Mel Robbins explains why breakups hurt so much: the person became your favorite because they made you feel like yourself. When conflict hits, remember what drew you to them in the first place and use that to navigate the hard times.
Well, I think that's why the tough periods are so painful. Because when you fall in love, and you fall in love with somebody who is truly your favorite person, they are your favorite person because of how being with them makes you feel about you. And that's why it's so painful when your favorite person turns on you. And you start to feel Hmm. As if either they are no longer your favorite person because of things they've done, or because the world is just pressure testing you and you're now bringing it to the relationship and taking it out on them, or something has happened with you and you're no longer treating this person that you once treated as your favorite person You don't treat him that way anymore.
In those first few days when we met, you brought out the authenticity in me. I felt almost like somebody had Unlocked the real me. And that, like, the fake me was— had gone away. And that, that freedom I felt was definitely one of those things that made me feel like you were my favorite. And that's where the hard work is, I think, is being able to wake up and say, this is originally why this person was my favorite, and trying to presence that in the face of the tough stuff that's going on.
Oprah Winfrey: How to Find Your Unique Purpose, Authentic Power, and Calling in Life
