Nick HutchisonFounder and CEO, BookThinkers

How to stay present during conversation, with Lou Diamond #short #shorts

13 Oct 2022 · 1 min

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In this short interview, Nick Hutchison asks Lou Diamond how he manages to stay fully present during conversations, especially when he used to get distracted by his own questions on his podcast. Lou explains that his ability to stay present stems from a combination of genuine appreciation for the interaction and a structured practice he calls "Connect Your VOICE" (V‑O‑I‑C‑E). The exercise involves visualizing the flow of the conversation, recognizing the opportunity, and embodying the identity he wants to bring to the dialogue. He also emphasizes injecting charisma and personal energy into every exchange, which fuels his focus both as a listener and a speaker. Finally, Lou points out that appreciating the feeling of being ignored helps reinforce the desire to give full attention, turning appreciation into a practical motivator for presence.

Chapters

How do you stay so present during conversations? I know when I was first starting the Book Thinkers podcast that I had a very difficult time not looking at my questions and responding to the person who just said something really cool and asking a proper follow-up question. Like, it's tough to be present sometimes. You're always thinking about what you want to ask next.
Spectacular question, and I've tried to figure it out myself. So part of it is that I have a genuine appreciation. You heard me talk about, um, in the book I mentioned the Connect Your VOICE, V-O-I-C-E. That is an exercise that I live and breathe by, and that's to visualize how the conversation will go, appreciate the opportunity, know the identity I need to be when I'm having the conversation. And the 2 parts which are going to get to your point here: add your charisma and energy into every single conversation. And that energy is required when I need to be a listener and when I need to be there. I have to have that energy there to stay focused. Uh, but I also know that there's an advantage. It's a real sense of appreciation. It's a real simple thing. If you were talking to someone else and they weren't paying attention to you, how would you feel? And that's all I need.