Kanye level Confidence

So what happened? But what happened is that I started to let other people's thoughts and opinions get to me. People don't always understand the decisions that you make. They don't always understand the passions that you have. They don't have the vision for you that you have for yourself. They can't see it because they see life through their own lens, colored by their own experiences, infiltrated by their own fears. So when they see you doing something that they don't understand, they're going to have thoughts about it. You're listening to the Circle C Project. Welcome to the Triple C Project, the podcast that helps you gain clarity, boost confidence, build courage so you can live life. I'm your host, Ryan Spence, the big Lord Dropper, life coach, author, speaker, lover of hoodies, hip hop and big, hairy, audacious goals. If you're tired of living the life you think you should want and ready to start living the life you do want, this podcast will help you get from where you are to where you really want to be. So now with friends, I invite you to grab a drink, take a seat, and allow me to guide you towards living a life that's lit. Hello, welcome to episode 11 of the Triple C Project. And at the time of recording, it's just over a week since the release of my book, the Triple C. Gain clarity, boost confidence, and build courage so you can live life. Lit. And it's been great. It's been a really, really amazing time seeing people receive their books, seeing what they say about the book. Thank you to everyone that's written a review that sent me a dm. It really means a lot at the time of writing. The book currently sits at number seven on one of the Amazon best seller lists in its category, having bounced around from a high of number two down to around number 20. And it's pretty much like a roller coaster ride watching the numbers go up and down. And look, the numbers don't mean anything in terms of my worth, in terms of the value and the worth of the book. But it's always exciting to follow them, right? The things that really mean so much are the reviews and all the messages that I've had from people as they've received the book, as they've read it, telling me they've been inspired by it, telling me how much it's helped them, telling them it's the book that they needed. So thank you very much for that. And if you you're reading the book and or you've read the book, please do leave a review. Head to Amazon in the country where you bought it and leave a review, an honest review, as to what you thought of the book. And if you're having issues with Amazon, as I know some people are, go over to Goodreads and drop your review there. Really, really helps to get the book out to more people. I wrote the book because it's the book that I needed, that I wanted back when I was in big law and couldn't see a way out. And I know that there are other people in that situation. So the more people that know about the book, hopefully the more people the book can help. And you can help those people by writing a review so that they find out about the book and they know what it's about and they know how it can be helpful to them. So go ahead to head to Amazon, or if you can't do Amazon, head to Goodreads and leave a review and send me a message. Tag me. Tag me in a screenshot of your review and screenshot of you holding the book just so that I can thank you for supporting the book and for being here with me on this journey and being part of the community. Okay, so what we're going to talk about today. So today I wanted to talk about confidence. And I wanted to talk about confidence because, well, obviously it's one of the three pillars of the triple C method, but it's also something which people say they don't have. People often talk about the fact that they lack confidence, that they don't have the competence to do the things that they want to do, that they don't believe that they can get the things that they want. So I wanted to talk about that, but through a slightly different lens and in relation to something that I watched recently, which I think you might relate to. So if you've been following me for any time, you know that I'm a big hip hop fan. Hip hop is life, you know, and I have been for a very long time. And yes, despite his recent issues or outbursts or just his general demeanor and behavior that some people don't care for, I'm a huge Kanye west fan. I mean, Kanye west has had some fantastic albums. My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy is probably one of the top albums ever, not just in hip hop. And he's produced some amazing records. And if you don't know, there is currently a documentary on Netflix called Genius all about Kanye. It's a three part documentary. I highly recommend you watch it. Episodes one and two in particular are fantastic. Three is a little bit meh. But as a Body of work. It's a great thing to watch. So why am I talking about Kanye in relation to confidence? If you haven't guessed already, watching this documentary really gave you an insight into why Kanye is Kanye, why Kanye is the way that Kanye is, why Kanye says some of the things that he says and why he believes some of the things that he believes. And it helps you to realize that it isn't the fact that the guy got rich and started to become this person. He was always that person. If you were to turn to confidence in a dictionary at some point in the future, it wouldn't surprise me if you saw a picture of Kanye west watching this documentary. Really brought home how much the guy believed in himself when he had nothing, when he was nothing. He talks about in the documentary reciting his Grammy winning speech on the way to the bus stop. This is before he had had any records out. He didn't have a deal. No one knew who he was. But he was so confident that he was going to win a Grammy one day that he was getting himself ready for that occasion. He was envisioning himself on that stage giving that speech. He knew he was destined for greatness. He never questioned that. He. He never wavered in the belief of what he was capable of. And he got so angry when others couldn't see his genius. There's a clip in one of the episodes where he's getting really annoyed with a friend of his because his friend won't agree that he's a genius. And his friend is saying, but you haven't done anything yet. And Kanye's response is, so what? I am a genius and you will refer to me as so you will see me as such. And that confidence is something which anybody can build, you know, to have the self belief that you're going to be a big star one day, that you have somebody following you around with a video camera again, when you don't even have a record out, you don't have a deal. There is no prospect on the outside that you're going to be a successful music artist. That takes some balls. And even when he did start to have records out as a producer, records that were big records, but he really, really wanted to be a rapper, wanted to have his own deal as a rapper. And labels were turning him down left, right and center saying, now you're a producer, you're a great producer, but you're not a rapper. He kept going. He didn't settle. He didn't settle for less than he believed that he was capable of. He Just didn't give a fuck what anybody else thought. He knew what he wanted and he was confident that he could achieve it. And it reminded me a little bit of myself when I was younger. I always wanted to be a pop star. Music was life for me. I wasn't interested in school. It was just a sort of something that I had to do. But I was going to be this worldwide star. So grades didn't matter much to the most to the discomfort and the horror of my parents. And why watching the Kanye documentary Jesus Genius reminded me of that is I similarly had that confidence in my ability. I, I would sit in class and instead of doing the work, I would be drawing tour posters and plastering big letters across it saying sold out to represent my sold out world tours that would be occurring imminently. You know, I would get on any stage that I could to perform, to sing, to dance. I was in school plays. I was known as the performer in school, which was kind of at odds with my sort of offstage demeanor where I was quite introspective, you know. But get me on a stage and I could just go. I was like a whole other person. I would tell anyone who listened that I was going to be a bigger star than Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson won eight Grammys. He sold millions upon millions of records. But that didn't phase me. I saw the vision of myself. I saw the vision of what my life was going to become. And nothing was going to knock me off that the belief was real. And even later down the line when I kind of pivoted slightly from the artist world and moved to work for a record company and was managing acts and was on the business side. My model was Puff Daddy, as he was then Diddy or Love Now. I think it's called Can't Keep Up. And I was confident that I was going to be a bigger mogul than Diddy was. That's what I was going to do. I was going to find these acts, I was going to break them into the global market and I was going to manage all of these amazing careers. Now that didn't happen, obviously. I mean, I'm sitting here talking to you now. But I had such strong belief for a period of time that nothing that anybody could say could knock me off my stride. Nothing could stop me going after what it was that I wanted. And in doing that, it put me into situations and created opportunities that otherwise wouldn't have been there if I hadn't had the level of confidence that I had. So what happened? But what happened is that I started to let other people's thoughts and opinions get to me. People don't always understand the decisions that you make. They don't always understand the passions that you have. They don't have the vision for you that you have for yourself. They can't see it because they see life through their own lens, coloured by their own experiences, infiltrated by their own fears. So when they see you doing something that they don't understand, they're going to have thoughts about it. And those thoughts can sometimes be coming from really, really good place of wanting to see you do well, not wanting to see you get hurt, not wanting to see you fail. And so when after four years, nearly four years in the music business, I was still not making a lot of money, and obviously money is always the deciding factor in terms of success for a lot of people. Lots of people were questioning, well, do you think it's time you went and got a proper job? No. Do you think it's time you started to go and make some money? Given this music game enough time, now it's time to kind of go off and get a real job. These weren't new things that had been said to me. They'd been said to me for years. But there was a point where I started to let those thoughts get into my brain and I started to believe what people were saying, believed that the dream that I had for myself would never happen, the vision that I had would never happen. And most critically, I stopped exercising my confidence. Muscle confidence is like any skill. You've got to keep working at it in order to build it, in order to boost it, in order to be able to tap into it. When you're trying to fulfill a dream, when you're trying to execute a mission, when you're trying to get after a big, bold vision that you have for yourself. But because I stopped exercising that confidence muscle, I saw or I felt that confidence slowly and slowly dip, and I lost my belief in the vision that I had created for myself. I didn't lose all confidence. I mean, I did listen to everybody else and decided that maybe I do need to go and get a real job. So I went back and got my law degree and I had confidence in my ability to do well in my degree. And that proved so in terms of the results that I got. I had confidence in my ability to get a great job in the eyes of what people were saying about me, and I did that. I got into one of the top 10 firms in the world, but I lost confidence in my ability to trust My intuition to trust my gut. I lost confidence in my ability to think bigger than what other people were thinking. For me, I mean, look, working In a top 10 international law firm is a pretty big dream, don't get me wrong. But it wasn't my dream. And that's the thing. I lost confidence in my dream, in what I wanted, in how I saw my life playing out. And that is what led me to being a big law lawyer for 11 years. And slowly, over that period of time, that dream became more suppressed. And weirdly, my confidence became lower as well. So the whole point of this episode is a. To say, go ahead and watch the Kanye doc, because I think it is a masterclass in confidence. And it's a reminder that you have to keep working on your confidence. Confidence is something that everybody has. So if you've been saying to yourself that you don't have it, that you lack confidence, that you're just not a confident person, I invite you to stop doing that right now. And instead, I invite you to say to yourself, I am confident. And I can build my confidence levels. I can build them higher. And I can start to believe that the vision of the life that I want is possible for me. And I will start to believe that I can figure out the process without having all of the answers. I really want you to be confident. I want you to build that confidence. Because when you have that confidence, you will start to believe that you can get after what it is that you want. You will start to believe that living a life that's lit is possible for you. You will stop staying stuck living a life of lethargy, stuck in a place that you don't want to be. That confidence will give you that feeling. It will allow you to sit up straight, roll those shoulders back, lift your head up high, and believe that you can achieve the dreams that you have for yourself. So be as confident as you want to be. Be as confident as you can be. Be confident in your dream, not somebody else's dream. And if you need help with building your confidence, if you're not quite sure where to start, I've got you. I have a confidence journal. The confidence journal is something that I have been working on for some time. And it's six journal prompts questions that I ask myself when it's time for me to level up, to get after something that I haven't done before. And I need some belief. My. I need to shut down that inner critic that. That negative voice inside of me that's telling me that I can't and I need to get myself to a level of saying I can and I will. Confidence Journal is very straightforward. Six Journal prompts and whenever you're going to do something and you're not sure that you can, you sit down with that journal and you answer those questions and you get into your head and you clear out the negativity and you get to the position where you can believe, where you feel excited, where you feel amped up to start to get after what it is that you want. How do you get it? Well, it's free. What you do is head to iamryanspence.com and click the button saying get your free confidence journal and it'll be there for for you. And let me know how that works for you. Let me know how the prompts have made you think differently about your own confidence, how they made you feel differently about your confidence and what you're going to do with the newfound confidence that you're building. I'd love to hear about your successes. I'd love to hear about what's working for you. That's the whole point of why I do what it is that I do. So head to iamrinespence.com, download my free Confidence journal, which I have just updated this week. Please to know. And that will also get you onto my email list where you will hear from me each week about all things Triple C and just all things life. All things to help you move from living a life of lethargy to a life that's lit. See you next time. Thanks for tuning in to the Triple CE project. If you like the show, don't keep it to yourself. Go ahead, tell a friend. And tell me too by leaving a review to get more tips, tools, strategies to help you get from where you are to where you want to be. Head to iamroy spence.com and download my free conference journal. Don't forget to follow me on Instagram. I'm amrynespence and you'll be the first to know about the release of my upcoming book, Triple C Method. But for now, the only thing that I have left to say is stop living a life of lethargy and start living life lit.