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Breaking free from codependency: Escaping the addict's grasp

3 Feb 2024 · 1 min

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0:38

Amber Hollingsworth explains how codependency with an addict becomes emotional obsession: you fixate on making them see the truth, slip into gaslighting, and spiral deeper into trying to fix them instead of protecting yourself.

Chapters

Addicted, just like the substance user is addicted, but you're addicted to the relationship. And so there's a lot of pain involved in that as well.
Really, it's a little bit more complex than that. It's like, what happens is you get obsessed with trying to make this person see the truth. I don't really think it's so much you're addicted to the relationship, but it's like you see this problem, and you do love this person, but you can't understand why they don't see it. And so you get so preoccupied with trying to make them see it, trying to convince them, and then they start gaslighting you and telling you crazy. You don't see it. So then you get really, really more involved in it. Because then you're like, now you got to prove it. If you could just see, this would be fine. There's just this desperation.