Mel Robbins says women hold themselves back by not speaking up about their work, trying to copy competitors instead of being themselves, and skipping breaks. She takes trips with a notebook, lists what she loves and hates about her work, and keeps only the good parts.
Chapters
Women have a hard time asking for anything. You know what happens? I find you could want to climb a mountain with your team. When the men are halfway up, they'll say, "I'm the king of the mountain," and they'll brag about it. Women will climb all the way up, set up the tent, make sure the kids are fed, everybody's happy, and say, "I had all the help of my team to get here." Women don't take credit. They don't ask for help. They're shy. What a waste of Open your mouth. My God, opening your mouth gets— got me everything I got. Without opening my mouth, I would have nothing.
The other thing that's gotten you everything that you've got is you are authentically yourself. I hope so. Why is that an important ingredient to success?
Well, because I made a mistake once. I decided I was going to watch all my competition, and I got my hair done every week, really puffed up and pretty, and bought new suits. I wanted to be a lady who lunched. Like all my competitors later in life. And I spent the whole year now pushing my business ahead. It didn't move ahead, not a dime. Not— I didn't get anything more for it. But I was the right look, the right person. I spoke properly, everything. And then I realized you'd better just be yourself. You get more. And the minute I turned back to myself, I was up and running.
Well, it also ties to what you have said multiple times because it's very important. If you do it your way, that's the way that's gonna make you successful.
I did nothing the other way, the way everybody else was doing it. I would sit and examine every piece of my business and say, how could I do it differently? And where did I find my ideas? Never at my desk. I never had a good idea at my desk. I got the ideas when I went outside the office. If I was in a slump, if the business was in a slump, I immediately went on vacation with the yellow pad. I went on vacation and I wrote down what I love about my job, what I hate about my job. And I would go back and give away everything I hate about my job and keep what I love about my job. And the business would jump ahead. I always refresh myself, really. And I think that's good advice for someone who's in a slump or can't move ahead. Plan a good time. Just go to Jones Beach by a subway. You only have to take a day off if that's all you could afford. But it refreshes you and gives you new ideas and makes you whole again.
