes back, he's like, okay, I know what I want to do. I was like, well, that's pretty cool. That's pretty cool.

That is really cool. It's good that, like, I think it's so cool that as a father, your, your biggest goal is to get them back to Heavenly Father and to teach them to live in a way that will get them back to live with him, right? I, I, I think that Heavenly Father doesn't necessarily care what we do in our lives. Uh, and I think I talked to him this other day, but I think he cares, I think he cares how we do it. And, and, you know, the amount of effort we put in. And, um, you're a great example of teaching your kids how to connect with God. I see a lot of things on your, on your Instagram story of you taking your kids to the temple. And that, if you have kids— Jared and I both have kids— you know that getting the family— him and I just have one, and you've got three, so, uh, it's hard to get a bunch of kids packed into a car and take them to the temple. It's not easy, but you've made that a priority, and that's, and that's important to note, and it's made a difference in your family's life. I can see from the outside looking in.

Yeah, I think it just takes— I think it takes humility, right? Like, I, I'm not, I'm not this all-powerful, like, human being that is going to have the most impact on, on my kids' lives. My job is to direct them to God. So when my dad died, um, they You know, they were processing it and asking a bunch of questions. And, uh, and I just had this clear impression that anytime one of the kids missed my dad, to educate them that they can go sit on the temple grounds. And there's doctrine behind that. If you're on the temple grounds, it's the, the, besides being in the temple, it's the, the thinnest the veil will ever be anywhere, um, uh, on this, on this earth. So I told them, hey, like, if you ever miss Dad or my dad, their grandpa, let me know and I'll literally drive you to the temple and we'll just sit there, talk about Grandpa. And sometimes it would happen at like 11:30, like, no joke. They'd wake up, come to my room. I miss Grandpa. It's like, okay, I told them.

I made a promise.

I told them I'd do this. I made a promise. So I'd get them in the car and we drive over there for 5 minutes. I mean, you're right. It's a commitment. It's like a 45-minute commitment. But then they just started to like really just love and understand like the temple is where we can feel the Spirit. The temple is where I can be close to, because Natalie, my wife's mom, passed away before my dad, right? So we're both without a parent at about the same time. And then we walked through the temple when they just opened it and the questions they were asking, like it was just incredible because they realized and they understood the role of the temple.

I love that. I, uh, thanks for sharing that.

I was just reading in the Book of Mormon, and for those who are unfamiliar with the Book of Mormon, well, it's a book of scripture from, um, from the ancient Americas. And there's a, there's a dad in there that I mentioned earlier. His name's Lehi, and then he has a bunch of sons. One of his sons is Nephi, who is, um, who is faithful and follows in his footsteps, the footsteps of his dad. But then Nephi's got a couple brothers, Laman and Lemuel, who are are not as obedient and are constantly rebelling and murmuring and, um, kind of going against their dad. And the family ends up dividing later on. But there's a, there's a moment in there where the families had to move to the wilderness, and, uh, Laman and Lemuel are complaining, just complaining like, why'd you take us out here? We're gonna die. This is the worst, etc. And Nephi prays and receives, you know, a revelation from God, a confirmation that what his father has done is inspired by God, that they are doing what God wants them to do. And then he's at peace with it. But Laman and Lemuel, they don't. And what Lehi says to them is, you two don't know the dealings of God. And I think that's powerful that, you know, these two, the reason they, they disconnected and are angry and hateful and rebellious is because they don't know how God works. And I've never thought about it in that way. But as a father, like, I think you're spot on. Your job is to direct your children to God and to teach them how God operates, to teach them how he works with this fallen and broken world that we live in and how he uses us to help everyone else, and that it's up to us to also bear that burden of helping others to change their lives, to improve their lives, and to turn towards God. So I just, I don't know, I haven't made that connection until just, you know, just now.

Yeah, and Austin, I want to answer your question about discerning with all that self-help stuff, but Jared, I wanted to comment on that because that's so true. Um, so our— my daughter was just baptized and she had to fast for the first time. So my wife and I opened up the scriptures, we taught her the doctrine, and in our family we've always been clear with our kids. Um, let's look at what the scriptures say. Let's go back to the scriptures. What does God say about this? Not your parent, not like we're making up rules, but let's go see what God says. And then you pray about it and you decide. And it's a, it's a risky roll of the dice as a parent. Um, but we had her read it. She prayed about it. Um, she fasted, she made it till about 2 PM and then she just was struggling too much and she decided to give up. Um, not give up, but like end the fast and, and call it good. And, uh, she just felt so good after. And it was cool to, to explain to her, hey, This is what God teaches. These are the blessings. If you don't do this, this is what you forfeit and this is what you lose. Now I need to trust you and trust God that you can now have that decision. Same thing with the Sabbath day, right? My two sons, man, they love Mario. We're in the Mario phase. We're in the thick of Mario, which is awesome because I'm reliving my childhood dreams. But, you know, we don't play video games on Sunday. And, uh, and they're always like, man, I want to play video games, or is today a TV day? And, uh, and I always have to tell them like, look, today is the Sabbath. Obviously we've been taught to, you know, pull away from things that we can do during the week that take away our focus. But if you guys want to play, you're more than happy to. These are just the blessings that you're going to lose out on. So they can choose, and it's crazy, but we've made it 8 years and they've never done it. So it's just really cool to step back and then like let them develop that relationship, right? Like, my role— and I probably learned this in the MTC— about, like, my role is to step back, teach them the doctrine, and then let them develop that, that relationship on the side.

I love that. That's— and, uh, I think you're, you're letting your kids choose, which is so important. I haven't necessarily gotten to the age with Georgia yet where she's making big decisions, but I'll give her— I, I pretty much just do option closes on her. I'm like, hey, you can go night-night or you can brush your teeth. So she always chooses the option I want her to.

Um, yeah, my, my wife hates that I was in door-to-door because, uh, my kids are so good at negotiating. They're, they're really good, and they, they option close her like crazy. So yeah, you'll get to that point.

It'll be fun. Georgia will be a sneaky kid, you know, like, just very— I think she'll be clever. She already is. She already knows how to get me to fold. But anyways, I wanted to ask you, what is the best way you have been able— and what's the best way in your development you've been able to discern if somebody's giving good advice or if somebody's like, hey, I don't want to take that advice? How do you discern if you actually want to implement it or not?

Yeah, great, great question. So I'd probably say there's two things that I've learned to get to the point where I'm at. One is a, I think it's in the Joseph Smith journals. Somebody asked him, I can't remember exactly who, but they said, hey, if someone comes to you with criticism, what do you do? He's like, well, I evaluate, I talk to God, and if it's really an issue that I have, I move forward and I change it. If it's not, I don't care about it. So for me, I've always seen like self-help in that regard. If it aligns me with God and the values of who I am and what I'm trying to accomplish, criticism or self-help, then I apply it and I fix it and I move forward. If it has nothing to do with my goals and my aspirations and who I am, I disregard it. So the more clear you are on who you are as a son or daughter of God and you understand your purpose, then it's really easy to sift out all the crap, right? Like, you can get rid of like 80% of it if you understand your path and your vision. I heard once someone say a confused mind will always say no. So subconsciously, right? Like, if we're confused about our vision and it's not clear, then subconsciously we'll always say no. Like, we won't move forward, right? But the clearer you are, The easier it is to take in information and move forward. The second thing is there's a book, it's called Decisive. And it goes along with another book that Casey Bawe recommended a couple years ago called The Effective Executive. And it talks about how really high-level executives can make decisions like this. The issue with a lot of people that like, don't progress in life is they have an opportunity and then they delay the time to make a decision, whether that be decision paralysis or they're just not good at making decisions or they're anxious or whatever. So an effective executive can shorten the time to make a decision. So for me, you know, I've got my vision board, business plan, everything just in this sucker. So I look at this every day in my morning routine. I look at it on my weekly planning session, on my monthly planning session. So if something hits my table and it's going to help me be a better father, a better coach, a better mentor, a better, a better disciple of Christ and a better salesperson, then I'm going to take it. I'll take it. I'll eat it up like crazy because that's going to help me accomplish this faster. But I think a lot of guys struggle and I've trained, I've trained so many guys in door-to-door and in sales and now in real estate. And the issue with them not deciding quicker is because they don't have that. They don't have a vision board. They don't know where they're going. They're just like this, this elephant, right? That's just walking in circles and there's no, no vision or path for them. But if you have a path, then you can easily take in information, decide really quick and move forward. I would say that's my biggest advice on that topic.

Thank you. And it's funny how it all That all kind of ties back to where we started with like, we, we vision boards and like planning a vision for your life and who do you want to become. And so I guess to our listeners, if it hasn't been clear that these vision boards and like these, these vision binders or like a game plan is super important, I mean, now, now I think, you know, we, we've talked to so many people who have had those and it helps, it helps their life so much. And we see in Jeremy's life like It's actually directed how he makes decisions. Not just— it's not just something he looks at. It actually helps him decide what he's going to do in his life on a daily basis. So Jeremy, I think we'll wrap up here. And I think we just really want to thank you for taking the time to talk with us, to talk to our listeners. And we'll make sure to share this with as many people as possible because it's What you shared today is awesome, and I think it'll have an impact on so many people, especially if they sat here, took notes, and they actually implemented what they learned. Thank you, Jeremy.

Yeah, thanks so much for having me, guys. It's really cool. And again, like we talked earlier in the episode, it's really cool to like chat about these topics with, with other people, um, so that we can all win, right? We can all lift each other up, um, and we can all progress and move forward. So Hopefully a lot of this was helpful and inspiring. I learned a ton, like I took a ton of notes from you guys. So it was really fun.

Seriously, thank you so much. I think something that often gets overlooked in the world of personal development is that if you're not just growing in one area, you're not just, you know, winning in one area. If you're winning in sales, like over the long term, you're probably also winning as a father and as a husband because you can't do any of it without all of it. Like it is a whole person concept in that it's so, so it's wonderful to get to ask questions and to, you know, get some clarifying answers of the, the struggles and the, um, the systems you put in place to win, to overcome these struggles in, with your kids, with your wife, in sales, in coaching, like in, in all different aspects of life. Because it's, it's not all about money. It's not all about one thing. It's about all of it together. And, you know, at the end of the day, our goal is to build, uh, is to inspire, to build strong men, husbands, and fathers, right? To, to, to help this rising generation, um, to become a, you know, a tribe of people who want to grow and develop together. Um, so that everyone, you know, as part of that, that rising tide, everyone can grow. So, um, so really, thank you so much. This has been fantastic. I've taken a bunch of notes already. Um, so thank you. Uh, thank you to everybody for joining us today. And if you found today's discussion with, with Jeremy. Impactful. If you've taken notes as well, then, uh, you know, be sure to leave us a, a 5-star rating and a review wherever you're listening to the show. And, um, if this is, if this has meant anything to you, please share it with, uh, with someone else who, who could use it. So thank you so much, Jeremy, Austin. It was awesome.