2.5.23 Ending Feeling Sorry For Myself

Hey everybody. Welcome to Made for Mondays. Justin here. I'm so glad you guys are here with us. And as we continue our journey into the month of February, can you believe we made it to the second month of this year? So welcome to 2023, February 5, 2023. As we continue our journey made for Mondays. This week, we continue our time with necessary endings with thought process of the first necessary ending. And the first one is ending feeling sorry for yourself. So. So join us today as we discuss what it means to end feeling sorry for yourself. Those of you joining us for the first time, we are going through my first book called Necessary Endings where I talk about four essential endings of thought processes and mindsets that I believe are inhibitive to growth and inhibitive to moving forward, where I believe that some things need to die in order for you to live. And so in this case, I'm looking at the first necessary ending. So let me tell you the story of how I got there. The first funeral I had, if you will, is in the mountains of Vermont was over. Every word and every thought. Every person who I felt made me feel insecure, sorry for who I was. And some of those thoughts were personal anecdotes or shorthand sketches or simple words. It was old traumatic experiences. It was things I gave so much authority to. Feeling sorry for myself because of my father said or didn't say. Feeling sorry for myself for football games I didn't play in or basketball games I didn't do well in. Feeling sorry for myself for things from high school. And here I am at the time I was in my late 20s and I'm over here feeling sorry for myself for things that happened years earlier. And those little things began to continue to balloon and balloon and balloon to now they were driving my activity. So those thoughts I had, that self talk was so detrimental to who I was because what negative self talk does is mar the divine artistry that's at work within you. We are full and consumed with comparison and insecurity and that comparison ends up stopping you from being you. Insecurity literally says I'm finding security in not having security. And in many cases unchecked insecurity leads to pride filled action, which was my case. It not only made me feel bad about myself, but it made me feel so much pride to where panic and anxiety was driving who I was. It was ridiculous realizing that literally feeling sorry for myself became a safe place to be. Because when we talk about anxiety and maybe you're on here today wrestling with anxiety and panic, let's Have a conversation about anxiety. Anxiety turns rational fear into a runaway train of emotions. So soon, what if something happens, becomes I'm willing it to happen. In anxiety, all it is is hyper focus on what could be so leading you to an overwhelming sense of worry, an overwhelming sense of nervousness, and an overwhelming sense of unease. Anxiety cripples you. It costs you. It cripples you relationally and financially. It costs you relationally and financially. I don't believe that's how life is supposed to be lived. I'll tell you this and true story. I've struggled with anxiety and panic attacks in my life. I literally remember one time I had a church meeting and my heart rate got so high that my watch, my apple watch, thought I was having a heart attack. I've been in moments where panic has overwhelmed off and on for years, and sometimes it grows with persistent areas in my life. I know what it feels like to have that moment where your heart is racing, you cannot control your breathing. Anxiety is real and sometimes it happens causal, sometimes it happens without cause. And so I've even asked God, like, do you not like me? Is there something that you want to do against me? And I remember this moment sitting there in Vermont and I was taken to Second Corinthians, chapter 5, and it says this Christ's love will compel you. The good news is this, that God always has a way of bringing you up from your lowest moments because his love will never fail you. Because when I'm anxious, I'm telling myself I'm less than when I'm anxious, I'm telling myself that I'm not able really because I'm insecure about something in my life. So how can I be a change agent in a community when anxiety is keeping me from that community? How can you be a change agent in your community when anxiety is keeping you from being in that community? Even Paul. I love the Apostle Paul. In scripture, Paul told the church of Galatia, he said this. Make careful exploration of who you are and work you've been given and then sink yourself into that. Don't be impressed with yourself. Don't compare yourself to others. Each of you must take responsibility, doing the creative best you can do in your life. What is God calling you to do? What is God demanding you to do? And where is God calling you to deepen your courage? I want to give you a different mindset in comparison. Consider all the people in your life that you compare yourself to and what if you begin to collaborate with those you are competing and comparing yourself with like Consider that like I consider that even as a pastor, there's people in churches that are doing great work all around us. And what if I stopped competing and comparing and began collaboration? And that's where a lot of amazing life giving things came out. That's where churches have learned from our leadership and I've learned from other church leadership. And we stopped comparing and competing, but we began collaboration. See, God has challenged all of us to come out of our feelings and walk into your future. Anxiety exists when the problems around you overwhelm the peace within you. So stop trying to hide yourself from yourself. It's okay to be you. It's okay to own what you're dealing with, but it's not okay to stay there. We can resolve that. Anxiety is a part of your life, but it is not your life. And there's something so much stronger for you than to live in constant anxiety. The solution to anxiety isn't with Jesus. If the solution to anxiety for you is, is not with Jesus and the peace he offers. You're going to fight a forest fire with a squirt gun. Here's what Scripture tells us. God, Psalm 139 can quiet and calm your anxious mind. So if we're going to do that, let me ask you some questions to try to name where you're anxious so we can stop living into those areas. What are some of your weaknesses? In all honesty, I don't need you to beat yourself up. But where can you look at your life and say, man, I am not strong. Here Scripture tells us his strength becomes perfect in your weakness. What makes you anxious and who makes you anxious? What situations do you have coming up this week at work or in your family that are causing you to be anxious? Let's name them and let's frame them properly. My wife told me something once last week I was going over my schedule for this week, and as I was going over my schedule, I told her I had all of this to do on Monday, all of this to do on Tuesday, all of this to do on Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. I said, my entire week is completely swamped. And she said, justin, you have the privilege to do what you're doing. So it's not that you have a number of funerals. She said, you get the opportunity to minister to people. It's not that you have a lot of meetings. You get an opportunity to meet with people in high positions that make decisions. I know it's a lot of work, but you get an opportunity. I don't have to. I get to. She said Think about the honor and the privileges you have, about the tables and the meetings and the opportunities you have to be who God's called you to be. In the very places that would make me anxious, I get excited. I'm excited to do the work that I'm called to do. I'm excited to meet with who I want to meet with. I'm excited to engage. I'm excited to make decisions. And I'm excited to sit back and reflect and say what went well and what didn't go well, and then do it better the following week when I name it, I then can frame it. Then I want you to ask yourself this. I want you to consider where the areas in your life you're constantly apologizing for. Like, where are you constantly saying, I'm sorry, I'm sorry I did this. I'm sorry I said that. I'm sorry I went this direction. Where are you constantly apologizing? And I want you quit being sorry. Cause you aren't. You are not a sorry creation. What you do isn't sorry. What happens is we make decisions, we make good ones, we make poor ones. And every opportunity is an opportunity. Learn from it instead of regretting what happened. You aren't sorry. You're amazing. Quit feeling sorry for yourself. There's nothing for you to be sorry about. Nothing for you to feel sorry about for yourself. Because you are not a sorry creation. Nothing about you is a mistake. So let's end that today. Let's not allow anxiety to drive us. But as Kapal told us in Galatians, don't be impressed with you. Don't compare yourself to others, but take responsibility for the creative best you can do in your life. Because you can have deep balls of courage that overflow to amazing, amazing streams of grace and peace, not just for others, but starting with you. You're worth it to end feeling sorry for yourself. Well, thank you guys for joining in. Made for Mondays today. I hope that today that encouraged you. I want you to end feeling sorry for yourself. Some scripture references. I'll give you today that if you want to take a listen to read of those Scriptures. Second Corinthians, chapter 10, verse 5, first Peter, chapter 5, verse 7, second Corinthians, chapter 5, verse number 14, Galatians, chapter 6, verses 4 and 5, and John 14, verses 1 through 5. Take a read of those. And I want you to own the truth about you this week. There's nothing you need to be sorry about. You are who you are. Where life has led you is where life has led you. Now, let's craft a future that'll be exciting for you and everyone that's associated with you. Come on, let's repeat our affirmations together. Say, I am me. I can be me. And no one is going to stop me from being me. You were made for Mondays. Mondays don't own you. You own your Mondays. Run into them. Conquer, don't cope, not do it. Well, see you next week.