Tommy DobczykOpportunity Zone Advisor, OZ Wizard · Director of Development | Certified Opportunity Zone Advisor

Real Estate Deals: Business NOT Dating! Avoid Red Flags #shorts

19 Jun 2026 · 2 min

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1:46

In this short dialogue, Tommy Dobczyk and two speakers debunk the myth that real‑estate negotiations should follow a "dating" style of building rapport before requesting paperwork. They argue that a property transaction is a purely business interaction: you should be upfront about numbers, ask for all relevant documents (appraisals, contracts, financial statements) from the start, and remain professional without trying to befriend the seller’s agent unless a partnership is required. The conversation highlights that when an agent resists providing documentation, it often signals hidden issues such as an inflated asking price relative to the appraisal. The speakers stress that treating the deal as a business transaction, not a personal relationship, helps uncover red flags and protects the buyer.

Chapters

The broker said that usually it's not customary and polite to ask for all documents the first day. So he said you have to approach a real estate deal like, like a dating process. Is she breaking up with me? So the first day needs to be smiles and butterflies. No, that's not true. Is that not the case? No. So you can go in there straight off the bat? You can go straight off the bat. Okay. I didn't know if I had to build rapport.
No, that's not how it works. This is not personal. Okay. This is not personal. We are not getting into business with them. We are there, we do the numbers, and the numbers tell us what to do. Yes, we can be polite about it. Yes, we can be professional about it, but this isn't about building a relationship with them unless they're going to be partners with us doing the deal.
Okay, so it's totally okay and totally normal to be extremely upfront with numbers and documents.
Yeah, just for the sake of understanding, we are not courting this individual for any kind of romantic or sexual encounter. So therefore, all the, all the typical rules that we would use for engagement are out the window. We are 100% there for business. I'm not asking this person to dance with me. I'm asking them to do business with me. And they're on the other side of the counter. When you're talking to a realtor who's trying to sell a property, and you ask for documentation and they give you a hard time about the documentation, it's because they're hiding something. That's the—
So if the only reason somebody would hide that is if they are selling it at a higher value than what the appraisal is, correct?
Correct. And so if they, if they actually had a contract with somebody and appraisal was done, that's a piece of documentation that's very valuable. And so It should stay attached to the property and go with the property.
Yes. You're not needing to make friends with the seller's agent.