Mel Robbins says people keep clothes from old identities out of guilt, nostalgia, or attachment. Instead, pick three feeling-based words each morning and choose outfits that match. She streamlined her touring wardrobe to one versatile outfit and shoes she could steam and reuse, shifting how she sees her closet.
Chapters
Most of our closets are like a graveyard of the old versions of ourselves.
Everybody does this. There's so many reasons. You might buy something that's very expensive and you have like guilt about it. A lot of people have clothes with price tags in their closet and then they won't even give it away or sell it just because they're like, well, maybe. And the thing with holding on to something because you might be that person, it still doesn't relate to who you want to be. It's like you're trying on that thing for size. You already know it doesn't resonate with you. I recommend trying everything in your closet on for this reason. Like in the exercise, of knowing how every single piece makes you feel, you have to know how it feels on your body.
Okay, so you walk into the closet, "The Art of Intentional Dressing," you pause, you say, "How do I wanna feel today?" And you're looking for 3 words. If you're staring at things that represent who you no longer are or who make you feel, or that make you feel bad about yourself 'cause you can't fit in it.
Yeah.
Or maybe that dude that dumped you bought it for you.
Totally. People hold onto the nostalgic items.
What I love about this is that I will just share that my past life before this podcast, I primarily made my living as a motivational speaker.
Yeah.
And because of necessity, I was giving 4 speeches a week. So 4 speeches in 5 days. I had to always pack a carry-on.
Yeah.
I was constantly on the move catching planes. So I needed one outfit that I could wear 4 days in a row.
Yeah.
That I could then steam at a, you know, Marriott Courtyard Hotel at night so I could get it back on in the morning and it not stink. So I could then roll it back up in the carry-on or wear it on the plane and then steam it again. And I needed like super cool tennis shoes because that was comfortable on stage and it made the all-black ensemble look a little bit cooler. And I dress like that out of function, and I also dress like that because it made my job easier.
Mm-hmm.
And it gave me this almost like identity that this is Mel the job, the speaker.
Yeah, totally.
But what I've realized when I walk into my closet is that that's what I have, and it's the old me.
Yeah.
And I'm still dressing like that person.
Yeah.
And this, just using this method for, I don't know, a week, I am now seeing my closet completely differently.
And that's, that's the great part about it. You, you start getting intentional, you can feel when you're not, and then you start feeling like, oh, I'm, I'm not being true to myself. And even on the day when you're feeling so lazy and so fat and like so not good, on that day you get a chance to do that again and you can find her again. And then at the end of the day when you're really tired and being your best self was really exhausting 'cause you're sick and like it's just been a little bit overwhelming. You can like have a little compassion for yourself and put on the thing that makes you feel soft and cozy. Like it's all these chapters of the day.
