Can Women Have Sex Like a Man?
18 Dec 2015 · 5 min
A Matthew Hussey podcast episode (December 2015) addressing media narratives about a "hookup culture" and contrasting men's and women's typical emotional responses to casual sex. Hussey argues that while casual sex is acceptable for some, most women he’s worked with seek relationships and may feel negatively affected by frequent casual encounters; he advises women to consider how early sex affects men's perceptions of their "girlfriend potential." The episode frames small, consistent actions (like subscribing) as a path to personal goals and ends with calls-to-action to visit his site and review the show.
Chapters
Matthew Hussie here with Love Life. I have a question for you. When you think about going after the things you want most in life, how do you feel? Excited? Inspired? Capable of doing anything you put your mind to? Or do you feel overwhelmed, discouraged, like you're facing an insurmountable obstacle? If your answer is overwhelmed, you're not alone. Most people feel the same way. And the reason is this: Most people think that in order to achieve their biggest goals they have to take big monumental actions and that makes them give up before they even begin.
But the truth is, the key to.
Achieving our goals is consistency. Small actions done regularly. Consistency can make all the difference between achieving your dreams and staying stuck and unfulfilled where you are.
So let's set you up for success.
I'll do my part by showing up every few days with a new new episode filled with advice to help you live your best life. Think of listening to my show as your one small action you can do consistently. Here's your first assignment. Go to iTunes and click the Subscribe button. This will make sure that you get the latest episode as soon as it's released. Ready to get started? Let's go.
Hello, it's Matthew Hussey here and I'm gonna go on a little rant today. I have been seeing increasingly this idea in the media of our new hookup culture, so much so that it seems to pervade a lot of what we do now. I see the New York Times talking about it like it's now a given, this hookup culture. It's like the New York Times seem to have adopted it as a thing now. Oh, we now live in a hookup culture. But when all these people are talking about hookup culture and how, well, ladies, you can do it now, you know, and it's often not men saying it to women, it's women saying it to women. It's women writing books saying women, it's okay. Things are different now. You can sleep with a guy on a first date. It's all good. Every time I hear this, I go, okay, it's. We know it's all good. Like, that's fine. Of course women can sleep with a guy on a first date. That doesn't mean they want to. Every time I hear this, I think, you know what? I've coached 50, 000 women in live events. I've coached 3 million women online. Never has one of them come to me and said, Matt, I need your help. I just need to get laid more. Can you tell me how to do that? No woman ever says that to me. You know why? Because most women don't want that. I'm not going to generalize and say all women. Some women come out of a relationship and they're in a novelty period. They want to have that moment where they have their fun and play around. Women go through that phase, but not in the same way that most men do. Most men can have that player lifestyle for a while and it's not going to affect them in any way for a lot of women. And this is, again, this is going to be controversial. no, people are gonna jump on me for it. I'm gonna say it anyway. Most men don't have their self-esteem affected by hooking up. They don't go around sleeping with lots of women and feel awful at the end of it. Whereas it's more likely that a woman is gonna sleep around and feel used by a bunch of men at the end of that process. That is more something that a woman is gonna feel than a man. So right now, I wanna reverse this change in culture. And the way I want to do it is by first defying that this idea of a hookup culture even exists. Second, I agree with you ladies who are out there proselytizing this idea that it's okay for women to have sex quickly. Ladies, I think it's okay too. Fill your boots. If that's what you want to do, go have fun. I don't mind. But if you want a relationship, then you might need to think about it slightly more practically because while you're being told that it's okay, men are still in their minds valuing their girlfriend potential, the potential of the woman that's in front of them as a girlfriend, by whether she sleeps with him too easily or not. So while you're thinking it's fine, by doing it too quickly, you're still cancelling yourself out of that market of guys who are going, well, the one who I'm gonna be with is gonna make me wait a little bit. She is gonna make me earn this thing. So ladies, I'll finish on this note. You're not a slut if you sleep with a guy on the first date, but you have drunk the Kool-Aid if you think that it's the only way to get what you want. My friends, I'm Matthew Hussey. Take care of yourselves. If you want more information, go to howtogettheguy.com I will see you there and feel free if you want to jump on me to do it there. Take care.
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