Mel Robbins and Dr. Mike use five glasses and a pitcher of water to show how work, kids, aging parents, a spouse, and household tasks drain a caregiver's energy. Without refilling your own cup, you run out and burn out.
Dr. Mike, what would you say to somebody who is focused on caring for everyone but not themselves?
Well, Mel, in front of us we have a really good example and a clear example of how this can devolve very quickly into everyone losing. We have 5 glasses here and a pitcher of blue colored water just to show as an example of what happens in someone's everyday life as a caregiver. This is effort.
Oh, this is effort.
This is effort. This is energy. This is what's fueling the ability to do things.
Okay.
And each one of these cups will represent a different scenario in one's life. So, for example, people have to show up to work. People work, right? That takes a lot of effort, a lot of energy. Boom. Some of the blue water goes in there. But they also need to take care of their kids, right? That's important. I've read about the prom situation that you experienced and how stressful that was. Do you see how quickly we're losing the energy? Yes. But then you're a caregiver to your aging parents. You continue losing. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Oh, wait, you have a spouse. Oh, wait, you want to maintain some sort of connection with your spouse. You want to love each other. You want to spend time. You want to travel. You want to do something interesting, a hobby.
Dr. Mike, that's the idea.
Okay.
Oh my God, there's no energy, and I have to cook dinner, go to the grocery store, clean the house. We didn't even do laundry yet.
How are you going to take care of yourself when that's what you have left to deal with? The healthcare system, joy, sleep, lowering your cholesterol. You've taken care of everyone and everything else except yourself. And I don't want to ruin your studio setup here, but if we were being honest, these 4 cups would also have cracks in them and be perpetually losing water and need refills, because that's how life is. So even when you give everyone the adequate amount of attention and effort, there will always be problems that need refilling. And if your cup isn't being refilled You're gonna fail at helping your loved ones.
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