The PROVEN system to WIN at everything | Cody Adent

As long as you maintain responsibility, accountability, and control, I think you can accomplish anything. Don't just continue because you think you're supposed to. Go do the thing you want to do. Well, and that's really the premise of my book. Like, I'm just a regular dude, you know, and I don't got anything special to say. But when you lose, it gives you the opportunity to sit down, refocus, and look at it. Well, and I think that's when we learn, right? Because we don't have much introspection when we win. It happened, and then you move on and you move forward and you grow because of it. And so I knew, like, I'd have to get a loan for school or I'd get a loan for business. And I thought, well, one of these two is going to pay me back.

I know for sure without that process, we could have never done this Cody, welcome to the Book Thinkers Life-Changing Books Podcast. How are you feeling today?

Oh man, I'm feeling great. Just excited to be here.

Yeah, this podcast is a long time coming. So why don't you introduce yourself to the audience? Tell everybody a little bit about who you are, why you're on today's show, and a little bit about Winning the Moment, your brand new book.

Yeah, absolutely. So my name is Cody Adent. I currently live in St. George, Utah. I am the president and CFO of Vibrant Management. We're a boutique hospitality management company, and my book Winning the Moment just came out on January 3rd. And I found Nick and the Book Thinkers crew on Instagram, and it's been an awesome relationship so far. And I'm really honored to be on this platform that's had so many amazing guests.

Well, let's kind of set the stage with what you were like when you were a little bit younger. I know you talk about sports. We'll dive into that in a minute, but I'm really interested in why you decided not to go to college. And why you decided to get into running your own business instead.

Yeah, well, I had a hard time learning as a kid. Like, school just didn't work for me. The way my brain works isn't the way the teachers wanted it to work, you know? And so I just was like, I just never believed in it really, right? And then I figured out how to like game the system and do well enough, but it was just never a drive that I had. And I didn't have the opportunity, you know, from my parents or money to just be able to like go to school. And so I knew like I'd have to get a loan for school or get a loan for business. And I thought, well, one of these two is gonna pay me back, so I better— I think I'm gonna go that option. And so ended up starting my first business. I was 19, called The Cell Phone Guy, back in the day when trios were cool and you paid for text messaging and you had your 5 friends you could call for free. And it was really— I got such an amazing education from that. I think I learned so much more from doing it. than I would have in preparing to do it.

I've got a question. What you just said is interesting. I could take out a loan and either owe money or make money. Is that a perspective that you have in hindsight, or was that your perspective at the time? Like, were you aware enough to know that you were going to take on debt that you'd have to repay versus debt that you could use to make money?

No, that was the motivation then, like, because I knew I was going to have to finance it one way or the other, and I thought I better get one that's going to pay me back. Because it's all on me. I got no one else to help me pay for it.

Yeah, that's a mature perspective. Luke, go ahead.

Yeah, no, I was just going to say so many people are put in the same position and they don't even think of other options. They're like, well, I have to go to college. That's what I have to do. So they take out the loan, they finance it, and then they're in tons of debt. They find out they hate college. So do you think that perspective, did that come from influences around you or is that just from inside of you? How did you get to that perspective?

That's a great question. Yeah, no, that's a great question. And even back then, right, like 15 years ago, however long it's been, it was even, I think, more common to go to school than it even would be now, right? Because you couldn't become an influencer on YouTube or Instagram or have those financial funnels that exist today. Um, but no, there was no influence. I mean, both my parents— in fact, I think it was the first person, like, in my whole lineage of family that didn't go to college. Like, I remember my mom being all disappointed, and they were both teachers, so, like, they didn't love that. My dad, my dad had 3 degrees, and so I was an anomaly, to say the least. I think my brain just always worked different.

Huh.

Because it's usually— I feel like it's usually the exact opposite. Like, you're the first one to go to college, not the other way around.

So that's right.

That's really, really wild because I even know that I have friends that have parents that didn't go to college. They went to college and then they're trying to encourage their kids to go to college because that worked for them. And it's just really interesting that you got out of that. So I'm very happy that you did. Because like you said, it's not the route for everyone, which is really awesome.

There's careers like, had I, had I wanted to pursue that path, like I would've loved to be an attorney or like something that really requires that degree to do that profession. But I just never saw the value in like the business degree where I thought I'm gonna be so much better off just learning and starting and doing than I would be like preparing for the opportunity to do it.

Yeah, right. That's so cool. And sorry, Nick, I'll, I'm just like, I'm so fascinated by it because like, It's such an uncommon— just, it's so uncommon. And like you said, even, even in today's, um, climate, we have YouTube and all these other routes that people can go, but it's still— college is still, still pretty pushed. It's still pretty pushed in school and everything else. So it's just, it just, it intrigues me when I— we find somebody that just thinks so outside the box, and I think it's just so cool. But, uh, Nick, go, go ahead, sir.

Well, I'll share an interesting perspective.

I was—

I'm reading the book right now, The Gap and the Gain, and in the chapter I was in, it was talking about how they created college like back, you know, in the earlier, early days because we had all these kids doing child labor. And so they created schools so they could create more educated workforce, right? But they were still meant to be laborers, just more advanced laborers, not to be freedom thinkers, not to be leaders, right? Just to be laborers, uh, just with a larger skill set. And so I never actually knew that until today, but I thought, oh wow, how interesting. And yet we still have this program that has this huge expense associated with it. And there's so many things out there now, like online courses and certifications, the trade schools. Like, there's so many different ways Yeah.

There's a YouTube video that I saw back in the day. There was a spoken word poet named Suli Breaks, and he had a video called Why I Hate School but Love Education. And so, I fit into that bucket too, Cody. When I was younger, I was not a great student. I wasn't engaged. I was more of the jock stereotype, not much of the academic. Even in college, I found every way that I could to skirt around the rules and pass without having to apply myself. And then here I am now. I've read more books than every single kid that I went to college college with or high school with, right? And so, there's another saying that I like. It says, traditional education will make you a living, but self-education can make you essentially whatever you want. It could be riches and travel and a unique lifestyle and all that kind of stuff.

Yeah.

So, let's talk a little bit about the subject of winning. There's a line that you have in the introduction that says, a loss is just a loss in the moment. And I circled that because One of the things that traditional education teaches us that I hate is that failure is a bad thing. You're taught not to fail on tests and quizzes and in front of the classroom, but in the world of entrepreneurship or running a business like you are today, loss is actually a good thing, right?

Well, and I think that's when we learn, right? Because we don't have much introspection when we win. Like the Super Bowl just happened. So if you use that example, the Chiefs are just out celebrating, having a great time, drinking beers on a bus, having the time of their life. Jalen Hurts is in the gym. Like he's in the film room. He's not going to let that happen again. You know, Jalen Hurts is going to take way more education from that loss than Patrick Mahomes will from his win. But part of why he won is because he's had a loss in the Super Bowl. Right. And so I think that when you win, you just build that momentum and that's good too. But when you lose, it gives you the opportunity to sit down, refocus and look at it and say, oh man, what could have I done differently? Reevaluate.

Are there any big losses that come to your mind throughout your career? That were like, wow, this is a big moment for reflection and an opportunity for growth?

Yeah, I mean, lots of them. I had one when I was really young. I got— I had a buddy who was doing some investment stuff and it looked really good and he had the Range Rover and all the things. And I was like, this is great. Like, I'm gonna give him money, he's going to make me money. And it ended up being a Ponzi scheme. And so I lost all my money and it was like I was young, I lost like $30,000 and that was like everything to me, you know? And I leveraged myself. So not only did I lose cash, but I lost leverage. Um, and so that was devastating, you know, like at the time, in the moment, it felt like, oh my, I'm never going to recover from this. But then of course you do, because we always progress out of things. And so looking back on it, it's like I wouldn't change anything, you know. I'm so glad that it happened, and I love— and I learned so much because of it, uh, and I wouldn't change it. And I think most of us, we look back on our life at those trials and tribulations, the, the common, like, feeling and emotion is, I'm glad it happened, I wouldn't change it. It's just hard to have that perception in the moment. And I think that's what I want to challenge people to do, is be present, realize that it happened, and then you move on and you move forward and you grow because of it.

And there's— I'll finish up a thought. I just had a quick thought while you were saying that until you embrace that difficulty and experience loss at least once, then you don't know that that's part of the process. You'll always try to avoid it until you realize that, oh, wow, I can make progress this way. And then you might even seek it out. So, it's kind of cool to hear you talk about it like that because a lot of people that we interview, they're very successful. And what we try to do sometimes is take the superhero cape off and make Cody Aiden a normal human being for a few minutes.

Well, and that's really the premise of my book. Like, I'm just a regular dude, you know, and I don't got anything special to say. In fact, reading The Cap and the Gain, he said in his book he had a line that said, stop looking for I'll be successful when. And I was like, because I always say stop looking for I'll be happy when. And it's like, I never read that book until today. And of course, he thought the same thing I thought because all the good thoughts have been thought. We're just resharing them and repurposing them. But to the point of losing, I think part of what's so important is in our adolescence is we have to teach kids to lose, especially in today's world where there's participation trophies and everyone's a winner. Because then they go through childhood never knowing the pain of a loss, and they get to adulthood and their first boss is like, gives them a corrective criticism for being late, and they break down emotionally because they've never felt a loss before. So I've got my daughter's 9 and my son, my son is 6, and I am currently undefeated. And guess who? And it'll continue to be that way until they can beat me, you know? And they hate losing, and they'll like throw themselves on the love sack. And, uh, my wife's like, just let them win one. I'm like, absolutely not. They'll win one when they deserve to win it. And when they do, it's going to feel so good, right? Because I'm teaching them that they need to learn to lose.

I love that. I have, um, 3 kids of my own, and I'm kind of doing something similar. And my wife is always telling me the same exact thing. She's like, I am curious though, like Do you have any strategies in place for them that you're teaching them to cope with those losses? I haven't personally come up with anything yet. I am like, I am like pretty ruthless, like with games and stuff. Like I play chess with my son at checkers and I beat him. Like, I'm like, you're learning. Yeah, he gets better every single time, but I haven't really found anything to help him really cope with the loss.

Do you have anything? I just try and share my experience. So like my son just started playing basketball. And his first practice, like, the kids he's playing with have been playing for a couple of years, even though they're only 6, and because they have a basketball court in their house. So it's like they get to play all the time. And so they were better than he was. And driving home, he was like, oh, Dad, this is like, it's not good. I'm not good. And I said, yeah, you, you can't be good yet. Like, they're 2 years ahead of you, so don't expect to be where they are today. You're just starting, you know? And I told him, like, I was not good either as a kid. Like, it took me 10 years to be good. That's just the journey. And like, when we, when I coached their, their teams, the city leagues and some of the sports don't keep score. But I make my wife keep score on the sidelines and I let the kids know if we're winning or losing because I want them to learn that lesson. But I think just sharing experiences with them, I don't have like a real technique outside of just like sharing with them my trials and tribulations.

Yeah. And that's kind of, that's kind of what I do at this point too. But I was just seeing, yeah, I just wanted to, I was just curious, but I love that because my son, even just like a year ago, he's only 6 years old, but even a year ago, like he had a lot harder time with losses. But now he always says, he's like, Yeah, I know, Dad. Losing is part of the process. Like, he just tells me that every single time he loses, and it just cracks me up. So it's cool to see other dads doing that too, because it's not something I come across very often because we are in this world of, no, everyone's a winner. And I just hate it. I hate it. I don't think it helps anybody or anything really.

Well, yeah, and he's building that scar tissue and that muscle memory of like, he lost and everything's fine. Nothing bad happened. He just lost the game, you know? And so now he gets a chance to play again. He's really more driven to keep playing because he hasn't yet had that like exuberation of a victory. And when he does, it's going to feel so good. He's going to remember it. Like, I remember beating my, my dad in basketball the first time as a kid. I must have been like 8 or something, you know? And I still remember it because it's like he never let me until I earned it.

Wow. Yeah, they sometimes call that the art of anticipation, like leveraging hope. Always having something to look forward to is a big motivational force.

Yeah. For sure. And I'm wondering, do you have a way that you define like winning? Like maybe it's small wins versus big wins. Do you have a way that you define that in any way or is it just like a win's a win?

I think it depends on the situation because like if there's something where it's tangible and there's a score, then that's obviously predefined for you. But if it's not something tangible and it's really up to your perception, I want it to be up to the audience to define it for themselves because everyone's at such a different place. That's why in my book I didn't say like, do, do all of these activities. Like, this is what your day should look like, because I'm at a different place in my life than someone who's reading might be. So I really want them to define it for themselves. And I think that's where people feel lost, is that they're stuck in a comparison mode and they never took the time to define what they really want, and they're just going after what society has indicated that they should want without ever really realizing if they want it. In fact, I was teaching at the college here this week, and I started— I asked all the students to write down their definition of success as the first thing I did. And then I asked some of them to share it. And one of the girls, a part of her definition was a life that is content. And I said, look, I don't know the definition of content, but I feel like that's average. And so if you're shooting for average, like, that's a little disappointing. Like, I think you can do more, you know, like you're at the start of your life and this is like your aspiration. So let's, let's, let's improve that a little. And then as I went through, I was talking about winning the moment. As we got through at the end of it, I had them rewrite the definition. And so it was awesome to see how once they took the time to think about like, well, what do I really want? And I think it really for her stemmed from fear. She was afraid to say she wanted something great because she was afraid to fall short of that aspiration. And so I don't think you should let fear be a guide unless it's a positive way and you're using courage to overcome it, you know?

Yeah. Let's unpack something you just said that's also a big theme in your book, which is the fact that so many of us compare ourselves to society's expectations. 4 years of college, a bunch of debt, you go work at a big business. You know, you end up getting married, you have your 2 and a half kids, etc. I mean, that's in the United States. That's what all of us look forward to until you realize that you can define your own dreams and pursue something unique. And so, you encourage the reader in here to pursue something that's uniquely fulfilling to them.

Yeah.

So, how are you able to break that paradigm? How are you able to see outside of it, especially at an early age because you didn't go to college like a lot of people do?

I think really it started with my desire for education. To your point, like, I didn't want formal education, but I knew I had to learn because there was so much I didn't know. And like, it started for me with financial books because my parents were terrible with money. And so I was like, well, I don't know how to be good with money, but I know I for sure don't want to be bad at it. So I just bought all of these books on finance. And what's interesting is that every book on finance tells you to do things differently. So I started to realize like, okay, well, clearly I get to define what I want because Every single one of these experts does it differently, and they're all experts, so no one really knows, you know. And so I think that's what started it. And then as I got into that, then it became more self-development and growth and mindset and psychology. And so really, I just— I finally found that thirst for knowledge, like, in my young adulthood. And I think that's what really created, through all the books I've read, that, that, that belief and that thought process.

Yeah, it's so interesting because I think that's such a key, because we think that there's this, this one path We believe that there's this one path, this one key to success, this one answer for all of our problems. And the reality, there just isn't. And I have noticed that recently too because we've been to a couple of conferences recently and it was so funny because one speaker got up and said, you know, you gotta be patient, you gotta put in your time. And the other person got up and said the exact opposite. They're like, go after what you want today. Today's the day, take action, you know, screw everything else and just go. So It's cool that you also saw that at a young age. And I'm also curious about going back just a little bit. You were talking about what people should do. And do you have a way that, I don't know, maybe like a framework that you coach people through to get out of the thing that I should want, like the I should want contentment? Because I mean, growing up, I was taught that.

Yeah, right. I think it's just through self-discovery and exercise. You've got to really, it's like finding your why and finding that purpose. And it's so hard because it's never surface level, right? surface answer is going to be that historically accurate answer or contentment or whatever society wants. And so, because that's just what we're like, we're programmed to believe. And so you got to go further and keep digging. And I'll never forget sitting in the hot tub with a buddy of mine, and we're talking about success. And I was like, well, if someone like is on the beach every day and just surfs, like that's successful, that's what he wants to do. And he goes, you don't, you don't believe that? And I said, of course I do. He goes, there's— I know you, you definitely don't believe that. I said, I don't believe that for me. I don't even know how to surf. So of course I don't think that's successful. But if that's what the person wanted and they found a way to do that, then 100% they're successful. And we had this really interesting back and forth, and that's why that image is in the book. It all stemmed from that conversation because I wanted people to understand, like, you truly do get to define it. And it's really through trial and error too. I think too often as a part of society, we believe that we should know what we're going to do. And it's like, I, I never knew I was gonna be doing this. Like, I never knew I'd have a book. I never knew I'd be in tourism. Like, my life has changed so many times, and I'm only 35. So it's like, how many more times is it going to change? You know? And as you get more— and I think we think as society, they feel like once you make a decision, you can't change your mind, right? Like, oh, you flopped on what you said you're going to do. Well, if I get new information and new knowledge, of course I'm going to change my mind. It would be ignorant of me to know more than I did yesterday and not feel differently about it. So I think that it's okay. You know, if you're in school right now and you realize you don't want to do it, then stop doing it. Don't just continue because you think you're supposed to. Go do the thing you want to do.

Cody, there's a part of your book where you say that people who write down their goals are 42% more likely to achieve them. So I'm curious, how long have you been writing down your goals for, and do you have a specific framework for writing them down?

Gosh, I've been doing it really as long as I can remember. Like, even back in high school when I played basketball, like, I wrote down what I wanted to average.

Yeah.

And then I would like keep stats on— I had like the schedule printed in my bedroom. on the closet and I said what I wanted to do and then I would write down every game and keep track, keep track of it. And so I've always liked tracking things and so I've really done it forever. I think at the beginning of the year I always sit down and think about like what I want to do this year. But then if I'm doing something new, if I like when I really got into golf, it was like, okay, I want to get to where I can break 100. And then it was like, all right, I want to get in the 80s. And so if there's something new that I bring up, I just keep moving that field goalpost, you know.

Can you share any of your 2023 goals? Do you have any goals around the book? Maybe that you can share with everybody?

The biggest thing is living the moment, right? Because now that the book is done and I took so much effort and work into it, like I've got my bracelets on and I'm winning the moment every single day. And so along with that, I've got those like end-tier goals. So I wanted to be— I wanted to exercise at least 6 times a week this year. I wanted to drink less than 2 times a week. I wanted to read at least 30 books. I want to meditate every single day. And it's like, those are the things that I'm striving to do. But every moment I'm just making those decisions, right? And so like this morning I woke up when my alarm went off. Usually I'm a perpetual snoozer. I wanted to stop that. And so that's like a big shift for me. So I move a bracelet when I get up. And what's amazing is we're like, what, 50 days in or 55 days into the year? And already it's so much easier because now those habits are ingrained, you know? And so now I, now I get to make new improvements and it's been really awesome to really live it, you know?

Can you tell us a little bit more about the bracelet system that you use?

Yeah.

So the idea is, the premise behind it is, as humans, we only have so much willpower in a day, right? So as the day goes on, our willpower dissipates. That's why happy hour is at 5 and not at 2. And for me especially, my decision-making is really bad at the end of the day, right? So like, I'll generally make good decisions when I wake up until about 9 o'clock, and then it just goes off the deep end. Because then if, you know, if I have a glass of whiskey, then I'll have another glass of whiskey, and then I'll binge some Netflix, and I'll eat a sandwich, you know, and then my night's ruined. It was fun, but it's ruined as far as production goes. So then my next day is ruined. And so how do I put value on those decisions at the end of the day? Because like a glass of whiskey tonight doesn't change my life. But if I have one every single night for the rest of my life, at some point that scale shifts, right? And so how can I create value in that? And so What I do is when there's something, when I'm at a crossroads, like when the alarm goes off, that's your first one. And I have to make a decision. Am I going to get up or am I going to snooze? And it's kind of like Mel Robbins' 5-second rule. It's like you've got to decide in the moment, like, I'm going to do this thing. So I get up in the morning, I move a bracelet, and then I know I found for me it works best if I meditate in the morning. So as soon as I move that bracelet, then I hit my meditation, which obviously I'd rather just lay there, like scroll on my phone. And so after I do that, I move it, then I go right to the gym to get my exercise out. I move it.

So anytime that I'm doing that thing that I know I I want to do.

That's like my dopamine hits, like having a task list and you cross something off of it. Or the other day, I love chocolate and I probably eat it more than I should. And I was in the office, we got these delicious chocolate bars, and I was like, oh, I'm gonna get a chocolate bar after lunch because I'm programmed to think I need a reward after I eat. And so I go into the break room and I'm like, ah man, I know I shouldn't have this chocolate. So I just filled up my water, drank it, and moved the bracelet because really what I wanted was the dopamine from the chocolate, not the chocolate itself. And then my craving was gone because I had, I had done that for myself. And what happens is what I want people to do in their life is create momentum. So there's a thing called the winner effect. There's a huge science behind it. And what it says is that when you win, the biology and the chemistry in our brain changes and it creates a new self-sense of confidence and intelligence, and you're just more capable of performing the next task. And so I want people to have a tangible understanding that they're making these wins, right? Because too often you'll be like, oh, today was all right, or I don't really feel successful because we forget all the things we did to get to where we are. And so I want people to have that visual representation of looking at your wrist and being, man, I'm already killing the day. And when the night's over, now if I got 3 bracelets left and it's 9 o'clock, I'm like, okay, let me read a chapter. Let me get into bed before 10 o'clock and let me not fall asleep to the TV. You know, like there's 3 wins. Boom. Now I won the day. And I don't win every day either, right? It's not like you have to be winning all the time. Or I'm overly driven by wins. I just want people to create that momentum for themselves and understand if they lost why they did. And so then maybe they can be better tomorrow.

It reminds me a little bit about, a little bit of our first discussion when you were telling me about 75 Hard. Luke and I are both doing 75 Hard, but you were telling me that that program is so strict that if you lose, you have to restart, whereas with your system, you're just focused on the next day. So can you Differentiate your system a little bit from 75 Hard.

Yeah. And I think that just for me mentally, I'm just not strong enough to do it like you guys are, right? So, I got into it last year and at 35 or 36 days, I got sick. And then so, I said, screw it. I already blew it. I'm not starting all over again. And that had been a perpetual thing in my personal life, not professionally, right? Because if I falter professionally, I'm right back on the horse. But personally, I'll let myself down. And so, whenever I set— if I was like, I'm going to go to the gym every day this week, And on Wednesday I missed, then it's like, well, all right, I'll go again next Monday. I'll try again. Yeah. Because for some— yeah, that loss just felt so defeating and like, oh, the chain's broken now. So whatever, you know? And it might be, it might not even be next Monday. It might be 6 months before I get back in the gym. And then you start building those stories in your mind of like, the gym sucks. I don't like it. It doesn't make me feel good. The people are going to think that I'm overweight. They're going to wonder where I've been. They're going to ask me. And you tell yourself all these stories. And so your body starts to react like this gym is this terrible place. But if I could just get back in there, I'd realize like, oh, this is great. I feel better after. I'm so glad I'm here, you know?

Yeah. There's a— have you ever read the book called The 12-Week Year?

No.

One of the—

so the concept there is that people set New Year's resolutions, and so instead they say every 12 weeks or every quarter, really every 13 weeks, set quarterly goals and personal quarterly goals, not professional ones, so that you get that like Christmas morning feeling of setting New Year's goals.

Yeah.

But 4 times a year. And your system kind of takes that to an extreme. It's like, do it every day. Every day you have 10 wins that you're looking for. And so, it keeps the excitement, the dopamine hits up.

Yeah. And it allows you to know, like, I might lose today, but I have a chance to win tomorrow. And the idea is just keep getting back on the horse. I really like that.

It's so funny. I've actually been doing 75 Hard since the beginning of this year, but I have failed 2 times because of sickness. And I've started back up every time cuz I'm like, I told myself I would get through it twice this year. So I'm like, I've gotta do it. But it wasn't a failure because I, I'd like, but I literally physically, like there was a couple days this year that I literally physically could not get outta bed. Like I'm vomiting and everything else.

Yeah.

So I agree with you though, like to start back up, it was so much more difficult because I'm like, I just, I lost all this progress. I just did it for 30 whatever days. So, it's horrible. I love that, that system that you've come up with is just like this, it simplifies it because you're right, we all go back to that, oh, I'll start on Monday, and then before you know it, 6 months down the road, you're done, which is crazy.

Oh, go ahead.

Sorry.

So, my wife had done this thing earlier in the year. She had worked out like every day for 34 days straight and then she missed a day and she was like, oh, I'm just so disappointed, like a failure, like I feel terrible. I was like, what? She's like, yeah, I didn't even— it didn't work out. Now it's over. I was like, Megan, you just worked out for the longest consecutive streak of your life. Celebrate that victory. Like, it's okay to rest today. You just did something amazing. How could you possibly conjure up feelings of disappointment when you just accomplished this amazing thing? And we're just programmed to do that, you know? So you just gotta— because at the end of the day, whatever we think is our reality. So if we believe it's good, it's good. If we believe it's bad, it's bad. And so you have the power to change your whole life by your thoughts. And that's part of this too, is let's just think differently about the things that we're doing.

Yeah, true. It reminds me of this meme or something I saw a year ago. That's the professor gets up in front of the class and writes 10 math equations and one of them is wrong. And so he surveys the class and says, hey, what do you guys think of these 10 equations? And everybody says the same thing. Well, number 4 is wrong. And he says, well, how about 9 of them are right? And so we're doing that to ourselves.

Yeah.

That's a version of what we're doing to ourselves. Instead of paying attention to the 34 wins that Megan had, she was paying attention to the one loss that she had. How about the 34 wins? It's amazing. So my question real quick is, where should people go to get bands if they're interested in performing the same system that you use?

So if you want to use the ones that I have, you can just go to CodyAidan.com and we've got them in the shop. But what, like my wife, for example, she likes to wear her frilly, like crystal bracelets. And so I think anything can work. So if there's your own type of bracelet that you want, or if it's even rubber bands or it's hair ties, like anything that you have will work. But if you want to have these ones, and I'm still in the process of like refining, like what's the best band that I can find? I'm really enjoying these ones right now that you can get on my website. But really anything will work.

Okay. That's awesome. And how long have you been— yeah, real quick, how long have you been using this system? Is it something that you just came up with over the last couple of years?

So how it all started was in 2018, I realized that dynamic where I always showed up for everyone else, but I never showed up for myself. And so I realized like, man, what is causing me to fall so short when it's about me, right? Because like if I worked for Nick and Nick said, I need you at the Book Thinker's office at 6:00 AM, I would be there. But if I told myself I want to be at the gym at 6 a.m., there's not a chance I'm going to be there unless Nick was going to be there too. And then I would go because I'd feel bad because Nick was going to be there. Right. And so I needed to switch that dynamic for myself. And so I made a spreadsheet that just highlighted all the things that were important to me, why it went green and it went red, and I tracked it all. And so that level of accountability and that reward system allowed me to have this incredible year in 2019 where I was super productive. I lost 40 pounds. It was the best personal life I've ever had, the first time I ever really showed up for myself. As an individual. So I put that out on LinkedIn in January in 2020, and I didn't have like much of a LinkedIn following. I'm not very great with social media, so I usually would get like 5 or 10 likes, whatever. And this one blew up. It got over 2,500 likes, over 500 comments, a bunch of shares, like a quarter million views, went all over the world. And I told people like, I'll give you my spreadsheet for free if you want it, and I'll create it for you. So I'd create a spreadsheet, Nick's spreadsheet, Luke's spreadsheet, and send it to them. And people would follow back up with me after and tell me how well it worked for them. But being in tourism and hospitality, when COVID hit, I allowed myself to like make excuses and get in that victim mentality. And I kind of burned off all of that progress I made because I was just like, poor me, everything sucks, you know? And so I was like, gosh, why is that spreadsheet not still having the value it did for me? And in that interim of COVID I took a role with the Utah Tourism Industry Association as their executive director, and I had to get keynote speakers for an event. And I got Will Bowen to come speak, who wrote A Complaint-Free World. And his idea was if people complain less, the world would be better. And I think he created that when he was a pastor at his church and he had one purple bracelet and you'd move it from one wrist to the other when you did. And so that way you would like, like have that recall like, oops, I just did that. And so I thought that could work. And then I realized, like, thought thinking about my day, and at the time I was reading a bunch of books on psychology. And so I kind of just put it together and I was like, this, this is something. And then I started trying it for myself and I had a bunch of success and And then as fortune would have it, the universe created an opportunity for me to connect with my publisher and it went from an idea to a reality.

That's so amazing. I love that because accountability is such a huge part of winning too. And like you said, it can be really difficult to be accountable to yourself. It's a lot easier and sometimes it's hard to be accountable to others too, but it's a lot easier to be accountable to others. I find that problem definitely plagues me throughout. It's been throughout my life. But just more recently, I haven't gotten up as early. Like, I'm slacking in those areas. So, I like this. The bracelet system is really cool. I don't have it, but I'm like, after this, I'm definitely going to grab those because I need that in my life. Yeah. So, very, very cool. One more question I have, like, I don't know, kind of around that, might be going back a little bit, but lots of people let fear stop them from taking any actions at all. And the reason I'm asking this is because you kind of alluded to it a little bit, the story about the girl who was saying, oh, I want contentment. How do we, like, what are some of the barriers that stand in our way from being the person that we think we should be to being the person that we want to be? Like, I know in my own life, there can be a lot of fears around not doing the thing that I want to do. So, do you have any advice even to like getting over those fears in your own life?

That's a hard one because I talk about it in my book. It's like my advice for you isn't very good because the advice is just to start. And it's like everyone wants it to be more than that, right? They want like, they want this like magical, like actually, if on a Tuesday you stand on one leg and you, and you look at the sun and then all these good things will happen. But really it just comes down to starting, right? And I think that's what prohibits so many people from getting where they want to be is they're just afraid to start because they're afraid of judgment and of comparison, and they're comparing the start of their race to the middle of somebody else's. And so they feel lesser than. And so I know it's not great advice, but it's just the best and the most true version of it. And that is to start doing that thing you want to do. I guess first I'd say define the thing you want to do, because too often I think we're just like walking in circles or in the perpetual rat race, not really knowing where we want to go, but really take some time to have some introspection and some thought and say, who and what do I want to be and where do I want to be doing that thing? And then once you determine that, then just start doing the things to get there.

Yeah, we interviewed an author, Ken Rusk. I think you're going to collab with him soon, Cody. And he always says, he says, it would be weird if you got in your car and you just drove out of your driveway aimlessly and just kept driving, right? That'd be weird.

Yeah.

Nobody does that. We always have a destination in mind when we get behind the wheel. Yet in life, which is much more important than where you're driving that day, so many of us are just aimlessly driving around. We don't know whether or not it was a successful day. We don't know whether or not we're headed in the right direction because we haven't defined what we want to do. So, yeah, it's an interesting point. Cody, tell us about in chapter 2, you have a kind of a funny story, tongue-in-cheek a little bit, about your first-grade spelling test. So, could you tell everybody that story and then maybe the lesson that you want to teach from it?

Yeah, this is like a story I love and don't love to share. But, and I talked about how I wasn't, you know, I had a hard time in school and, uh, in my adolescence and in first grade, like it was a, gotta be one of our first spelling tests. And so in first grade, like a lot of us forgot to put our name on the paper because we're new to school. So there's like 8 spelling tests up at the front of the table and teacher's like, come grab your test and put your name on it. And so I walk up and I know I didn't do good and there's like all the random tests and there's one that's 100. So I was like, yoink. And I took, I took the 100, put my name on it knowing it wasn't mine. And then, so of course, the smartest girl in our class, she got mine, which was a 0, and she was crying, you know, she was all upset. But the teacher let her retake the test and she got 100 as well. So in the end, we both won. And I think it's tough because obviously I'm not advocating for cheating, right? Or saying like to take credit for someone else's work. But, but the moral of the story for me was I just had to find ways to win that were unorthodox because I didn't know how to do it otherwise. And at the end of the day, we both ended up getting 100, so I felt good about it. But it also showed me like, okay, I have a deficit in this traditional understanding of education, but I've got an advantage in my way to understand situations and how to get the outcome that I wanted. Again, not— I don't think that's great advice for people to take long term, but I think it just shows at an early age you'll start to see those strengths that you have.

Yeah. Well, now you're running this boutique hotel business. What are some ways that you apply that unique mindset of let me just go find a way to win to this business that you're running?

Yeah, that's a great, that's a great question. So when we started Vibrant, we started in April of 2018. So we're almost at the 5-year mark and we've had lots of ups and downs throughout that journey, right? Because it's a business we started from scratch. I can remember one day we were doing a branding with this company and we didn't have enough money to make payroll. It was a Friday. They're coming in for this branding session. So I said, hey, you know, it's customary for you to pay half of your invoice now and the other half when it's complete.

And he's like, oh, okay.

Yeah, no problem. Brought in a check and then I covered payroll. I totally just made that up on the fly because I needed to have the money in the bank to cover the people's payroll that day. And then like even when we started, like we'd say, okay, our services cost X and they'd say yes. I was like, well, maybe they're worth more. And so then we charge a new rate and people still said yes. We said maybe it's worth more. And so that same thing that we once charged like $4,000 for, we'll now charge $60,000 to $100,000 for it, right? Because we just had to learn like where, where is our, what's our work actually valued at, right? And you don't know until you keep pushing and someone tells you no. And then there was a moment in COVID when all of our clients had to let us go. And so we said, we'll keep working for you for free because we believe that like the business is gonna come back and you can't afford to not have our support and service. But that was very challenging because we still had our, our team involved, but there was no income coming in. And so we got down to $11.37 in our checking account and we needed to have like something to save the day. And we had a client who we'd done a rebrand for at a fishing lodge in Canada. And he was in the process of creating a Hawaiian skincare line. And so we reached out to him and said, hey, look, you love the branding that we did for you on your fishing lodge. Let us take a stab at your Hawaiian skincare line, which is totally outside of our niche, nothing that we've ever done before. And we ended up getting rewarded that contract. And I think it was, it was a pretty hefty size contract. And so that revenue, because it was over the course of like 8 months, and so he paid us an installment every month. And so that got us through COVID and allowed us to stay in business.

What's— last question, because I just have to ask this. What's it feel like to have $11 in your checking account and an entire team working with you? I mean, what does that feel like knowing that you're responsible for that?

Terrifying. You know, it's scary. But I think that because I lost so much as a kid and I've had things and I've lost things, you know, I never thought like we're not going to get through it. Like somehow, some way we're gonna get through it. So it wasn't like a sense of doom or like it's over. It was just a sense of like, let's figure it out with a little bit of urgency or a lot of bit of urgency.

I was literally gonna ask this, the, the same thing. So, um, it's so wild because like, I know like that situation, just even like hearing that like gave me pangs of anxiety in my stomach.

Like, oh man.

Because I've owned businesses and I've been to those points where it's like, oh man, I only have $300 in my account. How am I going to cover payroll? And then you have to like get creative about it. But yeah, it's really awesome that you had the mentality to get through that. Do you have any like, I mean, I know your whole book is about this, which if anybody's listening to this right now, like go read this book because it talks so much to how to have this mindset that Cody's Cody's had, which is great. Uh, but do you have any just like quick tips for anybody listening today that it's like, hey, if you're in this really stressful situation, like what should they do? How should they think about it? How should they— how can they get out of that?

I think the best thing you can do is be focused on the solution, not the problem. Like we could have sat and had a conversation and dwelled about like how we got there, or even that in this particular instance it was out of our control, right? Uh, but I think you have to take ownership of everything and realize in your life that Good, bad, or indifferent, your life is a reflection of your choices and habits. And I think too often people want to put their struggles or their obstacles on some outside source, right? And so you can't fix something that's not you. So if, if you put it internally and say, what, what could I have done different? What could I have done better? And now you are back in control of the situation. I think that then you can get through it. So as long as you maintain responsibility, accountability, and control, I think you can accomplish anything.

Yeah, that's That's so good. That's so good. What did you say? Responsibility, accountability, and control?

Yeah, I was off the cuff and I was thinking like, damn, that was good. That was so great. I was like, I'm glad it's being recorded. I'm going to go back. That's a good one. That's a highlight.

That'll be on Instagram tomorrow.

Yeah, for sure. Yep. And it goes back to like, because I used to, a lot of my experience was in sales. And so sales is so much like every day's wins and losses, you know, like it is, it is like the sports arena of for business, you know? And so the difference between the good salespeople and the bad ones is if I talk to a good salesperson who had a difficult day and I said like, you know, what's going on? What happened? They're like, oh man, I'm sorry. Like my girlfriend broke up with me and I'm just struggling personally. Like I just wasn't on top of it today. Like I'm gonna go home, take some time, I'll come back, I'll be better tomorrow. And it's like, okay, I respect that. Like I totally hear you. Go take some time, get right. The bad ones would say slow today, we don't have very good inventory, our prices are too high. And so it's like, how can I help you? if every obstacle is something that you have no control over, right? There's— it's impossible for me to help you achieve your goals because not one obstacle is something that you can do anything about. And so let's, let's change our thought process and say, you know, how many people did you greet today? You know, did you talk to 100 people or did you talk to 5? Because you could have the same level of skills and sell twice as much by doubling your effort, you know. And so I think, I think that's where I really kind of learned that mindset because I got to see it every single day. The people who had that good, healthy belief in themselves and ownership and responsibility, whether they were skilled or not, that mindset was really a bigger differentiator in their success than their ability.

Yeah, I think that's one of the biggest differentiators between successful and unsuccessful people in general. It's that word responsibility. In chapter 4, you mentioned your work group reading books together. Is that something that still happens?

No.

So we have started doing Entrepreneurial Operating System, EOS. I highly recommend it for anyone who has a business, like jump into it. I was against it because I'm conservative and it was expensive, but I'm so glad that we did it. It totally shifted our business. And so now we run our meetings through a process called Level 10s. And so we used to use the book as like a part of our meeting. And now that we're on EOS, we don't need like that, that outside source to make our meetings productive because the Level 10 allows us to have really effective meetings.

Interesting. So I just, as you know, I just read Traction.

Yeah, right.

What's the next step for somebody like me with this business, Book Thinkers? Is there like, how do I sign up for that platform course, whatever it is?

So you can find an EOS implementer in your area. So they're all over the United States. Ours here in St. George, his name is Craig Andrews. And I, so I thought like, oh, I don't need Craig, I can do it myself. Like I'll read all the books and I could just do it. And I remember after we'd been through it, it was like we were on our 4th meeting with him and I told Spencer who had just started with us, he's like, what's this day gonna be like? I was like, oh dude, we'll be out of there by noon, like we're killing this thing. We were there for 9 hours, you know, like it wasn't even, we weren't even close to as far along as we thought we were. And so that coach will take you through the process. It's a 2-year process and then after that you can continue with them if you want. But like we did our first annual with him this year, we went to Scottsdale and had a 2-day annual offsite meeting and we had never, which is so Interesting. But we'd never intentionally thought about the next year at Vibrant, right? We were always just like going, which is so funny because so much today has been about like thought and intention and goals. But for whatever reason, we just didn't do it in our company because we were just too chaotic and hectic and just going. And so taking those 2 days and really saying like, what are we gonna accomplish? How are we gonna accomplish it? What's realistic? And you have this really open, honest dialogue and I know for sure without that process, we could have never done the things we're doing now.

Wow, it's an amazing testimonial. So this is what's cool about interviewing you where you admit you're a normal guy running a normal business that has challenges and you can be open about leveraging other tools. Like it's not about you being the superstar, it's about you being open to other people helping.

Yeah, absolutely. And I think that's one of the things that's so important is that too often, like when you are reading a book or you're watching someone on, on whatever platform you watch them on, you think like, oh, I can never be that way, you know, but we're all capable of being that way and they're not any different than we are. And I think so when I talk to the students at the colleges, I always say like, I could tell the story in 2 different ways. I could tell you the story of Vibrant that makes it seem like we are the most badass management company that ever existed and we're absolute rock stars and I am like Nostradamus and I see everything coming. Or I can tell you the real story. And I think that has so much more value. I may not look as cool, but they're gonna take so much more away from it. And when I tell them that I had $11.37 in my bank account and we had to get through it, they can relate to that because they may only have that in their bank account right now, you know? And I think you get so much more when you're honest and you tell a transparent story than if you, you try and perceive yourself to be the thing that you think they want you to be. Like, I don't care what they want me to be. I'm just gonna be who I am.

Kudos to you, man. That's amazing awareness.

Yeah.

Thank you.

I tell you what, that, that's another thing like so many people struggle with because they want to, they, I mean, we, we, we live in the world of Instagram and social media. We just continue to, we continue to show the highlight reel and even like a lot of the people that are trying to be more transparent still are showing the highlight reel. So yeah, us, I mean, yeah, we, we all, we all struggle with that. So it's really cool to see you out there like, hey, this is the real story. This is how it happened. These are the struggles that I had. Because I love that because, like, sorry, like you said, people learn a lot more from that and then they also feel like, man, I can do this too.

Yeah, absolutely.

And I think that's so important because so many people, I mean, I know I see so many people on Instagram, I'm like, yeah, like you just said, I can never be that. Like, you look at Alex Hormozi, he's like, dude, that guy's making hundreds of millions of dollars a year. I can never be that guy. He's a little bit better because I think he does share some of those vulnerable stories, but still—

He does.

It's like you look at those people and you're like, there's just, there's no way. So I appreciate guys like you getting, getting out there and just being honest and transparent about that because it gives somebody like me and tons of others a lot of hope because it's like, okay, I may be struggling now and I may not be able to see the, the end of the tunnel, but I can get through it eventually.

Absolutely.

And yeah, so I just, I just really appreciate that. Is that something that you've, you've always, is that something you've always done?

Have you always been pretty transparent about Um, I don't think I ever like had a story to tell before, so it's hard to say, but I probably wouldn't have been when I was younger because I was more in like that, that rat race or that perception of success and like always trying to portray like that I, that I was the guy, you know, even if, even if I had self-doubt that I wasn't. So I think that came with time and understanding and also fatherhood. Like, I think you learn so much when you become a parent because your life stops just becoming about you and starts becoming about them. So I think that gives you a lot of opportunity for growth. And then even stuff too, like Gary Vee, when he talks about like, because I was always like, I was always the youngest person to do a thing. So like when I became district manager at my company, I was the youngest to do it, the youngest to become district manager of the year. I was the youngest in all of these things. That was like a badge of honor that I wore. And so once I stopped being the youngest, I kind of felt like, oh shit, like what? Who am I now? Because I'm no longer the youngest. Like I'm not that special anymore. And so like hearing Gary Vee's message of like, You have so much more life ahead of you. Like, I'm only 35, so I'm only a third of the way through my life. Like, I have more in front of me than I do behind me, you know? And I think it's important to have that. And when you see people who have found amazing success, like Harrison Ford didn't start acting till he's like 40 or something, I think. And that could be wrong, but it's somewhere in that part of his life. And so it's like, if you aren't doing the thing you want to do yet, it doesn't mean you can never do it. You just, you just have to wait your time and start ultimately kind of what we talked about before. Yeah.

And that, I think too, that gets— sorry, Nick, I'll let you go, but I think that's just, just a little comment. I think that's something that just gets in the way of so many people, like even like waiting until they're 40, right? It's like they just never started. But you can still, even if you are 40, you can still do it. You can still start. It's not too late. And yeah, 'cause I know I've been there too. Like I'm 29 years old and there's some, sometimes I even get in that mentality like, oh man, I'm, I'm past my prime. There's all these little Kids on TikTok, you know, 19, 20 years old making millions or whatever, right? So you even feel like there's times that I compare myself to that and think I'm old and I'm like, hold on, wait a minute, like check myself. That's a crazy perception. I'm still very, very young. I still got a long way to go. So appreciate you sharing that. Sorry, Nick.

Well, no, what you just said reminds me of our interview with Hormozi a couple weeks ago. He told us he sold his first business for $46 million and what was he in his late 20s? And he's like, I felt like a failure. I'm like, that's weird, right? But then at the same time, what he said to us is he goes, the business you guys have right now would blow the minds of people living in rural Ghana or something like that.

Yeah, absolutely.

It's always just a matter of perspective. Like you say in your book, Cody, like you determine Like how your brain operates. You get to choose that. So, there's something I'd like to wrap up with. You say it a little bit later in the book. It's a statement that you use to snap out of autopilot, which is, don't choose to lose. Don't choose to lose. What does that mean?

I think it means that there's moments we make decisions we know, like at our core, we don't want to do, but we do them because it's easier or it's more comfortable or it's more fun. And so, I think that when you have that moment, it's really— it's funny because I talked about Mel Robbins or 5-second rule. It's kind of the same. It's like saying something out loud to instantly shift your thought, right? So it's like, okay, and it's 9 o'clock, I'm watching basketball, and I look over at my beautiful liquor cabinet and I see my beautiful whiskey and its beautiful decanter. And all I have to say in that moment is just don't choose to lose, right? Because once those 5 seconds are over, I'm fine. Like, once that urge comes and I defeat it, then, then it's over. Like, and I'll, I'll get through the night, then I'll, I'll get in bed and, and I'll win the night so I can win the morning. And so it's just a little thing you can say to yourself in a moment of weakness when you know you're about to make a decision that's counterintuitive to what you've decided you wanna do for yourself to try and help you snap out of it.

Yeah. And we have a lot of those little moments of weakness throughout the day for sure. So I love that.

Of course.

I really did love that in your book too. Such a great thing cuz I actually just used that a couple nights ago. So, we have, my wife got M&M's, which I don't know why she did that, but she got M&M's and I'm like, honey, why'd you get these things? I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna eat those. Like, I'm just, it's gonna be, you know, 10 o'clock at night. I'm gonna be like, oh, we're gonna crack it open. And literally I just had that pause moment and I was like, okay, don't, don't choose to lose. It's fine. Don't need the M&M's. I still haven't eaten any outta that bag, by the way. So I'm doing good, but it's still out there.

That's a great, that's a great story too, cuz they say like, the thing is, is you are exercising your willpower every day by not eating 'em. So just get Get rid of them, you know, because even though you haven't eaten them yet, you're consciously choosing to not eat them all the time. And so, because of that, your willpower is being dissipated, and at some point, the M&M's are going to win. It might not be today or tomorrow, but if you don't get rid of them, you will eat those M&M's.

Oh, for sure. And that's usually like— that's usually the rule. Like, I— we have in our house, we don't do any junk food, but she was like, oh, they were a dollar or so at the store. She's like, I wanted M&M's. So, she cracked open and had some M&M's. But yeah, I literally told her because I was like, this weekend we're getting rid of those things. So have whatever you want to have and that's it because I can't keep doing this every day.

I love it.

I wanted to share my biggest willpower hack recently. Luke uses one of these too, but this is a kitchen-safe timer and my phone, that's the thing that I'll eventually lose to. I'll just end up mindlessly scrolling on Reels and I don't even realize how I get there. So you could put your phone in here. And then you just turn the dial to like an hour, you push it down, and I'll show you what it does. I'll just set the timer to 20 minutes or something. So you'll see it will lock itself in a second here. And now you literally can't take this lid off until that timer—

I've seen those.

Yeah.

That's awesome.

So, but by putting my phone in there, I can't succumb to it. I can't get my phone out.

There's no option. The battle's over.

Yeah, the battle's over. So, hey, man, awesome podcast. An hour flew by. So, for people that are on the fence and they say, okay, Cody seems like a cool guy, awesome concepts from the book, I don't know if I want to buy a copy of the book or not, what's your final message to them?

I think the message is, is that you're always going to be more informed after any book that you read. So, if you want to progress and be further than you are today, Be it my book or somebody else's, pick one up, you know, like just do it. And mine is really good and pretty affordable, so it's only $17.99. So I'd probably take mine.

I agree with you 100%. There's the testimonial. And for people that want to learn more about you, what are some of your socials? What's the website one more time?

So my website is codyaiden.com and also thevibrantteam.com. Uh, most of my socials, I'm really only on Instagram and LinkedIn. They're just Cody Aiden on Instagram, Cody_Aiden. But if you go to Google, and type in my name, C-O-D-Y A-D-E-N-T, it'll basically give you access to anything that you'd want to find.

Boom. Thank you for the wonderful conversation, my man.

Yeah, thank you so much, Cody. Appreciate it.

Yeah, thank you guys for having me.