Bounce Back After You “Blow” Your Diet — With Connie Bennett

Give yourself some credit. I've heard from so many people that are like, oh my God, you know, I really want to have XYZ junk food. But give yourself some credit. You are strong. You are stronger than you may realize. You are bolder. You are, you know, you are just better than you realize. You can do it. You can exercise. You know, this self-control. And then there is one last tip, which is there's something called implementation intentions. So go ahead and maybe plan that. Hey, it may be, it may be challenging at times. I mean, let's face it, that's the reality. But what you can do is then, okay, what are some things that I can do to help me to accomplish my goals?

Connie, welcome to the Book Thinkers Life-Changing Books Podcast. I want to jump right in with you. It's February and people are starting to fail on their New Year's resolutions, specifically the diet-related ones. Everybody ate a lot of food during the holidays and they said, come January 1st, I'm going to change my lifestyle. But here we are, we're 4 weeks into the year. People are starting to fail. What the heck is going on and how can we solve that problem?

Actually, they may already have failed not starting. What we can do is we can rethink failure. I think that people think, oh my God, I had, you know, a few cookies or I didn't work out and oh my goodness, I just blew my exercise routine. I, you know, I ate badly and oh, let's just forget it. What you can do is you can see these quote-unquote failures as stepping stones to success. You can, you can get more motivated when you fall flat on your face. And I should know because that's sort of what happened to me.

Yeah, tell everyone your story. What happened to you?

Well, basically, for more than a decade, I was eating cleanly. I'd written 2 books about sugar. Sugar Shock and Beyond Sugar Shock. But then after the loss of my mother, after a really difficult traumatic year, I blew my diet big time. Specifically, I was hanging out in movie theaters stuffing my face with crunchy, greasy, salty garbage. That's what my— the phrase I created for carb garbage.

Yes.

And I did this for months. I'd gone through a very, very difficult time. And I was so ashamed. I'm supposed to know better. I had been helping people to quit sugar, and yet I was doing exactly what my clients had been doing. So I pulled myself together and I began to go, wait a minute, if I blew my diet and I know better, what about the millions of people out there? And why is everybody eating so badly? Like, what specific reasons are leading them to eat so badly. So basically, in my— I came up with what I call the big 4 binge triggers. So my instance, I had just lost my mother. I was just grieving like crazy, binging grieving. I was doing what I call heartbreak binging. That's what I now call it. And that's one of the big 4 binge triggers. The other one, or the other 3— one could have to do with if you've been through trauma. You could be doing what I call comfort crunching. If you've been through a divorce or a breakup, you could be doing breakup binging or divorce devouring. There are a bunch of other reasons as well, because I came up with 21 reasons. That's what took me so long to write this book. It took me like 7 years because I wanted to figure out why exactly are we failing, you know, to eat, failing to live up to our resolutions, to live up to our goals. And so one of the things that I realized in the course of all this is that people have the wrong approach to losing weight. They're focusing on, okay, I want to lose X number of pounds. That's not what you want to do. What you want to do is you want to focus on your goals. You don't want to rely on willpower. Willpower will only get you so far, and not very far most of the time. You want to rely on what I call goal power. So why do you want to shed weight? Why do you want to work out more? Because you get more energy. You'll have, you know, enthusiasm to be— and the energy to hang out with your kids and your loved ones. Or you'll just feel better and you'll be happier, a lot happier. When you eat better, your mood will completely transform. That was one of the big ones for me. Is if I eat badly, I behave badly. If I eat better, I feel better, I act better. I'm just a better person.

Yeah, Connie, I'm exactly the same way. And now that we've gotten to know each other a little bit, it probably won't come as a surprise to you that I care a lot about what I put inside of my body. And I actually set some pretty crazy goals for 2026. One of them is to have less than 10 drinks of alcohol throughout the entire year.

Oh my goodness.

Because when I consume alcohol, I don't feel great the next day, and I have the tendency to have a little bit too much when I choose to drink it. The other one, and check this out, my goal is to have zero dessert foods for all of 2026. Here's the thing, I don't even really like dessert foods, But when I'm in situations like birthday parties or a fancy dinner, or maybe my wife buys a box of cookies and it's just sitting on the counter, if I'm in proximity to it, I'll enjoy a little bit of it.

But I mean, the whole year— Well, you got my phone number now. You can always text me. Yes.

Well, that's one of my goals is to have zero for the whole year.

That's impressive. But here's the thing. What you wanna think about is why you want to do it.

Because I want to feel my best self, just like you were highlighting. I mean, what you eat impacts how you feel. For those in the audience that are like, Connie, what the heck are you and Nick talking about? What is this mind-gut connection? Like, can you talk about that for everybody?

Well, let me, let me back up a little bit. A lot of people approach weight loss, I touched on this earlier, focusing on losing the pounds.

Yes.

You, you want to think about how you will be a different person as a result of shedding weight. And I also put exercise in there too, because you're exercising to feel better. So don't focus on, oh, you're going to have a better physique, or you're going to have more muscles, or, you know, you're gonna, you know, get rid of cellulite or whatever. Focus instead on all the incredible benefits that you will get, and that will take you— that, that will help you propel you to success. So another thing you can do though is you want to do what I call to flip on your success mindset. So a lot of people that I've coached over the years, they're like, oh my God, you know, I want to eat XYZ cookies or whatever it is. I'm not going to even mention any brand names because I don't want to tempt your audience members. And so I came up with a process. It's called the flip on your success mindset. And what you wanna do is— so the first thing you wanna do is you wanna tap into your desire. Why do you want this? The next thing is you wanna decide. You wanna just decide that you can do it, no ifs, ands, or buts about it. The next step, so it's DDE stands for expect. You are expecting success. That is who you are. You are a healthy eater. And the next step is to V for visualize. You wanna visualize your success. And the final step is to do affirmations. I am a happy, healthy eater. So it's DEVA, D-D-E-V-A. And I, and I call that process the Flip on Your Success Mindset process.

Yeah, I think that's great. I've, I, I love the affirmations piece. Uh, I think getting yourself constantly reiterating those positive statements has been so helpful in my own life. What kind of affirmations do you do, Connie?

Um, you know, it's like eating. For me, eating healthy is just—it stays with me. So my affirmations these days are more about you know I'm a happy, healthy, you know, help you know a person who can help others less so than I eat healthy because I don't really need that. It's like it it literally. I guess I want to. I want to offer your fans encouragement that once you get going, it becomes ingrained in you. That is who you are. Like I am a healthy eater. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. I don't eat junk foods. That's just not me, and I don't want to. So I don't even need to do affirmations anymore about that. My affirmations are about hey, how can I reach more people? How can I reach millions of people? So I have these bold. Bold affirmations these days.

Yeah, me too. And listen, I love your, your thought process about willpower. It can only take you so far. Not all of us can be David Goggins and have unlimited, uh, willpower opportunity. We need strategy. And I think setting goals and then stepping into those goals and talking about how you feel is a great strategy. And so the reason—

Willpower is just like Just tremendous accelerator.

Yes, yes, yes, it is. Um, I— yeah, and I think, you know, as far as the affirmations and reaching millions and millions of people and positively impacting the world, like, go for it. That's exactly—

let's give you— let's give your audience some affirmations though. Okay, so let's assume— I'm gonna assume, yeah, that, you know, you've been eating badly. You've been eating lots of crackers or cookies or chips or You know, whatever. And we can even throw alcohol into the mix. So your affirmation could be something like, I am a happy, healthy eater and I feel great because I eat so well. Something really simple like that can help you, you know. And if you have— if you have a— if you're not working out enough, you know, I enjoy working out because it makes my body feel really good. But again, remember, it's not about the weight so much as it's about how you will feel and who you will become when you eat better. So, and that's another simple one, could be like, I eat better because I feel better.

I think those 2 words, I am, are some of the most powerful words in the English language. I have a personal question. I bet the audience is wondering this too. When somebody exists, usually they don't exist by themselves. They're in a household with other people, and they make this dramatic change like, I'm not going to have alcohol, or I'm not going to have junk food anymore. How do you communicate that to other people so that they support you or maybe choose to make some of those changes with you? Because it's really hard to fight an uphill battle if everybody else in your household or community or friend group That's, that's, that's an interesting challenge.

I think for a lot of people, for your family members, your loved ones may think, oh God, so-and-so is going on another diet again, you know. Oh God, you know, she's not going to last so long. So really, you need to prove to them and to yourself that you can do it.

Yeah.

And you can do it. And do not expect or demand that your loved ones join you. Go ahead, let them see the changes in you. Let them see that you're happier, that you have more energy, that you're waking up at like 6 in the morning saying, come on, let's get going, let's go to the gym. And they're, and they're like, oh God, I drank too much last night, or whatever it was. Um, let them see the changes in you, and then they may become interested to go, huh, Interesting how she or he has changed so much just by eating better foods. So that can really be the way you set a good example, and then they will come along for the ride. But it may take time, which is why I encourage you to have buddies and have, you know, whether it's workout buddies or eating healthy buddies or, you know, relying on the support of other people. I wrote my book, I Blew My Diet, Now What? I was seeking to kind of come off— thank you. I was seeking to come off like an encouraging coach.

And it's very— I think you did a nice job in that.

Yeah. Thank you. It's very interesting to read reviews of your book. And I'll be darned, that's what some of the people have been saying. And that was exactly what I was trying to do. Like, okay, if you don't have Supportive family members or friends? Who do you turn to? So that was one of my hopes, that you could just turn to my book and get some encouraging words.

Yes. Yeah, no, I think you did a great job at that.

And also some, you know, really valuable tactics to help you to, to make it all happen.

Connie, it's hard to bring up the subject of dieting or weight loss without talking about GLP-1s like Ozempic. And so how do you think about peptides and GLP-1s and, and those kind of things as far as weight loss is concerned?

Well, certainly I think it's 1 in 8 people are now on GLP-1s, and it's not— I respect everybody's opinion. You do what's— what you think is right for your body and what your doctor, doctor recommends is right for your body. So where I can help you is that whether you decide to take them, you know, to take it or not, you can have other skills and other practices to help you still. Because you, you don't want to take the drug and then eat like crap. You still—

Because then you're not getting the other benefits of feeling better, you're just looking better. But you're not feeling better.

So you want it— so you want— so if you're going to take the drugs, go for it if that's what you want to do, but then complement that with other techniques.

Hmm. Yeah.

Why don't I just jump into one of my favorite ones?

Yeah, go ahead.

I was going to leave this for the end, but I just love talking about this one. Okay, so I want to tell a little story first. So my mom had just passed away. I had hit rock bottom, and every other night I was going to movie theaters and just stuffing my face with what I call garbage, carb garbage. And it went on and on and on and on. It was like one day after months of this, and I gained 21 pounds really quickly, I was like, okay, enough. Just stop already. So what I did was I sat in my car, and I actually have a CD player still, and I put this CD in. It was a very calming CD. And so I just said, I'm not going to go into this movie theater until I know that I'm going to be able to not have any popcorn. I was like going for it. And so the tune went on and I started to hug and hum along with the music and rock. And I did that through the entire song. And then I was like, well, I think I'll go through one more song just, just to be safe. So I did the same thing through the entire song again. And then I started adding things over time. I started adding things like, you know, oh Connie, it's okay, you went through a really rough time. Anyhow, I went into the movie theater for the very first time in months. I did not have any movie popcorn, and it's now been a decade and I have not had any since.

Yeah, that's amazing.

Afterwards, my background is as a journalist, and I became fascinated I mean, I'd gone months and months and months. I could not stop. So how did all of a sudden I just flip the switch and make it so simple? And I literally just waltzed right by that popcorn stand and I snubbed my nose and I kind of cracked, you know, was cracking myself up because, you know, being a snob to the popcorn. And so best what I, what I discovered since then after I dove into the research Is that what I'd done was I'd combine a variety of tactics. So, and all of them working together, each each of them in and of themselves causes benefits. So humming, hugging, rocking, touching yourself. So they either calm you, boost, release dopamine, you know, release oxytocin. And just, you're bathing in this like wonderful bath of wonderful, easy, of amazing chemicals, feel-good chemicals. And that's what had done it. So I actually outlined in more detail in my book, I Blew My Diet, Now What? About, you know, what each of the various processes do. But I just, I created this process out of necessity. And then when I went back and did the research, I was simply astounded. Like if I'd just done one of them, I could have benefited, but I was combining them all. And so let me just encourage your listeners. So let's say they are somewhere and they're tempted. You can either do the entire hug, hum, rock, leave process, or you can do any version of it. And if you're embarrassed and you don't want people to see you, You can literally just hide your hands under here. You'll look a little bit like you're cold and you can just move a little bit and you're literally, you're doing part of the process. It's pretty astounding. I was really excited about all that. So my goal with my book, what I was seeking to do was to come up with what I call feasts. Fast, easy, awesome, simple, tested strategies, but that could be used, that could, that could, um, cause wonderful effects quickly. Now, none of this like, oh, it's going to take forever. If it was a process, if it was a process that took like, you know, half hour, no, I don't want to put it in my book. So that's basically what I sought to do. So the Hug, Hum, Rocker Leap process is a very quick one, and it's, it's fun too. You can— and you can even have your family join in the fun, and they don't even have to know what you're doing. You just say, hey, we're gonna have a dance party, and, you know, nobody can know. Um, there are other processes that I created as well that are just, you know, designed to be fun.

Yeah, I think that's what's great about your messaging is, like you said, you're, you're a supportive coach-type person. And part of supporting people is making sure it's sustainable and fun. And so yeah, I love those techniques. I love all of the positive hormone chemicals that get released behind the scenes. And I think what you're doing is you're bringing awareness to the moment that you are in control, not the garbage like you highlight. And it just feels like no matter where you go or what you do, You're presented with bad food options, whether it's entertainment like the movie theater or a concert, or even, you know, every single supermarket on the planet has some garbage in it, even the clean ones.

That's why I like to say that we are living in a junk foods jungle.

Yes, we are.

We are besieged by temptation.

Yeah, you just even turn on the TV.

Thousands of junk foods are, you know, vying to land in your belly. But you don't have to give in to that. And when you know that they're out there, then you can use some really simple but powerful tools to, to resist that temptation.

Yeah, when I was in college, I had a very bad habit of eating somewhere between like 3 or 4 full family-sized bags of spicy nacho Doritos every week, every single week. Now, I was exercising a lot, and outside of the Doritos, I was making a lot of healthy choices. So it didn't look like I was eating a ton, but it made me feel gross. And so I decided, like you're suggesting, to change my identity. And I started to say, I am not the kind of person that eats junk food. And it's been probably about 10 years since I've had a Dorito. I just cut them out completely, even though they were my favorite food.

And like you said, I would, I would flip the language just a tad bit and say, go ahead, or not. So I am, I am the kind of person who eats only healthy foods. Yes. Or, you know, I'm the kind of person who eats only healthy foods and, and that's all I want to have.

Yeah, because I want to feel my best and I want to be the best for my family and be the best for my business and be the best for our customers and for our podcast guests. And yes, yes, yes, those positive statements only.

Well, that's why you're on all the time. I mean, I so enjoy watching your videos and your Instagram posts because you're always just like on. But if you weren't, if you weren't taking care of yourself, you would not be able to be present in that manner and to encourage us in that way.

Well, thank you, Connie. What's your favorite part of the Hug, Hum, Rock Relief process, if you could only choose one that somebody could implement right now while they're listening, what do you think it should be?

I, I think the hugging part. Um, I, and I probably found more research about hugging because it can be done so easily. And, you know, I'm, I'm hugging myself now and you don't even know it because you can do it quite surreptitiously and nobody knows. I mean, you could stand and, you know, you could be in the grocery store and you're kind of, you know, eyeing that Well, like you said, Doritos. You know, you're eyeing that bag of Doritos and you just like, you know, just hug yourself. And again, there's huge amount of research that backs up these, all these techniques. That's the thing. I'm a journalist. So everything that I talk about, every tip, it has to be validated by tactics. There were so many references. So When my book was done, I don't know, we had like maybe more than 100 pages of references. It became so unwieldy that I decided let's just move all the references to my web. So you won't find any references in my book, but it takes up just all this space on the web.

Yeah, well, one thing that I found really impressive about your book, um, is that yes, you could cite 100 pages of references. But one thing that I thought was great was how many amazing people wrote testimonials for your work. I mean, I saw so many people that I admire and so many people that are just famous for different areas of health, like, singing your praises. How did you get connected to all of these people?

Ah, I mean, a lot of them I had known from before, But a lot of them I didn't know, and I just approached them cold. And I mean, maybe they'd heard of my first 2 books, Sugar Shock and Beyond Sugar Shock, and they just were kind enough. I mean, colleagues just, you know, colleagues are just the most wonderful. They're just wonderful because you're all, you all have a common goal. You want to help people to be better. And so I was very fortunate. I had a lot of people come on board.

Yeah, Book Thinkers family, if you're listening or watching today's episode, here's some of these names that just love what Connie has written. And think about clicking the show notes below and buying a copy of the book once you hear some of these. Mel Robbins, JJ Virgin, Jack Canfield, AJ Jacobs. I saw Kristen Butler, who's been on this show a couple of times. And Connie, we've had lunch, you, you, Kristen, and myself.

Yeah, I just met her.

Yeah, John Lee Dumas is in here, Nir Eyal, Dave Asprey, John Assaraf, just so many massive names in the personal development and the health space. And they're all telling you go buy this book. So Book Thinkers family, make sure you check out the comment section down below the show notes and grab yourself a copy. And this would also make such a great gift for someone. So even if you're listening to the episode right now and you're like, yeah, I didn't relapse on a diet, I'm actually doing okay. We can all think of somebody who's struggling right now that might use a book like this as the way to overcome their problem for, for good.

And I really love, love, love, love hearing from readers. So if you did get my book, you know, I'd love to hear what you think. I'm not telling you what kind of review to write, but I just would love to hear how it resonated with you.

Well, make sure if it's a positive one that you go leave a review. Um, February is now National Bounce Back Month.

Yeah.

How did that happen and what does it mean to you?

Well, um, I started thinking about all the people who've blown their New Year's resolutions. It's like, well, what are they going to do now? They feel discouraged, kind of down on themselves, you know, maybe even a little desperate. And, you know, and so I was like, let's, let's come up with a month to help them to bounce back. And I like to use the phrase bounce back boldly, but I did— we didn't put it in the title. So I literally had to go through this whole application process through the National Day Calendar that puts this, you know, day— you pick a day and they put it all together, and they accepted my proposal. So it's the entire month of February is National Bounce Back Month. And what that basically means is you're, you're gonna regard any— if you ate badly last month, you get a do-over. You get a like New Year's do-over and you can start again. And look, all right, little confession. It's not junk food. Junk food is not my issue. But I've been working on this book for a really long time. So let's just say sometimes maybe I've been watching Netflix a little bit too much. So, well, the, you know, the best of us have, or all of us have something we want to work on. So that's one of the things I want to work on. Well, today that we're— today we're recording it is my half birthday. And I'm like, and, and so if you can look for a day that means something to you, you can— okay, that's you, that's your day, you're starting over. So I'm starting over today, and, uh, less Netflix, more reading books.

Yes. I am a huge advocate of that change right there, Connie. And for the audience, if you feel inspired to do less Netflix and read more books and you're looking for a good place to start, oh, I know the right book for you. Well, Connie, it's been a great conversation.

And of course, follow Nick.

Yes, yes. Uh, it's been a great conversation today. For those in the audience that would like to learn more about you and follow along on your journey, or maybe grab a copy of the book, where should they go? What should they do?

So my main website is www.connyb.com. So it's just connyb.com.

Okay, great. We'll put that in the show notes below.

And then that'll take you to wherever. Like, I'm more on Instagram these days than I like on Facebook. That seems to be the place where I'm more gravitating more. Um, I lost— I kind of lost I lost my whole Facebook fan page. You gotta be really careful with who you trust these days. Like 125,000 people went poof.

Well, here's my final question for you. If the book went poof, but you could leave the world with just one simple message from the book, what would that be?

That's a good question. I think give yourself some credit. Like, I've heard from so many people that are like, oh my God, you know, I really want to have XYZ junk food. But give yourself some credit. You are strong. You are stronger than you may realize. You are bolder. You are, you know, you are just better than you realize. You can do it. You can exercise You know, this self-control. And then there is one last tip, which is there's something called implementation intentions. So go ahead and maybe plan that, hey, it may be challenging at times. I mean, let's face it, that's the reality. But what you can do is then, okay, what are some things that I can do to help me to accomplish my goals? Yes.

Well, what a great way to wrap up the conversation. Thank you again, Connie. For those in the audience that are still with us, Thank you for sticking around, and check out the show notes below for a link to Connie's website as well as a link to buy the book directly. And remember that when you gift a book to a friend, they give the credit for that book not to the author but to you as the friend that gifted it, which is just such a great reason to give more books away. Again, thank you, Connie, for the conversation today.

Thank you so much for having me, Nick.