22 Jun 2016 · 5 min
Matthew Hussey breaks down three signs a man might be married: he only has one hour to meet, constantly checks his phone secretively, and insists on paying cash. He shares a real story of a woman who confronted a date about these behaviors and he admitted he was married.
This.
Is Love Life and I'm your host, Matthew Hussey. It's so exciting to hear feedback from women who say things like, Matt, I tried the advice from your podcast and I met someone incredible that same night. But occasionally I'll hear something like, When something finally starts to go right in my life, I have trouble trusting that it's real and I just can't enjoy it. If you can relate, I want you to stay tuned until the end of today's show. because there's something really exciting I want to share with you that has the power to change your way of thinking forever. But first, let's get to the episode.
I have a slightly niche topic for you today, which I think many of you are going to be really interested in. But I hate the idea of this episode. I'm going to be honest. But it came from a conversation I was having last week. The episode is this. the three ways to know if he's married when you're on a first date with him. Now, the reason I would never normally do an episode like this is I hate topics like this. I hate the idea that we're second guessing someone and the little cues that they give off in this particular way, because I think it leads to a lot of judgment, it leads to a lot of false assumptions. But I happened to be on holiday recently and talking to this woman who was telling me about a first date she had where she realized something was up and there were things that alerted her to the fact that something was up. And it just so happened, by the way, that she turned out to be right in her assumption. She assumed that he might have a girlfriend or he was married based on the cues that he was giving off on this date. And on the next date, she came out and asked him. She said, I'm feeling like something is wrong. There's something you're not telling me. and he said, well, I, you know, he's kind of skirted around it. And she said, there's something you're not telling me. Are you married? And it just so happens that he said yes. In fact, you know what? This wasn't even on the second date. As this, as the story goes, she actually was texting him that she said after the first date, something's wrong. So what was it that alerted her to the fact that he was married? There were three things, because I, I was interested as a guy. I, the reason I never do this topic is because not just because I hate the kind of assumptions it makes, but I also can't relate to it in any way. It seems so alien to me, the idea that guys go on dates and lie in this way. But of course they do, and quite a lot of people do. So here were the three things that alerted her. One, he could only meet for an hour. Whenever they were trying to meet up, they could only ever meet for an hour. They couldn't meet for any longer than that. It was a very, very tight window and it was always having to be quite spontaneous. He wasn't able to really plan in advance. It had to happen pretty quickly. The second thing was that on the date he was constantly checking his phone, but not necessarily in a way where he explained it and said, oh, I'm sorry, it's my brother. He's, you know, in the hospital. He's here. There's something I've got to just deal with. I apologize. He was kind of checking it in a shady way where it was like he didn't want her to see it, but he was checking to make sure that everything was okay on his phone. And the third thing that was a cue to her is that he paid in cash. He would not pay by card. And she said, it's kind of weird because most of us pay in, you know, pay by card these days. And he made a point to pay for this meal in cash, which is, as she explained it again, I don't agree with all of this, but she, as she explained it, that's something that a married guy does. He doesn't want anything showing up on his records. So, here's my question to you, because as I said, as a guy, this is actually something you guys probably have more experience in than I do, is what are the cues that give this away? And we might be able to crowdsource some interesting answers here. So, what have you discovered are some of the cues that someone is already seeing someone, already has a girlfriend, is already married, and is essentially lying or, you know, in some of these men's speak, just not talking about the situation until you ask, which is always the most insidious way of lying about a situation like that is, well, you didn't ask, which is completely ridiculous. But what are some of the cues that you've had in the past? I'd be interested to hear. Come over to my Facebook page and let's have a discussion about it. And I'd love to hear what some of your answers are as to what gives the game away. So come to facebook.com/CoachMatthewHussey and let's get some opinions going. Alright guys, I will speak to you soon. Take care.
Now, if you can't enjoy the good things that come into your life because you don't feel worthy, I have an incredible opportunity for you. I want you to apply for my Matthew Hussey Retreat. On this powerful program, we'll go way beyond the tips I teach you in my podcasts, straight to the core of your deeper issues so that you can overcome them once and for all. I'll give you the tools to change the relationship you have with yourself so that you can finally achieve the core.
Confidence you need to get the love.
The success and the happiness you deserve. Right now there are extremely limited spots available on the retreat but one of them could be yours. To book your phone interview with one of my expert mentors just go to love life www.podcast.com/retrieve.
