Sometimes, self defeating behaviors can be done with good intentions!

You just highlighted that sometimes self-defeating behaviors can be done with good intentions, and that's something that I hadn't really thought of before. Sometimes people self-harm knowing that they're self-harming because they're looking for— it's like a cry for help or something. But what you're saying is sometimes your intentions are good, but the outcome is bad. That's interesting. It is, and it is very discouraging when you start to realize what you did.

In other words, you want to lead an organization, you want to lead your team, and so you show up at the meeting and you do what you— I mean, nobody gets up in morning and saying, I want to be an idiot. We get up in the morning and we have this perception that we're doing the right thing. We're making good decisions. I didn't decide today I want to make stupid decisions. I didn't decide today that I want to, like, unnecessarily offend somebody on my team. I didn't wake up today thinking, I want to be pushy today. You know, I'm going to push people into conformity.

You know, because that's what leaders do. No, no.

I think most of the things that we do that are self-defeating